Don't Panic
by Mouse and Stupid Productions
Summary: There's nothing to be scared about when you go to Hogwarts is there? No. No reason to panic...Unless you count drama, romance, breakups, shattered friendships, best friends and all that good stuff...Next gen. Alcohol, sex, drugs, plural POVs, swearing.
1. 1: Lyra

**A/N: Hi there...any of you who are sitting there at your computers thinking, "Mouse and Stupid Productions...I think I've read one of her stories...oh right! But it was so long ago I don't remember what it was anymore, gee thanks. Bitch." I apologise muchly that I'm not updating any of my unfinished stories. I also apologise that I'm publishing a new story. However, it's a good portion written already. And I will be pacing the chapters that exist already so that it works out and I won't get too behind. See, I wrote an honest to God novel in the past few months and that took up all of my time, since it was something close to eight hundred double spaced pages. And I was working on this story before that, so that's why it got shoved to the wayside.**

**Summary: Hogwarts 2017. Rose Weasley, Scorpius Malfoy, Albus Potter, Dominique Weasley, Roxie Weasley, Lucy Weasley, Emerald Zabini, Sam Baker, Will Corner, Dylan Abernathy and Lyra Malfoy start school. Naturally, hijinks ensue. Pretty much every single piece of teenage drama I could possibly think of is in this story. It also includes major appearances by James Potter II, Fred Weasley II, Frank Longbottom II and Lily Potter II. And just as a warning, no consecutive chapter is told by the same character... So, read on!**

**Chapter 1 - Lyra**

"And you'll write at least once a week," Mum said. "And you'll come home every holiday."

"Astoria, they're not going to school during a war," Dad said.

"Yes, but," Mum started.

"But nothing. We've put the fear of the Dark Lord in them, they're not going to go off and join the Neo-Death Eaters or something," Dad said. I snickered.

"Well, I might not," I said.

"Funny," Scorpius said. "Really funny." We've spent the past eleven (almost twelve) years of our lives worrying about being ostracised at Hogwarts because Dad fought for the wrong side during the War. He's assured us that given the choice, he would have fought with Harry Potter instead of against him and the only reason he didn't is because he wanted nothing more than his father's approval, and if we ever want his approval badly enough that we'll sign up to AK people, he'll disown us and we'll have to go live with Grandma Narcissa. We have this conversation once a month.

"Alright, let's review," Dad said. "First rule."

"Don't be a pompous ass," I said. "Or an arrogant one, or…or just an ass in general." Dad looked proud until Mum hit him upside the head for teaching me to swear. Scorpius snickered, becoming slightly less nervous.

"Second rule," Mum said, still glaring at Dad.

"Don't go exploring, because we'll get caught by Filch and hung in the dungeons by our toes," Scor said, his momentary lack of nerves over.

"Third, we won't break the rules because McGonagall will put us in detention for eons," I said.

"Four, we won't anger Professor Longbottom because you owe him your life," Scor said to Mum. Mum nodded. Ron Weasley saved Dad's life, Neville Longbottom saved Mum's.

"Five, any products we purchase at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes will not be used in a 10 metre radius of Hogwarts Castle proper," I said, cringing at the floor. Dad raised his eyebrows at me. He pulled out his wand.

"_Accio!_" he cried. I cringed as my trunk banged open in the hallway and the turn ups of my jeans flipped down traitorously. A stack of decoy detonators, three bins of Skiving Snack Boxes, two containers of Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder, shoes that allowed one to walk on the ceiling, a spell-check quill, a tin of extendable ears, a bag of dung bombs, a pot of instant pimple remover and a reusable hangman piled up at his feet. Scorpius was staring at it all with wide eyes. Dad covered his eyes in his hand as Mum's jaw dropped.

"Lyra Gemini Malfoy," she said in an even, measured tone.

"Hi?" I said nervously.

"The entirety of rule number five," she said.

"It's not at Hogwarts!" I insisted.

"But it's going there!" she replied.

"Yes, yes it is," I said, nodding in agreement.

"I can't deal with you," Mum said, turning from the room and heading for the kitchen. The moment the door was closed Scor and I were out of our seats, all of it in hand and ran for the hall. We dumped it in my trunk and slammed it shut, returning to our seats as Mum came back. We adopted sombre expressions.

"Where'd it go?" Mum asked.

"I disposed of it," Dad said. Mum nodded, and grabbed her cloak, heading for the entrance. Dad winked at us when she wasn't looking. I love my father.

We got to the station with ten minutes to spare. I grabbed my trunk and bounded onto the train, running down the length of it to the very last carriage and the last compartment. Two boys were sitting there, not looking at each other, but reading the same newspaper.

"I love the Quibbler!" I said by way of introducing myself. They both jumped and looked at me in terror.

"Is this stuff real?" the one with curly hair asked, gesturing to a picture of a Manticore.

"Yeah. Firsties?" I asked. They nodded. "Muggleborn?" I continued. They nodded again. "So cute…Anyways, I'm Lyra, erm, I'd like to sit in your compartment, and my twin brother, Scorpius will be along shortly to join us. And you are?"

The one on the far side looked terrified. He awkwardly brushed his brown hair out of his face.

"Sam," he said. "Baker." I looked at the other guy. He regarded me coolly.

"Abernathy. Dylan Abernathy," he said.

"Bond, is it?" I said. He smirked.

"Yes, M?" he asked.

"I like you," I said.

"Same goes," he said. Sam looked terrified.

"I'm a Muggleborn first year! Stop talking in code!" Sam yelled.

"Sam, we were just referencing a Muggle series," I said.

"James Bond…M…Oh!" he said, looking sheepish immediately afterwards.

"Nervous?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"It'll be okay. I have to go say bye to my parents, but then I'll be back," I said.

"Okay," Dylan said.

I turned and walked out of the compartment and as I did, I ran into Scor.

"We're in the last compartment, guys names are Dylan and Sam," I said briefly before carrying on to the platform. Mum and Dad were staring awkwardly at the train.

"You haven't been here since your seventh year, have you?" I asked.

"I haven't been here since my seventh year," Mum said. "He picked me up."

"Fun," I said. "Sorry about being a pain in the arse, Mum."

"Language, Lyra. Language. Please," she said.

"In which language would you like me to speak?" I asked. She sighed in a resigned way and hugged me goodbye. "Love you, Mum." I hugged Dad.

As I started to go back to the train, he grabbed me by the shoulder and whispered, "Get up to as much mischief as you can. Live your dream." I smiled and hugged him one last time before hopping on the now moving train. Considering my dream is to be the combination of James Bond and George Weasley, except a girl, mischief was definitely crucial.

I slammed the door shut behind me and promptly ran into a girl with really dark red hair.

"Sorry!" she exclaimed.

"Merlin, you're like my brother," I said, holding my head and hauling myself off the ground. A boy a little shorter than Scor was standing next to her and a little behind. "You look exactly like Harry Potter," I informed him.

"He's my Dad," the boy said awkwardly.

"Cool. And you look familiar. Got parents in the history books as well, have you?" I asked the girl.

"Yeah," she said, apparently still feeling bad about knocking me over.

"No, I can't do it, sorry," I said. She looked concerned. "Place you," I elaborated.

"Oh! Oh, it's okay," she said. "I'm Rose, by the way." She extended her hand for me to shake.

"Lyra," I replied, shaking her hand.

"Al," Harry Potter's awkward son said.

"Aha," I said. "Got anywhere to sit yet?"

"No," Rose said. "I'm avoiding sitting with my family."

"As am I," Al said.

"Got the same family then, do you?" I asked.

"Yeah," they said.

"Ah, well then, you should come and sit with us," I said.

"Who's us?" Al asked.

"Me, my brother, this kid Sam, and James Bond," I said. They looked confused as I led them down the corridor. "His name's technically Dylan, but I prefer Bond." They exchanged looks as I opened the door. Scorpius was sitting awkwardly on the bench down from Sam and all three of them were silent.

"Somebody die?" I asked.

"No," Dylan said.

"Right then," I said, sitting down next to Dylan. Rose and Al walked in awkwardly. Scor's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. Oh, my brother has a crush then doesn't he? How cute.

"You can sit here," he and Sam said in unison, patting the seat in between them. Rose looked confused, but sat none the less. Al sat next to me.

Nothing happened on the ride until the witch with the trolley came by. Sam and Dylan looked fascinated.

"We've got some new folks," I said, gesturing them. "So we'll have a bit of everything. Emphasis on the Cauldron Cakes and Pumpkin Pasties." She peered at me curiously.

"Astoria Greengrass," she concluded.

"No, sorry, she's my mum," I said. She nodded, before staring at Scor in the same way.

"Draco Malfoy…Draco Malfoy's son," she corrected.

"Yeah," Scor said, sounding as awkward as Al. She glanced at Al.

"Well, I'd know your parent's any day, Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley," she said. She turned her gaze to Rose. "And Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger." she shook her head to herself. "You hand them their first Pumpkin Pasty and before you know it you've got their grandchildren on the train. No, dear. Never from any of you," she said as I tried to pay her.

"Thanks," I said, confused. She nodded and walked away. Something she'd said clicked. "Hermione Granger! That's who you look like!" I exclaimed suddenly, pointing at Rose.

"Guilty," she said.

This was the most exciting thing until we were almost at Hogwarts. I'd gone to the loo in order to put on my robes and as I opened the door, a boy who looked incredibly like Al, along with a boy with fantastic dreads, tumbled into the door, squishing me flat onto the ground. The boy who looked like Al looked horribly embarrassed, but the other boy quickly kicked the door closed.

"She's coming, mate," he whispered to the Al-boy.

"What? Surprise attack?" I asked as the three of us stood. Let me say the loo is rather small.

"Hiding," the Al-boy whispered.

"From who?" I asked.

"My sister," the black boy responded, at the same time the Al-boy said, "my cousin."

"More Weasleys?" I asked, amused.

"Yeah," they said distractedly.

"Fred, how are we going to get out of here?" the Al-boy asked. Wait. Fred? Fred Weasley?

"Hang on a minute," Fred said. "I think I've got some darkness powder around…" he searched his pockets for a moment. "Bugger…" he whispered, looking at the Al-boy in a terrified way.

"She's only a first year?" the Al-boy said, obviously terrified. Fred raised an eyebrow at his cousin's apparent stupidity. "And the daughter of George and Angelina Weasley…" They gulped in unison.

"Darkness powder?" I asked. They both spun as though they'd forgotten I was here. "Or perhaps…" I dug further into my jeans pocket. "Decoy detonator? Dung bomb?"

"All three?" the Al-boy said.

"I love you," Fred added. I smiled.

"I guess you picked the proper loo, didn't you," I said. They nodded. "Now, let's see…Detonator, bomb, darkness?" I suggested.

"Yes," they said in unison. I dropped the detonator. It scuttled under the door and into the hallway before buggering off. We heard it make a loud bang in the distance. I opened the door and handed Fred the dung bomb, which he flung after the detonator. I dropped the darkness powder and we made a run for it. They followed me back to my compartment. Al and the Al-boy took one look at each other and groaned.

"Not you," Al said. Scor, Sam and Dylan looked confused.

"Hey, Rosie!" Fred said.

"Dylan, Sam, Scorpius, Lyra, this is Fred," Rose said. "And Al's brother, James."

"Why are you here?" Al demanded of his brother, James.

"Because Roxie's trying to kill us," Fred said. Rose raised her eyebrow. "I said she could use a haircut." Rose and I rolled our eyes.

"And that she wasn't allowed to date," James added. Fred looked sheepish. I glared at Scor.

"Never," I said.

"Wouldn't dream of it," he said.

"Dating, or telling her she can't?" Dylan said.

"Dating," James and I replied in unison. We high fived. The train suddenly lurched to a halt. James and I fell into the empty seat. Fred fell on his arse.

"Hi," Dylan said to James, who was inadvertently sitting on his lap.

"Hi," James replied.

"James, this is Bond. Bond this is James," I said. "Okay that's weird."

"Just a bit," James and Bond answered in unison.

"You all excited to get sorted?" Fred asked.

"Hell yeah," I said. Rose, Scorpius and Al paled. Bond and Sam just looked confused. "What houses are you in?" I asked James and Fred.

"Gryffindor," they said. "What about your parents?" James continued. I noticed he hadn't removed himself from Bond's lap.

"Slytherin," Scorpius and I answered. James and Fred regarded us curiously.

"Oh, Merlin, the two of you are twins, aren't you?" Fred asked.

"Yeah," Scor said.

"I know the hair is completely different, but we have the exact same eyes," I said.

"Completely…different?" Sam asked. Well, slightly. I have curly, long (long, long, _long_) blonde hair, whereas Scor's is short and looks like he just got off a beach. But we both have the Malfoy blonde hair and the Black family eyes.

"Sam, are you familiar with the concept of 'sarcasm'?" James asked. He looked abashed.

"Give him a break. He didn't get a James Bond reference as a Muggleborn," I said.

"Oh," James said, standing up. "So, Fred and I are going to go retrieve our trunks, hopefully we won't be maimed, and we'll see you lot at the Feast," he said.

"Bye, all," Fred said, following him out. We stood up and grabbed our various trunks and animals. My cat glared at me. I petted him through the bars of his case. Scorpius had gone for the more practical owl. I didn't envy him.

The six of us put our trunks and pets in the indicated stacks and continued along a beach path in the dark until we turned a bend and Hogwarts in all its lit glory shone across the lake. I've heard stories, I've seen pictures but nothing compares. My jaw dropped, and I felt my expression mirrored by all the first years with us.

"Four teh a boa'," called a giant man. This would be the legendary Hagrid. The six of us looked trapped.

"I'll go sit with my girl cousins," Rose said. "There are four of us this year." Al looked trapped.

"Lorcan and Lysander!" he said suddenly. "I'll go with them! C'mon Sam." Sam and Al took off through the crowd.

"We probably should have a fourth," Scorpius said. Before we could even try and figure anything out, a silky voice came from the darkness behind us.

"'Sup," she said. "Mind if I share your boat?" Scor cringed. I smirked.

"And you are?" Dylan asked.

"I'm their cousin, who are you?" Emerald Zabini asked.

"Em, play nice," Scor said.

"My aren't you friendly," she replied.

"Give him a break," Dylan said.

"Why?" Em asked.

"He fell in love today," Dylan said.

"I did not!" Scor insisted as we piled into the boat.

"Well then you have a major crush," I said.

"I hate you all," he said, crossing his arms and looking out the front of the boat in shell shocked wonder.

"On who?" Em asked, excitedly. I'm not sure if it's Aunt Daphne's fault Em loves gossip or if it's her dad's mum's. Uncle Blaise isn't that bad, and I like Em, but Blaise's mother is evil, swear to Merlin. And Aunt Daphne isn't exactly nice, come to that. It's a miracle Em turned out the way she did.

"A girl," I said. She glared at me.

"How much was it? Seventeen sickles?" she asked.

"Two galleons," I said. She glared and reached into her robes before handing me the money.

"Really?" Scor asked. "You were betting on my sexuality?"

"No!" we insisted.

"Then what?" Dylan asked.

"More as to whether or not he's asexual," Em said.

"That's a sexuality," I said.

"Yeah, but it's true," she replied. Scor looked concerned.

"And I'd be asexual because…?" he demanded.

"Em had a theory that Granny Cissy castrated you at birth so that the name 'Malfoy' would die with you," I explained. Dylan burst out laughing.

"Well, she's wrong," Scor said. "I still have my – erm, my – well, the-"

"The family jewels?" Em supplied. He flipped her off as the boat gently nudged the bottom of a set of rock hewn stairs. I climbed out before offering Dylan my hand.

"I say we leave them," I suggested.

"Quite," he agreed. We walked off up the stairs, Em and Scor following at a distance. At the top of the stairs we caught a glimpse of Rose and three other girls, all equally as beautiful as Veela. One actually looked like she could be. I walked up. There was Rose, another girl with brown hair and blue eyes and glasses, the Veela-esque one, and a tall black girl who looked remarkably like Fred.

"You'll be Roxie then," I said to her.

"Have you seen my brother? I'm gonna fuck him up," she said, staring over all of our heads at the crowds.

"I like the Weasleys," Dylan said.

"Just a sort of general," I made a circle motion at them.

"Yeah," he agreed.

"Me too," I said.

"So, where's this brother of yours we've heard all about?" the Veela like girl asked. I pointed vaguely to a spot behind me.

"You haven't heard all about him!" Rose insisted. The other three Weasleys looked at her like she was mad. "Bugger off." They smiled. The smiles made them look related. Because otherwise they didn't look it at all.

"Let's go in, shall we?" Rose suggested, grabbing my arm and stalking towards the school.

"So you think my brother's hot," I said.

"You're not going to tell him, are you?" she asked, seeming panicked.

"Are you kidding? I'm the best secret keeper on this planet," I said. "I'm also a great Keeper, but that's for Quidditch try outs." She laughed nervously.

"You can't tell Weasleys anything private, because once one knows, the rest of them do. Just a general warning," she said.

"Duly noted," I replied. She nodded and I followed her into the Entrance Hall. A tired looking teacher greeted us.

"Hi," he said. "I'm head of Hufflepuff, I teach Charms, m'name's Professor Macmillan, erm, yeah. So in about five, you're going to go through those doors, put on the Sorting Hat, it'll tell you which house you're in, and it's fun," he said.

"Is he dead?" I whispered to Rose.

"No, that's the History of Magic teacher," she corrected.

"Right," I replied. A harried looking man ran out of an ante chamber and tapped Professor Macmillan on the shoulder.

"Ernie, go to sleep," he said. "I'm never letting my kids near you when you've been drinking again." Professor Ernie Macmillan nodded and stumbled off down the stairs.

"Oh! Nevi - Professor Longbottom!" Rose called. So that's Neville Longbottom. Got it.

"Yes, Rose?" he asked, seeming tired.

"My mum says 'hi'," she said. He nodded and smiled.

"Now, everyone, I'm the head of Gryffindor, I'm also Deputy Headmaster, and your Herbology professor. In a minute you'll enter the Great Hall and it's important for you to know that your house will be like your family. I know mine was," he said. One of the doors swung open. "And here we go!" he said. We followed him into the Hall apprehensively. At least, apprehensive on my part. The hideous tattered hat was sitting on a stool, just like Dad had said. Rose gripped my elbow nervously. Scorpius sidled up to us and took her hand before she could hyperventilate. She leaned into him and let go of my elbow. I felt the blood return to my arm.

The hat broke into song, shocking the Muggleborns and not even fazing everyone else. I only tuned in at the end.

"_So, even though you may all scream and shout_

_Have no doubt that I will sort you out"_

"Well that's promising," I muttered. Neither Rose nor Scor were paying attention to me. I rolled my eyes. Neville stood up and picked up a list.

"Abernathy, Dylan!" he called. Dylan winked at the three of us and sat on the stool. The hat had been on his head for all of one second when it yelled, "Gryffindor!"

Ackerly, Chase, became the first Hufflepuff, Anderson, Raven the first Slytherin.

"Baker, Samuel!"

Sam walked awkwardly up to the stool and cringed as it touched his head.

"Gryffindor!" it yelled. He sighed in relief and sat across from Dylan. I noticed James and Fred sitting next to them.

Bancroft, Laura; Bennett, Grant; Briar, Stephanie; Clark, Kent (or Superman. I can't decide…); Corner, William; Finnegan, Fiona; Finnegan, Ioan.

At least Scor and I aren't the only twins.

Jack Flintwood; Damian Gray; Andrew Grey; Kevin Griggs; Jasmine Hemmingway; Carrey Jakes; two Jenkins'; three Jones'; Juniper, Keenan, Kellan, Kimberly.

"Loosely, Ana!"

"Hufflepuff!"

"Lucy, Gavin!"

"Hufflepuff!"

"Malfoy, Lyra!" Oh god. That's me. Everything's been a blur, but now I have to go up there. What if the hat rejects me? Or worse! Puts me in Slytherin!

I trembled as I walked up to the stool. I sat like a boy and held onto my knees as the hat spoke in my ear.

"Why are you frightened?" it asked. "That's not a very Gryffindor way to be, is it?"

"Bravery means being scared shitless and doing it anyway," I muttered. The hat laughed.

"Right you are. Such a long Slytherin lineage, be a shame to break it. Capability to be in Ravenclaw. Determination to be in Hufflepuff, but the desire to be in Gryffindor. A boy perhaps? The need to be with your friends?" Merlin, hurry up. "You're right about the bravery bit, by the way…GRYFFINDOR!" Sam and Fred cheered loudly while James and Dylan leaped out of their seats to applaud wildly.

"Shut up!" yelled a girl who looked remarkably like the Weasley cousin with glasses.

"Sorry, Molly!" Fred yelled back. I handed Scorpius the hat and made my way to the Gryffindor table, sitting in between James and Dylan. They both hugged me as Scorpius put the hat on. Please let him be in Gryffindor. He seemed to argue with the hat as I had done, and turned pale. The hat rolled its eyes.

"Gryffindor!" it yelled. I cheered loudly. Thank Merlin.

"Potter, Albus!" James grabbed the table cloth nervously. The hat debated.

"Gryffindor!" We all sighed in relief. Al's friends the Scamanders were sorted into Ravenclaw, as was Alex Thomas, and then,

"Weasley, Dominique!" The Veela girl walked up.

"Gryffindor!" the hat yelled. She came and sat down next to William Corner.

"Weasley, Lucy!" The girl with brown hair and glasses walked up and was sorted into Gryffindor.

"Weasley, Rose!" Rose walked up nervously. She sat down. Scorpius's eyes were glued to her. I considered snickering at him, but managed to refrain.

"Gryffindor!" The hat yelled. Both she and Scorpius sighed in relief. James, Fred, Dylan and I avoided each other's eyes as she sat down next to Scor.

"Weasley, Roxanne!" Fred ducked.

"Gryffindor!" She sat down at the table and glared at Fred. He waved.

"Oh bullocks… she's in my house," he muttered to Sam. Sam looked concerned.

"Zabini, Emerald!" Em walked up, looking haughty. I waved. She winked at me and went to join her Slytherin housemates.

"Welcome to Gryffindor," James called down the table. Oh yeah. This is going to be fun.

**Please read and review, because I'm not updating until I get three reviews. And just so you know, I have the next chapter sitting on my hard drive collecting cyberdust. So if you want to read it, you should review. Yeah.**

**Mousie**


	2. 2: Scorpius

**A/N: Well, I didn't get three reviews. I didn't even get three. Which depresses me. But, anyways, I'm updating. Mainly because I need a quick and easy way to reference previous chapters without having the whole thing open on word. Extra super special shout out to alikmionejean, since she reviewed. I'm going to wait until there are at least three total reviews for this story before I update. That's how it's going to work. To get chapter three, there must be three reviews. To get chapter four, there must be four reviews, to get chapter five there must be five reviews and so on. You understand I hope. **

**Well, thanks to those who are reading...**

**Chapter 2 - Scorpius**

After the feast, I followed James and Fred, who seemed to know where they were going, to the Gryffindor tower. Dad and Mum hadn't had any idea where it was, so it was probably good Lyra and I made friends with fellow Gryffindors off the bat. She's crazy, my sister. Absolutely barmy. Just bounds into a random compartment, "hi, you're a person, I'm going to talk loudly at you and we'll become friends instantly!" It's a skill I really wish I possessed. She definitely got Mum's outgoing-ness. I got Dad's sulking in the back thing. I think Lyra would call that brooding and then laugh hysterically for three days. It's weird, to think once we're in seventh year, I'm going to be the oldest student at Hogwarts, she's going to be second oldest. It's going to be strange.

Anyways, I followed Fred and James, and we were followed by Dylan (who Ly calls Bond…?) Sam and Al. Behind us, the girls were walking with their other Weasley relatives. They seemed to be excited about being at Hogwarts finally. I have to wonder what they're talking about, because they keep looking at us and laughing. Ly even seemed like she was having fun, which is unusual for her and girls her age. Of course, how anyone could not like Rose is beyond me. It's not that the other Weasley girls aren't gorgeous, but Rose is just…something else. I don't know how to describe it. She just…outshines all other girls I've ever met. Yes, as Ly pointed out to Em and Dylan, I have it bad. And I'm not going to deny it either. Because nothing's going to end that. Except for perhaps, me being me.

We got to the boys dormitories and James and Fred pointed us to our room. The four of us barrelled in talking happily. A panicked looking boy sat up from the bed where he was reading.

"You'll be that William Corner person, right?" Dylan asked. Holy Merlin he's like Ly.

"Will," he replied.

"Well, I'm Dylan, this is Al, Sam, and Scor," he said.

"Oi!" cried a loud voice.

"And this is M," Dylan added.

"Bond," Ly replied, peering under the beds.

"What are you looking for?" I asked.

"Sorry, Scor. Trying to make friends without me? Right! Sorry, I'll bugger off. Have you lot seen a…robust…white cat? He's got green eyes, looks like death warmed up?" she asked.

"Like Keith Richards?" Dylan suggested.

"Yeah, except gone grey…" she replied. I never really understand what she's carrying on about, but she only became interested in Muggle anything to irritate Grandpa Lucius and Granny Cissy. But, even now that Grandpa Lucius is dead she still does it solely to piss of Uncle Blaise's mum.

"If I see Blair, I'll let you know," I said.

"Blair?" Dylan asked.

"_Blair Witch Project_," Ly replied, standing up and dusting off her knees.

"Oh! I know that film!" Sam exclaimed.

"Bravo, you paid attention growing up," Dylan said.

"Well, if you lot see him, let me know," Ly said, walking out.

"That was a girl," Will muttered to himself.

"Yeah," I said. "Also my sister."

"Oh. Oh, erm, never mind," he said. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Do you think my sister's cute?" I asked him, seeming disturbed to my own ears.

"You've got a crush on my cousin after knowing her for mere hours," Al pointed out. "Don't seem shocked."

"Right," I replied, sitting down on the bed with my stuff next to it. As I was unpacking into my bedside table, Blair came slinking into the room and jumped onto my bed.

"Is that M's cat?" Dylan asked. I looked at the cat.

"Yes," I replied.

"I'll take him back!" Will and Sam exclaimed in unison. Dylan, Al and I stared at them in utter confusion. Will looked abashed when I stared at him. Sam didn't. Strange, both of them. From the floor below us, we heard girly giggles.

"One moment," I said, grabbing Blair and walking down the steps. James, Fred and four other boys were in the one below us. Ly was sitting next to their fire.

"Found your cat," I said.

"Oh! Thanks, Scor!" she exclaimed.

"James and Fred, right?" I asked apprehensively.

"Correct!" Fred exclaimed, high-fiving me after lunging off his bed. I nodded.

"Oh!" Ly said. "And Mark," she asked pointing at one of the boys on the beds, "and Frank, and Jasper and… and…"

The last boy looked up from his reading. "Tommy," he supplied.

"Ah! Yes, Tommy," she finished grinning up at me.

"It's the first day, Ly," I said.

"Your point?" she asked.

"Not acceptable first day behaviour," I replied. "And since I believe it is impossible for boys to ascend the girls' dormitory stairs, I'm going to go find Rose and make her keep you in your room and perhaps lock the curtains." She giggled at me. The six boys looked confused.

"Why is she not being acceptable?" James asked in a confused tone as I picked her up by the elbows.

"Don't worry, she won't remember any of this in the morning," I said brightly. Fred and James exchanged looks.

"Why not?" Fred asked.

"She's sleep walking," I explained. All six looked shocked.

"I am not!" she exclaimed.

"Favourite colour?" I asked.

"Purple!" she said adamantly. "No. Red!" I raised my eyebrow. "Blue?"

"Just ask her straight forward questions, ie, 'what's your name?' 'what's your favourite colour?' 'what are your parent's names?' That's how you tell," I explained to the boys.

"Aha," James said. "That makes sense. Does she do this often?"

"Not so often. It's been getting better for years," I explained.

"What happened?" Fred asked.

"Well, when we were four she got _somno vigiliam_, and that doesn't go away for a very long time," I explained.

"And that is…" Tommy asked.

"Waking sleep," I said. "It's a combination of narcolepsy and insomnia. It's quite strange. But essentially, she'll be awake one moment and asleep the next but she carries on through the two. And she doesn't remember what's going on when she was asleep."

"That's got to suck," Frank said.

"Yeah," I agreed. "But this is the first time in three months, so that's progress."

"Are you going to go find Rose?" James asked. "Because I can help with that."

"Yeah, thanks," I said, picking Ly all the way up and shaking my head in confusion as she fell honestly asleep.

"I've got it," James said, picking her up.

"Thanks," I replied, leading the way down to the common room. The girl who had yelled at James during the Feast was sitting at the couch reading.

"Molly, we haven't had classes yet and I know for a fact you've already finished your summer assignment," James said.

"So?" she said. "I have my O. this year thank you, and it never hurts to get a leg up."

"Wow, you're your father's daughter," James muttered.

"I have some of Mum in me!" she exclaimed indignantly.

"That's wonderful. Could you go get one of the four Weasley's who just started this year?" James asked. She huffed and stormed up the girls' stairs. He set Ly down on the couch. She snuggled into the pillows. I rolled my eyes. James smirked in my direction.

"So…Rose, huh?" he asked. I stared at him momentarily before glaring in the direction of the stairs. I realised absently that I was as tall as him even though he was the year above me. But I suppose we're probably close to the same age.

"So, when's your birthday?" I asked, still glaring at the bottom step.

"August 29," he replied.

"Four days," I muttered.

"Sorry?" he replied.

"You're four days older than me and Ly," I explained.

"September second?" he asked.

"Yeah," I replied.

"That sucks," he said. "A day too young…"

"And how did you know about Rose exactly?" I demanded.

"Al told me," he replied.

"I thought you two didn't get along," I demanded sourly.

"We do when it comes to gossip," he replied brightly as Rose and Dominique came down the stairs.

"Oh hey Scor!" they said in unison.

"Hi," I replied.

"What am I?" James demanded. "Dragon dung?"

"Only in the morning," Dominique answered brightly.

"I hate you," James replied. She smiled winningly at him.

"You sent Molly?" Rose asked, not looking at me. That hurts.

"Yeah, Ly's asleep and we can't return her properly," James explained.

"Oh," Rose said.

"We can help with that!" Dominique exclaimed.

"That was the idea," I said.

"No way!" James said. "You're a girl?"

"I really hate you, James," Dominique replied.

"Hey, you're the one who cuts her hair off," James said, raising his hands as if he was washing them of any participation. She hit him in the arm. "And you go by Dom. Have you heard a more boy-ish name?" he asked me. I choked.

"Scorpius?" Rose said.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"No, as in, that's a more boy-ish name," she said. James considered.

"That's true," he said.

"Bugger off," I said.

"I'll tell Mum you're swearing," Ly said. All four of us jumped.

"What are your parent's names?" James asked before I could ask her anything.

"Draco Malfoy and Astoria Greengrass," she replied.

"Oh good," I said. Rose and Dominique exchanged concerned looks.

"I'm _somno vigiliam_," Ly explained, eliciting confused looks from Dominique and concerned ones from Rose.

"That's terrible!" Rose said. "How long?"

"Since I was four," Ly replied.

"So it's clearing up now, yeah?" Rose asked.

"Yeah! This is the first time in three months!" Ly exclaimed.

"What's _somno vigiliam_?" Dominique asked.

"Disease," Ly said. Dominique took a surreptitious step back. "I'm not contagious."

"You're only contagious for the first three months," Rose said matter-of-factly.

"So I haven't been contagious for about eight years," Ly said. "Important question." She turned to me. "Did I do anything embarrassing slash stupid?"

"You lost Blair and both Will and Sam have crushes on you," I replied. She looked momentarily disgusted.

"And where's my cat?" she asked.

"Somewhere. I found him but then I heard you giggle and decided that was more pressing. He'll turn up," I said.

"Is giggling bad?" Dominique asked.

"No! It's just, she doesn't giggle, she laughs," I added. "And if she's giggling she's asleep."

"Okay, I'll help you with that," Rose said.

"Thanks!" I exclaimed, aware I was talking unnaturally high. Ly kicked me in the foot. I jumped. "Sorry. Knack jump." Ly rolled her eyes at me. I kicked her. She smirked.

"So, gentlemen, we're going to return to our dormitory so we can make it the appropriate pit of hell, if you don't mind," Ly said.

"Pit of hell?" Rose asked, sounding scared.

"Hell yeah!" Dominique yelled, disturbing a group of seventh years in the corner. They glared at her angrily. She smiled and waved. A girl who had to be her older sister looked pissed from a separate corner. "Sorry Ally!"

"Is that your sister?" Ly asked.

"Cousin on my mum's side," Dominique replied, dragging Ly and Rose off up the stairs.

"She didn't talk to me," I muttered.

"Well, so long as we all know you've got a crush on her, it'll work out eventually," James said.

"And when will eventually be?" I asked.

"You're a first year. These things take time."

**A/N: Review! You know you want to...**


	3. 3: Rose

**A/N: superspecial shout outs to alikmionejean, and now as well to Mrs Angela McCarty ily xx who also reviewed.**

**Along that line, I had a request for a little guide of who's who and how they're all related to each other. So, as follows.**

Rose Weasley - _Ron and Hermione's daughter._

Scorpius Malfoy - _Draco and Astoria's son._

Lyra Malfoy - _Draco and Astoria's daughter, also Scorpius's twin._

James and Al Potter - _Harry and Ginny's sons._

Will Corner - _Cho Chang and Michael Corner's son._

Dylan Abernathy - _muggle born._

Sam Baker - _muggle born._

Dom Weasley - _Bill and Fleur's middle daughter._

Roxie and Fred Weasley - _George and Angelina's children._

Lucy Weasley - _Percy and Audrey's daughter._

Ioan and Fiona Finnegan - _Seamus and Lavender's twin children._

Emerald Zabini (and eventually Lizzie Zabini) - _Blaise and Daphne Greengrass's daughters. They are Scor and Ly's first cousins._

**so, without further ado, the third chapter.**

**Chapter 3 - Rose**

I love Hogwarts.

I don't have to deal with my little brother for one, and for another, I have friends who aren't Weasleys. I have five friends who aren't Weasleys, which, while not very many on the grand scheme of things is a lot more than it's ever been in the past. The twelve of us are next to inseparable, what with being completely insane in a lot of the same ways. You've got Will, who the boys first bonded with because he was in their dorm. You've got Sam, who we bonded with on the train, Dylan who made fast friends with Ly (he calls her M she calls him Bond…?), and Scorpius who's Ly's brother, and of course, he's Scorpius so we kept him, naturally. Then James and Fred started hanging out with Ly and Dylan, so we got them too, in addition to me, Roxie, Dom, Lucy and Al.

It's almost the summer holidays, and I would have invited Scor and Ly round, but Dad would've done his nut if I had. As it is, Dylan, Sam and Will are staying at their place for the hols. I want to go with them, but Dad wouldn't let me in a million years. Mum might, but she'd have to whip Dad into submission first. As he's an Auror that's actually harder than it sounds. We tried at Christmas and he almost killed Uncle Percy, who just happened to be standing there. Mum laughed. Aunt Audrey didn't. She also doesn't have any problem with Lucy going and staying with the Malfoys this summer if she wants to. I'm very jealous, as are Al and James who have also been banned.

The five of us were in our dorm packing for the summer. Ly, Dom and Roxie had all of their clothes and shoes in a pile in the centre of the room and were trying to figure out which article of clothing belonged to which one of them. We'd discovered on the third day of school that all of them wear exactly the same size everything which is dead useful for sharing clothes, but they share so much so often they've forgotten which actually belongs to them. Lucy and I were packing out books and rolling our eyes at our dorm mates.

"No, I think that's mine," Ly said, grabbing a grey sweater out of Dom's grasp.

"Why do you think that?" she asked, handing it over. "I swear I have one just like it."

"I think that because that one has an L on it and this one has a D," she said, tossing a different grey sweater at Dom.

"Oh!" Dom said, grabbing the one with a D on it and tossing it back to her bed. I'd finished packing, as had Lucy, so the two of us left them to it and went down to join the boys. So far, only Sam, Will and Fred were present.

"What's taking them so long?" Sam asked, in reference to the others.

"James is busy duelling Frank for the rights to the stereo for the holidays," Fred explained. "But Frank slipped something to him at breakfast, I think it makes him see the colour red as purple, so I don't think James is entirely right in the head enough to win."

"Al, Dylan and Scor are trying to, well, no. Dylan and Scor are trying to convince Al he can leave all of his essays from this year here at school and just bring his philofax with all his assignments in it, but he's refusing," Sam said.

"Dom, Roxie and Ly are fighting over whose clothes are whose," Lucy said. "It's actually rather funny, but somewhat violent."

"I think their best solution is to just move in together for all time so that they don't have to try and figure it out, and just have one sort of central closet," I said.

"Oh, that'd work," Lucy said. "We could probably arrange that. You and I could have a closet in the dorm, they could have a closet in the dorm. Just think! It wouldn't explode violently every time you opened the door!"

"Luce, our _room_ explodes violently every time you open the door," Will said. "And it's all because of Dylan."

"He's more of a slob than the girls, I guarantee it," Sam agreed.

"Have you ever been in our dorm?" I asked.

"No," he said.

"Then you cannot possibly know that," I continued. From the boys dorm there was a squeal as though a five year old girl was being chased by a giant spider and James came tripping down the stairs followed by Frank, laughing, and dragging James's trunk in addition to his own. James dove behind the stack of my trunk, Lucy's trunk, Fred's trunk, and Will's and Sam's. We stared at him in concern, except for Fred who looked from him to Frank and then back as though a light bulb had gone off.

"Oh! It was the one that makes cauldrons seem alive, wasn't it? Not red to purple," he said. Frank just laughed some more and deposited James's trunk with us.

"Tell him thanks for letting me use the stereo this summer!" he called over his shoulder ducking out of the common room.

"That bastard," Fred said without conviction.

"What exactly did he give him?" Lucy asked in concern.

"I think it's an herb he's been cultivating in the back of his dad's green house that makes cauldrons appear to be alive," Fred said.

"It tried to eat me," James muttered from behind the barricade of trunks. "It kept asking me why I'd put so many scarab beetles in it." Will and Sam desperately avoided looking at each other, while Fred ducked down behind the barricade with James to inform him the cauldron hadn't actually tried to eat him.

"If you'd just let me take one, I mean one, I'll – I'll –" came Al's voice from the stairs above.

"You'll sleep with it under your pillow and that would be depressing," Dylan said. The three came into view. Scor and Dylan each had controlling hands placed on Al's shoulders and were steering him down the stairs. With sanity as their friends, Al and Dylan were in Muggle clothing, but Scor was in his robes still with proper clothing underneath that wasn't his Hogwarts uniform. He looked very dashing, but also like he was going to the opera. As they hit the common room, Dom, Roxie and Ly came bounding down the stairs carrying all three of their trunks. I guess that means they've managed to sort out the clothes situation. Ly caught sight of her brother the moment they reached our group.

"Why?" Ly asked him in reference to his clothing.

"Because I dislike pissing off my grandparents," he said. Ly rolled her eyes.

"Mate, Dad and Mum already got their inheritances from them when Grandfather died," she said. "You should be worrying about not pissing off them."

"And I'm not! I don't break every single rule Dad laid out for us before school!" he insisted. Everyone stared at Ly.

"Every rule?" James asked, peering up from the luggage.

"Namely, 'no use of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes' products within the Hogwarts grounds," she said. James burst out laughing.

"Well that one was shot to hell, wasn't it?" he asked, cackling.

"Yes, you're very funny," she replied. I smiled. They're very cute. I can see them getting together. I rather want them to. Because then Ly and Scor would have to come to all the family reunions and I would get to spend time with my best friends. That would be nice. We arrived at the gates in time to pile haphazardly into the carriage. Filch glared at us as we stacked double into the seats. James, Lyra, Dylan and Fred squeezed into the seats on one side of the carriage, leaving Lucy, Sam, Will and Al to cram into the seats on the other side. Dom and Roxie sat on the floor against the far wall, leaving me and Scor to sit in the middle of the floor. I ended up using Ly's legs as a back rest, Scor was using Al. Dom and Roxie immediately used our laps as foot rests.

"Ah, leg room," Dom said, smirking at everyone.

"Shut up, Dom," James said, reaching around Ly to bat her upside the head. She laughed and exchanged high fives with Roxie.

"So, when do we all get to arrive chez Malfoy?" Will asked.

"I dunno. Aren't you lot coming home with us?" Scor asked.

"Right," Sam replied. "We knew that." Dylan rolled his eyes.

"Willy didn't, but that's because Willy broke the family tradition of being an intelligent Ravenclaw and decided to join us chivalrous, idiotic, brawny shmucks instead," Ly said.

"Says the girl who was supposed to be the Slytherin princess," Fred muttered.

"Hey! The last woman born into the Malfoy family was also a Gryffindor!" Ly insisted. We all stared at her in shock, especially Scor.

"Who?" he asked.

"Great-great-great Aunt Clara, remember?" Ly asked.

"Yes, because I so know who that is," Scor replied.

"You know, she's the one _not_ on the family tree," Ly said.

"Right, the mysterious hole where there should be a name that doesn't exist," Scor said.

"Well her name was Clara and she was Head Girl, a Malfoy and a Gryffindor," Ly said.

"Obviously the goal to strive towards," Scor said.

"Yeah, actually," Ly replied, crossing her arms, and adjusting her posture, causing James to catch an elbow in the face. "Sorry," she added offhandedly. "What's _your_ goal, Scrappy?"

"Scrappy?" James and Fred asked in unison.

"Maybe, Liar, I'm the sane one for not having it figured out," he replied.

"Well, we all know I'm bat shit nuts," she said. The tension broke as they burst out laughing.

"Scrappy and Liar?" Al asked.

"Childhood nicknames we created for each other," they said in unison.

"Okay," I said. The carriage lurched to a halt in front of the platform. We leapt out and made a break for the last compartment. I stole a seat, Scor sitting next to me.

"Well, I'm not sitting on the floor," Ly said, grabbing Dylan and storming out. James and Fred followed suit. We heard the next compartment door slam shut, before there was a scuffling sound. We all peered out the windows in time to see three third years leave the compartment our friends now occupied.

"It worries me that she scares off students who are older than her," Scor remarked.

"Dude. Your sister's a force of nature," Roxie said. "Can't say the same about my brother, but…"

"But I can say the same for mine," Al said. "He apparently takes after Grandpa James. At least, that's what McGonagall said."

"And every other professor," Dom replied.

"So true," Lucy said.

"I worry about your family," Sam said.

"And Scor's," Will added. I smiled.

"You should worry about us Weasleys. We're terrifying," Dom said, growling at him. He honestly looked scared.

"Don't panic," Scor said.

"Helpful," Will said.

"Very," Sam added. We Weasleys laughed. There was laughing outside the compartment and someone fell into the door. It slid open.

"Oh! Sorry! Wrong compartment," the boy said. I think his name is Finnegan. Ioan. He's rather cute. "Wait…Rose, right?" he asked me. I looked startled.

"Yeah. Ioan, is it?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. "Nice to formally meet you."

"Yeah you too. We have classes together, right?" I asked.

"Most of them," Scor answered in a tense voice. I glared at him.

"Do you lot mind if I join you? My sister's driving me insane," he said.

"We're rather full if you haven't noticed," Scor said grumpily. It was true. We'd stuffed eight people into six seats.

"Be nice," Dom said.

"We've got friends next door who aren't quite as crowded," I said.

"Do you think they'd mind if I sat with them?" Ioan asked.

"No! Especially not if I went with you," I said.

"No, I'll go," Lucy said.

"No, it's okay, I can," Roxie said. Ioan looked confused and Scorpius pissed.

"It'd be my pleasure," Dom said, turning on her Veela charm. What the hell?

"I've got it covered," I said slowly, standing up and exiting the compartment. I opened the door to the next one as the Exploding Snap cards blew.

"Why are you covered in soot?" Mum asked when I stepped off the train.

"Fred, James, Ly and Dylan were playing Exploding Snap," I explained. The four in question stepped off the train after me. Mum regarded them curiously.

"Who's the boy with sandy hair?" she asked in her "secret" whisper.

"That's Ioan, Mum," I said. As I said it, Lucy, Roxie, Dom, Scor, Sam and Will disembarked.

"Who's the blond?" she asked, eyes wide.

"Scorpius," I said shortly.

"Malfoy?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"If I didn't hate his father, I'd tell you to go for him," she said sadly.

"Mum!" I exclaimed. She laughed girlishly. I covered my eyes.

"Aunt Hermione!" my family yelled, surrounding us.

"Hello all," she said. She glanced in shock to a place over my shoulder. I turned. Scor, Ly, Will, Dylan and Sam were greeting a tall blond man who could've been Scorpius's twin if he were thirty years younger.

"You're all friends with them, yeah?" Mum asked, gesturing.

"Yep," the seven of us answered in unison.

"Huh," she said.

"Can we go?" I asked.

"Yeah, of course," Mum said. Before we could, Dylan and Ly bounded over to us.

"Bye!" they exclaimed, hugging all of us.

"Bye!" we said back. I was hugging Dylan so I almost missed Ly slipping a piece of paper into James's hand. I wonder what that was.

We got into the large car and headed for the Burrow.


	4. 4: Dylan

**A/N: Special shout outs to alikmionejean, ., and Mrs Angela McCarty ily xx for their reviews. The rest of you who are reading this and not reviewing, I'm sending cyber dust mites at you. No, there's no good reason why they're cyber dust mites. They just are.**

**Disclaimer (since I haven't done one yet): I do not own the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. I wish I did, because then I'd be fabulously rich and famous - actually, no. That sounds sort of like hell. Erm...yeah. Anyways, I'm not JK Rowling. However, Emerald Zabini (who may or may not be in this chapter, I don't remember), Will Corner, Sam Baker, Dylan Abernathy and Lyra Malfoy are all mine. Mine. *random Gollum moment***

**Chapter 4: Dylan**

Mr Malfoy was really nice. This was my first impression. My second was, "Damn they have money."

Looking at Ly and Scor, you can't tell they're rich. They seem incredibly normal. Like, normal to the extreme. But no, looking at their dad, the main thing is money. My family isn't exactly poor, but we don't have enough money for a flat at the centre of London along the banks of the Thames. We live in Wandsworth. On Harris Street. We don't have enough money for a place with more than two bedrooms.

Or enough money for a driver.

It was a huge luxury Muggle car, a Limousine in fact. Mr Malfoy sat in the back with us, our trunks in the boot. Their driver was a wizard.

"How was your first year, Lyra? Scorpius?" Mr Malfoy asked. The driver didn't talk.

"Great, Dad," Ly said.

"We made a bunch of new friends," Scor said.

"I gathered," he said, gesturing to me, Sam and Will.

"But we've made more than them," Ly said.

"Am I not enough for you?" I asked, pretending to look wounded. Mr Malfoy laughed.

"No," she said, sticking her tongue out at me.

"Yeah, she needs James too," Scor said, raising his eyebrows and winking in no particular direction.

"James?" Mr Malfoy asked curiously, looking as goofy as his son. "Who's James?"

"Her boyfriend," I said.

"He is not!" Ly insisted, looking as though I'd betrayed her on a deep emotional level.

"Then why'd you give him your address?" Will asked, speaking for the first time.

"I did nothing of the sort," she insisted, crossing her arms.

"That's right," I said, I hit Will in the arm as if letting him in on a secret. "It was a _love note._"

"Ah," he said in mock comprehension.

"I need more girl friends," Ly said.

"No you don't! You love us!" I said. Mr Malfoy laughed whole heartedly.

"Dad, can we send them all away?" she asked.

"Nope," he said. "They're entertaining."

"Thank you, sir," I said. "I'm Dylan by the way." I shook his hand. "That's Will and that's Sam."

"So was it really our address?" Scor asked.

"Yes," Ly mumbled, covering her mouth with her sweater.

"Why?" I asked. "He's a Weasley. He doesn't need to defect to your house."

"This James character's a Weasley?" Mr Malfoy asked, eyes lighting up.

"Well, technically, he's a Potter," I said. Mr Malfoy's eyes widened in a thrilled grin.

"Good girl, Ly," he said.

"Thanks, Dad," she said. "And I gave him our address so that they could all come over if their parents would let them."

"How many Weasleys are we talking about?" Dad asked.

"Seven," Scor answered, scratching the back of his head. Mr Malfoy blinked in shock.

"You've made friends with seven Weasleys?" he asked.

"Well, five Weasleys, two Potters," I corrected.

"Of course you have," he said, scratching the back of his head. "Will they all fit, what with Emerald and Lizzie coming to stay for the summer?"

"Em and Lizzie are coming to stay for the summer?" Ly asked.

"Yeah," Scor said. "Uncle Blaise and Aunt Daphne are going to France with Morgana and refused to bring Em and Liz with them."

"That was kind," Ly said. Mr Malfoy seemed to be trying not to laugh.

"So, let's see," Scor said. "You and Mum take up your room. Then Ly and I take up two, and Em and Lizzie can share with Ly, so that's only three."

"There are more than three rooms in your house?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Ly said awkwardly.

"Or, alternatively, we could just shove you lot all upstairs," Mr Malfoy said.

"This is true," Ly said. "That leaves well, all the rooms empty except yours. I suppose we could put Lizzie in a room of her own, since we're so much older than her it would be weird for her to hang out with us."

"It's only two years," Mr Malfoy said, "but I see your point. So the attic it is?"

"You're going to stick twelve people in an attic?" Sam asked.

"Thirteen, actually," Ly said. "You forgot about my cousin Em."

"And if we really wanted to, we could stay in the rooms," Scor said.

The car turned into a parking garage under a tall apartment building. We stepped out and the driver piled all our trunks up.

"Drop those in the attic," Mr Malfoy commanded of his driver. We followed him to an elevator standing apart from its fellows. Given the three Muggles that walked right past it without a second glance, I suppose it was like the Leaky Cauldron. Mr Malfoy waved his wand at it and the door flew open. We followed him in. The moment the doors closed, they opened again and we were looking at a posh foyer.

Please let me repeat that these people have money. And a lot of it.

As Sam, Will and I looked around in awe, a feverish looking woman came out of what I assume was the kitchen.

"Lyra!" she exclaimed, rushing forward to hug her daughter. Lyra looked shocked.

"Hi, Mum," she said, stiffly hugging her.

"Scorpius!" their mum said, hugging Scorpius too. "I've just done some tea, it'll be ready in a minute." She bustled back off into the kitchen. Mr Malfoy stared after her in a concerned way.

"Is she okay?" Ly asked.

"Erm…yes," Mr Malfoy said hesitantly.

"Dad, she looked happy to see me, so I doubt quite highly that she's 'fine'," Ly said. Mr Malfoy looked uncomfortable.

"Dad?" Scor asked.

"Yes, she's fine," he repeated. "I trust you'll show your friends to the attic." He turned and followed his wife into the kitchen. Scor and Ly looked highly concerned.

"Okay," Ly said finally, and walked into the main cavity of the flat. Up ahead was a wall of large French windows onto a balcony that overlooked all of London it appeared. In the centre of the room was a large flight of stairs. "This is the way to the attic." We followed her up the stairs. She turned at the level we were on and showed us to a second more secluded staircase. The door at the top of the stairs said "Attic."

Instinctively, I knew this was a posh apartment building in down town London and "attic" wasn't going to mean dust, cobwebs and family secrets. I still wasn't prepared for the reality.

"Holy…" Will started.

"Mother of God," Sam said. My jaw was glued to the plush carpeting.

It looked like a Sherlock Holmes hideout. A large collection of clothes of every shape, size, fabric and colour lined one end. There was a multitude of antique furniture lying around. The room itself looked like it'd been pulled out of a home decorating magazine about "DIY: The Library Attic Closet." Because all the walls were covered in dark mahogany shelves, all full of ancient books. Some didn't even have covers. And in the far corner was a spiral staircase.

"What is this place?" I asked.

"Home," Ly said, tossing her bag onto a chaise lounge that was easily from the nineteen tens. She flopped onto it. Will, Sam and I stood near the door as Scor fell onto a different over stuffed arm chair.

"You can't break anything," said a voice from behind us.

"Em!" Ly exclaimed, jumping out of her seat and hugging the girl behind me.

"Ly!" she exclaimed back. "So who are you lot?"

"Dylan," I said, extending my hand. Em shook it. Sam and Will looked shell shocked. Especially Will. "That's Will and Sam," I added, pointing at them. "They're unused to being around girls," I added in a stage whisper.

"Ah…" she said. I nodded. "That's quite pathetic."

"Believe me, I know," I said.

"They're almost as bad as Al," Ly interjected.

"Except Al's sort of skittish around everyone," I said.

"So true," Scor said. Will and Sam sat awkwardly on the carpeting. Ly, Em and I rolled our eyes at them. Scor sat with them.

"Are we all staying up here?" Will asked.

"Yeah," Ly and Scor answered at the same time.

"And are we being joined by our friends for sure?" Sam asked. Ly shrugged. There was a thud from the window. Ly rushed over to it and opened it to allow an owl to land. It stuck out its leg pompously. I never knew owls could be pompous, but I guess that's reasonable. It appeared to raise its eyebrow as Ly ran to untie the letter. She pulled it off and un-scrolled it. The owl looked at a feathered lamp disdainfully.

Ly read rapidly, and then smiled widely. "They're coming Tuesday next."

"Which ones?" Scor and I asked in unison.

"James, Fred, Rose, Al, Roxie, Lucy and Dom," she said. "I'll just go tell Dad." She bounded out of the room.

"Dom's coming," Sam said, trying to keep it casual.

"And Roxie," Will added, trying to keep his tone casual as well.

"Weasley?" Em asked.

"Yeah," Scor and I replied in unison.

"Oh, dear Merlin," she said, falling back onto a couch. I like her. "Do you two like them?" Em asked.

"No!" they exclaimed in unison. I rolled my eyes.

"You're both terrible liars," I said. As one, they threw two pillows at my head.

"I don't like Dominique!" Sam exclaimed. "Everyone likes Dominique!"

"And you're a straight guy, so it stands to reason you do too," Scor said.

"Shut up," he grumbled. We laughed at him.

"And Will, you can't lie to us," I said. "We've all seen you scribbling in your journal."

"It's not a journal!" he insisted.

"What is it?" Scor asked.

"It's where I keep my Transfiguration notes," Will said. He crossed his arms and looked moody.

"Perhaps we had a studying intervention with the wrong member of our dormitory," I said to Scor. He nodded in agreement.

"I have one just like it where I keep my Charms notes!" Sam exclaimed. My jaw dropped in abject horror.

"I don't know how I'm friends with you people," I said. "You are sick and wrong, and we should have you committed."

"Oh yeah, Dylan? And what are you good at?" Sam asked. I knew he didn't necessarily ask it to be rude, but he has this blunt way of putting things.

"Taking pictures," I said.

"Such a handy life skill," Em said.

"What are your skills, Em?" I asked. "Lounging? Shopping perhaps?"

"Leave her alone," Will said. Scor, Em and I stared at him in shock. Sam had pulled a composition book out of nowhere and was scribbling in it. This must be the infamous Charms notes book.

"Lounging while shopping, in fact," Em said. The corner of my mouth twitched. We burst out laughing. "No, I dunno what I'm good at, but I'm a terrible shopper. I know I look like I should be fabulous at it, but I'm really rather crap."

"So what do you intend on doing with your photography?" Scor asked.

"Photojournalism," I replied instantly. And it was true. Ever since my cousin had gotten me a camera for my eighth birthday, I'd taken more photos than any child alive and I'd string them together to make stories.

"Cool," Em said. Just then Lyra bounded into the attic.

"Dylan!" she said, out of breath. "Your cousin's here!"

"Why?" I asked.

"I dunno. Said something about not getting an owl at all, and everyone else is okay to come stay by the way, I talked to Dad," she said in a rush.

"I'm going to go see what Amy wants," I said. I ran down the two flights of stairs to the main floor.

Perhaps I should explain why my cousin is coming to find out why I haven't owled. When I started showing signs of magic at age four, my parents (Muggles, the worst sort) wanted nothing to do with me. Amy, my cousin, had been out of Hogwarts two years and decided to take me in. She's raised me for as long as I can remember. She's the one I live with in Wandsworth. She's the only family I've got. And the only family I need.

I reached the kitchen, where I saw her sitting with Mr Malfoy and Mrs Malfoy and a nine year old girl who greatly resembled Em. I cleared my throat to announce my presence. I could tell from her posture that Amy knew exactly who had just walked in the door (she was facing the other way) and was not pleased with me. I shrunk back as she whirled around.

"Would it have killed you to owl me?" she asked.

"No," I squeaked.

"I mean, you send the preliminary along, but don't send any confirmation or anything," she said.

"I'm sorry!" I insisted, hugging her. When I do this, she generally stops being angry. She sighed in exasperation and hugged me back.

"Don't do that to me okay? I was worried sick," she said. I could hear Mr Malfoy chuckling to himself. Mrs Malfoy swatted him in the arm. He stopped laughing.

"I'm sorry," I said again. "I meant to write, I really did, I just got distracted."

"It's okay," she said, holding me at arm's length and making me look her in the eye. "Just don't do it again." I nodded solemnly. "Now go," she said. "Hate for you to miss valuable conversation time with your friends." I smiled and dashed back out of the room. I could hear the adults laughing still. When I got back to the attic, it was to find Ly had stolen Will and Sam's notebooks. She was rifling through them while dancing out of their reach. As I walked in she stopped dancing away and stood there in shock, staring at one of the books.

"This isn't class notes," she said. "These are Charms you're working on creating…"

"Yeah," Sam said awkwardly. "May I have my book back, please?" She handed it back, still looking shocked. Will held out his hand as well. She handed it back and sat down looking stumped.

"Here I was, all prepared to mock you and now I can't," she said. "Ruin my summer," she muttered.

"Somehow, I think you'll live," Scor said. I fell into a chair next to her.

"Yeah, besides. James is coming Tuesday next," I said. The guys exploded in laughter when she hit me in the arm.

**Review! You know you want to...**


	5. 5: James

**A/N: Here's chapter five. Yeah, I know. Three chapters in one day. But I can't help it. I need reference points as I go on to write chapter 19...Yes, that's how far ahead I am. Ha. Ha ha ha. ha. No one's reviewed chapter four at this point, but to those of you who soon will, thank you for your kind reviews. Well, now, I'm being conceited aren't I? I hope your reviews are kind. If they aren't, that's totally cool. I get it. But, yeah. So, anyways. Chapter five.**

**Chapter 5: James**

I hate my life.

Yes, I, James Sirius Potter, resident of Number 12 Grimmauld Place, son of Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley, hate my life.

Why? Because of a girl. It's always because of a girl.

"Mate, you're muttering again," Fred said from the other kit bed.

"Shut up," I said.

"No, you're going to wake Louis, Al, and Hugo," he said.

"Great," I replied, falling out of my bed in Uncle Ron's room. Fred followed me down the stairs to the kitchen. Uncle Percy was asleep at the table. He and Aunt Audrey are in a "fight." This is because she's pregnant and therein hates him. I don't understand why this caused utter loathing. I think it's because he finally stopped drinking and it confuses her. That and the hormones. You don't get to live in the Weasley family and not know what pregnancy is like. Even if you're a twelve year old guy. We've all heard the, "I want fish tacos, and red velvet cake, and Oreoes. No! Wait, make it lime juice instead of Oreoes!"

This is because at all times, there is at least one pregnant Weasley. This has been true for the past nineteen years. In order of birth? Victoire, Molly, me, Fred, Rose, Lucy, Dom, Roxie, Al, Hugo, Lily, Louis. Then there was an eight year gap. The currently pregnant? Victoire, Aunt Audrey, Aunt Hermione, Uncle Charlie's girlfriend whose name he won't tell us, and Aunt Angelina. It's ridiculous. Except for Vicky and Charlie's girlfriend, all of them have two kids. Going for three. Because we Weasleys so need to multiply.

But anyways, I'm not depressed because of this. I'm depressed because I have to spend the first two weeks of the summer at the Burrow with my whole family. I want to go to London to be with Ly and Scor and Dylan and Will and Sam, but no. Because of our stupid family tradition, I get to stay here in utter madness. With my varying degrees of pregnant aunts. I mean, honestly! Aunt Angelina is thirty nine, Aunt Hermione is thirty eight, and they're pregnant. Vicky, yeah, she's nineteen. Charlie's girl, she's supposedly 25. None of us are sure though, since he hasn't been home for twelve years. I still don't understand how a twenty five year old Muggle would fall for a 45 year old dragon trainer, but there you have it. I'm so confused.

Fred opened the freezer and pulled out a huge tub of chocolate ice cream. I'm more of a chocolate and brownies person myself, so I pulled out the pint of that. We removed ourselves to the den and sat.

"Hate being stuck here as much as I do?" I asked absently.

"Yeah. Probably more. Your mum isn't pregnant," he replied.

"So true, and thank Merlin," I said. "Want to run away?"

"To Ly and Scor's house?" he asked. "Yeah, kinda."

"It was ridiculous when Uncle Ron grounded Rose for that at Christmas. It's not like she can help that she fell in love with a Malfoy the moment she saw him," I said.

"Probably best she didn't tell him that bit. And my god man, you're one to talk," he said.

"Shut up," I insisted. He smirked, looking exactly like his father.

"Okay," he said. "You going to admit it?"

"Never," I replied.

"Admit what?" Rose asked, sitting on the other side of Fred.

"That he's in love with Lyra Malfoy," Fred said, handing her a spoon. He's always prepared for these things.

"I am not!" I insisted.

"I bet they gave Ly this much shit as well," Fred said. I rolled my eyes.

"No, they didn't because I'm not in love with her, nor is she in love with me," I said.

"So, Rosie, you counting down the days until next Tuesday when we get to go to Chez Malfoy?" Fred asked. I think he's trying to play Cupid. Bastard.

"No!" she insisted a little too quickly. Fred and I smirked. "Maybe," she amended. "Okay, yes, fine. I'm counting down the days, just like you, just like James, just like Al."

"Fair enough," Fred said. "Now, Jamie, about the love note Ly slipped you…"

"It was not a love note! It was her address!" I insisted.

"Oh, Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou, Romeo?" Fred proclaimed. "Wait, here's my address so you'll know which window to moon over!" I shoved him sideways.

"Soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet the sun," Rose continued. I expect random Shakespeare quotes from her, but not from him.

"And by Romeo, we mean you, and by Juliet, we mean Ly," Fred clarified.

"Thanks, I was having trouble grasping that," I said moodily, stabbing at a chunk of brownie.

"Here for you, mate," Fred said, patting me on the shoulder.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Jamesie!" said a voice much too close to my head for comfort. I slapped the offending face and rolled over. "Ow! James!" said the voice again, this time ripping off my blankets as well. I screamed at the cold and sat up. Fred was standing over me holding his face.

"Sorry, mate," I said.

"Sure you are," he said. "We're leaving. I thought you might want to join us."

"We are? Now?" I asked.

"Yeah," he replied. Fuck. I launched out of bed and grabbed a random pair of jeans off the floor, realising as I put them on they were a few inches too short and therefor belonged to my little brother. I groaned in exasperation and pulled them back off, before hopping around looking for a pair of jeans that might actually fit me. I eventually found a pair crammed between my bed, the wall and our collective pile of brooms. I pulled them on and started looking for a shirt. Eventually, I found one in the last place I'd expect – the dresser. I grabbed my broom from the previously mentioned stack and bounded down the stairs after Fred. Dad and Aunt Hermione were waiting for us. Uncle Ron was still asleep and Mum had refused to accompany us on principle. The principle being that it was before ten am, therefore no one was allowed to breathe near her thank you very much. I think it's a by-product of when I was a little kid, because, apparently, I'd go into Mum and Dad's room every morning and say, "Mummy? Mummy are you sleeping?" at like, four am.

The rest of my cousins were already assembled and were staring at me like I was barmy.

"Sorry," I said. "I tried to find jeans in our room and it didn't work immediately. Al, you left a pair of jeans on the floor." He looked horrified.

"Why didn't you bring them with you?" he asked. I shrugged. He groaned in frustration and bounded back into the house and up the stairs. He came back moments later with the jeans in tow, carrying something and wearing an amused expression. "Forget something?" he asked me.

"No…" I said. He dropped what he was holding at my feet. I realised it was a pair of shoes. My shoes, to be exact. I looked from the shoes to my bare feet.

"Right," I said, stepping into them and doing up the laces. Dom and Roxie laughed wheezily. They were leaning against each other, obviously slightly less awake than I was. I opened the boot and added my broom before sliding into the car first so that I wouldn't have to sit in the middle. Fred piled in next to me, followed by Rose, Lucy, Al, Dom and Roxie. Dad drove while Aunt Hermione sat in the front seat holding her pregnant stomach. Every bump we hit in the road made her turn slightly green. By the time we got to London, the fog had cleared and it was turning into a sunny day. Dad drove the car into the parking garage of a high rise and drove (like he knew what he was doing) to level three. He parked the car. A man sitting by one of the lifts came over to him.

"Mr Potter, sir?" he asked.

"Yes," Dad replied.

"Lovely," he said. "I'm Gerard, the Malfoys' butler. May I help you with the baggage?"

"Sure," Dad said, looking uncertain.

"If you'll excuse-" Aunt Hermione said before opening the door and sprinting for fresh air. Dad popped the boot.

"You'll have to excuse my sister-in-law. She's pregnant," Dad said.

"Oh," Gerard the butler said, pulling out our trunks and bags. "Huge fan, by the way, sir. I mean, of course during the war as well, but you've revolutionised the way we deal with criminals and I think it's fantastic."

"Thank you," Dad said, sounding awkward.

"You thought I was a Muggle, I'll take it?" Gerard said.

"Yes I did," Dad said.

"Nah," Gerard said, pulling out my broom, Dom's broom and Fred's broom. "I was a first year Hufflepuff during the Battle of Hogwarts. The prefects had to throw me into that tunnel, I wanted to fight so badly. Probably best they did."

"Oh," Dad said.

Aunt Hermione reappeared. "Sorry about that," she said. "Just needed fresh air."

"Right, well, if the children will get out of the car, we can be on our way," Gerard said. Dom shoved Roxie a bit and she opened the door. We all slid out and formed a haphazard circle around the butler, who proceeded to stack all our belongings and levitate them towards one of the lifts. It was sitting all by itself, apart from the rest. He directed the luggage at it. The lift seemed to swallow it whole without even opening the doors. Then the doors themselves opened and it was empty. We piled in.

As soon as the doors closed they opened again on a foyer. We stepped inside experimentally. It was empty.

"Well, I've got to see to the luggage," Gerard said. "Very nice to meet you, Mr Potter." He turned and left through a small side door. As soon as he was gone, the door in front of us opened. A tall man with thinning blond hair was standing there. I could almost feel Dad and Aunt Hermione go on the defensive. It's weird to think they didn't get along at school when Draco Malfoy's children are so…awesome.

The last time I'd seen Mr Malfoy had been at King's Cross where he looked impeccably put together. This morning however, his hair was unruly, he wasn't wearing robes and he looked remarkably like Scorpius.

"You'll excuse my wife's absence. She's attempting to rouse the children," he said.

"Malf-" Dad started. Aunt Hermione elbowed him. "Draco," Dad said. "I'm going to need to scan your house for Dark artefacts."

"Of course, Pott-Harry," Mr Malfoy said. "I mean, given that my family is blacklisted and I work at the Ministry, you do run a check every two months, and in fact the Department for the Control of Restricted Artefacts checked last week, but by all means." Dad was not amused.

"I'm better at this than they are," he said.

"Right," Mr Malfoy said. "I mean this sincerely, understand, but why aren't you Minister for Magic yet?"

"Because I don't want to be," Dad said.

"Right…" Mr Malfoy said.

Before Dad could say anything rude in reply there was a shriek from above us.

"They're here?" a girl's voice exclaimed.

"Yes! That's why I've been trying to wake you up!" a woman's voice yelled. Suddenly there was a thundering noise. The lot of us crept closer to the door Dad and Mr Malfoy were standing in in time to see our friends, led by Lyra come sprinting down the stairs. Her hair was sticking up in odd places and she was obviously wearing her pyjamas but she was still Lyra. I smiled in hello, but she tackled me instead, throwing her arms around my neck. I turned beet red, but hugged her back. Dylan, Sam and Will took the more demure approach to saying "hi" and actually said "hi." Rose and Scorpius said hello awkwardly before Dom "accidentally" bumped into Rose, shoving her into Scorpius. At this point they hugged briefly and let go, both pink in the face. Through all this, Ly had still not let go of me.

"Well, let the boy breathe," Aunt Hermione said. Lyra immediately let go of me and straightened her shirt awkwardly. I'm pretty sure I had a stupid grin on my bright red face. Everyone else had finished saying hello and it was now time to meet people's parents.

A harried looking woman came down the stairs and crossed to Mr Malfoy. "Are you going to invite them in or make them stand in the entry way?" she asked. Mr Malfoy looked sheepish. "Please, do come in, everyone." We followed her into the main part of the flat. It was brightly lit by sunlight and seemed nice. Aunt Hermione looked around appreciatively. They live in a different part of London than the Malfoys, or even us. Of course, we live in a dodgy neighbourhood. Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron live in the posh part.

Once we'd all assembled, the four adults turned and stared at us expectantly.

"Hi, I'm James," I finally said, extending my hand to Mr Malfoy. He shook it. I shook Mrs Malfoy's hand as well. Dad nodded to himself as though pleased I'd picked up manners somewhere between the Burrow and London.

"I'm Lyra," Ly said, shaking Dad's hand and Aunt Hermione's. "I've heard all about you," she added. Aunt Hermione and Dad exchanged horrified looks. Ly didn't seem to notice. "Mostly about how you were super brave during the War and everything, but we also got to hear a lot of work talk during our childhood. It's weird to think we've got a free house elf because of someone Dad knew, like actually knew, at school," she said. Aunt Hermione and Dad exchanged confused looks. They both turned and stared at Mr Malfoy, who turned pink and looked away. What the hell?

"I'm Dom," Dom said, shaking the Malfoys' hands.

"I'm Roxie," Roxie said.

"I'm Rose," Rose said.

"I'm Scorpius," Scor said, introducing himself to Dad and Aunt Hermione. There was something of a knowing smile on Aunt Hermione's face when he shook her hand, but she didn't say anything.

"I'm Fred," Fred said.

"I'm Lucy," Lucy said.

"I'm Al," Al said.

"Dylan," Dylan said.

"Will," Will said.

"I'm Sam," Sam said, shaking all four adults' hands. Mr and Mrs Malfoy stared at him in confusion. So did the rest of us.

"Sam, you've been staying with us for two weeks," Mrs Malfoy said kindly. "We haven't forgotten who you are."

"Well, I figured I'd be on the safe side since I don't really say much," he said. There was an odd strangled sound coming from Dylan. It took me a minute longer than usual to realise he was trying not to laugh. In a cosmic move to cover the awkwardness, a house elf came out of a door to the right at that moment.

"Brunch is ready everyone, if you'd all follow me," she said, bowing smartly and heading towards another door. Aunt Hermione looked disturbed.

"Minty is a Free Elf," Mr Malfoy said. "Drives a hard bargain too."

"Ten galleons a month is a living wage, Mr Malfoy, I'll accept not a knut less," Minty the house elf said. Aunt Hermione smiled.

Minty opened a door and a dining room appeared before us, the table set for eighteen. My jaw dropped. If you were lucky, you could fit eighteen people in my kitchen. But they'd have to be on the table in places and perhaps nineteen if you jammed someone in the oven. Two girls were already sitting there, obviously sisters. The older one looked like she was Al's age, and the younger one looked like she was Lily's. They stood up when we walked in and the little girl shoved her hand behind her back.

"Lizzie," Mrs Malfoy said in a warning tone. The little girl brought her hand back from behind her back and sheepishly dropped a half consumed pancake onto her plate before crossing her arms grumpily. I snickered. "Please, everyone, have a seat," she said. I grabbed the nearest chair and sat, Ly sitting next to me on one side, Fred on the other. Will sat next to the older of the two sisters. Huh…Dad and Aunt Hermione sat down awkwardly. I don't think they'd expected hospitality.

"So, where's Weasle-Ron?" Mr Malfoy asked.

"Probably still asleep," Aunt Hermione said.

"And Ginny?" Mr Malfoy said.

"Also still asleep," Dad said.

"Mum doesn't do anything before ten," I added.

"I suppose she can afford not to, especially since it's off season," Mr Malfoy said.

"Yeah," Dad said. I decided their conversation had become boring and turned my attention instead to food. There were heaps of pancakes every few feet and carafes of orange juice and coffee with cereal and toast intermixed with the floral arrangements. I immediately went for the pancakes.

"So is this just for the special occasion of our arrival?" I asked Ly.

"No," Dylan said, leaning around her with his mouth full. "It's like this every morning." He accidentally sprayed Ly with crumbs in the process. She wiped her face, obviously slightly disgusted.

"You are unhygienic and gross," she said to Dylan.

"Says the girl who walks around dripping swamp goo," Dylan said.

"Swamp goo?" Fred and I asked in unison.

"Just from the Portable Swamp," she said.

"Oh, well that's okay then," I said. If she personally dripped swamp goo, I would have to reconsider liking her. But since it's from a pranking implement, I suppose that's okay.

"You were disgusted by the idea of me dripping swamp, weren't you," she asked me.

"Who? Me?" I asked. "No!" She raised her eyebrow. "Okay, maybe a little."

"I'm not right now!" she said proudly.

"That's very nice," Fred said, as my mouth was full.

"Thanks," she said. Then she rolled her eyes at me. "You've got soot on your nose," she said, standing next to me. I gulped down my pancake in nervous horror as she used the hem of her t-shirt to wipe off my nose. This meant just a strip of her stomach was visible, and I couldn't stop staring. I was saved further humiliation, however, by Dylan dropping something innocuous on the table. It sat there a moment before exploding into Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder which immediately turned the room black.

Thankfully, no one can see you turn beet red when it's dark. "Hey, Ly?" I said as she tried to find her chair again in the ensuing panic.

"Yeah?" she asked.

I smirked to myself. "I think you've got soot everywhere."


	6. 6: Dom

**A/N: Hi. Sixth chapter. Third day or something sickening like that. Hahahaha... I make myself laugh. Which is probably for the best. At least I don't normally make myself cry...**

**Chapter 6: Dom**

The summer was over too quickly. Of course, it's summer, so that may be self-explanatory. Summer is the golden time. Especially because you can get up late, you don't have to brush your hair and you are not obligated to get out of your pyjamas. At least, not until your roommates start complaining that you've been wearing the same ones for three days now and nothing else, for the love of Merlin go take a shower.

In my own defence, that only happened once. And I was sick at the time, due to my habit of getting sick in August.

So far as summers go, it was rather unremarkable. Except for the fact I didn't spend it at home or at the Burrow. This was new. And I liked it. I still got to be surrounded by family, but also by people I wasn't related to. People who don't think I'm annoying because I'm better at Quidditch than they are, but merely because I, as previously mentioned, have questionable summer hygienic procedures. No big sister gushing about her fiancé. No little brother badgering me about Hogwarts. Just friends. Best friends at that. It was fantastic.

But then it was over. And it was back to school work and prefects and curfews. And uniforms. And being woken up by shrill voices belonging to one of the aforementioned "best friends."

"I can't find it!" Ly screamed. I held my ears and rolled over in horror. There was sunlight coming through the open window.

"Find what?" Roxie asked. She sounded just about as awake as I was.

"My other shoe!" she exclaimed.

"Please, not so animated. It's really, bloody early," Roxie said. I snickered into my pillow and curled back up into a ball.

"Eight o'clock is not early!" Ly said. "We have to be at the train by ten thirty at least!"

"Train?" I asked, sounding dead to my own ears.

"You know, Dom, the Hogwarts Express," Roxie said. "Big scarlet steam engine that takes us to school every September?"

"But yesterday it was August," I said, sitting up. The room was in even greater disarray than normal. All of the clothes belonging to the three of us were scattered everywhere. There were even three pairs of jeans, four tank tops and six socks on the foot of my bed. All our school books were piled in another corner, three cauldrons stacked near the door, telescopes, scales, all that was jammed on Roxie's bed. Three empty trunks stood near the doorway. Roxie was also sitting up in bed looking confused while Ly hopped around on one foot looking for a second black converse shoe. One that I'd seen the night before lying behind the bookshelf next to the window in the attic.

"Yes, yesterday was August, but today is September," Ly said. "September first, in fact." Oh. Oh shit. School.

"Your shoe's behind the bookshelf in the attic that's next to the stairs to the roof," I said. She and Roxie stared at me like I'd gone insane. "I'm good at finding things, thank you," I said defensively.

"Thank you," Ly said, sprinting for the door. However, the door swung open at that exact moment, whereupon James attempted to bound into the room, tripped over the trunks and went sprawling into Ly. They landed in a heap, pink in the face, in the middle of the room.

"Sorry!" they both exclaimed getting to their feet and dusting off their respective jeans. They've been doing things like this all summer. Ly dodged around James and the trunks and made for the attic.

"Dom, have you seen my Quaffle?" James asked. I thought about it for a second.

"Yeah, it's in Scor's room," I said. "Where in Scor's room, I couldn't tell you."

"Thank you!" he exclaimed, dashing back out and tripping over the trunks again.

"Suppose we should get up?" Roxie asked.

"Probably," I said.

"Mmkay," she said, closing her eyes again. She was asleep within seconds. I, however, was now fully awake. I sighed laboriously and got out of bed. I grabbed one of the pairs of jeans from the end of my bed and pulled them on. I rummaged around for a shirt which I swapped for my pyjama shirt and then went to work finding a pair of shoes for myself. Somehow, all the shoes had become partner-less and were buried under various pieces of furniture. I eventually found two matching shoes that were probably Ly's and decided it was probably time to start packing.

This meant standing in the middle of the room looking lost. Then Ly came running back into the room wearing both shoes and joined me in the centre.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Me? Trying to figure out where to start with the whole 'packing' thing," I said.

"Oh," she said. We stared around the room looking hopeless. Suddenly, the answer was clear.

"Clothes in one, school stuff divided up into the other two," I said. She nodded and we set about finding all the shoes so we could pile them at the bottom of one of the trunks. I left her to the clothes part and went on to start manhandling the cauldrons into one of the trunks. This was a Herculean task that was only accomplished when Will and Sam came bursting in looking for Will's owl, Fluffy.

"Could you guys sit on this trunk?" I asked them. They looked confused but did as they were requested to do. The latch got within a centimetre of closing, so I put my foot on top as well, managing to snap it shut just before it would have spring loaded the boys off of it and left me in very awkward splits.

"Thank you!" I exclaimed. They looked confused. "All three cauldrons are in that one," I explained, pointing at it. They, if possible, looked more confused.

"I'm never going to understand girls," Sam said. "Ever."

"Maybe between the two of us we could come up with some contraption that allows us to have like, a girl to guy dictionary implanted in our brains," Will said, running back out, followed by Sam.

"And they say we're confusing," Ly said, staring after them. I shrugged.

"How's it coming on your end?" I asked.

"Great, except I think I may have forgotten to leave Roxie any clothes," she said. We looked over at her still sleeping form.

"No, she's smarter than that," I said.

"Who? Me or Roxie?" Ly asked.

"Roxie," I replied.

"Of course," she said. We advanced on the stack of books in the corner and started throwing them with abandon into the last trunk. The thuds could probably be heard by the entire flat. Finally, we stacked the scales and the telescopes inside and closed the lid. I looked around the room. There was nothing left in it except for the three trunks and the three of us.

"Mission accomplished," I said, holding out my hand for a high five. I got one. "Now, we just need to wake up Roxie." We turned to face her bed. However, she was standing next to it in a pleated uniform skirt, a red tank top and Doc Martens while pulling her curly hair into a pony tail.

"Told you she was smarter than letting us pack all the clothes up," I said. Roxie smiled.

"Shall we?" she asked. Laughing, the three of us walked downstairs to breakfast. What we walked into, however, was more reminiscent of the Burrow on the last day of the Christmas Holidays when everyone is trying to get packed, but realises they've left all of their Christmas presents in the Den, but at the same time are supposed to be eating breakfast and as such, everyone is running wildly through the house throwing things at each other, some of which include waffles, rolls, and in one memorable case, a fried egg. Roxie walked in calmly, sat down and tucked into a plate of kippers on toast. Ly caught a blueberry muffin as it sailed towards her head, and I backhanded a scone away from myself on instinct. It smacked Fred in the face, leaving red raspberry filling on his otherwise dark skin.

"I've been hit!" he exclaimed dramatically, falling into a chair and eating the offending scone. I laughed and sat down next to Roxie. Sam and Will sat next to us. As one, we ducked the flying Care of Magical Creatures book belonging to James as it tried to dive bomb the tureen of cereal in the centre of the table. Apparently, so Uncle Ron says (which means the reliability of this statement is minimal), they once had a Care of Magical Creatures book that liked to bite you. Now we have ones that fly. I'm not sure which is worse.

James grabbed it out of the air and sat on it to prevent it from flying away again. Rose walked into the dining room and got brained with a muffin. Scor was at her side instantly asking if she was okay. She turned pink and nodded. They're sickening sometimes.

"I don't know whether they're sickeningly cute, sickeningly pathetic, or just plain sickening," I said to Roxie and Sam. They both choked on their various foods.

"All three," Roxie said.

"That's what I thought too," I said.

OOooOOooOOooOO

This big, burly sixth year paced in front of us, looking ready to disembowel someone with the Beater's bat he carried.

"Alright," he said. "If you're a first year, you can leave." A few scampered away. "Now, to the rest of you. We've got five spots on this team, and it's not going to be pretty." I glanced over at James, Fred and Ly who were huddled close to each other, as though nervous. These are the people who put gobstones in Filch's porridge at breakfast, scared of a sixth year.

"Those spots are all three Chasers, the Seeker and the second Beater," he said. He glared at me as he said Beater. It's true. I don't look like I should be a Beater. I look like I should be shopping in Paris, at least according to my mum. The whole, tall, skinny, blonde girl thing doesn't tend to make you think I'd carry a twenty pound bat around whacking at iron cannon balls. But I do. And I do it well. Dad, a Chaser, and Uncle George, a Beater, joked that somehow the wires had gotten crossed which is how I ended up playing Beater and Fred ended up Chaser. We're still not sure how that happened.

"Chasers over there," the sixth year said, gesturing to a slightly less muddy section of the pitch. "Seekers over there," he continued pointing to the other side. "Beaters, stay right here." Me and this weedy looking kid from fourth year stayed where we were while everyone else moved away. Ly was holding both James and Fred's hands in the Chaser's section. I rolled my eyes. In the Seekers section was no one I recognised particularly, although one of the boys looked like he could be from James and Fred's dorm.

The burly sixth year gave me and the other guy one last disparaging glance before stalking over to the Seekers. He muttered something to them and let go of the Snitch he was holding. The Seekers looked like horses frothing at the bit. Finally, he let them fly off and stalked over to the Chasers, where the one remaining member of his team was standing. I assume she plays Keeper. He explained something to them and then once they'd taken off he returned to us. He gave us both the once over and closed his eyes as though asking for patience.

"You," he said, pointing to the guy. "Why should you get to play Beater?"

"My uncle is a Beater for the Cannons," he said promptly. Both the sixth year and I turned and stared at him like he was insane.

"So he should put you on our Quidditch team?" I said incredulously. "But…we actually want to _win_ the Quidditch Cup." The guy looked like he wanted to beat me up. I took a step back.

"And why should you be on our Quidditch team?" the sixth year asked me.

"Well, because I can actually play Quidditch," I said.

"What? Did you take Quidditch lessons between ballet lessons?" the other guy asked me.

"No," I said. "I played Quidditch while getting in violent hitting matches with my male cousins." The guy looked taken aback. "Matches that I quite often won." The sixth year captain looked mildly impressed.

"How many cousins do you have?" he asked.

"I'm one of thirteen," I said. The captain considered.

"Well, I'm going to set up targets around the pitch for the two of you to hit at. Try to do your best. I don't want to have to go commando." He turned and flew off. At the same time, a series of targets floating between the other players showed up. I was in the air immediately. The guy followed behind me, looking around warily for the Bludgers. I swung my bat experimentally. It was lighter than the bat I had at home. Better for manoeuvrability, but worse for strength. This should be interesting. Up ahead, a Bludger was flying straight for James. Without thinking, I was there, swinging the Bludger away into one of the targets. The target vanished in a puff of red smoke. Then the Bludger came back. I batted it into another one of the targets. Now a rogue Seeker was flying directly at my head. I attempted to swerve out of his way, only to end up further in the way. What was it that Aunt Angelina, Uncle Harry and Uncle George would say and then shudder in relation to Quidditch? Sloth Grip Roll, right! I linked my ankles around my broom and rolled sideways off it as the Seeker flew directly where my head would have been a second before. I rolled back on as the Bludger tried to dive-bomb me. I zoomed forward to meet it, smashing it into one of the targets. When the smoke cleared, I saw that it was careening straight towards Ly, who had the Quaffle. I raced towards her, pulling to a neat stop next to her and smashed it in the other direction, not really aiming for anything. I heard a distant crunch and a howl of pain. Oh shit. I'm done for. I looked to see who I'd hit, only to discover it was the other guy trying out for Beater. The captain laughed at him.

"You don't have the job," he said. The guy looked murderous.

"You only picked her because she's a Veela!" he insisted. That does it.

I sped towards the two as they landed. I dropped my broom in the mud where I landed and advanced on the guy.

"Because I'm a Veela?" I asked in my deadly tone of voice. I was vaguely aware of some commotion going on in the stands. My grip tightened on my bat. My Uncle George's voice echoed through my head – "_Remember, when you're hitting something soft, keep your wrist firm_" – and I went to swing. Two sets of hands caught my wrists before I could impale the guy on my bat. On my right was the captain, on my left was Sam. When'd he get here? I noticed that behind him Roxie and Will were looking worried.

The guy looked terrified. "Well, you are, right?" he said. I bet even unexpectedly Sam and the captain could hold my weight. Time to test a theory. Without warning, I pushed off from the ground and kicked the guy in the nuts. His face turned red and he sank onto the mud holding himself. There was a collective wince of pain from all the guys around. My work here is done. I pulled my wrists out of their restraints.

"So when does practise start?" I asked the captain. He was staring at me in shock and awe.

"Tuesday," he choked out.

"Lovely," I said. I picked up my broom and the bat and walked over to where Roxie and Will were standing. Sam followed at a distance.

When forced to, Roxie had played Chaser at home (further adding to the mystery of how both Uncle George's kids had not gotten the Beater gene) so watching me play Quidditch was nothing new for her. Nor was watching me beat people up for calling me Veela. Both boys, however, looked disturbed on a deep level.

"Remind me to never, ever get on your bad side," Will said.

"Don't worry," I said. "You won't."

There were three sets of sloshing footsteps behind us. Ly, James and Fred ran to catch up.

"Did you make the team?" Ly asked. "Thanks for that save by the way, probably kept my neck from being broken."

"Of course I made the team," I said.

"Why, 'of course'?" Fred asked. I glanced across the rainy field and pointed at the mass of robes that had been my opponent.

"Because that was my competition," I said. James burst out laughing.

"He called you the V word, didn't he," he said.

"Yes, he did," I said.

"Stupid man," James said.

"I'm going to take from your chipper moods that the three of you made it as well," I said.

"Yes we did," Ly said.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"You guys know this is pointless, right?" Lucy asked from her bed where she was reading.

"What is?" Ly asked, grabbing a sock out of the pile. She dug for a while longer and then pulled out another one that matched. She balled them together and lobbed them at our closet. They landed in the sock tub perfectly. But, then again, she's a Chaser so that's to be expected.

"Attempting to organise your closet," Rose said, scribbling on her Charms homework or something else scholarly like that.

"No it's not," Roxie and I said in unison, both pulling on jeans legs. Eventually, the pile made way and it turned out we were holding opposite ends of the same pair. We were really all trying to find things to wear for the masquerade themed party in the Tower on Friday (a party that happened to coincide with my thirteenth birthday) but Lucy and Rose didn't need to know that. Organisation had merely become a by-product of the costume hunt. Something shimmery caught my eye at the bottom of the pile. I pulled it out. It was a silver sequins covered tube dress. Terrifying.

"Merlin," I said. "Which one of us owns that?" Roxie grabbed it and read the label.

"It's in French, so I'm going to guess it's yours," she said. "Since you're obviously disgusted by it, perhaps Lyra should wear it."

"Why me?" Ly asked, sounding as disturbed as I felt.

"Because it matches your mask," Roxie said.

"No it doesn-yes it does, doesn't it," she said, looking at the dress with renewed interest.

"Is that what you're really doing?" Rose asked. "Looking for dresses for the Masquerade on Friday?"

"Yeah," I said.

"Duh," Ly said. Roxie just gave her a look that said, "Wait, you really thought we were organising?"

"I don't understand why it's such a big deal," Lucy said. "I mean, you put on a dress and a mask and no one knows who you are."

"But there are boys there, Luce," Ly said. "Real boys."

"James," coughed Roxie. Ly threw the nearest tee shirt at her. She laughed.

"Maybe I should look for a dress," Rose said pensively, walking over to the closet she shared with Lucy.

"The world is going to hell in a hand basket," Lucy commented drily.

"Oh, hush," Ly said. "If Rose wants to get my brother to notice that she's a girl that's her prerogative."

"Hey!" Rose said, throwing something at Ly. It turned out to be a black dress.

"Where did you get that?" Lucy asked. Rose looked just as confused as we were. Ly handed the dress back. As she did, it caught the light and we realised it was actually navy, not black.

"Rose, that's perfect. If you don't wear that, I'll have to kill you so I can," Roxie said.

"It wouldn't fit you," Rose said. "And besides, it's from my mum."

"I like your mum when she's pregnant," I said, pulling on some swath of scarlet material. It turned out to be a fluffy strapless dress.

"Yeah, me too," Rose said. She held up the dress to herself in the mirror. It would obviously make her look more grown up. She seemed quite taken with it.

"Dom what do you have there?" Roxie asked. I tossed her the red dress. "Ooh! I like it! I think I'll wear it."

"It'll be lovely with your skin tone," a masculine voice said from the general area of the ceiling. In horror, the five of us looked up. James and Fred were wearing the trademark Weasley smirk and the WWW shoes that let you walk on the ceiling. James tapped his wand to the shoes and fell with a thump onto Ly's bed. He looked much too pleased with himself. Fred did the same, landing next to him.

"Why does it have to be my bed?" Ly asked.

"Because we're related to the rest of them, and that's just wrong," Fred said solemnly. James said nothing but turned pink.

"How long have you been up there?" I asked.

"About two minutes," Fred replied.

"You mean when that first year came in the wrong way up the stairs and opened the door thinking she was in the right dorm?" Roxie asked.

"Yeah, that's about right," James said. "So, I'm a 'real boy'?" he asked Ly.

"Well, according to your cousin," Ly said without missing a beat. "You'll note I just said 'real boy'. She added you to the equation." Roxie looked outraged. Her jaw dropped almost comically.

"That's it. That is so fucking it," she said, jumping up and grabbing her wand. She pointed it at James and her brother. "Out, both of you. Out." They didn't need telling twice and ran for the door. There was a loud klaxon like wail and they screamed. We paused for a moment and heard two thuds that meant they'd hit the common room floor. "And now we can find Dom a dress." Lucy was the first to start laughing.

"I just wanted to wear jeans, but nooooo," I muttered to myself. The dress they'd eventually found for me was some crazy turquoise halter dress with ruffles on the hem and little circular mirrors built into it. I looked like a disco ball. They'd also managed to cajole me (for "cajole" read "held at wand point") into the matching platform sandals. I think the outfit had originally been Ly's, but I'm not sure. We're never really sure anymore. My mask had at one point in its life been black. Now, however, it was covered in turquoise glitter glue and circular silver sequins. I crossed my arms defiantly over my chest and stalked down the stairs in distaste. It had taken me the least amount of time to get ready due to my lack of long hair. It only came down to my chin and there was nothing I could really do to it. I'd been sitting at our couch in the common room for five minutes now, alone, waiting for all of my stupid friends. Finally, Lucy appeared. She had her hair tucked behind her ears and was wearing a black sundress with (lucky girl) flats. The heels brigade hadn't gotten to her. Nothing ever gets to her. She sat down next to me.

"I think you look very pretty," she told me.

"Thanks Luce," I said. "So do you." She shrugged.

"No! I've changed my mind! I don't want to go!" said a guy's voice from behind us. We looked around. Dylan, dressed ever so suavely as what I'm going to assume is James Bond, along with Fred who seemed to be dressed like a lion (head dress and all) were dragging someone down the stairs. The kicking and screaming guy had blond hair. He was also dressed as a pirate.

From the girls' dormitories, a similar event was taking place, except it was Roxie and Ly dragging Rose down the stairs. Lucy and I exchanged looks. Rox looked fabulous in the red dress with one big red flower in her hair and Ly sparkled more than I did in the light. Rose looked great in the midnight blue dress her mum had bought her. The heels brigade had gotten to Rose. I'm starting to wonder just how Lucy avoided capture.

Both of Rose and Scorpius's chauffeurs were watching where they were going and knew they were on a collision course. Rose and Scorpius did not.

"Let go of me!" Rose finally exclaimed, shoving off against Roxie and turning around in time to run full on into Scor. In a move worthy of Ly and James, they landed in a pile of limbs on the floor.

"Holy Merlin! For once I'm not part of the human dog pile!" James said, bounding excitedly down the stairs.

"Wait for it…" Fred said.

"Hi, James," Ly said. James's face went slack and he tripped over a rug into an arm chair and slid gracelessly to the floor.

"Murphy's Law, everybody!" Fred said, raising a triumphant fist in the air. "Round of applause? No? Okay." Ly rushed to help James up.

"Which means we're just down to Al, Sam and Will," Dylan said. "Oh, god, we'll be here all night. I'll be right back." He turned and ran up the stairs.

Oh this is going to be a fun night.

**Review, you know you want to. And even if you didn't before, you do now because I just inceptioned your brain. Ha. **


	7. 7: Will

**A/N: Chapter seven. Yeah. Seven. I think I published this on Tuesday? I don't remember. Anyways, it's Thursday and this is chapter seven. So, yeah. To everyone who keeps reading and reviewing, I love you guys. All of you. **

**Chapter 7: Will**

I always knew Dylan was annoying, but, really. Really?

"Oh yeah, guys, we'll go to the masquerade ball it'll be awesome!" he'd said.

"Masquerade?" Scor had asked.

"Ball?" Sam had asked.

"We?" Al had asked.

"Go to?" I'd asked.

In retrospect, our voices had gotten progressively higher pitched, culminating in a spectacular knack jump on my part.

"Yeah!" Dylan had said, nodding excitedly. I'd felt my terror mirrored by my dorm mates.

However, Dylan's enthusiasm meant we were going. End of story, good bye, sayonara, end of conversation. Period.

Which is why Friday the eighth of October found us sitting awkwardly in our room. Scor had been dressed as a pirate by Dylan. Al was supposed to be some swashbuckling fellow named Zorro, Dylan himself was some kind of Muggle character who carried a gun and a "licence to kill" (I'm still confused), which left me and Sam to our own devices. I'd heard Dom complaining about something she called the "heels brigade" and figured Dylan was our equivalent. I'm only too glad to have escaped.

About twenty minutes before eight (when the Masquerade was supposed to start), Fred showed up in our dormitory wearing a pair of yellow dress robes and a lion's mask.

"Dylan, the girls are in the process of coming down the stairs," he said, raising significant eyebrows in Scor's direction. Dylan nodded and as one they grabbed him by the shoulders and the elbows and frogmarched him out of the room.

"That poor, sorry bastard," I said.

"I think they're trying to set him and Rose up," Sam said. Al and I turned to stare at him. "What?"

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Al said. "And they're doing that well enough on their own."

"It's like everyone's pairing off," Sam said.

"Not everyone. Just Rose and Scor and Ly and James," I said.

"Which is why Dylan's been hanging out with us more, right?" Sam said.

"Yes," I said. The guy may be my best friend, but sometimes, you have to give him the full breakdown of what exactly is going on. Otherwise, he tends to stare at life with this blank expression that makes him seem like an idiot. I've been told I do this as well, but not to the same extent.

The door burst open. "You're not even in costume!" Dylan yelled, causing all three of us to jump about a foot in the air and drop everything we were holding. This meant my Transfiguration notebook ended up somewhere in the general melee of my bedclothes (never finding that again), Al dropped his trousers and Sam dropped what appeared to be half a ton of whirring devices into Dylan's bed. They quickly scuttled away and disappeared. I raised my eyebrow at him. He turned pink but said nothing.

"Is it really a costume thing? Or is it more of a 'dress nicely and put on a mask' thing?" I asked. Dylan sighed as though I were putting the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"Traditionally, it's a costume party, made by having the costume. But since you're all boring, it's more of a 'wear something nice' party," he said. "Come on. It's our first time getting invited to the Tower and you really want to go in-in that?"

I looked down at what I was wearing. Uniform pants and a black shirt.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" I asked.

"There's no pizazz!" Dylan insisted. He grabbed his wand. I backed away in horror.

"No sequins. None!" I said, suddenly panicked. He grinned evilly and there was a bang followed by a puff of smoke and then something was strangling me. I chocked and grabbed at my neck. I realised that I was now wearing a bow tie. In horror, I looked in the bathroom mirror. I was wearing a red and black bow tie (a very sparkly one), a waistcoat with all the suits of a deck of cards on it, and tails. Like, coattails. And a top hat with an oversized Queen of Hearts card coming out of it. I was also wearing a mask made out of two cards.

"What am I?" I asked. "The Gambler?"

"No, I was more thinking, 'random extra in the court of the Queen of Hearts'," Dylan said brightly.

"Like, Alice in Wonderland?" Sam asked.

"Yeah," Dylan said. He seemed much too pleased with himself. I reached into my pocket for my wand, only to find it replaced with a deck of cards.

"Where is my wand?" I asked. Dylan shrugged innocently. "Dylan, so help me Merlin, if you don't give me back my wand, I will personally make sure you never sleep in this school again." He looked somewhat terrified and handed me my wand back. I used it to pull off the hat, get rid of the card embellishments on the waistcoat, and turn the mask into a normal black mask.

"Fine," Dylan said grumpily. I glared at him. Sam panicked at that point. He doesn't do well when he panics.

"Don't change my clothes!" he shrieked, running out of the room and down the stairs.

"You've got that?" Dylan asked me.

"Yeah," I said, following him out. He'd just hit the common room when I caught up to him. He tripped into someone and sent them flying. It turned out to be James.

"Do I actually have the option of standing at some point in my life?" James yelled. The group around him laughed.

"Miss anything good?" I asked no one in particular.

"Rose and Scor pulled a James and Ly, James then proceeded to trip into the chair and fall on his arse, at which point he was trying to stand up, but then Sam came running in like the Devil was after him and now we're having this conversation," Roxie said. At least, I assume its Roxie. She was wearing a short red dress and a red eye mask with feathers coming off to either side, and strappy red torture devices that were probably some form of shoe. She looked great.

"Wow, Roxie," I said. "You look great."

"You sound surprised, Will," she said. How do you answer that? Do you say, "No, of course I'm not surprised, you're gorgeous" and reveal your true colours, or do you say, "Well yeah. It's not like you ever dress up" and get smacked?

"You just never dress up, is all," I finally decided.

"Fair enough," she said. Crisis averted. Thank Merlin.

And then I looked to see if Sam had gotten himself into trouble. He was staring slack jawed at Dom. Meaning he was about to be in trouble. Although, in his defence, she did look, well, hot. Even though she still looked pissed off, because, well, she's Dom.

"Sam knows he's drooling, right?" Lucy asked.

"I doubt it," I said. This should be a fun night.

"Welcome to the Tower," said a woman's voice when we got there. This was only strange because there was no one there. In fact, there was nothing there. Just some tapestry of some shmuck trying to teach trolls to do the ballet. Before any of us could comment that James and Fred had truly lost it and we were in the wrong place, two doors sprang into being in front of us. They pushed them open to welcome us into the Tower. The Tower is kind of a Hogwarts legend when you're a first year. Supposedly, it used to be a room that could become anything you wanted it to be, but it got destroyed in the Great War. It stayed destroyed until these three students got together and found it and somewhat fixed it. As all three were Gryffindor students, it was decided that the Tower was technically Gryffindor territory. However, it's also _the_ party spot in Hogwarts. Everyone is welcome to the crazy parties. Well, everyone over third year, unless you've got an invitation. Or an in.

We happened to have both.

As one, we stepped over the threshold into madness. And when I say madness, I mean, ball gowns, costumes, skimpy dresses, loud music, hazy atmosphere and some form of nineteenth century decoration theme that seemed to fit with the masquerade theme. There were even balconies, with the occasional person swinging between them on what looked like gigantic curtain ties. Usually, these people would land on the balconies with a graceful thud and be applauded. However, as we watched, one swung into the banister of a balcony and fell onto the group of people just below him. He was caught by raised hands and the small area turned into the equivalent of a mosh pit from a rock concert, wherein he was crowd surfed to the centre of the room and then dropped.

How the teachers don't know about this place is beyond me.

"Your invitations, second years?" asked a voice from just inside the door, which had now swung closed. The guy was wearing an open old fashioned shirt and looked like he'd just stepped out of a period film about Casanova or something. He even had the crazy leather Venetian mask. He was also carrying a goblet and I believe he may have been –

"I think he's shitfaced," Roxie said.

"Yeah," I agreed. James and Fred had disappeared into the crowd, Ly with them. Dylan glanced around surreptitiously and shoved Rose and Scor into each other and then into the dancing crowd. They promptly disappeared. That left me, Sam, Al, Dylan, Roxie, Dom and Lucy to explain our presence. This would've been so much easier if Ly were here.

"Well, I don't need an invitation," Roxie said to the guy. He looked confused. She pointed above the door. Three names were carved into the stone: Teddy Lupin, Victoire Weasley, Jake Wood. The three legendary students who had restored the place. "I'm a Weasley." The guy's eyes went unfocused for a second.

"So am I," Lucy said.

"Me too," Al said. Dom said nothing, and was instead staring at the guy like he'd gone insane.

"What about you?" he asked, turning to Dylan.

"I'm here by invitation of a Weasley," he said. "Automatic immunity." The guy nodded and Dylan also disappeared into the crowd.

"So am I," I said. "Invitation by Weasley, that is." The guy looked disappointed, like he wanted to throw someone out.

"I am too," Sam said.

"I was going to have fun throwing you out, too!" the guy said. He heaved a sigh like the world was on his shoulders. "It'd make it better if yon pretty lady would grant me the honour of a dance," he said, offering Dom his hand. She looked from the hand back to its owner a couple of times and then stormed across the five foot gap between them and pulled off his mask. A sixth year that I'm pretty sure is Gryffindor Quidditch captain was revealed. She pulled her mask off as well. His eyes went wide.

"Dom?" he asked.

"Liam," she said. He seemed to be sober instantly.

"Monday would have been very awkward, had you said yes," he said.

"Which I wouldn't have," she said. He shook his head as though to clear it of bizarre thoughts.

"I'm gonna go wash my brain out with billywig juice. Excuse me," he said, before pulling his mask back on and disappearing.

"What was that about?" Al asked.

"That was my Quidditch captain, being drunk and hitting on me," Dom said. "He's also my partner, as we're both Beaters. We have practise on Monday that would've been made very awkward by us dancing together."

"Still think you should've," Roxie said.

"No one asked you, Rox," Dom said. "And if you think he's so smashing, you can go dance with him."

"Let's see what's wrong with that…first, I dunno, I'm twelve, he's sixteen," she said. "Whereas, you're thirteen." Dom fixed her a glare that would've killed someone lesser, like, I dunno, me.

"So!" I said, more to break the tension than anything. "What do you guys want to do? We could always…hide in one of the balconies until we can logically escape."

"We could get piss raging drunk," Roxie said. I so like my plan better.

"And end up like Liam? No thanks," Dom said.

"We could dance," Roxie said.

"Okay," Dom said, shrugging. "Come on, Sammy." Sam gave me his panicked look. That's not going to be good. But it was too late to take action as she'd already dragged him off into the dance floor.

"I think I like Will's plan," Lucy said. "Al?"

"I'm with you," he said.

"Yeah, I think I am too!" I said, making to follow them. Someone caught me by the suspender strap I didn't know I was wearing.

"Oh no you don't," Roxie said. "I'm not dancing by myself." Well, hell.

I was then dragged into the dance floor. A few feet away, I could see Rose and Scor "dancing" together. For dancing, read "awkward shuffling with much stepping on of feet and kicking of shins."

A few feet away from them, Ly and James were dancing exuberantly to the extent a circle had formed around them to watch. They were really quite good. I couldn't see Dom and Sam anywhere, so I couldn't contrive a way to save his arse. Knowing him, he'd end up babbling something about liking her and she'd never talk to him again.

"I worry about Sam," I said.

"Don't we all," Roxie said, taking my hand. I swallowed nervously, probably looking as panicked as Sam had. She then placed my other hand on her waist. I willed myself not to start sweating up a storm and then pass out. She put her other hand on my shoulder and we swayed awkwardly to the fast beat. Of course, the moment we did, the song was over and a slow song started playing. I turned pink and went to run away, but she didn't let go. Now we were swaying in time to the slow music.

I think I may like Roxie.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"And then she put her hand on my arm," Sam related, seeming in shock. "But then that sixth year, Liam Wood, came back and offered us both drinks. And she took one, but I didn't. At first. But then I did. And that Frank guy from James and Fred's dorm came by and dropped something in my drink. Then the room was underwater, and I had to swim to the door, and when I looked back, Dom was still with that Liam Wood guy. I didn't see her after I got outside of the room, but that's because I was here then. I still don't know how I swam all that way. How did you swim all that way?"

"You're not underwater, Sam," Al repeated for the eighth time. This is the eighth retelling of this story we've heard since we all got back to the dorm. Dylan passed out almost immediately after a few quick bursts of hysteric laughter. Scor had a stupid grin on his face that wouldn't go away. Al looked incredibly Zen, probably due to the fact he'd been slipped Firewhiskey by Lucy, who seemed to have been trying to see what the effect would be if she slipped him small amounts over the course of the night. He was sitting up in bed and staring stonily at the opposite wall as though he was having a staring match with it. He would occasionally point out reality to all of us. Sam, as has been previously mentioned, seemed to be both drunk and drugged, while I think I may have been wearing a similar facial expression to Scor, which disturbed me more than the rest of them combined.

"Scor, staring at your bed curtains will not make them into Rose," Al said. "Will, the same goes for you, except with Roxie."

"I don't want my bed curtains to turn into Roxie!" I insisted.

"Sure you don't," he said.

"I don't!" I insisted. Well, not really, anyways. If they did, it would just be awkward. That would never come out of my head and forever, I'd just be lying in bed, freaking out because Roxie could be watching me. Great. It's not going to go away now.

"What about you, Scor?" I asked. "You get spiked or drugged?"

"Nope," he said, with much too much enthusiasm for life. The whole idea of Roxie turning into my bed curtains and watching me sleep had me freaked out now.

"Just danced with Rose?" I asked.

"Yep," he said.

"But…" Sam said. "Why's the water draining? Where's it going?"

"Sam," I said. "You've been drugged. You are not underwater, you never were. Except perhaps when you were a small child and went swimming with your family."

"But…it's all gone," he said.

"Good," I said.

"Oh, god, my head," he said, seeming to fall backward into a ball. He didn't move again, but I heard him snoring, so I figured he was okay.

"What about you, Al? Ready for your first hangover?" I asked. There was no response. I looked over. Al had fallen from his sitting straight up position into a perfectly prone plank of a person on his bed. He also snored. "Scor?" I asked. No reply. So it's just me. Fun.

Sleepily, I pulled off my mask and kicked off my shoes before crawling into my bed and promptly passing out.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"You're going to miss breakfast!" shouted a shrill voice. There were three cries of pain from around the room. I blinked sleepily. But I didn't comprehend what I was seeing. There was an angel in the doorway. She was a brunette with her hair blowing behind her, sunlight framing her from behind and she was stunningly beautiful. She crossed the room until she was staring me in the face. She had blue eyes. And tan skin. She looked like Roxie.

_Which_, the rational part of my brain said, _is because she _is_ Roxie._

"Will," she said, patting me lightly in the face. I twitched awake.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"Because you're going to miss breakfast," she said. "All of you are."

"Why aren't James and Fred waking us up like they normally do?" I asked, climbing out of bed.

"Erm…they're next on the list for waking," Roxie said.

"Why are you the one waking us up?" I asked. Normally, so far as I understand the girls I'm friends with, Ly would be the one they'd send to wake us up. At the Malfoys' house, their house elf wakes us up, but sometimes Ly does it just for fun.

"Because Lucy's out of commission, Rose is already down at the Great Hall saving the lot of us seats, Ly is hopefully with James and Fred and we don't exactly know where Dom is," she summed up. "Which leaves me."

"Oh," I said intelligently. I dug in my trunk and found a pair of jeans that were only mildly covered in magical mulch (the stuff that accumulates at the bottom of Hogwarts trunks) and a tee shirt. "I'll be right back," I said, ducking into the bathroom to change. I peeled off the suspenders and then pulled off the shirt before pulling on my tee shirt. I'd just stepped out of my trousers to pull on my jeans when the bathroom door burst open. Dylan barrelled past me and went straight to the toilet to throw up. I quickly pulled on my jeans and left the room. Scor was sitting up in bed looking discombobulated, but not so much as Sam, who looked genuinely disturbed by life. Well, more so than usual that is. Al was still stony faced and glaring at the wall again.

"Come on boys," Roxie said, clapping like we were puppy dogs. "Let's go wake up James." I stepped into shoes that were probably mine and followed her down the stairs to James and Fred's dorm. Roxie pushed open the door. Fred was lying sideways across his bed. I only knew it was him because I could see his head coming out from between the curtains. Roxie smiled and danced across the room to her brother, who she promptly smacked in the face. He screamed bloody murder and sat bolt upright. He got a face full of curtain in the process.

"Is that normal?" I asked, genuinely concerned.

"Eh. Normal enough," Roxie said. "This is my brother we're talking about. But, yes, that has always been his reaction to my waking him up."

"Fair enough," I said. She walked over to another bed. She pulled back the curtains. Ly was sleeping there quite peacefully. No James in sight.

"Lyra," Roxie said. Ly woke up immediately.

"This is not the girls' dormitory," she said.

"No," Roxie said. "Figured you might want these," she added, throwing a pair of jeans, a zip up sweatshirt and a shirt of some form in her direction.

"How do you know what she'd want to wear?" I asked, being reminded eerily of Dylan. "You just…go through each other's clothes?"

"No," she said. "Dom, Ly and I don't actually know whose clothes are whose, so we all share." I stared at her in confusion. "It's a girl thing."

"Oh," I said. "So, where's James?" She seemed to consider for a moment, before walking back to her brother's bed and pulling open the curtains. In addition to Fred, who was now sitting up and rubbing his eyes, was James, curled in a ball on top of the pillows.

"They did this all the time when they were kids. Like, even in their cribs apparently. James would always get the pillows and Fred would end up with his head and feet hanging off the sides," Roxie said. "You will both miss breakfast if you don't get up now," she said to the two. They both looked terrified and were out of bed instantly. Ly joined us shortly.

"Anyone heard from Dom?" Roxie asked them as the five of us headed down for breakfast.

"No," Ly said. "Last I saw, she was dancing with Liam."

"According to Sam she was also drinking," I said. "But, Sam also thought he was underwater, so he's probably not the most reliable of sources."

By this point, we'd reached the Great Hall. Rose waved us down from halfway down the Gryffindor table. We went to join her. I noticed as we walked along that at least half the house looked pasty, tired and slightly hung over.

Rose looked chipper as usual, as did Scorpius, although they kept glancing at each other and then blushing furiously. Sam had his head in his bowl of cereal, Dylan was asleep on Al's shoulder. Al was trying to eat his toast without disturbing Dylan's sleep. Dom was sitting next to Rose staring deeply into a mug of black coffee while Lucy sat next to them looking green. It appeared that in addition to slipping Al alcohol, she'd been drinking some herself. Ly sat down next to Rose and helped herself to her brother's breakfast as he was too busy avoiding making eye contact with Rose to notice. James sat down on her other side and also tucked into Scor's breakfast, as, apparently to distract himself from Rose, he'd piled on about eight slices of toast, a Matterhorn of scrambled eggs, a large number of kippers, and three separate bowls of cereal. Roxie sat next to Lucy and I sat next to her, leaving Fred to sit with the boys who were also nursing hangovers. Lucy and Dom seemed to be the only two on our side who had drunken anything. Scor was the only one on his side who hadn't.

About twenty minutes into the breakfast, Scor stood up.

"I've got to go study for Herbology. Rose, would you like to come with me?" he asked. Rose turned red and mumbled something that sounded like 'sure.' They stood up and walked away.

"James, do you want to help me with my Potions homework?" Ly asked.

"Yes, yes I do," he said.

"Great, let's go," she said, grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the hall. Fred watched them go, looking bitter.

"Anyone need help with Transfiguration?" I asked.

"Yeah," Roxie said.

"Me too," Dylan said, speaking for the first time.

"Probably," Al said.

"Definitely," Lucy said.

"Anyone have some sugar mice?" Dom asked.

"Yeah," Lucy said, pulling a box of them out of her pocket. She handed it to Dom. Dom pulled one out by its tail and dropped it into her coffee. It dissolved quickly, coming to a fast end. Dom stirred the mug and took a drink.

"That's better," she said. "And yes, I need help with Transfiguration."

"What about Charms?" I asked. There was a sucking noise as Sam sat up and pulled his face out of his bowl.

"I'll help with Charms," he said.

"That's the idea," I said.

"Oh, then, yeah. Who wants help with Charms?" he asked.

"Depends," Dylan muttered. "Are you going to Charm a bunch of bowtruckles to bite me every time I try to fall asleep?"

"No," Sam said. "Why would I do that?"

"Well, you never know, so I was just checking," he said. Sam looked so pathetically confused. I glanced sideways at Roxie. We made eye contact, after which I'm positive I turned pink.

Yeah this is going to go great, this whole liking Roxie thing.

Just peachy.

**Review. You know you want to. **


	8. 8: Fred

**A/N: Hi there. How's it going? Cool. So, if anyone is familiar with the play Dog Sees God, or the movie Easy A, the guy who wrote both of them seems to have this penchant for making something really funny at the beginning and then partway through something terrible happens and the whole thing changes. Uh...yeah. I think I did that with this story, just so you're prepared. **

**This is only the beginning of bad shit. Just so you know. It's not really bad yet. Not really. **

**Chapter 8: Fred**

I think I finally figured out what's wrong with me.

I'm jealous.

I'm jealous of my best friend.

This is not a good place to be.

Why am I jealous?

Because he's the type of guy to get the girl. The girl we both want.

Because James is the hero type, you know? Son of a hero who was the son of a hero who was probably the son of a fucking hero.

Not like me.

Me? I'm the son of a guy who created a pranking empire, who's the son of a guy who happily worked in an office the size of a broom closet for thirty years until James's dad swept into the Ministry and fixed him up with something proper.

Guys like me? We don't get the girl. We don't get the fame and the fortune and the glory. People don't point at us as we walk down the halls and say, "look, its Harry Potter's son!"

People point at me and say, "Look its Fred Weasley! Everyone still got their spare change and pocketbooks?"

I've only stolen one thing in my entire life, but because of my father, I'm automatically a vagrant thief. I don't know where they got thief from. Troublemaker, yeah sure, but not thief.

James has been my best friend since he was two days old and I've been living in his shadow for going on three years now. It was fine before we started school. Just fine. But then we started school and the pointing started.

I got my fair share of it at first because I'm a Weasley, but then that sort of died down.

Now they don't even bother pointing me out.

It's not that I want to be popular, I mean, technically, I suppose I am. I just want to be recognised.

I have to wonder how Uncle Ron felt at Hogwarts. Back then, we Weasleys weren't even worthy of note. Head of the family stuck in a broom closet at the Ministry, no other claims to fame except my dad and his twin, my namesake, who were the biggest troublemakers Hogwarts had seen since (you guessed it) James's grandpa. And then Uncle Ron, the youngest guy who also happened to be friends with Harry Potter. In the flesh.

He wasn't the "get the girl" type either.

And a lot of the time, I bet he felt exactly like me.

I bet he had to endure the endless nights of waiting for your two best friends to come out of the corner they were cloistered in working on plans for something just so you could go down to dinner. I dunno what James and Ly are working on, but it's not school work.

"Can we go yet?" I asked moodily from my arm chair.

"What?" James asked. "Oh, yeah, dinner. Hang on just one second." He scribbled something on a sheet of paper and blew on the ink to dry it. Ly stared at it in apparent shock.

"Oh holy Merlin," she said. "James, you've done it! You've finished it!"

"Well, I couldn't have done it without you," he said sappily, staring at her in Bambi-eyed adoration. I tried not to gag.

"Well, no, obviously it was a team effort, but…but we did it!" she exclaimed. I gritted my teeth and threw the Quaffle I was holding up into the air again.

"We're going to miss dinner entirely and then be late for practise," I said grumpily.

"Oh, right!" Ly said. She laughed. "Come on!" she said, grabbing the parchment and James's hand and dragging him out the Portrait hole. I closed my eyes briefly in order to try to put up the "That Fred Weasley, he's a funny son of a bitch" façade I wore.

I grabbed the Quaffle and leaped out the Portrait hole after them.

"Oi!" I exclaimed. "Wait up!" I jogged to catch up with them. They paused.

"Sorry, Freddie," Ly said.

"You mean Freodrick Frankenstein," James said in a pompous accent.

"Of course, _I_gor," she replied. Here we go with Young Frankenstein references.

"Call it a hunch, barum chi," James continued, pointing at his shoulder.

I do genuinely like that movie.

I don't particularly like re-enacting it in public.

We reached the Great Hall and were immediately beckoned by Wood who seemed to think that all dinner pre or post Quidditch practice was the perfect time for a team meeting.

We sat down in bad grace at the end of the table he'd commandeered.

Dom was routinely avoiding looking at him. This is the first time they've interacted since the masquerade, and when I say they interacted at the masquerade, boy do I mean interacted.

There was a lot of drunken snogging.

A lot.

Jack O'Brien, Seeker, was snickering at the two of them. He was alone in the team for having attended the masquerade and managing to not drink a single drop of alcohol.

Larry Townsend, my dorm mate Tommy's older brother and Keeper for the team, still looked hung over.

"Alright," Wood said. "Now that our Chasers have decided to grace us with their presence," cue pointed glares in our direction, "we can start. Frankly, you've all been sloppy and uncoordinated since September and our first game is next month."

"Exactly. It's next month," Ly said. "We've got time." Wood's eyes bugged out.

"Time? Not if we want to win against Hufflepuff!" Wood said.

"Liam, not so passionate. My head's about to explode anyways," Larry said. Yes, definitely still hung over.

"Well, he'd know all about passionate, wouldn't he?" Jack said. He's enjoying this way too much.

"Jack, do you want a Beater's bat up your arse?" Dom asked him. Disturbingly, Jack considered for a moment before replying.

"Not really," he said. "But is it true what they say about Beaters?"

"What do they say about Beaters?" Dom asked. Jack doesn't apparently realise that he's about to be murdered.

"People can we please focus?" Wood asked. He was ignored, an unprecedented event in Quidditch history.

"That they're really," Jack said, drawing out "really" into a word with four e's and five l's. "Good," he added. "At…" Dom was leaning across the table at this point, ready to grab him by the hair and smash his face into the table. "Hitting Bludgers." He burst into laughter. She sat back down looking pissed. He's a smarmy git for a fourth year, let me just say that.

"Of course we are, that's why we do what we do," Wood said. Jack opened his mouth to say something else.

"Just let it go," Larry advised. Larry, unlike Jack, has to put up with Wood when he's in a foul mood since they're dorm mates.

"So, back to your being sloppy," Wood said. "I will not tolerate any fumbling of throws into the goal posts, or of any shoddy blocking." He glared pointedly at Larry, who yawned and poured more gravy onto his mashed potatoes.

"Got it," I said. "Can we go practise now?"

OOooOOooOOooOO

"So what exactly have you perfected?" I asked. I was being lead into an abandoned classroom by James and Ly who were eager to show me something. There was a bubbling cauldron set up in the corner and all the desks appeared to be covered in magical graffiti.

"Last desk on the left," Ly said, pointing to it. I walked over. It had what had been a game of hangman on it. There was a little swinging figure outlined in a shimmering red ink that seemed to be changing colour as I watched. The clue underneath looked like "_ a m _ _/ _ _ /a _/ _ _ _ _ t."

"James is an idiot, yes we know that one," I said, as it was clearly Ly's handwriting filling in the letters.

"Is that what the answer was?" James asked, staring at it. "Damn!"

"But try to clean it up," Ly encouraged. I looked back at the desk, only to discover the writing was now green.

"It changed colour," I said.

"Yeah," James said.

"_Scourgify_," I said, pointing my wand at the desk. All the dust disappeared but the text stayed on. That's weird.

"Vanishing Charm won't work either," James said. "Nor will soap or water, or even an eraser."

"Someone made permanent ink?" I asked. "Like, truly permanent?"

"Yes we did," Ly said.

"You guys made permanent ink? Colour changing permanent ink?" I asked in disbelief.

"We think we're going to patent it through your dad," she said. I blinked in shock.

"But, what are you going to call it?" I asked.

"Everlast Colour Change Ink," James answered promptly.

"Is this what you've been working on all year?" I asked.

"Yeah," they replied sheepishly.

"That's amazing," I said.

"Yeah," Ly said. "We're on our way to owl your dad and thought we'd tell you first." Oh, how considerate. Tell me way after the fact.

"We haven't shown it to anyone before," James said. "It's nice to know someone appreciates it."

Yes, I'm here just to bask in your light.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"So when I give the signal, you guys do your part, I do mine," Ly said. "Are we clear?"

"Yeah," James and I said in unison.

"And then we run like hell so Filch doesn't catch us," James added.

"So very true," I said.

"Okay," Ly said. "Let's rock."

We split up. I headed for the third floor corridor, portable swamp in tow.

Ly headed for the far side of the corridor near all the suits of armour.

James went to get the tiki torches.

About ten minutes later there was a shrill whistle. The signal. I pulled the portable swamp out of my pocket and pulled the drawstring. It inflated.

I have to hand it to my dad. The swamp was complete with old oak trees with Spanish moss and everything. As it expanded over my feet, it was nice to discover that our modifications worked. I took off at a run. I got to the far side of the swamp in time to see Ly dive behind a tapestry. I followed. We were in a narrow corridor. There were running footsteps outside.

"Come back here, Potter!" Filch yelled. Ly and I exchanged horrified looks. Ever so cautiously, we peeked out in time to see James sprint by followed by Filch. At the last second, James turned right down the next corridor and disappeared from our line of sight.

"Oh no! He's going to get caught!" Ly exclaimed.

Maybe whoever runs the universe will take pity on me.

I ducked out from behind the tapestry.

"Oi! Filch!" I yelled. The creaky, cranky caretaker turned on his heel, his horrible ancient cat coughing up a hairball at me. "Yeah! Hi!" I exclaimed before turning and sprinting away from the place Ly was hidden. Then the bell rang and the first years were out of their classes. Instantly they stepped into the swamp. The screams filled the air, and were promptly drowned out by the clanking of metal. I made the mistake of pausing to admire our handy work as the platoons of tiki torch carrying suits of armour jogged into the mire and picked up a first year a piece before jogging back out. Filch watched in shock and horror until he realised I was now standing still.

"Weasley!" he yelled.

"Ah, shit," I said, trying to run, but losing time by having to avoid the suits of armour. I thought I'd escaped until a bony hand closed on the scruff of my neck and started dragging me down the hall.

All I know is that James had better have gotten himself free from harm or this wasn't worth it.

"Detention," Filch said, his eyes going buggy per usual. I don't actually have to be looking at him anymore to know when his eyes are buggy. That's how often I'm in trouble.

He dragged me down the hall towards his office. I chanced a glance at the tapestry on our way past. Ly was peering out from the wall nervously as James appeared in the tunnel behind her.

Time seemed to slow down as she threw her arms around him for longer than was strictly necessary and kissed him on the cheek. Then the tapestry fell shut and I felt time speed up again.

I save his ass and she kisses him? Yeah, loving life over here in my little corner of hell.

**Read and review!**


	9. 9: Lucy

**A/N: Well, less dramatic than the last chapter, although that was more of the beginning of a hint of what's to come, rather like the tiny sprig of arrugula in a salad when there's going to be roasted vegetables with arrugula dressing later in the meal. That's a bizarre analogy isn't it? Huh...**

**Anyways!**

**Chapter 9: Lucy**

Second year was over. Finally. The year that dragged on forever and ever. It was terrible.

First, there was the Tower Masquerade, at which I got drunk and therefore couldn't stop my family from doing so, leading to bad decision making on Dom's part (I mean, who makes out with their Quidditch captain? Drunk or sober, really…), Sam getting both drunk and drugged (Who is this Frank guy? Why does he do these things?), Dylan, well, we're still not one hundred per cent sure what happened to Dylan that night, Fred getting smashingly drunk, me getting Al drunk, and Will and Roxie falling in love.

All this in one night.

Then, there was the Quidditch event of the century where Gryffindor took the Cup, hands down because Dom smashed a Bludger into the other Keeper, making it possible for James, Ly and Fred to score.

At the same time, Fred got detention for the rest of the year because of the Portable Swamp they set up in the third floor corridor that affected only the first years, who had to be carried across it by suits of armour, which were also carrying tiki torches. Ly and James got off scot free. They also managed to patent their Everlast Colour Change Ink through the WWW. I don't think Fred was too happy about any of that. I think that he may be quite bitter underneath it all. Which would be sad, especially given his father is my favourite uncle. For the longest time, he was Dad's biggest hater, and then he became his biggest fan when the war was over. Apparently he and Uncle Fred threw mashed turnip at Dad when he came home for Christmas for work related reasons. I hear Aunt Ginny helped as well. But then when Uncle Fred died, Dad felt super guilty about it, and Uncle George was the one who told him not to be and they kind of became friends.

And finals were kind of terrible this year too, but that was okay because I had Sam to help me with Charms, and Will to help with Transfiguration, and Ly to help with Potions and Dylan to keep us all from dying of boredom.

But, now it was the summer holidays, and the first two weeks belonged to the Weasley family reunion. For everyone between the ages of 10 and 25, this is hell. The majority of us would much rather be off at our friends' houses, or in the majority rule, one friend's house in particular. Will and Dylan and Sam get to just go straight there, but no. We have to come here for two weeks. To the ancestral family home, the Burrow.

There are now three screaming babies and a very pregnant Victoire to contend with in addition to the normal chaos.

By very pregnant, I mean due any day now. Teddy has supposedly been following her around with an overnight bag for three weeks, ready to whisk her off to Mungo's the minute she goes into labour.

Then there's Alexander Weasley, Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron's new kid, he's five months old. And also, Katie Weasley, Aunt Angelina and Uncle George's new kid. She's three months old. And last but not least, my new baby sister, Susan, who's only two months old. I don't think anyone really envies us.

"Troops, there's been a change in plans," Uncle George said the minute we stepped off the train. He seemed genuinely excited by life, probably something to do with his new kid.

"There has?" James repeated, glancing over towards Ly where she was standing with Scor, Dylan, Will and Sam.

"There has. See, we've already discussed this as adults and figured dragging all of you off to Romania for the summer would not be the kind thing to do," George said.

"No it wouldn't," Dom said.

"However, all of us are going," he continued.

"You are?" Fred asked.

"Your Uncle Charlie is getting married. However, his fiancé refuses to leave her native country, which is why none of us have seen him in thirteen years, blah blah blah, you get the picture," George said. "So, anyways, as you'll have been aware, she was pregnant, but now she's had said child and in an entirely uncharacteristic move, he's decided to make an honest woman of her, and we're all going over for the wedding and staying the summer. This means the family reunion is off for this summer." I tried to contain my smile and noted that the rest of my cousins were also attempting to do so, with varying degrees of success.

"But where will we go instead?" Roxie asked with "covert" head signals towards the remainder of our friends. Her father smiled and winked, waving at Mr Malfoy. He waved back once in recognition and walked over.

"I hope you lot don't mind staying at our place for the entire summer," he said apologetically.

"Well, I suppose we could be convinced to do so," James said, trying not to smile.

"Eh, perhaps," Roxie said.

"It would take a good bargain though," Dom said.

"Like, access to Diagon Alley," Fred said.

"True, true," James agreed. Al, Rose and I decided to let them handle it. Rose, because she was blushing at Scor who was desperately avoiding eye contact, Al because, well he's Al, and me because I'm not as talkative as my cousins.

"And perhaps movie nights," Fred added.

"Oh, did I tell you I managed to pilfer the stereo from Frank's trunk?" James said.

"You did?" Fred asked excitedly.

"Yeah!" James said.

"Sweet," Fred said.

"Pilfer?" Mr Malfoy and Uncle George asked in unison.

"As a dorm we chipped in the money to buy it, but we always argue about who gets to take it home for the summer, and Frank got it last year and he almost got it again this year, but I lifted it before he could get his trunk out this morning," James explained. Uncle George looked proud, Mr Malfoy disturbed.

"So, that's a yes to staying with us for the summer?" Mr Malfoy confirmed.

"Yeah," we all replied.

"Great! So, we'll be off then," he said. "George," he said, shaking Uncle George's hand.

"Draco," George said. He hugged Fred and Roxie.

"Pleasure doing business with the two of you," he said to James and Ly, who high fived behind their backs. "And we'll see you all at Christmas!" With a final wave he disapparated.

When we arrived at Malfoy Flat, Mrs Malfoy and her sister were in a carrying row.

"I'm sorry to break the news to you Astoria, but someone's got to take care of them! Dad's broken his leg again, and they refuse to leave, which means one of us has to go up there and deal with them, and try to calm Mum down!" her sister yelled.

"I'm about to have fourteen children staying at my house for the entire summer, two of which are yours, and you want me to drop everything and go up to Switzerland to deal with our parents when you're free as a bird? What am I supposed to do? Trust that Draco can manage by himself? Have you met my daughter? She'd have the house burnt down in three days flat if I were gone!" Mrs Malfoy yelled back.

"Well, maybe if you kept it all in the family you wouldn't have that problem!" her sister yelled back.

"Maybe if you had friends when you were growing up, you'd understand how impossible that is!" Mrs Malfoy yelled.

"Excuse me," Mr Malfoy said to us, before ducking into the kitchen. We all looked at Ly, who was pale.

"Told you my mum hates me," she said.

"Mum doesn't hate you," Scor said. "You're just on very different wavelengths."

"You can say that again," Ly muttered. "Shall we?" she asked. She made for the stairs and we followed her nervously. When she's like this, she's liable to explode. Or have another episode. The most memorable one was in first year when she had an episode during our History of Magic exam and still passed. She got an E, which was actually better than Sam's score. He wasn't too happy about that.

"So, let's unpack, and we'll meet in the attic in half an hour?" Scor suggested with a nervous glance at his sister.

We agreed and made for our various rooms. Rose and I opened the door to the room we generally shared with Ly and Scor's cousin Em. Em was lying on her bed reading a magazine trying to seem unconcerned by life.

"Have they stopped rowing yet?" she asked.

"Erm…no," I said.

"Great," she replied. "Just bloody perfect. My mum, the Queen Bitch of the Universe. Drops off both her children at her sister's house every summer then expects said sister to go take care of their parents, while she goes off to Baden Baden for three weeks."

"I'm sorry," Rose said. She isn't quite sure what to make of Em most of the time. I think she likes her well enough, but I'm not sure of much beyond that. I like Em very much. She's a close friend. Not as close as Will and Sam, but close all the same.

"At least you get to be with us," I said. Em smiled.

"That's true," she said. "At least you don't have to be with your sister."

"Sisters," I corrected. "I now have sisters plural."

"Ouch," she said.

"Yeah, tell me about it," Rose said.

"You too, huh?" Em said.

"No, I now have brothers plural," Rose said. "And Roxie has a sister now too."

"And we've all got a new first cousin, but we probably won't ever meet her or him since she/he lives in Romania with his or her parents," I said.

"Impressive," Em said.

"Yeah, I think so," I said, opening my trunk and pulling out my clothes. I dusted them off and hung them up in my section of the closet the three of us shared. Rose did the same. Em's stuff was already there.

"It's nice having a room where you can actually see the floor," Rose said.

"Yes," I agreed. "Yes it is."

"Oh, that's right. You guys share a dorm with Ly, Dom and Roxie," Em said. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine," I said. "I like them."

"I mean, for the slob-ness," she added.

"Oh. Yeah, I don't particularly like that," I said. Rose snorted. "Who's your dorm mate?" I asked Em.

"Girl named Raven Anderson," she said. "She likes boys, and shopping, and not doing her homework, and ranting about everything that's wrong with her life to me. I swear to Merlin I was sorted into the wrong house."

"I'm sorry," I said.

"It's okay. I just wish that during school and stuff I could hang out with you guys," she said.

"Why don't you?" Rose asked.

"Because I'd get beat up," Em said. "I'm not kidding. I'd get jinxed, hexed, cursed and beat up."

"That's terrible," Rose said.

"That's Slytherin House," Em said. "They're not evil, but they do not associate with Gryffindors. Or Hufflepuffs or Ravenclaws for that matter."

"That's no fun," I said.

"I know," Em said. Just then the door burst open and Ly ran in.

"Shhhh!" she giggled. "I'm hiding!"

"Ly?" called James. "Lyra, where are you?" Ly giggled. Oh, wait. Isn't giggling supposed to be bad?

"Lyra, do you have any siblings?" Em asked.

"Who? Me? No, I'm an only child," she said.

"That means she's having an episode, right?" I asked.

"Yeah," Em replied. "James, she's in here!" The door burst open.

"Aw, you ruined my fun!" Ly insisted.

"She's having an episode," Em said.

"Great," James said. He took her by the shoulders and made her look at him. "Lyra, look at me," he said. She stared at him, trying not to laugh. "Lyra, wake up." She raised an eyebrow at him. He raised his right back. Suddenly she seemed to slump forward like she'd lost all her will power to stand. James carried her over to the spare bed in our room and set her on it. She was out cold. Rose went about her unpacking while I read Em's magazine with her. _Witch Weekly_ is questionable sometimes. Really, really questionable.

"Ooh! A quiz," Em said. "Okay. It's a quiz about what type of relationship you prefer. Would you rather a) go on a Valentine's Day dinner with someone special or b) go to a party on the big day without a date?"

"Erm…go to a party," I said.

"Okay. Do you prefer a) potions or b) charms?" she continued

"Charms," I said.

"What is this?" James asked in disgust.

"It's a quiz in _Witch Weekly_," Em replied. "Now, chocolate or ice cream?"

"Ice cream," I said.

"Do you prefer to get jewellery from that someone special or flowers?"

"Flowers," I said.

"Okay. So this means you don't play for keeps, just for fun. You'll keep your Mr Wizard around as long as he doesn't interfere with your friends, and the moment it starts looking serious you've had your fun," she read. "Well, that's boring."

"What'd you get?" I asked.

"Mine was, 'you play for keeps but you also keep them guessing. Your Mr Right will come, but he won't know it at the time – and neither will you'," Em read in distaste.

"This isn't my room," Ly said from the corner.

"No," James said. "Oh, good you're awake!" he said as an afterthought, seeming to realise that she'd just woken up from her episode. "Who's your best friend?"

"You are," Ly said, sounding concerned for James's mental health. He sighed in relief. "What?" she asked. "Oh. Oh Merlin. Did I do anything stupid?"

"You stole my wand," James said. "And I'd quite like it back."

"I'm sorry, James. I don't know where it is," Ly said. She seemed on the verge of tears, which was quite unlike her. "It was just, my mum was yelling, and-"

"Hey, it's okay," he said, hugging her.

"No it's not," she said.

"Yes it is," he said. "It's not your fault." She hugged him tighter. "And plus, now you've got nine months until your next episode."

"True," she said sniffling.

"Now, we're supposed to be meeting everyone in the attic," he said. "Shall we?" She nodded and stood up with his help. It's amazing how vivacious she is normally and then when she has an episode she's so…not.

The door closed behind them before any of us spoke again.

"I feel like I just intruded on something majorly private," Em said.

"I agree," Rose said.

"Aren't we supposed to be in the attic?" I asked.

"Oh, right," Rose said. The three of us walked up the stairs to the attic where we found everyone assembled. Ly was laughing at something someone had said, the only indication she wasn't one hundred per cent was that she was still holding James's hand.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I needed ice cream. It was four in the morning and I needed ice cream. I snuck down the stairs into the kitchen and made for the freezer. Maybe Minty wouldn't catch me. I opened the door to the kitchen. It was brightly lit. Rose and Scor were sitting at the island in the middle sharing a pint of chocolate.

"Please tell me that wasn't the last of the ice cream," I said.

"No, there's another pint in the freezer," Scor said. Rose looked pink about getting caught with him in the wee hours of the morning. She doesn't realise that we all know they're hopelessly in love. They're almost as bad as Ly and James. Well, actually, James and Ly know they're in love, they just won't admit it. Rose and Scor, they're both too obstinate to realise they love each other and that it is, in fact, requited love.

I opened the freezer, letting the cold air wash over me. Then I blinked and pulled out the pint of vanilla ice cream. I sat down at the other end of the island from them and grabbed a spoon.

"So what were you saying when Lucy walked in?" Scor asked.

"Nothing," Rose said quickly. I snorted into my ice cream and tried to pass it off as a sneeze. "Bless you," she said. Oh goody. It worked.

"No, you were going to say something!" Scor insisted.

"Just that, well, you're kind of, well, kind of my best friend," Rose said in a rush.

"You're kind of my best friend too," Scor said, both of them turning pink. I rolled my eyes. With James and Ly at least, that was one of the easy questions he could ask to see if she was having an episode. "Who's your best friend?" "You are. Therefore, see, I'm not having an episode." And then Rose and Scor, who are equally in love, haven't even admitted to being best friends. That's rather sad, isn't it?

I looked up. They were awkwardly shuffling their feet. I shook my head to myself, while smiling and opened the fridge to try and find some caramel sauce and a bowl. I succeeded on both accounts.

"Anyone need caramel?" I asked. They both jumped like they'd forgotten I was here.

"Uh, no thanks, Luce. I'm gonna go back to bed," Rose said. "It was just too warm in our room."

"Believe me," I said. "I know."

"I'll take some caramel," Scor said.

"Okay," I replied, handing him the jar. He spooned it on. I put it back in the fridge and went back to my seat. "I'd just like to say, really? It's taken the two of you this long to say you were best friends?"

"What?" he asked, looking aghast. "When else would we have?"

"Considering that you've been best friends for two years, I figured it would've been before now," I said. He still seemed shocked I was speaking so candidly. I'm only really an airhead on the outside. And I notice things. A lot of things. "And especially since you're in love with her and all…"

"I-I am not!" he spluttered. I smiled the Weasley smile at him. That is, the smile that looks sweet on the outside, but covers pure mischievous genius. "Okay, maybe just a little." I nodded and took a bite of my ice cream. "Okay, maybe a lot."

"There you go," I said. "Well, this has been a lovely chat, so I'll leave you to your thoughts then." I put my bowl in the sink and went back to my room. I fell asleep laughing.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The roof of Malfoy Flat looks like it has a green house on top of it. However, it is equipped with an Undetectable Extension Charm, and is actually a Quidditch pitch. This meant that during the summer, Dom, James, Fred and Ly could all practise for the upcoming school year. The only problem was they wanted us to form pick up teams and play with them. Rose refused point blank. Dylan stared James dead on and said, "That's not the type of Quidditch I play, mate." Al had stared at him confused for a moment before cottoning on and looking disturbed. They managed to get Will onto the pitch, and Scor even. They almost managed to get Sam to stay upright on a broom, but then he fell off and they let him be. Em volunteered, but that's because she plays for Slytherin. They got Roxie out too and had eight players. No Seekers. Eventually, they realised they couldn't actually play any games. So, Em, as a Chaser like James, Ly and Fred ended up playing with them. Then they realised they needed a Keeper.

"Well, I played Keeper growing up," Ly said. "Always. It just wasn't an available position at try outs. So I'll do it." And then she played Keeper and Em played Chaser. Dom gave Will a Beater's bat (not the wisest choice in my opinion) and they told Scor and Roxie they could leave if they wanted. From that moment on, the rest of the summer was spent by the six of them working on their technique. And it was going quite nicely too, until a Bludger flew at Will and in a panic he dropped his bat, almost falling to his death, but catching the Quaffle instead. Fred, Em, and James stared at him in utter shock.

"What?" he asked.

"I couldn't have made that catch," James said.

It is known school fact that James is the best Chaser since his grandpa.

Will looked disturbed as he flew over to them to hand it back.

"No, don't give it back," Fred urged. "Go score." Will looked uncertain and flew towards the goal posts Ly was guarding. Ly had missed the whole exchange and was therefore unprepared to have Will fly towards her with the Quaffle.

You get to see all sorts of fun things when you bring a box of sugar mice and make a day of watching your friends practise their Quidditch.

"Will, what are you doing?" she asked.

"They told me to," he said, pointing at Em, Fred and James who were watching intently. Dom was hovering near me. She jumped off her broom into the impromptu stands and sat next to me. I offered her a sugar mouse. She gratefully accepted.

"Alright," Ly said. "Go ahead." Nervously, Will lobbed the Quaffle at the goal posts. She caught it easily. Will started to fly back towards the place where he'd dropped his bat. Before he could, the Quaffle zoomed past his head. On what seemed like instinct, he caught it.

"Again," Ly said. He looked confused as hell, but did it anyways. James, Em and Fred landed next to us as well. I pulled out a box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans and passed them around. James made a retching noise.

"Oh, Merlin. Gym shorts," he said, looking ill. Fred laughed.

Will's shot flew towards the left goal post, and would've made it in, but Ly grabbed it with the very tips of her fingers. It was a truly fantastic save, and from what I knew about Quidditch and its history at Hogwarts in relation to people I know currently, my dad's old dorm mate from Hogwarts, Oliver Wood, who happened to be a world class Keeper, and played for England in the Cup more than once, was at the same level Ly is now when he was her age. And Ly had only _just_ caught the Quaffle. James, Dom, Em and Fred looked shocked. Ly was staring at the Quaffle in her hands in shock and confusion. She threw it back to Will.

"Again," she said.

She kept at this until Will finally got so frustrated he looped around the pitch twice, before lobbing the Quaffle neatly through the centre hoop. Ly dove to get it before it hit the ground and came back up, staring at him in stunned silence.

"So, here's my idea," Dom said. "We kill Larry," she said. "The Keeper," she added for my benefit. "Ly replaces him, and then we replace her with Will."

"Sounds reasonable to me," Fred agreed. "Because, that was fucking beautiful." Will and Ly landed next to us. Will was covered in sweat and seemed to still be in a bad mood.

"Why the hell did I have to do that?" he asked.

"Will," James said solemnly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "You started by making three catches that neither myself, Fred, Em nor Ly could have made. You then made a goal past Ly, which all three of us have yet to do this summer. You're a fucking natural, man."

"I am?" he asked, sounding surprised.

"Yeah," Ly said. I noticed that she also seemed to have worked up a sweat.

"Me, I just have the habit of plucking things out of the air," James said. "And forgetting my shoes," he added, pointing at his bare feet. "You, have talent. Raw talent, yeah, but you spend the rest of the summer training with us, and we really will kill Larry. Or get Frank to drug him or something, so that you get on the team."

"You will?" Will asked.

"Yeah," Ly replied earnestly. "Well, I'm going to go take a shower." She turned and headed for the door.

"Need a hand?" James called after her.

"Bugger off!" she called back without turning around. She didn't sound offended, merely like they'd been having this conversation a lot.

"She is right though. About the shower thing," James said. "I think I'll take one myself." He excused himself.

"I'm just gonna lie here, and die of exhaustion," Will said, falling onto one of the benches.

"Good job, too," Fred said.

"What? Dying of exhaustion?" Will asked.

"No, getting a Quaffle past Lyra," he said. "M'lady," he said, bowing in a highly proper manner at Em. He turned and left as well. That's funny. She doesn't seem his type. Lyra seems his type, which is why I think he's secretly bitter.

"So strange, your family," Em said to me.

"Believe me, I know," I replied.

"Hey!" Dom said.

"Well, not you," Em said. "You're the most normal, so far as I figure. The two of you."

"No, Lucy is the most normal," Dom said. "I've got my blood working against me in that department."

"The whole V thing?" Em asked. "Well, besides that you're normal."

"Thanks," Dom said. The "V thing" is what we call the Veela problem when she's around. She beats up the boys who point it out. Like the guy who tried out against her during Quidditch try outs last year. "Well, it's almost dinner, so a shower is sounding really good right now." She turned and left as well, leaving me, Em and the half dead Will behind.

"Come on, Will," I said, grabbing his hand and pulling him to his feet.

"Can't," he said. "I can't stand properly."

"We've got you," Em said, taking his other arm. Between the two of us, we managed to get him into the room he shared with Sam and Al. He fell towards the bathroom on his own volition.

"I don't know who's cuter," Em said. "Him or Fred." I shrugged.

"I'm related to one, best friends with the other. I'm not the girl to ask," I said. She shrugged.

"Ah well. I guess I'll have to settle for finding them both sickeningly handsome," she said. I laughed and together we walked down to dinner.

**Read and Review!**


	10. 10: Sam

**A/N: And here we enter third year, possibly their most important year besides seventh. Nothing particularly earth shattering in this chapter, but the count down is started. Just so you all know, 3. **

**Chapter 10: Sam**

"I will not," said a voice from nearby.

"Yes you will," said another voice.

"No I won't," said the first voice.

"Yes. You. Will," said the second voice. "Will!"

"What?" said a third voice.

"Not you," said both the first and second voices in unison.

"Will not," the first voice said.

"Mate, you've got to ask her out sometime," said the second voice. All three voices sound familiar now.

"No I don't," the first voice said. I think it may be Scorpius. Which makes the second voice Dylan, and the third voice Will. Oh. It's the first day of classes, isn't it? Great. I blinked, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.

Dylan and Scor were at arm's length from each other in the middle of our dorm, brandishing various weapons. Scor's was a wand; Dylan's a pair of uniform trousers he should've been wearing.

"Are they fighting over a girl this early in the year?" Will asked. I shrugged. Like I'd know.

"No," Al said, coming out of the bathroom with a tooth brush in his mouth. "Dylan is contending that Scor ask out Rose, while Scor says he doesn't have to because, and I quote, 'It's my birthday'."

"It is my birthday, thank you," Scor said. "And I'll do whatever I bloody well please, and that does not include destroying my friendship with Rose."

"You wouldn't be destroying your friendship with Rose. You'd be making it better since you both like each other and want to get married to each other and have lots of sex and babies," Dylan said. "With each other."

"I do not!" Scor said. Dylan just raised his eyebrow. "I only want to do those things a little bit!" Dylan raised the eyebrow still further. "You sound like Lucy!"

Lucy had this conversation with Scor? Huh. Odd.

I wonder if you could charm inanimate objects to take on the personalities of people you know…

I grabbed my journal and flipped to the section of questions to ask. I scribbled it down. I probably just got ink everywhere. I so don't care.

"I'll see you all at breakfast," Al said, returning from replacing his tooth brush and grabbing Scor by the arm before Dylan could damage Scor. He dragged him down the stairs and out of the room. No sooner had they left when James and Fred barged into the room.

"Okay, so we're still on for tonight at the Tower, right?" James asked eagerly.

"Yeah, of course," Dylan said. "They're our best friends, too, you know."

"I know, I know," James said distractedly. "It's going to be mostly Gryffindors with a few members of other houses, like Em-"

"Em's going to be there?" Will and Fred asked in unison.

"Yeah," James said distractedly. "So it'll be pretty mellow all things considering."

"You're planning a birthday party for Ly and Scor in the Tower where it will be mostly Gryffindors and you think it's going to be mellow?" Dylan said. "Is there anything that isn't related to playing Quidditch in your brain or did the Bludgers knock it entirely out of you?"

"Quidditch, pranks and girls, mate, what more do you need," James said. "Anyways, see you all at breakfast." He bounded back out, followed by Fred.

"He's insane," I said. "I honestly think so."

"Nah," Dylan said, smiling. "He's in love."

"So, yes, he's insane," Will said. Dylan laughed and the two of us followed him to the Great Hall for breakfast. Our friends were desperately going over the time tables trying to figure out which classes to take.

"Charms, Transfiguration, Potions, History of Magic, Astronomy, Herbology and Defence Against the Dark Arts are still required courses," Rose said. "So, what will our two electives be?"

"Let's see…how about Care of Magical Creatures?" Lucy suggested.

"That's one down," Rose said, ticking it off.

"Let's not take Divination," Will said.

"Okay. So, Muggle Studies?" Scor suggested.

"Happy birthday!" Rose shouted, jumping up from the bench and hugging him. She seemed to realise what she'd done and they both turned pink before sitting down.

"Sounds good to me. Muggle Studies and Care of Magical Creatures," Ly said, joining us as well.

"Happy birthday!" James exploded, jumping up and grabbing her. He hugged her to him and spun her around before setting her back on the ground. I see what Will meant about being insane because he was in love.

"Happy birthday, Lyra," Fred muttered, more to himself than anyone. Lucy stared at him quizzically. He didn't notice.

"Happy birthday, Ly, Scor," Em said from behind me.

"Thank you," Ly said, sitting down between James and Fred.

"Thanks, Em," Scor said. "Want to sit with us?"

"I'd love to," she said, exchanging significant looks with Lucy. "But I can't. All you Gryffindor goody-goodies would rub off on me and I'd lose my Slytherin edge. Just wanted to wish you birthday salutations. I'll see you guys in class, yeah?" she said. She turned and walked away. Both Fred and Will stared after her with glazed looks in their eyes.

I wonder if you can make a charm that would make somebody's eyes glaze over and then they could see whatever they wanted under the glaze…

I'd reached for my notebook when I remembered that was a Weasley's Wizard Wheezes product. I flipped to the "Charms I Like" section and scribbled it down anyways.

"Well, it's time for our first class of the day," Rose said. "Charms!" I smiled broadly and the lot of us got up and made for the Charms classroom. Professor Macmillan is one of my favourites. Namely because he teaches my favourite subject.

We piled in the door and sat down in the middle and front rows so that we were two deep, rather than spread out. About ten minutes in, as I was scribbling everything about Cheering Charms that Professor Macmillan was saying, he came over and pulled the book out of my hand.

"Sam, I appreciate that you're writing a novel, or whatever it is you're doing, but if you could not do it in my class, it would be greatly appreciated," Professor Macmillan said in a low voice. "And, about your summer homework, I'd like to see you after class." He turned and went back to his podium.

What about my summer homework? I did it perfectly. And now I can't take notes because he took my notebook.

I wonder if I could pull off a Summoning Charm and get it back…

I was about to try when Will grabbed my wrist and made me stop.

"What could possibly be wrong with your summer Charms homework?" he muttered to me.

"I don't know," I said.

"Because if you did it wrong, then we're all in trouble," he said.

Finally, the bell rang. The rest of my friends headed to break, but I stayed in the classroom that I felt had betrayed me. I approached the podium.

"Sir?" I asked.

"I looked at what you were writing," he said without looking at me. I realised he was staring at my notebook. "I'm sorry I thought you weren't paying attention in class. I've just never had a student take notes with that much enthusiasm before."

"May I have my notebook back?" I asked. He nodded distractedly, but didn't hand it back. "Professor?" I asked.

"Oh, right. Sorry. Here you are," he said, handing it over.

"And you wanted to talk about my summer homework?" I asked. I must have looked terrified.

"Yes. Step into my office, if you would," Professor Macmillan said. I followed him in. "Please, have a seat." I looked at it, concerned. "You're not in trouble," he said. I sat. He sat down in his seat and offered me a tin of biscuits. I took one.

"I know I did my homework properly. I did it well. Why am I here?" I said. He seemed amused.

"You're not one for modesty, are you?" he asked.

"Not that, I just don't see any reason to be modest when I know I don't have to be," I said. "It's really an honesty issue."

"Of course," said Professor Macmillan. "Sam, I haven't seen work like the work in your notebook or on your homework since I've been a professor here. My NEWT students don't have the brains combined to figure out some of the charms in your book. You've got a gift."

"Thank you, sir," I said.

He stood up and walked over to a cage in the corner. He pulled out a fat black rat, which hung limply in his hands and then sniffed around his desk for the tin of biscuits.

"This is Martha. She's very depressed. Do you think you could help her, based on today's lecture?" he asked.

"With a Cheering Charm?" I asked.

"Yes," he said.

"Well, yeah," I said. I pointed my wand at the rat and whispered the incantation. Immediately, Martha sat up and cleaned her whiskers with her paws. I swear she actually smiled before alighting upon the tin and prying the lid off. Professor Macmillan grabbed her by the tail and pulled her out, but not before she'd gotten a cookie. He shook his head at her and placed her back in her cage where she munched happily on her treat.

"Impressive," he said.

"Thank you, sir," I said.

"When I took your notebook, what was your immediate thought process?" he asked.

"I was going to try a Summoning Charm to get it back," I said. Like I said, I have an honesty problem.

"Well, do it," Professor Macmillan said.

"We haven't studied them," I said.

"So?" he asked. I pointed my wand at my notebook.

"_Accio_ notebook," I said. It flew through the air and into my outstretched hand. Professor Macmillan looked delighted.

"Sam, how would you feel about having private Charms tutoring sessions with me, rather than taking Charms class with your peers who are not to your level? Even the brightest all around students in your year-"

"Rose and Scorpius," I said.

"Yes, even they aren't at your level. It seems such a waste to make you sit in that class doing nothing when you could be excelling, becoming the best Charm writer in the world. You have that potential you know," he said.

"I'm only thirteen," I said. "What could I do?"

"You just showed me that you've already mastered the fourth year subject matter, or at least half of it, and most of the subject matter for third year with only one class devoted to it. Mr Malfoy and Miss Weasley will take at least half the term to perform a charm like you did. Sam, I'm offering you an opportunity to go from greatness to excellence," Professor Macmillan said. "Without being held back by your peers. What do you think?"

What do I think?

I wonder if I could come up with a charm that lets people project their thoughts onto a wall so they could edit them…

"I think it sounds brilliant, sir," I said.

"Wonderful," he said. "Do Tuesdays after dinner work for you?"

"Should be perfect, sir," I said.

"Great. I'll just talk to McGonagall about changing your timetable so that you don't have to come to the normal class," he said.

"No," I said. "I'll still do the normal class." He seemed confused.

"Why?" he asked. I shrugged.

"So that I can help my friends with their homework," I said. He laughed and shook his head incredulously.

"Alright then. If that's what you want to do," he said. "Then I will see you on Tuesday," he said, shaking my hand. I nodded and grabbed my bag, walking out to the courtyard. My friends were standing in a circle by the far corner, the place we always stood.

"What'd the professor want?" Will asked. I shrugged.

"Wants to tutor me in Charms beyond what we're learning in class," I said.

"Really?" Rose said. "But we've only just started the year!"

"And I can already do a Cheering Charm," I said.

"No you can't, Sam. I know you're good at Charms and everything, but after one day that's impossible," she said.

"Maybe for you," I said. "But for me it's not." She turned red.

"No, you can't," she said.

"Yes I can," I said. "I can do a Summoning Charm too."

"But Sam, that's fourth year coursework," Scor said, joining our conversation.

"I know," I said.

"How could you possibly have known a Summoning Charm?" Rose said. "He says he can do Cheering Charms too," she added for Scor's benefit.

"He is to Charms as I am to Transfiguration," Will said. "Which we have next, incidentally. You've both seen me get it on the first try, right?" They nodded. "So why should he be any different?" Sometimes they treat me like I'm autistic. I'm really not. My mum and dad thought I was when I was a kid and had all the tests done. But they all came back negative. I think if any of them were more familiar with the Muggle world they would've said it by now, but they aren't. I guess I'm kind of glad for it.

"What are you talking about?" Dom asked, coming over. I smiled at her. She smiled back briefly.

I think I love her.

I wonder if I could make a charm that would make it possible for people to just intuit when someone likes them…

"I'm taking private lessons with Professor Macmillan for Charms," I said.

"Wait, you're leaving our Charms class?" Dom asked.

"No," I said. "I'm staying on with it, so that if any of you guys need help I know what you're studying."

"I don't need help with Charms," Rose said, storming away. Scor looked confused at me and headed after her. The bell had rung.

"Don't mind her," Lucy said. "She's just jealous."

"Oh, hey, Luce," I said.

"Congratulations on your Charms lessons," she said.

"Thanks," I replied.

"You know, Rose and Scor would believe you more if you showed them you're serious," Will said.

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," he replied. Rose was about ten feet in front of us through a crowd of people. I pointed my wand at her bag.

"_Accio _Rose's bag," I said. The bag flew off her shoulder and into my hand. She turned ready to yell that someone had stolen her things and saw me holding it. She stormed over.

"How did you do that?" she asked.

"With a Summoning Charm," I said. She looked furious.

"You can't do a Summoning Charm!" she insisted.

"_Accio_ Scorpius," I said, pointing at him from where he was standing in the queue for Transfiguration. I believe he's six feet tall these days. He looked around in panic as he was dragged by unseen forces towards us. He got dropped next to us and almost fell over, but Will caught him. Rose's jaw dropped.

"You actually can…" she said in utter disbelief.

"Did I just get a Summoning Charm placed on me?" Scor asked, sounding utterly confused.

"Yep," Dom said. "I guess Sam was telling the truth all along. Although why you thought he wasn't is beyond me." The two of them stared at me in complete confusion. Dom, Lucy, Will and I turned and headed for the Transfiguration queue.

"Think there's any chance Professor Spinet will give me the same chance Professor Macmillan gave you?" Will asked.

"If you become a Chaser she might," Dom said. "She played for Gryffindor when she was a student."

"And maybe if she talks to Professor Macmillan about it," Lucy said, giggling about something.

"True, true," Dom said.

"What?" Will asked.

"I heard from Scor and Ly's mum that they're dating," Dom said.

"You heard that Scor and Ly's mum is dating his dad?" I asked. Dom rolled her eyes at me.

"No," she said. "I heard that Professor Macmillan and Professor Spinet are dating."

"Oh," I said.

I wonder if I could charm something so that it worked as a girl to guy dictionary…

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Happy birthday dear Ly and Scor, happy birthday to you!" we all sang. We were gathered in the Tower. They blew out the candles and smiled identically. Well, almost. Ly's smile seemed a touch more…mischievous. But that's because Scor's a good guy, whereas Ly is a wild card.

The cake was from their mum. She sent it via owl this morning. A huge stack of presents was mounded next to it. Most of them were from us, but some were from the other guests. The majority of Gryffindor house was here. And Em somewhere apparently. I couldn't see her, but I wasn't really looking. I was much more interested in the cake.

"I thought James said Em was going to be here somewhere," Fred said, walking by. Will regarded him suspiciously.

"Yeah, he did," he said.

"Come dance," said Roxie, appearing out of nowhere and grabbing Will's hand. She dragged him into the dancing crowd. Fred watched them go with a scowl on his face.

"Does he like my little sister?" he asked me.

"Er…" I said. Someone save me. I can't lie when asked a direct question. Please, someone save me.

"Hello, boys," said Dom, appearing out of nowhere like Roxie had. She looked amazing, as usual in a red tank top and jeans.

"You look great," I said, earnestly.

"Thanks," she said.

"I'm going to go hurl," Fred said, pointing in the opposite direction before disappearing into the crowd. Ly and James were slow dancing nearby. I can't tell if that's what made him nauseous or not.

"You just saved my life," I said. "Or rather, Will's life."

"How so?" Dom asked.

"Because Fred asked me if Will liked Roxie and I can't lie, you know that, I have to tell the truth, it's this compulsive need, and I almost told him but then you showed up," I said.

"Oh! Well that's good then," she said.

"Yeah," I said. "It would've been terrible if Fred found out that Will's in love with Roxie and then killed Will for it. For wanting to do dirty things to his little sister, that is."

"Dirty things?" Dom asked, sounding both amused and confused. Oh shit.

I wonder if I could make a charm that would make it impossible for me to tell anyone's secrets…

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	11. 11: Al

**A/N: Third year continues and life goes on. Mostly. Well, yeah. Life is continuing at this point. But still, last chapter was 3 so now, 2. **

**Chapter 11: Al**

Unfortunately for Will, there weren't Quidditch try outs this year, since all the spots were filled. It took the combined efforts of Roxie, Lucy, Dom and Sam to cheer him up. After all his hard training this summer with Ly and James and Fred and Em and he can't even try for the team. It does kind of suck. Fortunately, Ly, James and Fred have also come up with a plan to incapacitate the current Keeper and make it so Ly can become Keeper and Will can become Chaser before the first game. Whether or not they actually pull it off is another question entirely. I believe it involves a mushroom that lets the eater believe he's some form of shrubbery.

All I know is that Frank Longbottom is involved, and that never ends well.

"Al, focus," Dylan said, snapping his fingers in front of my face.

"Sorry," I said. "I'm focused. Go."

"What was the outcome of the 1867 Goblin rebellion in relation to the economic standing of goblin kind?" he asked.

"No idea," I said. "What was it?" Dylan rolled his eyes. He and Roxie alone of our group have the ability to remain awake during History of Magic.

"The Goblins became the sole shareholders in Gringotts. Before there had been Wizard interference," he said. "And also, the Wizards had to stop taxing the Goblins for the handling of gold."

"The Wizards were taxing the Goblins for handling fees?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah," he said.

"Well that's shit," I said.

"Yes, and then they had a rebellion," Dylan said. "Okay. Goblins have wars for one of three reasons. What are they?"

"Taxes," I said. "Gold. And I don't know what the third one is."

"Crimes of honour," Dylan said.

"What is a 'crime of honour'?" I asked. We have midterms next week.

"A crime of honour, well, you know the 1658 Massacre, right?" he asked.

"No," I said.

"All the Goblins in Ireland fought all the Goblins in Scotland," he summed up. "Because the leader of the Goblin clan in Ireland sneezed within ten feet of the princess of the Goblins of Scotland."

"And that was a crime of honour?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"Why do you know that?" I asked, honestly worried for his sanity. He's my best mate and all, but I think he may actually be clinically insane.

"Because I pay attention in History of Magic," he said.

"Mate, Binns is dead, and has been dead for a century and a half," I said. "He's been giving the same test to students for fifteen decades. You don't need to pay attention. Chances are, Uncle Fred and Uncle George's copies of Aunt Hermione's tests are still around somewhere and we can just copy the answers down."

"They really did that? I thought Fred was kidding," Dylan said.

"No," I said. "I have it from Uncle George in writing."

"Oh," he said.

"Yeah," I said. "So, if we find them, we're good."

"Cool," he said. "What I want to know," he said as I started to get up. "Is, if you're so keen on being a Healer, why don't you pay more attention in school?"

"You remember in first year when you had to force me to leave all my essays here?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said, smirking at the memory.

"I do that for the classes that count for something," I said. "Like Herbology, and Potions, and Charms and Transfiguration. Not History of Magic."

"Can we do Muggle Studies now?" he asked.

"No," I said. "I'm going to bed."

"Wait!" he said. "If you leave, I'll show everyone the pictures of you drunk this summer." I turned from the stairs and sat back down. It was true. One night, we'd gotten the guys together, stolen a bottle of Firewhiskey and gone up to the attic before getting totally trashed and ending up spilling all of our secrets. Fortunately for Will, who admitted to wanting Roxie in ways that would make Fred kill him, Fred passed out early on. Fortunately for Sam, no one was surprised when he said he was in love with Dom. Nor were we surprised when Scor admitted to being in love with Rose, or when James said he loved Ly. At this point, Dylan had started snapping photographs with the camera his cousin had gotten him for his birthday. Most of them were of me making funny faces at the camera. I don't remember this, but I had also apparently decided it was a good idea to take off all of my clothing. He says he has photographic ("photo-_very_-graphic evidence" as he calls it) of this, but he refuses to show me. I'd rather not chance it.

"You were raised as a Muggle," I said. "Why are you doing this to me?"

"Because you weren't," he said. "Now sit down and shut up."

OOooOOooOOooOO

As it turned out, Aunt Hermione's tests arrived with the actual History of Magic exams. They were stapled to the forms with all of the answers in neat, clear handwriting.

"That looks like Mum's handwriting," Rose said.

"That's because it is," I said.

"Uncle George was serious?" she asked.

"Yep," I said.

"Oh," she said. Because of this, everyone in the class finished our tests in half an hour and Binns let us leave. Good thing too, because History of Magic was the last class of the day and there was a Quidditch game tomorrow against Hufflepuff. We'd barely sat down to dinner when Liam Wood, the Quidditch captain, showed up and dragged Ly, James, Fred and Dom away to the very end of the table where the rest of the Quidditch team sat.

"They don't really have a choice, do they?" Lucy said. "It's a shame. I wanted to wish them luck."

"Well, there's always tomorrow before the game," Roxie said consolingly.

"I want to play," Will muttered angrily.

"Look at you," she said teasingly. "They took you from a guy who thought he couldn't stay on his broom to a raging Quidditch fanatic."

"Yes they did," Will said. "And now I get to sit here and not do anything about it because of Larry Townsend."

"Well, I say fuck Larry Townsend," said Em, sitting down with us. "Budge over, Al." I budged. Half the Great Hall was staring at her in shock.

"Hey, Em!" Lucy said.

"Hey, Luce," she said. Fred was staring down the table at us in confusion.

"What happened to the whole, beat up, jinxed, hexed, and cursed thing?" she asked.

"I don't have friends in Slytherin," Em said. "I have friends here."

"Well, you're always welcome here," Will said.

"Thanks, Will," Em said.

"He means-" Sam started. Will smacked his hand over Sam's mouth.

"What would you need to do to make sure the cumulative magic of a power point was strong enough to perform a Binding Charm?" he asked Sam. The cogs started working in Sam's brain and he pulled out his Charms journal and a quill, whatever incriminating evidence he was about to give about Will long forgotten.

"What was that?" Roxie asked.

"Me, saving Sam from himself," Will said.

"By encouraging his Charms neuroses?" I asked.

"That's what Professor Macmillan told us to do," Will said. "If we need to distract him, or just want to give him something to do, just make up something Charms related and see what he comes up with."

"Didn't Professor Spinet say something similar about you?" Dylan asked.

"Yes, but she didn't let me stay in the normal class, or give me private tutoring either," he said.

"No, you poor thing. She bumped you up to the fourth year Transfiguration class finally," Dylan said, rolling his eyes.

"And you still find it easy," I said.

"You disgust me," Dylan said. Rose's lips were getting dangerously thin. I knew that look from when we were kids. Whenever someone beat her at magic she got like that. Like at the beginning of the year when Sam got his private Charms lessons, and then again when Will got moved up in Transfiguration. Scor put his hand on her shoulder. She calmed down instantly.

They seriously need to date.

"So are James and Ly officially dating yet?" Em asked.

"No," Dylan grumbled.

"Are they unofficially dating yet?" she continued.

"I couldn't tell you," he said. "Lucy?"

"No, they aren't," she said. Lucy is the one who notices everything. She always has been, especially when we were all kids. "They're the same as they've always been."

"So, holding hands, just generally all over each other, but obstinately refusing to say they're in love?" Em summed up.

"Yep," Roxie said.

"Why are relationships all anyone in this group cares about anymore?" Will asked.

"So you've got a Labrador. It's a chocolate lab. It's been hit by a carriage and was pregnant. How do you save it so that the puppies survive?" Em said to him. He immediately started thinking and pulled out his Transfiguration notebook.

"Nicely handled," Roxie said.

"Thanks," Em said.

"Well, I'm going to go get started on my Potions homework," Rose said. She stood up and started walking for the door.

"Hey, Rose! Wait up!" Scor said, chasing after her.

"Dear Merlin those two need to get together," Em said.

"They're almost as bad as Ly and James," Dylan said.

"Almost," Em agreed.

"You know, it was just this summer they admitted to thinking of each other as their best friend," Lucy said.

"Who? Rose and Scorpius?" Em asked. Lucy nodded.

"They've been best friends since first year," Roxie said.

"Just like me and Dylan," I said.

"You know that's right," Dylan said. He snapped a picture of Will and Sam with their noses in their books. Which reminds me.

"Hey, Lucy, how's your nose?" I asked. She'd broken it the other day because she was reading while walking through the hallways and walked into a wall.

"It's fine," she said. "It's a little bruised, but it's mostly stopped hurting."

"May I?" I asked.

"Sure," she said, pulling off the bandage. It was smashed in in the centre. Madam Pomfrey had done a good job fixing it.

"Wait!" Will exclaimed suddenly. "What time is it?" he asked. I looked at my watch.

"Half seven, why?" I asked.

"Shit!" he exclaimed, throwing his notebook into his bag and sticking the quill behind his ear.

"You haven't eaten anything!" Roxie said indignantly. "Sit down and eat!"

"Can't. Don't have time," he exclaimed, making a mad dash for the door.

"What the hell?" Dylan asked.

"He's starting his super-secret project with Professor Spinet today," Roxie said. Em raised her eyebrows.

"That sounds questionable," she said.

"I know," Roxie said. "Like, if it were a different professor it would be less shady, but Professor Spinet's…well…"

"She's hot," I supplied.

"Yeah," Roxie and Em agreed.

"I agree that it sounds questionable, but I wouldn't mind being in his shoes," I said.

"Yeah. Become a Transfiguration whiz and maybe you can," Dylan said.

"Shush," I said.

We both know that's never going to happen.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The next morning, in the sleet and pissing rain, we presented ourselves in the Quidditch stands, wrapped in Gryffindor coloured ponchos, over our winter clothes. We got seats in the very front. Em edged towards us through the crowd and sat next to Sam. Will was almost asleep on Roxie's shoulder, Sam on his other side. Lucy was next to Roxie and Rose and Scor had neglected to join us. Dylan was making popcorn under the bench so that it wouldn't get wet. He handed the bags around. He's a regular homemaker.

"And flying for Gryffindor, we've got Captain Wood, Weasley, Weasley, Potter, Malfoy, Townsend and O'Brien!" We screamed as loudly as we possibly could, waking Will up. It's unlike him to be tired at a Quidditch game. His project with Professor Spinet must have worn him out. The captains shook hands and the Bludgers and Snitch were released.

Both Mum and Dad were disappointed when they couldn't get me on a broom. James was a natural, shocking that (note sarcasm), but I was not. James was catching everything that flew when he was two, while I ducked and covered. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate the sport, mind you. I just enjoy watching it.

Then the Quaffle was up and the game was on. This woke Will up.

"No! Porksoff!" he yelled when Ly flew by us with the Quaffle. She gave him the thumbs up and flew back towards James and Fred, executing a perfect Porksoff Ploy. Hufflepuff didn't stand a chance.

We were already up ninety when O'Brien caught the Snitch. We finished the game 240:10.

And therefore there was a wild party in the Tower in our honour. The night itself was a blur, but I'm pretty sure Dom ended up snogging Liam Wood again, which seems to be her standby when drunk, and I think I may have also gotten drunk again. I just assume this since I don't remember anything else from the night. I somehow got back to our dorm and woke up in my underwear and a feather boa, but I don't remember why. That's usually a bad sign.

"What happened last night?" I asked no one in particular.

"Mate, you don't want to know," Dylan said groggily from nearby.

"Hey, Sam?" I said.

"Yeah?" he asked, sounding like I felt. That is, dead. Like, pounding headache dead. Like, hung over for days dead.

"What happened last night?" I asked. "More importantly, where are my clothes?"

"You got piss drunk, spiked by Frank and then got down and dirty with a few of the girls from Hufflepuff who stole your clothes slowly over the course of the night," he said.

And since its Sam talking, I know he's telling the truth.

"What kind of down and dirty?" I asked, fearing the answer.

"Look in the mirror," Dylan suggested. I got out of bed and instantly regretted it, as I was now freezing. I walked into the bathroom. And screamed in horror. Half of my person was covered in lipstick marks in varying shades, while my neck was completely covered in hickeys. My eyes were incredibly bloodshot, it looked like I'd had a few bloody noses between last night and now, and both my eyes were black.

"What did I do?" I asked.

"Well, you did man shots with Fred," Dylan said. "And then the entire female population of Hufflepuff tried to, as one, kiss it and make it better/lick the remaining tequila off you."

"Forgive my ignorance," I said, attempting to wash the lipstick off my stomach, "but what is a 'man shot'?"

"And they say you're smart," Dylan said, shaking his head at me.

"They also say I'm a good boy, and look where that got me," I said.

"A man shot is when you take a shot of tequila, a wedge of lime, a line of salt and a partner. You squirt the lime in your eye, snort the salt, shoot the tequila to kill the pain and then punch your partner," Dylan explained. "Lovely Muggle game."

"So, Fred probably looks something like me right now?" I asked.

"Oh, no, he looks way worse," Dylan said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because you broke his jaw," Dylan said.

"I did?" I demanded. Oh that's not good.

"Yeah," Dylan said. He was smirking at me. "But it's okay, because you fixed it."

"I did?" I asked. "Like with medical magic?"

"Yes," he said.

"What did you do last night that put you in such a great mood?" I demanded.

"Me? I gave you a new nick name," he said.

"How drunk were you?" I asked.

"Compared to you? Stone cold sober. Compared to normal people, pretty pissed," he said.

"How drunk was I?" I asked in concern.

"Well, you didn't start in on man shots until you were five shots of Firewhiskey into the night. Then you went straight to the tequila for a while, then Frank spiked your drink with something that makes it impossible for you to throw up, which is why you didn't, and from there you did twelve man shots. That's another reason why Fred's in a worse way than you are," he said.

"That's a lot of alcohol," I said.

"Yes, yes it is," he said.

"So what's my nickname?" I asked. He smiled.

"I'm not going to tell you," he said.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because you won't like it," he said. I finally succeeded in removing the lipstick and headed back for bed. Then I noticed Will lying there, staring at the ceiling, blowing bubbles every time he exhaled.

"What happened to Will?" I asked.

Dylan clapped me on the shoulder. "Some things are much better left unsaid."

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	12. 12: Roxie

**A/N: Easily the longest chapter to date, including the ones I have that I haven't published yet. Maybe because this is the last chapter before it gets bad. It's also the last premier chapter, since after this it's much more plot driven and less about introducing every single character. **

**but yes. 1. next chapter, the shit hits the fan. **

**Chapter 12: Roxie**

I don't understand my friends. I really don't.

I mean, Rose and Scorpius for example. They're totally in love and yet, they've done nothing about it. Ever. It's confusing and bizarre. They're worse than Ly and James. Ly and James at least, like, hug voluntarily. Rose and Scor? Nope. Never. Well, Dom helps them out with that one, so they don't really need to, but they should. Unlike with James and Ly who are pretty much always touching. Seriously, Dom, Lucy and I have a pool going on which one of them is going to ask the other out first and whether or not they'll ask each other out on a date first, go straight to boyfriend and girlfriend, or just hand over a promise ring and have it done with.

Then there's the guys. Dylan, I don't pretend to understand, nor do I ever think I will. He's completely filled with this manic energy to make anything happen. It's like in the musical _Grease_, at the end when one of the characters says, "Come on, we're missing anything can happen day!" Dylan makes every day "anything can happen day." And bless him for it. However, I'm not entirely fond of his camera. He takes pictures of everything. _Everything_. Rumour has it, the guys got drunk at some point this summer (why weren't we invited? I'd like to know, but noooo…none of them will tell me) and Dylan now has a bunch of blackmail photos against Al, Scor, Will and Sam but won't share with us. He probably also has blackmail pictures against Dom (at least, he should if he was at all sober at the post game party for the Quidditch game against Hufflepuff. I mean, she made out with Liam. Again) and me, and Lucy and Rose and Ly as well, but he hasn't said anything.

And then there's Sam. Sam who seems like he should have no friends has all of us and gets along with everybody. I think that sometimes he gets so lost in his own head that it takes staring at Dom for hours on end to jump start his brain. At least, to jump start it away from Charms. That's all he spends Charms class doing anyways. Staring at Dom. It's because of his stupid private lessons with Professor Macmillan. He only comes to class so he knows what we're working on. Apparently, Professor Macmillan has him working on NEWT level charms theory and practise. I can't say I'm jealous. Being stuck in a room with Professor Macmillan for the space of Charms class is bad enough. Spending all my Tuesday nights in an empty classroom with Professor Macmillan would make it so much worse. I mean, I like Charms well enough, but…no. Just, no. And, Sam is, of course, in love with Dom, but he's gotten into the friend-zone and seems content to stay there. I'm not sure if this is because he thinks he hasn't got a gnome's chance in the WWW, or if it's because he doesn't know he likes her, but either way he's done absolutely nothing about it. Dom remains oblivious of course. And I'm pretty sure she likes Sam, even. I mean, after the Quidditch party, we were all sitting in the common room and she says, "Why do I keep making out with Liam when I'm drunk?" and Sam says, "Because you're part Veela." And so, all of us Weasleys were like, "Oh shit, Sam's going to die now. Shame. I liked him." And instead Dom just nods and says, "Well, that must be it." Maybe it's because it was Sam and anything coming from Sam is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. He can't even purposefully avoid a subject. It's quite extraordinary really.

And then there's Will. Please excuse the dreamy smile I'm sure just crossed my face. He seems to be the least jaded of any of our guy friends, except maybe Scor, who couldn't be jaded if he tried. And, not to mention, he's really cute. And really smart, and not even socially awkward like Sam. I'm actually fairly certain that if it wasn't for Will, Sam would've drifted away from reality completely. Will kind of acts like his interpreter for life. And more often than not keeps him from spilling someone's embarrassing secrets. I have a feeling that most of those embarrassing secrets are Will's himself, but he still has a knack for it. It's almost like he can sense when Sam's about to say something stupid. If that's not true friendship, I don't know what is. I do know, however, that Transfiguration got a lot harder when Professor Spinet moved him from our class to the fourth year class. Of course, he could've been doing the fourth year coursework last year. Which I think is why he's also doing the extra project with her that he won't tell us about. Except, I think McGonagall may be involved. So it's kind of important. We keep asking him when he'll tell us what he's doing, but he keeps answering he'll show us when he's done. Apparently that could be anywhere from now to three years from now.

Okay, for this one, I'm kind of jealous. Being closeted with Professor Macmillan, well, Sam is straight and I'm not interested in him anyways. But Professor Spinet is easily the most gorgeous of our professors and Will spends every Wednesday and Friday locked up with her working on his mysterious project. Which means he could fall for her. And then where would I be? I'd be stuck liking a guy who likes someone who was best friends with my mum at Hogwarts. And that would be weird. Really weird.

Okay, so, yeah, I like Will. I like Will a lot. I don't even know what it is about him. He's just…sweet. Really sweet and really loyal. And really, really cute. He's taller than me, for one. He's not as tall as James, or Scor, or Sam, even, but he is taller than me. Which is hard, since Ly, Dom and I are all pretty tall. Somehow, we've remained the same size all through Hogwarts, even though we've all grown. It's like…fate or something. But, even though I'm 5'9" or something ridiculous like that, he's still just a little bit taller than me. And he's got these eyes…Sorry. I don't mean to wax poetic at you, but sometimes I can't help it.

But as little as I understand my friends, I understand my family even less.

But, well, is that really surprising? Considering my family? I mean, my dad created the joke empire to end all joke empires and my mum was a Quidditch player.

Yet somehow, I'm neither a troublemaker nor a sports girl.

No, me, I'm a singer. Somehow. It's just weird, really.

And then, Aunt Audrey, she was a bar tender and Uncle Percy was a tight-ass, and somehow they ended up married. And then Molly's this stick in the mud, and Lucy's a total airhead with an impish underside. We don't know about Susan yet, because she's only eight months old.

Uncle Ron seems like he'd be a total idiot, but in reality he's one of the best Aurors in the business. Like, when Uncle Harry finally gives in and becomes Minister for Magic, Uncle Ron will be head of the Auror department, no questions asked. And Aunt Hermione's amazingly brilliant. Then, somehow, Rose ended up being unable to talk to boys. Her parents marched across the country fighting the Great War, and she can't march across the Great Hall and snog Scorpius. Hugo, however, takes after my father, when Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione only got up to action adventure stuff when they were at school. We'll have to wait and see about Alex, since he's just going on a year.

Then there's James and Al and Lily. James turned out exactly like his grandfather on his dad's side, apparently, rather than completely badass like his parents. Apparently, "trouble making genius" skips generations in the Potter family. And siblings. Because Al, despite his propensity to drink at parties and get wildly drunk before doing stupid things (remember the Quidditch party where Dom snogged Liam again? Al came out of that one way worse off than either of them since he seems to have snogged the entire female population of Hufflepuff), is really just a goody-two-shoes at heart. He's quite sweet normally. I suspect that he may one day shock us all by being gay. Well, he wouldn't shock me, but that's because I suspect it of him. Then there's Lily. The poor girl has spent her entire first year trying to fit in with us. And it's just not going to happen. I think she's finally given up and has started hanging out with Will's little sister Eloise, and Em's little sister Lizzie, and Frank Longbottom's (the one who spikes all the drinks) little sister Alice. Maybe the four of them will be good friends and Lily will stop trying so hard. Because Al and James really don't want her around. I can't say I blame them. She's kind of annoying.

No one in my family came out the way they were supposed to. None of us. At all. And I think it's done weird things to the family dynamic.

"Hey, Roxie!" called a very familiar voice from behind me. I supressed a smile and turned around.

"Hey, Will," I said.

"Hey," he said, jogging up to me.

"Hi," I replied. He fidgeted awkwardly.

"Going to Hogsmeade?" he asked.

"You know, I was considering pulling a Rose and Scorpius and staying in to study," I said. "But then I remembered that would be stupid and boring, so yeah, yeah I am."

"Oh. Cool," he said. He fidgeted some more.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah!" he said. "Yeah, I'm great."

"Okay," I said. "Well, I have to do the last of my Christmas shopping. I'm taking advantage of the fact Wood has them doing practise to buy Dom, Ly, James and Fred Christmas presents." I turned to walk away, but he caught my hand. I tried to ignore the fluttery feeling in my stomach and turned to face him.

"Can I go with you?" he asked.

"Sure," I said. He smiled in a relieved way.

"Thanks," he said.

"You know, you don't actually have to ask," I said.

"I know, but I wanted to," he said. He'd let go of my hand. I tried not to let my disappointment show. I didn't realise I'd forgotten gloves until we got outside. The snow was falling thick and fast. Fortunately there was no wind.

I hurriedly stuffed my hands into my pockets. Will noticed.

"I figured you'd forget your gloves," he said. He pulled out a box, obviously wrapped by a guy, and handed it to me.

"Is this a Christmas present?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. I pulled my hands out of their warm pockets in order to open it. A pair of red leather gloves lay inside the box.

"Will, thanks," I said.

"Welcome," he said. "You always forget your normal ones, so I had Sam charm them so you couldn't lose them."

"That was really sweet of you," I said, pulling them on. They fit perfectly and were surprisingly warm. "So what do you say? First stop, Three Broomsticks?"

"Sounds good to me," he said. We got to the town and made for the pub. It was warm and overflowing with toasting people. We made our way to a table in the back. I slid in first. Rather than take the seat next to me, he sat across from me. That's unusual. Normally whenever we come here during Hogsmeade weekends, he sits next to me. Although, normally, we've got Sam, Dom and Lucy with us as well, if not also Dylan and Al.

Madam Rosemerta came over.

"What can I get you two?" she asked.

"Two Butterbeers please," Will ordered. "And what do you want?" he asked me, teasingly.

"Just the two?" Madam Rosemerta asked.

"Yes please," I said. He's in an unusually good mood. I wonder if he let someone test their Cheering Charms on him again. "What's got you in such a good mood?"

"It's a nice day, nice place, nice company," he said. I raised my eyebrow. Is he implying what I think he is?

I mean, it's no secret that I'm kind of hopelessly in love with him. I wonder if someone told. I never told Sam, so I don't have to worry about him. But I did tell Dom, and Lucy, both of whom might have told Sam, or just as bad, Will himself.

But I can't help it. He's really sweet and absolutely gorgeous. It's the dark hair that's always in his eyes, and the dark eyes with the innocently lost look to them. That and ever since my stupid brother, James, Ly and Em got him hooked on Quidditch, he's gotten fit too. And plus, he's brilliant too. But, we've already had this conversation.

"Nice company?" I repeated. I will keep a straight face.

"You know, just you and me. No one else here to bother us," he said.

"There's always someone to bother us," I said. As if on cue, Madam Rosemerta reappeared with our drinks. I took a sip of mine, feeling it warm me all the way to my toes. Will fidgeted with his.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked, placing my hand on his.

"Kinda," he said, seeming nervous. Okay. I was getting used to the good mood and now it's gone.

"What are you so jittery about?" I asked.

"I was wondering, more, curious, really if maybe, you well, maybe you might, might, I dunno, be my girlfriend?" he asked. I took a moment to sift through all the repeat words until I finally got to the punch line.

"Be your girlfriend?" I repeated stupidly. I sound like an idiot to my own ears. His face fell.

"It's okay, if you don't want to be, it's fine. We can still be friends right?" he said.

"Still be friends?" I repeated.

Will likes me? As more than a friend? That's just…awesome.

I smiled broadly.

"Of course I'll be your girlfriend!" I said. He smiled back, eyes brightening.

"Really?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said. He looked absolutely thrilled by the prospect. I was too. Which means in the grand scheme of our group of friends, we were the first two to be in a relationship. And here we all thought it would be James and Ly…

We finished our Butterbeers in record time and he left three galleons on the table to pay for it.

"So who do you need to shop for first?" he asked, taking my hand. I blushed at the hands thing, but didn't let go.

"Dom," I said.

"So, Honeyduke's?" he asked.

"Honeyduke's," I repeated. "She likes milk chocolate and lavender." I found a huge brick of the stuff near the back and paid for it. Will grabbed the bag before I could. I smiled to myself.

"And Fred, James and Ly you said?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"So, WWW?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Do you get stuff for free?" he asked. "At the WWW?"

"Not directly. But, all of the profits go to my dad and mum, and my allowance comes from them, so, I pay for it, but it comes back to me in the end," I said. He laughed.

"That's quite smart," he said. "I wish my parents did something interesting." This was new. He never talks about his parents. "I mean, my dad works for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement and not in one of the cool ways, and my mum's in the Department of Magical Liaisons. So boring."

"Well, you're not boring," I said. "You're brilliant." I turned red as soon as I'd said it. But, hey. If he really is my boyfriend now, I can tell him that, right?

"Really?" he asked, sounding unsure.

"Well, at least at Transfiguration and Quidditch," I said. He turned pink and mumbled something. "What?" I asked.

"I've heard you sing," he said. When? I only ever sing in the shower…or under my breath. I've never sung in front of people…

"When?" I asked.

"It was this summer. You thought I was asleep," he said quickly. I thought back. It sounded kind of familiar.

"Oh," I said stupidly.

"You were amazing," he said. "Is that what you want to do? Sing?"

"It's all I can do," I said. "I can't actually do anything else." It's true, sadly. My skill set is limited to staying awake during History of Magic and singing.

"Sure you can," he said quickly. "People listen to you, you know."

"No they don't," I said. "Trust me."

He shrugged. We were at the WWW. I pushed open the door and walked in. Even though I'm not a trouble maker, I felt right at home. But that's because I've lived my entire life in a flat above the first store in Diagon Alley. So, all the stores remind me of home.

The manager came up to us.

"Can I help you folks find anything?" he asked politely. I think I'd met him once. I believe he's called Travis.

"What do you have that's brand new?" I asked.

"Well, we just got in a shipment of Everlast Colour Change Ink," he said. So, he doesn't know who I am. That's almost refreshing.

"Yeah. Get Ly and James the Ink they created," Will said. He laughed. I smiled as well.

"No, Travis. I mean, what do you have behind the curtain?" I said. "Behind the curtain" was Dad's term for the products they were waiting to unveil to the public. Travis regarded me curiously.

"How do you know…" he started.

"Roxie Weasley," I said, extending my hand for him to shake. His eyes widened.

"Of course, Miss Weasley. Right this way," he said. He turned and walked away.

"So, by extension, are you, like, his boss?" Will asked.

"I'm not going to inherit the WWW," I said. "Just some stock in it. It's going to go to the Weasley that proves themself worthiest of owning the place. Fred and I will get some of the stock. So will Katie," I added as an afterthought. It's just weird to think I have a little sister now. Still. Even though she's nine months old.

What is with the whole baby gap thing? So, everyone had kids for nine years, then there was no action. And then, all of a sudden, Aunt Hermione gets pregnant again, then Mum got pregnant, then Aunt Audrey got pregnant, then Victoire got pregnant, then Uncle Charlie (maybe someday I'll meet him) gets his girl pregnant, and now we've got an eight year gap between Louis (who used to be the youngest) and then Alex, and Katie, and Susan and Gabby (Vicky's kid) and Uncle Charlie's son. How the hell do these things happen? I'd really like to know.

"So, James then?" Will said. I snapped out of my reverie.

"What about him?" I asked.

"He'll probably inherit the WWW," Will said. I hadn't really thought about it before.

"Yeah, I guess. Especially if he and Ly keep coming up with more products for the store," I said. "Apparently the Ink they made is a huge hit."

"Yeah," he said. "I keep hearing Professor Spinet and McGonagall talking about how they expected that type of stuff to come from Fred and James, not Ly."

Maybe that's why Fred's got such a short temper lately.

"Here you are, Miss," Travis said, pulling back a curtain, revealing a back room. I smiled.

"Thank you, Travis," I said.

"You're welcome," he said, giving me an awkward half bow before returning to the store.

"Okay," I said. "So, just look around for anything interesting, but open the boxes slowly and if they're taped shut, read the instructions first." Will looked disturbed. "You're cute when you're worried."

"I am?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said. I let go of his hand reluctantly and pulled a box off the shelf. It was labelled "Hangover Cure." If there was anyone who needed that, it was my brother. I opened the box slowly. Brightly coloured boxes were inside. I opened one. It had a little potion bottle inside labelled with "Hangover Cure." The instructions said, "Ever had one of those mornings? This little potion will take care of the headache, and bring back your memories of the night before. Use at your own risk, as some of the memories may not be ones you want. Take one drop the morning after and see the results for yourself."

"What'd you find?" Will asked.

"Hangover Cure," I said. "I almost feel like I should get this for everyone in our group, except for Sam who always remembers, and Ly, who doesn't drink."

"I don't drink either," Will said. "Usually."

"The bubbles?" I said. "At the Quidditch party?"

"I did not drink bubbles! I got spiked by Frank," he said. I laughed.

"You seem to get spiked by Frank a lot," I pointed out.

"We all get spiked by Frank a lot," he said.

"Did you find anything?" I asked.

"Yeah, actually. I found a Portable Lake," he said. I followed him over to the box quickly.

"A Portable Lake?" I asked. This could be good.

"Yeah," he said. He pointed to the box. I opened it and read the instructions. "Place one drop of water every three feet for the instant desired effect of a thirty foot deep lake. Clean up requires Portable Desert. The combination of the two will yield the original material upon which the Lake was built."

"That could be good. So, get Ly the lake and James the desert," Will said.

"Yeah," I said. "Should be perfect. Okay, how many of us are there that routinely get drunk at parties and then don't remember anything?"

"Al, Dom, Fred, James, Dylan and Lucy," he said. "Then you and I don't really drink, and Sam always remembers. Ly also doesn't drink, and Rose and Scor don't really go to parties."

"So I need six of the Hangover Cures to put in everyone's stockings so that the parents and more importantly Grandma Molly don't see, and then the Lake and Desert and I'm done!" I said.

"Great," he said. I grabbed the merchandise and headed for the counter. I set them on the counter where Travis rushed to help me. I handed him the money it would take to cover it, plus a tip.

"Happy Christmas, Travis," I said.

"Thank you, Miss," he said, doing the awkward half bow thing again. I rolled my eyes at Will, who laughed and we left the store.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Wait, he asked you out?" Dom exclaimed. "Finally!" We were sitting in the middle of our dorm with Ly, divvying up clothes for the break.

"Anyone seen the blue sweater?" Ly asked.

"Yeah, I think it was under Dom's bag," I said. Dom lifted her bag and sure enough, there was the sweater. She tossed it to Ly who caught it, folded it and stuck it in her rucksack.

"So, you said yes, right?" Dom asked.

"No, I turned him down," I said. "Of course I said yes! I've only had a crush on him for forever." Ly smiled somewhat sadly. I take it that means James hasn't asked her out yet.

"You know, you could just tell him you're in love with him," I said.

"What?" Ly asked.

"James. You could just tell James you're in love with him," I elaborated.

"But I'm not." As one the three of us checked the ceiling. Unlike the last time we'd had a conversation like this, James and Fred were not sitting on the ceiling. "So what if I am?" Ly said. "He doesn't like me that way." Dom and I rolled our eyes.

"Ly, James has been in love with you since you saved his arse and my brother's arse on the train in first year," I said. "Probably best fuck up in reverse I ever made. Chase down my brother for being an ass, and my favourite cousin falls in love."

"Since when is James your favourite cousin?" Dom asked, sounding offended.

"Well, I don't count you as my cousin," I said. "You're just my best friend, edging on sister."

"Oh, well that's okay then," Dom said.

"James doesn't really love me," Ly said. She sounded like she was in denial.

"Ly, if I was to march into the boys' dormitory right now and ask James if he loved you, he'd say yes, turn Weasley red and be horribly embarrassed because he told the truth," Dom said. "Believe me."

"And hey, if Will can work up the guts to ask me out, James should be coming around any day now," I said.

"But it's different with you and Will. Everyone knows you two like each other," Ly said. Dom and I exchanged confused looks.

"Ly, we made a solemn oath not to tell you this, but in this one instance, it needs to be broken," Dom said.

"We've got a betting pool on whether or not you guys are going to go on a date first, or go straight to boyfriend and girlfriend," I said.

"Like you and Will," Dom said.

"Or just hand each other promise rings and have it done with," I finished. Ly turned a red that would have made any Weasley proud.

"Really?" she asked.

"Really," we said in unison. I picked up a grey sweater. Grey is so not my colour.

"Any takers?" I asked.

"Yeah," Dom said, grabbing it.

"So…what do I do?" Ly asked.

"Well, tomorrow on the train," I said. "You wear the blue sweater at the bottom of your bag, and that one pair of jeans with the clovers on them…Dom, help me out here."

"Oh, you mean the Lucky Brand Jeans?" she said. "I think I've got those, hang on." She dug in her bag for a moment before pulling out the jeans I'd mentioned. She handed them to Ly.

"You wear those and you tell him that you like him," I said.

"Or, you could just kiss him," Dom said.

"Easy for you to say," Ly said. "You can just turn on the Veela charm and boys drool." Dom glared at the ceiling as though cursing someone.

"Ly, for the most part, you look more like a Veela than I do," she said.

"That's only because you cut all your hair off, routinely," I said.

"I do not look like a Veela," Ly said.

"Let's see. Curly blonde hair, blue eyes, pale skin, gorgeous, am I missing anything?" Dom said.

"No," I said.

"I'm not-" Ly protested.

"Yes you are," we said.

"You really think that will work?" she asked.

"Positive."

OOooOOooOOooOO

The next morning, we assembled in the common room, animals and bags in tow. Five owls who were none too happy to be in cages, and two equally pissed cats stalked around their cages, waiting to leave. But, no, we were still waiting for the final contingent of boys to join us. Sam was apparently still asleep. Which meant Will and Dylan were trying to wake him up. Ly and James were sitting on one of the loveseats, talking animatedly to each other. My stupid brother was glaring at them. I'm going to see if I can cover that one.

"Excited to go home?" I asked him, sitting down next to him. He turned and fixed me with a withering glare.

"No," he said. "In case you've forgotten, we've got a nine month old baby sister. Who apparently takes after you and likes to scream."

"I do not scream," I said.

"Oh, no, sorry, you call it singing," he said. I don't know why I bother.

"Remember when we had that conversation back in my first year about how I'm not allowed to date?" I said.

"Yeah," he said, sounding nervous.

"Remember how you were terrified?" I said.

"Yes," he said, sounding more scared.

"Remember that feeling and hold onto it," I said. Before he could say anything in reply, Sam, Will and Dylan joined us. Will smiled broadly at me. I hugged him. We haven't kissed yet, but hey, it's only been a week. That's allowed.

"Shall we?" Dom suggested.

"We shall," Ly said, standing up. James seemed sad to no longer be cloistered with her in the comfort of a love seat. Those two, I swear to Merlin.

OOooOOooOOooOO

We reached the train in record time, bounding into the last compartment as always. The guys immediately went for the seats. We really need to get two compartments. We just don't. I don't know why. Once the door was closed, the bags were stacked against the window, providing two extra seats, which Fred and Lucy quickly occupied. Without even thinking about it, I sat on Will's lap. He put his arms around my waist. Fortunately, I don't think Fred noticed, as he was a bit too busy staring venomously at James and Ly. Ly had chosen to sit on James's lap, like Dom and I had told her to. Rose was standing in the middle awkwardly until the train started to move. Dom took advantage of the movement of the train to shove her over so that she landed in Scor's lap. They both turned pink, but Rose didn't get up, which I consider progress.

"May I sit on you?" Dom asked Sam. He looked confused.

"Sure," he said. She did. It was at this point that the door burst open.

"Oh, Merlin," I groaned.

"Hi, Scor!" the newcomer gushed.

"Hello, Fiona," he said.

Let me explain Fiona Finnegan. She is one of the stupidest girls in the history of the universe and is completely enamoured with Scorpius. Like, completely. She sends him things on Valentine's Day and birthday cards and all that. The only time I've seen her demonstrate interest in another guy besides Scor was at the Quidditch party, as she was one of the Hufflepuff girls who ended up drinking tequila off Al's stomach. She would gladly get into bed with Scor no questions asked.

And it is for all these reasons that she disgusts me. Rose and Scor are meant to be, and this girl is too stupid and blind to see it.

"Fiona!" called another voice. Ioan Finnegan appeared in the door of our compartment a moment later. "Fiona this compartment's full," he said, glaring daggers at Scor.

Now, here's why I think Ioan is a prat. He's highly attracted to Rose. Rose as previously mentioned, belongs with Scor. Scor and Ioan don't get along. Scor and Ioan have been known to end up jinxing each other on purpose in Charms over this fact. Scor is aware that Ioan's intentions concerning Rose are not honourable. Ioan only knows that he wants to do dishonourable things to Rose and Scor is standing in his way. Therefore, Ioan is a prat.

"Yeah, it is," Scor said, voice dripping venom. It's always nice when Scor stands up for himself. "Sorry, you'll have to go somewhere else." Neither of them moved.

"He means, fuck off, Finnegan," I said.

"You're not very nice, Roxie Weasley," Fiona said. Have I mentioned I don't like her?

Before anyone could say anything else, I had been dumped into Dylan's lap as Will shot out of his seat and pointed his wand at Ioan and Fiona.

"Get out," he said. Ioan looked at Will's outstretched wand. He started to slowly back away. "You too, Fiona." Fiona started backing away as well. They apparently weren't going fast enough for Will's tastes because he added, "I will turn you both into Flowering Shrubs and give you to Professor Longbottom as a Christmas present if you're not out of here in five. Four. Three," he counted. The two Finnegans took off at a run. Will slammed the compartment door shut and sat back down, looking grumpy. The entire compartment was staring at him in shock and in most cases awe.

"Holy shit," James said. "Where did that come from?" I got out of Dylan's lap and sat back in Will's. Fred noticed this time. He started to turn pink in anger.

"Was that all because Fiona said Roxie wasn't nice?" Rose asked.

Maybe we haven't exactly told anyone we're together.

"Maybe," Will muttered. I tried to contain my smile. Super smart, super cute and defending my honour? I think I'm in love.

"Thank you," I said.

"It was nothing," he said.

"Out of curiosity, do you actually know how to turn someone into a Flowering Shrub?" Fred asked, apparently weighing the probability of that happening were he to tell me to get out of Will's lap.

"Yes, I do," Will said. He seemed to notice the tone behind Fred's question as well as I had.

"Okay," Fred said. He stopped warring with himself and remained seated.

We had another half hour to London before anything else happened.

"James, can I talk to you?" Ly said. Dom and I exchanged brief glances.

"Yeah, of course," James said, sounding confused. Ly took his hand and led him out of the compartment. The minute their seat was empty, Dom bounded off Sam's lap and sat in the empty one. Sam looked lost.

"Twenty minutes," Dom mouthed at me. If in twenty minutes, Ly and James weren't back, we would go looking. I nodded.

Twenty minutes passed.

"I'm going to go to the loo," I said. We had about ten minutes before we'd get to King's Cross. Dom raised her eyebrow. I took it to mean, "should I come too?" I shook my head imperceptibly and walked out. They were two compartments down. James was sitting on the bench closer to the door, staring at Ly intently. She was sitting cross-legged on the bench facing him, so he couldn't see into the corridor. She glanced up when I walked by. I put up all ten fingers. "You've got ten minutes," I mouthed. She nodded slightly. I carried on to the loo. I did actually have to pee. When I came back, I slowed down outside their compartment. This time Ly didn't glance up. James had gotten even closer now, and his hand was on her waist. As I walked by, she leant forward and kissed him. I practically sprinted back to the compartment. I burst in the door and exchanged highly significant looks with Dom. She smiled too.

"What are you so excited about?" Fred asked me. I sat back down in Will's lap.

"Nothing," I said. "I just really had to pee." He looked at me like I was insane but didn't comment.

Maybe this means everything will be perfect from now on.

**Read and review!**


	13. 13: Making Christmas

**A/N: So this is the trauma chapter, rather than the drama chapter. The next chapter is drama. But this is the beginning of the end of a couple things, so I'm sorry.**

**But...0.**

**Chapter 13: Making Christmas (Dylan)**

All I knew was that when Ly and James came back from their "talk," her lip gloss was smudged, and he appeared to be wearing it.

I'm not one to make assumptions, but…I think they totally just snogged.

And it's about bloody time too!

"Fred, you're sitting on my bag," Ly said by way of greeting. We were at King's Cross. Fred also seemed to notice the lip gloss situation. Unlike me, however, he didn't seem thrilled about it.

Now, if we could just get Rose and Scor to do the same…

Snog, that is. Maybe as his best guy friend, I could offer him some manly advice. Not that I'm particularly manly. I mean, I wander around snapping photos of people without their knowledge and use them as blackmail. Like Al. I have a lot of blackmail where he's concerned. Somehow, I doubt his Grandma Molly would be too pleased to see what he gets up to when he's drunk.

And last time he was, it was only partially my fault. I think that's progress. At least he's only corrupting himself now.

"Fred, you're actually sitting on my bag too," I said. He stood up. He glared in the general direction of the door. I guess if I were him I'd be rather pissed at life too. I'm pretty sure he likes Lyra. And I'm pretty sure he doesn't want Roxie dating, and I'm pretty sure she and Will are dating. They haven't told us, but that may have to do with Angry Fred who's come out to play these past few months. I think there's a distinct correlation between Ly and James's emotional closeness and Fred's anger level.

"Well, goodbye all, I'll see you when we come back," I said. I grabbed my rucksack and headed for the platform. Amy waved excitedly at me. I smiled and ran to give her a hug.

"How is my favourite cousin?" she asked.

"Only," I corrected. "I'm your only cousin."

"True," she said.

"And you raised me," I added. "So I kind of have to be your favourite."

"Still true," she said. "Got all your things?"

"Of course," I said.

"Said goodbye to all your friends?" she asked.

"Yep," I said.

"Well, I'm going to say goodbye to mine, if you'll excuse me a moment," she said. To my utter shock, she walked over to Mr Malfoy and a tall black man who had to be Em's father. She shook their hands and then walked back over to me.

"Shall we?" she asked.

"We shall," I replied. We linked elbows and walked off through the platform towards the barrier. We pushed through it into Muggle London. It was a lot colder in Muggle London than it was in Platform 9 ¾. She pulled out the car keys and we got in. It was an ancient Mini Cooper, leather seats and everything. She glanced around surreptitiously to make sure no Muggles were watching and tapped the heater with her wand.

She'd told me on my seventh birthday that she was a witch and that the magical world existed, but also that I was to continue my Muggle education, no questions asked. I spent the next three months lying on the roof watching for flying broomsticks. I became convinced all our neighbours were secretly witches and wizards in disguise. Especially our next door neighbour, Mrs Thomason, who smelled like prunes. There hadn't been a Mr Thomason for as long as I could remember, so I figured she probably chopped him up and used him in a potion. Amy had laughed at this.

We drove off into the city and parked the car in the alley behind the house. I grabbed my bag and ran for the door. There's no place like home.

Per usual, the house smelled like cookies. It's always smelled like cookies. I don't remember much of my life with my mother and father since I was only four when they gave me to Amy, but as long as I've lived with Amy, our house has smelled like cookies. There was also the smell of pine sap.

"You put up the tree without me?" I asked.

"Sorry!" she said. "I didn't decorate it," she added. I ran into the tiny living room. A big green tree sat there. It was naked, so far as Christmas trees go, so I let her off the hook. Under it sat two presents. I smiled and reached into my bag, pulling out three presents of my own and placing them under the tree.

"You don't have to do that," she said.

"What?" I asked.

"Buy me presents," she said.

"Yes I do," I said.

"Oh yeah? And where did you get the money?" she asked.

"I took some photos for a sixth year," I said evasively. She raised her eyebrow.

"Incriminating photos?" she asked.

"Perhaps," I replied. She crossed her arms and looked at me sternly. "He wanted to know if his boyfriend was cheating on him. He wasn't." She rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Fine," she said. "Go put your stuff in your room and then come tell me about your term." I ran up the stairs to my room and flung open the door. It was exactly how I'd left it. My bed was sloppily made, my window overlooked the alley way, and my walls were covered in pictures. Pictures of everything. Like, literally, everything. There were flowers, trees, sign posts, dead birds, the works. Old people holding hands at the ice cream parlour, young people holding hands in the park…all of it. I reached into my bag and pulled out a stack of pictures. I'd developed some the Muggle way and others the Wizard way. Much to my chagrin, most of them were in colour.

I grabbed the tape off my desk and went to work taping them up before I realised I should show them to Amy first. I pulled the picture of Will breathing out bubbles from the wall and walked back downstairs.

"So, how was term?" Amy asked, offering me a plate of chocolate chip cookies and patting the couch seat next to her.

"It was really good. Sam got offered a special Charms internship with Professor Macmillan," I said. "Will got moved up into fourth year Transfiguration and is also working on some project with both McGonagall and Professor Spinet." I pulled out the picture of Sam and Will scribbling in their notebooks at breakfast for her to see. She laughed and placed it on the table.

"I think Will and Roxie are dating now, and James and Ly definitely snogged on the train," I added.

"Any wild parties?" she asked. I looked away. She raised her eyebrow. I pulled out the picture of Will breathing bubbles. This one I'd developed in Wizard style so that the motion of breathing could be seen. She laughed.

"Brilliant," she said.

"I know, right?" I said.

"What about the Veela girl, what's her name…Dominique! What about Dominique?" she asked.

"She's good," I said. "She snogged her Quidditch captain again. The weirdest part of all that is that they don't even like each other romantically."

"And how's Al?" she asked.

"A stick in the mud, as ever," I said. Well, that's not entirely true, but she doesn't need to know about the Quidditch party and its various repercussions.

"Well, at least someone's kept his head on his shoulders," she said. "And how's Fred?"

"Growing more bitter the closer James and Ly get," I said.

"That's such a shame. A girl coming between two best friends," she said.

"Yeah, well," I said. "I think there's nothing to be done about that one."

"It's still a shame," she said. "So. Shall we decorate the tree?"

OOooOOooOOooOO

Christmas morning dawned with the weak grey light I always associated with snow. Quickly, I was out of bed, staring out my window. Sure enough, the ground was entirely covered in snow. And it was still snowing. I grinned happily. There was a whooshing sound from downstairs. I ran down them in time to see Roxie step out of the fireplace.

"Hey, Roxie," I said.

"Hey, Dylan," she said. "Happy Christmas," she added, handing me a bag. It was quite bulky.

"Thanks," I said, sounding confused to my own ears.

"It's all the presents from the Weasley/Potter family," she said.

"Oh," I said. "Wait right there, I'll go grab all of yours." I ran back up to my room and grabbed a large box, throwing all of their presents in. I ran back down and handed it to her.

"Cheers mate," she said. "Oh, and don't open the one from me around your mum." I bit my lip awkwardly.

"I don't live with my mum," I said. I think Al is the only one who knows for sure that I don't actually have any contact with my parents. "But I won't open it in front of my cousin." She looked confused and headed back for the fireplace. "Hey, wait," I said. "Are you and Will together?" She turned Weasley red.

"Yeah," she said, apparently unable to contain herself.

"Really?" I asked. "That's great!"

"I know!" she said. "I haven't told anyone except Ly and Dom, and I don't think he's told anyone either, so it's really nice to have someone know, you know?" I smiled.

"Yeah. It's a Christmas miracle," I said. She smiled and hugged me.

"Happy Christmas, Dylan," she said, stepping into the Floo and vanishing. I quickly dug through the bag and found the box from Roxie. I quickly tore off the paper. The box was emblazoned with "Weasley's Wizard Wheezes Miracle Hangover Cure." I smirked and slipped it into my dressing gown pocket as Amy walked down the stairs.

"Where did all those come from?" she asked.

"Santa Weasley dropped them off," I said.

"Who was it this year?" she asked.

"Roxie," I said.

"Which one is Roxie?" she asked.

"George Weasley's daughter," I said. "Tall, black, blue eyes, fantastic hair."

"Right," she said. "Well, are you going to open your presents?"

"Right!" I said. I grabbed the two from her. I opened the first one. It was a Do-It-Yourself photo developer. It was much more sophisticated than the potion I was currently brewing for myself in the abandoned class room James and Ly had used to make their Everlast Colour Change Ink.

"Thanks, Amy!" I said. "Your turn." I handed her a box. I was very proud of my wrapping job, as I'd done it myself this year, rather than make Al do it. I'd picked it out too.

She opened it warily. The tissue paper threw her for a loop, I think. She pulled out the sweater finally and stared at it in shock. Okay, maybe I didn't pick it out entirely by myself. Lyra may have helped. It had orange and red stripes and was apparently really nice (according to Lyra that is). And orange and red are Amy's favourite colours. She pulled it on instantly. It fit, thank god.

"D, it's beautiful!" she said, hugging me. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome," I said. I grabbed the other box from her. It was slightly heavier than the potions kit. I pulled it open. My jaw dropped.

"No way," I said. "Is it really…"

"Yes it is," she said excitedly.

I'd first seen it this summer in Diagon Alley. Amy had shown up at the Malfoy's sometime in July to take all of us kids on a "field trip" to the Alley in order to let Draco and Astoria have some peace and quiet. There was a new shop near the WWW called Translatable Objects, where they had things with dual purpose – one that worked in the Muggle fashion, another which worked in the Wizarding fashion. They'd had a camera there that took photos in heavily magical areas and also worked in the Muggle way. To a guy who took on average thirty pictures a week and carried around two cameras, it was the most perfect thing in the world.

And now it was sitting in my hands.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" I exclaimed, jumping up and down like a little boy. I immediately wound it and snapped her picture. I started babbling incoherently and handed her the other thing I'd gotten her. She opened it, still smiling at my enthusiasm. It was a photo journal I'd made of all our good times over the years. She turned the pages, smiling, laughing and reacting exactly the way I'd planned to have it go.

"So, do you want to be a photographer when you grow up, or a photojournalist?" she asked when she'd finished the book.

"Photojournalist," I replied instantly, taking another picture of one of my favourite Christmas ornaments. She smiled.

"Well, are you going to open the presents from your friends, or let them sit there?" she asked.

"I already know what they've gotten me," I said.

"How?" she asked.

"Investigative photojournalist," I said, pointing to myself. She laughed.

"So what did they get you?" she asked.

"Rose got me chocolate frogs. Lucy got me a Deluxe Sugar Quill set. Fred forgot to get me anything. Al got me photo paper. James got me a large box of Droobles Best Blowing Gum," I said.

"And Roxie?" she asked.

"Oh. Roxie and Dom got me Levitating Sherbet balls," I said. No harm in a white lie. Besides, that really is what Dom got me.

"That's a lot of sugar," she said.

"Yes it is," I said. "Can we commence our Christmas tradition now, please?"

"Of course we can," she said.

For Christmas every year, we spend the whole day baking every cookie we can think of and making up cookie plates to take to the neighbours. We keep the extras for ourselves and eat them until New Years.

"Go put your presents in your room, except maybe your camera," she said. I turned for the stairs. "Oh, and I've told the Malfoys we'll come around for tea on the twenty seventh!"

"Great!" I yelled back. I love Christmas.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I stamped the snow off my boots and took them off in the back hallway.

"How was your walk?" Amy called from the kitchen. She was baking more cookies for the Malfoys at this point.

"Great!" I said, waltzing into the kitchen, kissing her on the cheek and stealing a cookie. "I'm just going to go develop these and then we can go, okay?" I said, holding up my camera. She smiled and shook her head.

"I've created a monster," she said.

"No, just enabled one," I said. She laughed. I walked upstairs. I opened my bedroom door. There was an owl sitting on my desk. I vaguely recognised it as Scor's.

"What are you doing here, Aegis?" I asked, stroking his head. "What's so important he couldn't wait to tell me?" The owl said nothing, but stuck out its leg. I pulled the letter off.

The first thing I noticed was a bad sign. The normally perfect handwriting of one Scorpius Malfoy was shaky and splotched in places.

The second thing I noticed was an even worse sign. He'd been crying when he wrote it.

I quickly scanned the whole thing, feeling myself get paler as the letter went on.

"Dylan!" Amy called. "How's it coming up there?"

I continued staring at the letter in horrified shock.

"Dylan?" she asked, opening my door. I sank to a seated position on my bed and handed her the letter. "Dylan," she read. "I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it. My mum – they called it _Nà logos_. They said there was nothing we could have done. Ly still hasn't said anything. Dad – Dad hasn't moved. We need help. Please come quickly. Scorpius." Amy sat down next to me and put her arm around my shoulders. "We need to be there. Now," she said, standing up and pulling me to my feet. I nodded wordlessly. I ran past her down the stairs to the fireplace. She lit a fire and threw in the Floo powder. We spun into the Malfoy's main room that had the magnificent staircase in it. Everything seemed darker, somehow. Colder.

A little worse.

And it was silent. Like a tomb.

It was a tomb.

Then there was a noise. A noise that made my blood boil. Amy and I both turned towards the kitchen and stormed in.

Em's dad and mum were staring at each other across the island in the centre of the kitchen. Mr Zabini had his wand outstretched; Mrs Zabini had a knife.

"You are a horrible, horrible woman," he said. "Your sister just – and all you can think about is how it affects you!"

Mrs Zabini laughed derisively. "Don't be stupid, Blaise. I'll stay to arrange the funeral."

"You don't think about other people, Daphne," he said. "You don't realise your brother in law just lost his wife. Or that his children just lost their mum. All you care about is that now you _have_ to go to Switzerland to take care of your parents. What about _your_ children, Daphne? What about your family here?"

"Emerald and Elizabeth are well equipped to take care of themselves," she said. "Not that they need to, since they'll still have you. Although that could be more of a hindrance than a help."

"Daphne, so help me Merlin, I'll-"

"You'll what?" she asked. "You'll jinx me? Fine way to get custody."

Mr Zabini raised his wand. Mrs Zabini raised her knife.

"_Expelliarmus!" _Amy yelled, pointing her wand at both of them. Mr Zabini's wand flew into her outstretched hand. The knife flew across the kitchen and sank into the far wall. Both adults turned to stare at her. As did I. I've never seen her this pissed off before. She was staring at Mrs Zabini with sheer loathing in her eyes.

"Enough," she said. "For as long as I've known this family, for three _years_, they haven't endured a bigger plague than you," she said, pointing her wand at Mrs Zabini. "You're a Slytherin through and through," she continued. "Who never grew out of the War. It's all about blood status for you, and living for yourself and no one else. Well, guess what? I'm done with you. You can hand him the divorce papers and get out, you low life cow. Go take care of your ridiculously wealthy parents in Switzerland. Get your inheritance and disappear, like the smarmy, selfish bitch you are." My jaw dropped. Mr Zabini looked amazed. Mrs Zabini however looked almost as pissed as Amy.

"Who are you to tell me what to do in my own sister's house? You are just some street urchin Draco picked up and couldn't bear to leave crawling helpless through the muck. You aren't worthy to know my family. You aren't worthy to lick the mud off our boots. That's what you are, you know. Amelia Louise Abernathy, daughter of a hair stylist and a pharmacist. Not a drop of magical blood anywhere. How dare you have the nerve to come into my sister's house and tell me what to do," Mrs Zabini said.

"How dare you come into my best friend's house and pretend you care," Amy spat. Mr Zabini looked just as shocked by all this as I was. "All you care about are your money and your reputation. So, leave the papers and get out. Now!" With her outstretched wand pointed at Mrs Zabini's throat, Mrs Zabini seemed to decide Amy was actually a force to be reckoned with. She reached into her purse and pulled out a blue file folder. She dropped it on the island and brushed past me into the great room.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Mr Zabini said quietly.

"What, Blaise?" Mrs Zabini said with venom.

"Two things, actually," he said. "The first being the ring I gave you when you said you'd marry me. The second being, I don't know, saying goodbye to your daughters. Because, so help me Merlin, so long as I'm still breathing, they'll never have to see you again." Mrs Zabini looked affronted, but pulled off the ring anyways. She threw it at him.

"Emerald, Elizabeth, I'm leaving," she called into the otherwise silent house. There was no response. She turned on the kitchen and glared contemptuously at Amy and Mr Zabini before disapparating. Mr Zabini wrenched open the blue file folder and grabbed a quill. He quickly signed his name in a few places and the papers burst into ashes. He seemed to deflate a bit and sat down hard in one of the chairs. Amy handed him his wand back. He took it and dropped his head into his hands.

"I'm just going to sit here and convince myself the past seventeen years of my life were a bad dream," he said.

"Where is he?" Amy asked, all of her anger gone.

"In his bedroom," Mr Zabini said. "I can't get him to eat. Or move. Or say anything. It was so sudden."

"When did it happen?" Amy asked.

"Yesterday morning," he said.

"Oh, god," she said. "Dylan," she said to me. "Go find Scor and Ly and do whatever you can for them. And if you see Em and Lizzie, send them down here to be with their dad." I nodded and headed for the stairs. I knew exactly where all of them would be.

I opened the door to the room Em shared with Lucy and Rose during the summers. Sure enough, there she was, sitting on her bed, holding her little sister while Lizzie cried.

"Dylan?" Em asked.

"Hey," I said. "Lizzie, your dad's in the kitchen. He needs you, okay?" She stood up and rubbed her eyes, looking much younger than eleven. She looked so much like Em in miniature. She nodded and ran down the stairs.

"Is she gone?" Em asked me. I had a feeling she wasn't talking about her little sister, or her aunt.

"Yeah," I said.

"Well, we all saw that one coming, even before Aunt Astoria-"she drew a shaky breath, and I could tell she'd just been holding it together for Lizzie's sake. "Good. I'm glad she's gone. Now we just have to suck the poison out of our lives that she left behind." I sat down next to her and hugged her. "Did you ever know your parents?"

"I don't remember them," I said. "They left me with Amy when I was four."

"And what has Amy told you about them?" she asked.

"Good riddance," I said. Em snorted a laugh into my shoulder. "Where are Ly and Scor?"

"Ly's up in the Pitch. Scor's in his room," she said. "But I'm guessing you knew that."

"Yeah," I said. "Your dad needs you too."

"I know," she said. "He also needs a glass of champagne to celebrate my mother's departure from our lives, and a glass of whiskey to mourn Aunt Astoria." She let go of me and stood up. "Thanks for being here," she said, turning and walking out the door. I got up and headed for the Pitch first. I walked in and sat down in the stands. Ly was on her broom with one Quaffle in her hand. She would throw it through the hoops and then race to get it before it fell to the ground. She kept making shot after impossible shot. She was truly gifted. It took her five more minutes to notice me.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, landing next to me. She looked like hell. She was covered in sweat, mud, grass and was wearing gym shorts that probably belonged to Scor and a green Quidditch shirt that said "Malfoy 06" on it. I think it was probably her dad's. She also looked like she hadn't slept since it happened.

I didn't say anything. She fell into the seat next to me, placing her broom bristles up in front of her and resting her forehead on the handle.

"Do you know what the last thing my mother said to me was?" she asked. I said nothing. "'Lyra, if you say that word one more time, I'm going to wash your mouth out with soap'," she said. "And then I dropped a pancake on the floor and said it again and she walked out. Dad got up to follow her, and she didn't come back," Ly said. She started crying.

"You're going to get hypothermia," I said. She was shaking violently from the cold and form crying. "Come inside." She allowed me to take her by the hand and pull her into the house. She looked more unsteady by the minute. I took her into her room and handed her a towel. I stopped up the bathtub and started filling it with hot water.

"Stay here for a minute," I said. She nodded mutely. I walked back out and ran down the stairs. I walked into the kitchen. Lizzie was sitting next to her dad, holding his hand. Em was standing next to them, fiddling with something that I realised was the ring. I beckoned to her. She nodded and left the ring on the counter. The door swung shut behind her.

"I've drawn a bath for Ly, but I need someone to make sure she doesn't do something stupid, like drown herself," I said, "while I go talk to Scor." We started walking up the stairs.

"I get it. I'm your heavy," she said.

"Well, my cousin is trying to help Draco, Lizzie's working on keeping your dad sane as best she can, and you seem to be the only other person besides me with a head left on your shoulders," I said.

"True," Em said. "Team work?"

"We're gonna need a hell of a lot of it," I said. There was a splash from Ly's room. "Shit."

"I've got it. You go talk to Scor," Em said.

"Thanks," I said. She nodded and ran to Ly's room. I turned to Scor's. I pushed it open and found him lying on his bed, staring catatonically at his ceiling.

"I got your letter," I said.

"Yeah," he said. He sounded like Scor, but there was an edge to his voice. Not like tears, like a metallic edge. Like a knife.

I sat at the foot of his bed.

"I think I've figured it out," he said. The edge was still there.

"What?" I asked.

"How to not end up like my dad," he said. "How to not get broken, and fucked up by love." Scor doesn't swear. Not like that. I stared at him warily, waiting for him to go on.

He didn't, so I asked.

"How?"

"By never falling in love," he said. "Never feeling."

Oh, shit. Oh, shit, shit, shit.

"But what about…" I said. Rose? My head finished for me. But what about Rose?

"Rose?" he asked. Same knife blade in his voice. This is not good. "She'll get over it."

"Will she?" I asked.

"I dunno," he said. "Can't say I really care." I regarded him suspiciously. "It's against my new resolution."

"Not feeling is not a resolution, Scor," I said. This needs to end here and now.

"No, I think you'll find it is. I think you'll find it's actually perfect. If you don't feel, you can't get hurt," he said.

"Scorpius, listen to me," I said. I grabbed him by the collar and forced him to sit up and look at me. "This is not an option. It's the easy way out. It's the coward's way out. You're a Gryffindor, for fuck's sake."

"Maybe I should've been in Slytherin," he said, shaking me off and storming out. This really isn't good.

"Scor," I said.

"What, Dylan? You want me to subject myself willingly to pain? You want me to fucking volunteer? Because that's what will happen," he said. "We'll go out, we'll snog, we might shag, and then she'll realise I'm damaged goods and drop me like a sack of dragon shit. You want me to sign up for that?"

"Scor, Rose loves you. She would never do that to you. She's your best friend," I said.

"No," he said. "She isn't. You are."

"I am?" I asked. That's new. Well, no, I suppose it isn't entirely. I guess it's kind of true.

"Yeah," he said. "Bros before hoes and all that."

In five minutes he's now said "fuck" twice, slandered Rose and then lashed out at the entire other gender. I don't think I'm dealing with Scor. I think I may be dealing with his evil alter ego.

"Mate, this isn't healthy," I said.

"Yeah, well, neither was Mum!" he exclaimed. "Neither is Lyra. Or my dad. Love isn't healthy. It's the worst thing that can happen to you. Look at what it did to Uncle Blaise! He stayed with that awful woman for seventeen years, because of the girl he fell in love with at Hogwarts. How is that healthy?" I didn't say anything. There was nothing I could say.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Dearly beloved, it is with great sorrow that we gather today to lay to rest Astoria Greengrass Malfoy," said the tufty little man officiating the ceremony.

I've never been to a funeral before.

"She was a beloved wife and mother and daughter," he continued. "And she will be sorely missed." It didn't escape my notice that he'd left out "sister" in her list of achievements. Since Amy and Blaise together had planned the event, I'm going to guess they had something to do with that.

"She was an accepting soul and was much loved by all who knew her. Her husband and their two children have sustained a great loss, as have all who knew her. May she rest in peace," he said.

They'd decided on nothing elaborate for the ceremony. It was just the immediate family, which I was shocked to discover included me and Amy. Draco was swaying unsteadily on his feet at the other end of the coffin. Blaise had his hand on Draco's shoulder, and Draco was also leaning heavily on Amy. As the coffin started lowering into the ground, Ly threw her white rose onto the coffin, as did Em and Lizzie. Ly buried her face in Scor's shoulder and cried. I'm glad that despite his horrible new resolution he still feels love for his sister. Although, they are twins, so I suppose he has to. They have almost the exact same DNA.

Lizzie was holding Em's hand and tears were running down both their faces. I could tell by the biting cold on my face that I was crying too.

Astoria Malfoy had always been unbelievably nice to me. Always. I think she liked me.

This one time, it was really late at night and I fancied a cup of tea. I walked into the kitchen. She was there so I figured I was about to get into a lot of trouble.

"Oh, hello, Dylan," she'd said. "What are you doing here?"

"Just came in for a cup of tea," I'd said, swallowing nervously.

"Me too," she'd said. "Shh. Don't tell Minty." I'd smiled. "Have a seat. It'll be ready in a minute."

"Thanks," I'd said, sitting. She smiled at me and poured the tea. She set it on the counter in front of me.

"Cream and sugar?"

"Just sugar," I'd said.

"Chocolate biscuit or regular?" she'd asked.

"What?" I'd asked.

"Do you want a chocolate biscuit, or one without chocolate?"

"Chocolate, please," I'd said. She'd set two on a plate and handed it to me as well, along with the sugar bowl.

And we'd sat there and shared a cup of tea and chocolate biscuits. She'd asked me how Amy was doing, and how I liked school and if I liked any girls ("she's fine. It's fine. No.") and what I wanted to do when I grew up.

She was the first truly nice mother I'd ever encountered. God knows my own didn't count.

And now she was gone.

OOooOOooOOooOO

After the funeral, Amy came over to me.

"Dylan, I need you to go home and get your stuff, and pack me an overnight bag," she said.

"Why?" I asked. I would do it of course, I just wanted a reason as well.

"Because we're going to be staying with the Malfoys for a while," she said. I noticed she was crying as well. At that point it registered that when she'd been giving Daphne the boot she'd said Malfoy Flat was her "best friend's house." And I don't think she was talking about Draco.

"Okay," I said.

"We're going to take Em, and Lizzie and Scor and Ly back to the Flat with Side-Along. You take the car with Gerard," she said.

"Okay," I repeated. She held me at arm's length for a moment before hugging me. I hugged her back and headed over to Gerard.

"Where to, sir?" he asked.

"You don't have to call me that," I mumbled.

"It's my way of coping, sir," he said.

I told him my address and we drove off. I had him park the car in the alley and asked him to wait. I ran up to pack Amy's stuff first. When I was done I headed to my own room. All of the candy wrappers from the stuff the Weasleys had gotten me for Christmas littered the floor. I suddenly felt sickened. They didn't know. None of them knew. They were happy in their big family. It hadn't just been torn apart at the seams. I lashed out violently at the boxing from the Bertie Bott's. Then I stared at my room in confusion.

"I might never come back," I muttered aloud. When Amy stayed somewhere to fix something, she stayed until it was well and truly fixed. And I knew that was what she was doing. She was going to stay at Malfoy Flat with Draco and Blaise until both of them could stand on their own two feet and successfully raise their children.

It's what she was doing with me.

I flew at the walls and started pulling all the pictures down. She'd pack them wrong. I hurriedly placed them in their own box before grabbing everything I'd brought with me from Hogwarts. I threw it all into my bag and grabbed Amy's off the floor. I took one last look around and closed the door.

I ran down the stairs as fast as I could and out into the bitterly cold air of the alley. I opened the car door and climbed into the back seat.

"Do you have everything, sir?" Gerard asked. He sounded stuffy, and I knew it wasn't from the cold.

I stared out the window for a moment, memorising the back of my childhood home.

"Everything," I repeated. Such a final word. Did I have everything? No. I didn't. "Everything I can take with me," I said.

He started the car and drove away.

**Read and Review!**


	14. 14: Kiss and Control

**A/N: And this is where the truly bad shit commences. Sorry. **

**Warning: Sex. Nothing particularly explicit since I can't write genuine smut to save my own life, but I didn't actually try here. So nothing X rated, but there's still sex. **

**Chapter 14: Kiss and Control (Lyra)**

On the train, I sat with Em, Lizzie and Scor. Dylan tried to sit with us as well.

"No," Scor said. "We need you to go tell them that we're sitting with Em and Lizzie."

"And what excuse would you like me to give them?" he asked.

"Anything but the truth," he replied.

"Am I allowed to use the divorce?" Dylan asked Em.

"Yeah," she said.

"Fine," Dylan said, walking out. I felt kind of bad about kicking him out, but this was a family thing. Family mourning.

Yeah, Dylan was part of the family in a way, but not by blood. I'm not normally one to care, since my chosen family is based on so much more than blood, but right now…right now it matters.

None of us said much of anything on the train ride to school. Blair escaped from his cage, and Em let her cat, Trafalgar, out as well so the two could play together. Trafalgar is frightfully intelligent for a cat. I think she must be at least part Kneazle, if not fully.

And then we were at Hogwarts. We made a quick dash for the carriages before the Weasleys and Potters could catch up to us. I wanted to talk to James, but that would have to wait.

During the feast, Scor and I sat at the very end of the table. Well, at least, I did. Scor disappeared part way through the feast. I didn't see him again. He has me worried. He's acting like an automaton. That and the only emotion he's shown since-since it happened has been utter contempt for affection. He should be sobbing in Rose's arms, but he's not. It's like he's become emotionless since Mum…

"Gryffindor Quidditch team!" Liam yelled down the table. "Fall in!" He started marching out of the hall, expecting us to follow. I groaned and got up, leaving my untouched food behind me. Dom, James, Fred, Jack and Larry were already with him when I joined them. James smiled broadly at me. I tried to smile back but couldn't. Liam marched us through the entire school until we got to the Gryffindor common room.

"All of you," he said. "Bed. Now. We start practice tomorrow."

"But Liam. Tomorrow's Saturday," Larry said. "I have to drink on Saturdays."

"Larry, you're an alcoholic," Liam said. Huh. I wonder if that's true. Wouldn't surprise me, I suppose. Half the games we've played, he's been so hung over it's a miracle he stayed on his broom, much less kept the Quaffle from going through the hoops.

"No I'm not. I just like to go out with my friends on Saturdays and get drunk, because it's the only day of the week when I can," Larry said.

"That is why your performance is abysmal. Your Quidditch playing of late makes mothers cry," Liam said. Mothers crying…I don't feel well. My stomach made a horrible noise that sounded like a combination of a dying cat and a thunderstorm. My heart was making a worse noise though.

Suddenly my mouth tasted like soap.

"Excuse me," I muttered before sprinting for my dormitory.

"Ly!" I heard James call after me. I ignored him and kept running. I burst into our lavatory before vomiting everything I'd eaten in the past week up. At least, that's what it felt like. I flushed the toilet and sat down next to it, crying. My mother can't cry at abysmal Quidditch playing anymore. My mum can't cry about anything anymore.

According to Amy, who somehow got Dad to talk, Mum's last words weren't that she would wash out my mouth with soap, but that she loved Dad. I'm glad at least that the last thing she ever did was tell Dad she loved him, rather than berate me for saying "shit" three times at the breakfast table.

"Ly?" Dom's concerned voice asked from the other side of the door. "Are you okay?"

"Bad oyster," I said.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Do you want me to bring you anything?" she asked.

"No," I said. "I think I'm just going to stay here until it passes."

There was a pause.

"Okay, but if you need anything, let me know," she said. I nodded, even though I knew she couldn't see me.

After about forty minutes of sitting on the bathroom floor, I was fairly certain I wasn't going to throw up again. I got up and brushed my teeth slowly and methodically before washing my face.

It was something ridiculous like seven thirty, but I figured I'd follow Liam's orders and go to bed anyways. I crawled into my bunk and fell asleep.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Lyra, why do you always have to try to irritate me?" Mum asked.

"Mum?" I asked. "Mum?" She put her hands on her hips.

"Who else would I be?" she asked. I ran towards her and threw my arms around her. She seemed shocked and surprised by this display of affection. "Is something wrong?"

"I had this terrible dream that you died," I said, not letting go of her. "And I didn't tell you I loved you," I added. "I love you, Mum."

"I love you too, Lyra," she said, sounding confused. "But you know I really did die, right?"

"What?" I asked, taking a step back. She looked just like Mum at first. But then she started aging in front of my eyes.

"I'm never going to be this old," she said, looking like she was fifty. The aging process zoomed along. "Or this old," she said at around seventy. "Or this old, however old this is," she said as she turned into a haggard old crone, all of her hair gone.

"Stop it," I said. "Stop it!"

"I can't," she said. "It's not like it's going to happen to me. It's never going to start." I closed my eyes and when I opened them all that was left was a skeleton.

"Mum?" I asked. "Mum!" The skeleton just lay there. "Mum!"

I woke up in a cold sweat. It was some time in the middle of the night. I could hear Dom breathing to my right, Rose to my left. Lucy was wheezing in her sleep, but no noise came from Roxie's bed.

Warily, I walked into our bathroom and ran the hot water for a while before getting in the shower. I don't know if it was to get rid of the cold sweat, or the chills, but either way I needed one.

The hot water felt like fire to my skin. I realised only then that I was freezing. I never used to get cold, but ever since…ever since the accident, all I am is cold. I'm never warm anymore. I just lie there, freezing cold and doing nothing about it.

All of us got broken in our own personal ways.

I don't think Scor is ever going to tell someone he loves them again. Because that's the last thing he said to Mum. "Love you, Mum." "Love you too, Scor."

Dad, I don't think Dad is ever going to stop loving her.

Me…I'm never going to intentionally piss someone off again.

I'd knocked over my coffee, to start off breakfast with a bang.

"Shit," I'd muttered.

"Lyra, language," Mum had said.

"Sorry, Mum," I said. Breakfast had continued and been a relatively quiet affair until Dad asked about Quidditch.

"Quidditch? Well, it's just stupid. Larry's a drunk and I would be a much better Keeper than him, but Liam refuses to see it! It's shit!"

"Lyra, if you use that word again, I'm going to wash your mouth out with soap," Mum had said.

"Sorry, Mum," I'd said, reaching for another pancake. Which I managed to drop on the ground. "Ah, shit," I'd muttered. There was a clatter of forks on plates as Mum stood up abruptly, threw her hands in the air in her, "I can't deal with you" hand gesture and stormed from the dining room. Dad had set his napkin on his chair and rolled his eyes at me or Mum, I'm not really sure which, and followed her out.

Then, "Astoria?" he'd exclaimed. "No. No! Stay with me!"

At this point, I think, was when she told him she loved him. Because when I got to the kitchen four seconds later she wasn't-she was-

Merlin, I need someone to talk to.

I need James.

I got out of the shower and pulled on clean pyjamas. The stone floor was cold on my feet. They were numb in minutes.

I pushed the door open and started tiptoeing down the stairs. In the common room, I could see I wasn't the only one still awake. Roxie and Will were sitting on one of the couches having a quiet conversation that seemed to be going something like, "No, I've got to go to bed."

"No, you don't," Will said. "Tomorrow's Saturday." She smiled and kissed him. Neither of them noticed me. "And, besides. I just got back from my project work with McGonagall and Spinet only now."

"Well, whose fault is that?" Roxie asked.

"Not mine," Will said, kissing her again. She smiled and pulled him closer.

I kept walking.

I'd reached the boys' stairs when the Portrait Hole swung open. My brother came through and stretched like he'd just accomplished something. Given how he's been acting lately, that worries me. There are all manner of really questionable things he could've just accomplished that I don't want to know about. I ducked under the stairs and he walked past me, never the wiser to my presence. I waited until I heard his door close and made my way onto the stairs again.

I got to the fourth year boys' dormitory and knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in," a muffled voice called. I walked in. Oddly, there were no snoring noises.

I immediately tiptoed to James's bed and pulled back the curtains. It was empty, which made me feel like crying more.

"He's not here," said the same voice who had let me in. I recognised him as Fred.

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He's having a duel with Frank over the fucking stereo. Again," Fred said. "They'll come back piss drunk and best of friends in about an hour."

"No seconds?" I asked. The hangings on Fred's bed pulled back.

"They never use them. You have to understand, this stereo business is pretty much a monthly argument they have," he said. "The whole idea of using a second is just irrelevant at this point."

"And where is everyone else?" I asked. "Jasper and Mark and Tommy?"

"Tommy's drinking with his brother," Fred said, "since Larry, shockingly, declined to follow Liam's order to bed. Jasper and Mark decided to go to the Tower looking for women."

"And you didn't go with them?" I asked. Talking is nice. Even if it is to Fred, rather than James.

"Nah," he said. "That would've necessitated walking past my little sister snogging someone," he added. I nodded. "Well, have a seat. Don't just stand there awkwardly." I felt like I should smile, and I tried, but failed, before sitting down next to him.

"Thank you," I mumbled.

"For what?" he asked.

"Being here," I replied. He put his arm around my shoulders.

"I'm always here for you, Ly," he said. "You just remember that. If you ever need someone to talk to-"

Suddenly, I realised that I really didn't want to talk. I needed to connect with another human being on more than just an emotional plane of being. I needed to feel close to someone in ways that would make me warm up. Keep my fingers from turning blue.

That was my rationale behind my move.

Point A). Fred was warm.

Point B). He was right there.

Point C). He already had his arm around me.

It was barely an inch turn to press my lips to his. They were warm and dry and soft, all of which made them more inviting.

There was a sharp intake of breath, that I realised came from him. He put his hands on my shoulders, either to push me away or pull me closer, I wasn't sure. He did neither, so I pressed my lips to his harder. This seemed to force him to take action.

He pushed me away.

"What are you doing?" he asked. He was breathing harder than he had been a minute ago. I was too, I noted absently.

"I believe it's called kissing," I said.

"Yeah, but, you were kissing _me_," he said. Is he blind? Of course I was kissing him.

"And?" I asked.

"You know it's me, right? Fred Weasley," he said. I don't understand what he's getting at.

"Okay…" I said. He still looked confused.

"Why?" he asked.

"I need a reason?" I asked. He looked lost.

"Well…yeah," he said.

"Because-" I don't really have a reason, I suppose.

But I needed to be as close to him as I possibly could.

I put my hands on the back of his neck and pulled him towards me, pressing my lips to his again. This time he reacted, kissing me back. That's better.

I opened my lips a little and lightly touched his bottom lip with my tongue. He hesitantly did the same.

You'd expect snogging would be kind of gross with the whole tongue thing, but in reality it puts butterflies in your stomach and kind of makes you weak at the knees.

But I needed more. I needed skin.

My hands left his neck and I ran them down his back, sliding my fingers under the hem of his shirt. My hands were cold enough that he got goose flesh where they ran across his bare skin. I used my new handhold to pull him even closer to me. He moved without resistance, placing his hands on my lower back as well. I still needed to be closer, more skin. I pulled on the hem of his shirt, pulling it toward his head. He stopped kissing me and instead stared at me in confusion, like he'd never seen me before.

Honestly, he'd never looked sexier. His dreadlocks didn't permit his hair to be messy, but if they could've, it would've been. His eyes were dark and his lips seemed slightly swollen.

He stared me in the eye long enough to realise I knew what I was doing. I pulled his shirt off and dropped it.

I'd seen Fred without his shirt on before, during Quidditch practice, after Quidditch practice, during the summer on particularly hot days when all the guys took their shirts off, but before I hadn't really been looking. His chest and stomach were covered in lean muscle that seemed perfect on him.

I went back to kissing him. He groaned when I put my hands on his chest. I realised my hands weren't cold anymore. I also realised a serious flaw in my plan.

My hands were the only exposed part of my body. I wasn't going to get to feel his skin if all of mine was covered up. Rolling my eyes at myself, I reached down and pulled my own shirt off. His breath hitched and I realised he was staring at my chest. I realised at the same moment I'd neglected to put on a bra when I got out of the shower.

It was also at that point that I realised I didn't care.

I put my hands on his neck, kissing him again, but at the same time, pulling him closer so that all our exposed skin was touching. At this point, it seemed ridiculous to remain seated, so I lay back on the bed with him on top of me. He was breathing shakily, as was I. I could feel his heart pounding in his ribcage.

His lips left mine and he started kissing down the side of my neck.

"Fred," I whispered. He was kissing my shoulder now. And all I could think was, "Fred, I-I need you." He stopped kissing my collar bone and stared me in the eye again.

"As in…" he muttered, his voice heavier somehow. I nodded, breathless.

Because, that's the closest you can get to someone, right?

"Like…now?" he asked. To make my intentions clearer, I undid the drawstring on his trousers and slowly started pulling them off. His eyes closed momentarily, and when they opened again, they were pure black in what I then realised had to be lust.

"Are you sure?" he asked. I said nothing but grabbed his hands, guiding them to the waistband of my pyjama pants. He was breathing harder now.

I stared him in the eye. "Yes," I said. "I'm sure."

OOooOOooOOooOO

Forty minutes later, I was wrapped in a warm cocoon of bliss. There was a throbbing ache between my thighs, but I knew that would fade eventually. But I was warm for the first time since the accident and I'd spent a whole forty minutes not remembering my mother. I know it sounds horrible, but it was heaven. For forty blissful minutes, my family wasn't broken. Hell, for forty minutes, I didn't have a family, and for at least three of those minutes, I couldn't have told you my name.

"So…" Fred said, pulling the blankets closer around us. As any good Quidditch player knows, sweat + cold air = very unpleasant. "Was that any good for you? At all?" I nodded against his chest. "Really?" he asked. He sounded excited.

"Really," I said, still somewhat breathless.

"Great," he said, and he sounded like he genuinely meant it. I smiled lazily against his chest.

From outside was the sound of drunken singing. I sat up in shock, holding the sheet to my chest.

"Who is that?" I asked.

"That? Just Tommy coming back from drinking with Larry," he said. Sure enough, the door opened. However, the off-key singing wasn't by Tommy.

My heart constricted rapidly in my chest and I felt like I couldn't breathe. I'd suddenly remembered why I'd come to the boys' dormitory in the first place, and remembered that it wasn't to lose my virginity to Fred Weasley. It was to talk to someone. Someone who wasn't Fred.

Someone who's heart I was about to break.

"Hey, Freddy!" James said. I heard him trip drunkenly over something and catch himself on Fred's bed post.

There was no way out.

"Frankie's passed out in the corridor and I need a hand-" he started, before he pulled back the curtain. I watched him take everything in, from the clothes that were lying at the foot of the bed, to Fred lying there with his shirt off, to me sitting there holding a sheet to my chest with what I'm sure qualified as perfect, 10 out of 10 sex hair. His sweet, innocent hazel eyes met mine, and I'm sure they could read the guilt as plain as if he had just seen the whole thing.

"L-L-Lyra?" he asked, his brow furrowing in confusion.

I suddenly understood Fred's earlier line of questioning.

"_You know it's _me_, right? Fred Weasley_." He was making sure I wasn't having an episode that meant I thought he was James.

"James, I-" I started to say. But what could I say? I'm sorry that I kissed you on the train and just shagged your best mate? It's because my mum died and I needed someone, anyone to hold me, and you weren't here, so I jumped the first available guy?

James dropped the curtain and turned and ran. I grabbed my shirt from the end of the bed and flung it on, pulling on my pyjama pants as well, not bothering to try and find my underwear.

I ran out the door and down the stairs, catching up with him right before he got to the Portrait Hole.

"James, wait, let me explain, please!" I said, grabbing his arm. He shook me off.

"Explain what?" he asked. "Why you…why you kissed me on the train? Why you shagged my best mate? Why you didn't write me once all break? Why all of a sudden you can't even smile at me?"

"I kissed you on the train because I l-because I lo-" I started.

"Are you trying to say it was because you loved me?" he said, staring at me incredulously. He looked like he was about to cry. I was already crying.

"Yes," I whispered.

"Yeah, hate to break it to you, but when you love someone, you don't turn around and shag their best friend," he said. "What's your excuse for that? That you love Fred too? Is that it?"

"No," I said. "I don't love Fred."

"Oh, great. So you kiss the guys you love, and have sex with the ones you don't. That's great logic," he said. "So what's your next try going to be? You were having an episode? Yeah, you were having an episode and just miraculously thought he was me, right? News flash - you're not due for another episode until March."

"I'm sorry," I whispered. "I'm so, so sorry. I fucked up."

"Yeah, you did. Big time," he said. He was staring at me like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. "So come on. What's your excuse? Should I test you, make sure you aren't relapsing? Because I think that's the best you've got by way of excuses."

"I went looking for you," I mumbled. "But you weren't there."

"No, I wasn't. You could've waited for me to get back," he said.

"Well, maybe waiting for you to get back drunk wasn't worth it!" I said. He stepped back like I'd slapped him.

"I waited every day for an owl from you," he said. "And no, the first time we talk since the train, we're having an argument about whether me being drunk or you sleeping with Fred was worse."

"Fine then," I said. "Test me. Ask me any one of your stupid easy answer questions." I regretted it the moment I'd said it. But I couldn't take it back.

He thought about it for a second. "Who's your best friend?" he asked, his voice coming out as a whisper.

I hated myself the minute the words were out of my mouth. I wished I could take them out of the air and stuff them back in. Anything to keep the pain off of his face that I'd put there. Because instead of telling him the truth, "James Potter," I said someone else's name.

I fixed him with a withering glare. "Rose Weasley," I said, before turning and walking up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. I opened my door and glanced back to see him standing exactly where I'd left him, looking broken to the core. I wanted to do nothing but run back down the stairs and throw myself into his arms and kiss him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but I didn't have that right anymore.

I stepped into my room and closed the door, falling into my bed and pulling the covers over my head before I started to sob.

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	15. 15: You're My Best Friend

**A/N: So, yes. Nothing good happens in this chapter either. I'm such a terrible person. Sorry. Warning: scenes of a sexual nature. No actual sex, but definitely a little bit of sexiness. Unfortunately, not with the right people. **

**Chapter 15: You're My Best Friend (Rose)**

"Lyra, what happened?" I tried again. She wouldn't move. She kept her pillow over her face and shook her head.

"Ly, we've got practise," Dom said.

"I am _not_ going," Ly said. "I can't face them."

"Face who?" I asked. She shook her head again.

"Ly, Liam is going to murder someone if you don't show up," Dom said.

"Well, snog him so that he doesn't because I'm not going," Ly said, finally pulling off the pillow and sitting up. Her eyes were red and puffy. Her lips were swollen. Her hair was a mess. And I think she had a hickey on her neck. Dom and I exchanged worried glances.

The dormitory door burst open. Roxie came tumbling in.

"Well, Quidditch practise has been postponed," she said.

"It has?" Ly asked eagerly.

"I wouldn't be too happy about it. You're not going to like the 'why'," she said. "Glad you're talking now though."

"Why was practise cancelled?" Dom asked.

"Because James and Fred kinda got in a duel during breakfast and are in the Hospital Wing," she said.

"Got in a duel with whom?" I asked.

"This is the bad part," Roxie said, biting her lip. "They got in a duel with each other."

"James and Fred…got in a duel…with each other?" Dom repeated.

"Yeah," Roxie confirmed. Ly groaned and put the pillow back over her face, before falling over again. "And there's something else, too…" she said with a significant look at me.

She'd been witness to my bad morning. I hadn't gotten a lot of sleep because I'd spent most of the night up waiting for Scor to show up so I could give him his Christmas present.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Uh…" she looked incredibly pained.

"What?" I asked.

"Scor was kinda…snogging…Fiona…" Roxie said. Disgust coloured her features, but my vision went red.

I waited up for him until midnight.

To give him a Christmas present.

And he never showed.

And now he's…now he's snogging Fiona Finnegan?

"Where?" I asked, sounding pissed off to my own ears.

"In the Great Hall," Roxie said, sounding nervous. "Rose, don't do anything stupid," she said desperately.

"Oh, I won't," I said. "I'm highly reasonable and intelligent, remember?" I grabbed his Christmas present off my bedside table and stormed out the door.

How dare he? He knew I was in love with him. I was pretty damn sure he was in love with me too. But snogging Fiona Finnegan?

He didn't even stop in to say "hi" to me.

I got to the Great Hall and saw it immediately.

There he was, leaning over the Hufflepuff table, stuck at the face to Fiona. I marched towards him and tapped him on the shoulder. He unglued his face and turned around to face me.

"Can I help you?" he asked. There was a biting metallic note in his voice. And then there was the way he was looking at me like I was unworthy to lick mud off his shoe.

"Can you help me?" I repeated. I raised my eyebrow in disbelief. "I dunno. Maybe not, since the last time we talked we agreed to meet in the common room on the day after break and exchange Christmas presents, and someone never showed up."

"No, I didn't, did I," he said, the edge still there. "Sorry. I was a bit preoccupied."

"Oh yeah?" I asked. "What was more important than your best friend?"

"My best friend?" he asked blankly. "Oh, baby, I was with my best friend all right." I felt my face grow hot. This is not Scor.

He winked at Fiona, who blushed. She blew him a kiss.

"Baby?" I repeated. Before I could say anything else, another pissed voice exploded from the Ravenclaw table.

"Malfoy!" Ioan Finnegan yelled. Scor rolled his eyes and turned lazily to face him.

"Yes, Ioan?" he asked.

"I need to have a few words with you," he said. "In private," he added menacingly. Scor shrugged.

"I'm all yours," Scor said.

"Entrance Hall," Ioan said. "Now." He turned on his heel and started for the door, Scor striding past him easily. I made to follow. "Not you, Rose," he said.

"No, I'd like to hear what you have to say," I said. He nodded grimly. Scor was standing there, arms crossed, examining his nails in a wholly unconcerned, wholly un-Scorpius way, tapping his foot.

"I haven't got all day, Finnegan," he said. He didn't acknowledge my presence.

"Then I'll make it quick," Ioan said. "Did you defile my sister?" Scor thought about it.

"Define, 'defile'," he said.

"Touch her inappropriately," Ioan said. Scor snorted.

"Oh yeah," he said, like it was some great accomplishment. Ioan turned beet red.

"Did you-did you shag my sister?" he asked, obviously trying not to yell.

"For most of the night, yeah," Scor said, seeming pleased with himself. I felt my jaw drop. This can't be happening. I-I really thought he liked me. I really thought he cared about me.

"Who are you and what have you done with Scorpius Malfoy?" I demanded. Whereas Ioan was trying not to yell, I didn't bother. I was shrieking.

Until quite recently, I would've crumpled in anguish at the thought of losing Scorpius as a friend. But given the way he was looking at me, and acting, it just pissed me off to be in his presence.

"I'm all Scorpius, babe," he said. "Just ask Fiona."

"Stop calling me that," I said.

"Why?" he asked, smirking. "You want me, don't you? You're like 'my girl,' or something, right?"

"Yeah?" I asked. "If I'm 'your girl' then why did you spend your night fucking Fiona?"

"Because, babe, have you seen her tits?" Scor said. My jaw dropped.

"You're despicable," I said. Before I could say anything else, Ioan flew past me, tackling Scor to the ground. They seemed to wrestle for a minute until Scorpius came out the victor, holding a bloodied in the face Ioan by his collar.

"You really think you can beat me, Finnegan?" he asked.

"I can always get to you other ways, Malfoy," Ioan said.

"I'd like to see you try," Scorpius said.

"Oh, you're on," Ioan said. Scorpius punched him in the face and Ioan crumpled to the ground.

"I'm not supposed to be your girl," I said finally, shaking in rage. "I'm supposed to be your best friend." Scorpius looked up at me and gave me the once over with impassive eyes. He shrugged.

"I suppose it could be worse," he decided. "You could have a fat ass."

"You arrogant pig," I exclaimed. "Never talk to me again," I said, grabbing the present from the floor where it was. I hurled it at his head, where it made a satisfying thudding noise. He looked genuinely confused for a minute. This was long enough for me to draw my wand and point it at him.

"Now move," I said. He looked almost concerned.

"Whatever you say, baby," he said, standing up and stalking back into the Great Hall. I pointed my wand at Ioan.

"_Enervate_," I whispered. He sat up, looking confused.

"Did he just knock me out?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"No wonder my face hurts," he said, experimentally rubbing his jaw. "Well, thanks for coming to my aid." He got up and started walking away. And then I realised. If Ioan could get to Scorpius in other ways, so could I. I could destroy him.

I wanted to destroy him, with the same methodical integrity he'd used to destroy our friendship.

And then it occurred to me. If I was going to make Scorpius hurt as much as he'd just hurt me, there was one perfect person to do that with.

"Hey, Ioan!" I called, running to catch up to him.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Do you have a date for the party at the end of the month?" I asked.

"The one in the Tower?" he asked. "No. I've never been to one of those parties." I put on my best blushing and awkward face.

"Would you like to maybe go with me?" I asked. He looked thrilled on the outside, but on the inside, I could see he was also calculating.

"Sure, Rose," he said.

"Great!" I said. He smiled at me. I smiled back and ran back upstairs to the Gryffindor tower, letting the façade slip slowly off as I did. By the time I got back to my dormitory, I was pissed.

"He is so dead!" I yelled, slamming the door shut behind me.

"Who?" Dom asked.

"Scorpius Fucking Malfoy," I said, spitting out each word like I was extracting venom from a wound.

"What did he do?" Roxie asked.

"Fiona Finnegan," I said. Both Roxie and Dom's jaws dropped.

"He didn't," Roxie said. "I mean, I knew he'd snogged her, but to shag her. Ew."

"Yeah," Dom agreed.

"And then he wouldn't stop calling me 'baby' or 'babe'," I said.

"So what'd you do?" Roxie asked.

"Well, then Ioan got involved," I said. "And he and Scorpius got in a fight that Scorpius won. So I threw his Christmas present at his head and told him never to speak to me again." I fumed for a minute. "He said he'd shagged Fiona because of her tits."

"Could you please stop talking about my brother and shagging people?" came Ly's muffled voice. I'd forgotten she was in here. And that she was obviously having a terrible day.

"We'll stop talking about Scorpius shagging people," Dom said, patting her foot.

"No. Don't talk about my brother, or about shagging," Ly said. Roxie, Dom and I exchanged looks.

"Ly, what happened?" I tried again. She mumbled something into the pillow, and I realised with horror she'd started to cry again. "What?" I asked, feeling all the anger evaporate off me. She moved the pillow.

"I shagged Fred," she said. My jaw dropped.

"Ew," Roxie said. "Why?"

"Because he was there, and I couldn't find James," Ly said.

"That's kind of a shit reason," Dom said.

"Because I needed someone to talk to about what happened over the Christmas holidays," Ly said.

"What happened over the Christmas holidays?" I asked.

Ly started crying again. "My mum died."

OOooOOooOOooOO

He should have come to me for help. He shouldn't have gone off with Fiona Finnegan. He shouldn't have called me those names. He should've stayed my best friend.

But he didn't.

Which is why, for my date with Ioan, I "borrowed" a dress from Lucy, who was a size smaller than me, and wore heels and a push-up bra to the party at the end of January.

I'd sent everyone else on ahead, so that I could meet Ioan outside without their knowledge. I found him standing forlornly outside the Tower, with no clue if he was in the right place or not.

"Hey!" I said brightly, hugging him. He hugged me back a little awkwardly.

"Hi," he said. He did a double take. "Oh Merlin. Is this a formal event?"

"The level of formality depends on how drunk you get," I said. He looked shocked. "It's Gryffindor territory. We throw wild parties." I walked over to the wall where the door would appear.

"Welcome to the Tower," said the mysterious woman's voice. I think it might actually be Teddy metamorphmagused into a woman, but I can't be sure.

The door appeared and swung open.

"You need an in, or an invitation," I explained. "It wouldn't let you in before because you didn't have your invitation with you."

"What's my invitation?" he asked.

"The company of a Weasley," I said brightly, taking his hand and leading him inside. The usual dark, hazy atmosphere greeted us. Loud music was playing inside.

The old Rose would've made straight for one of the balconies and tried to avoid trouble until she saw one of her friends leaving, at which point she'd follow them quickly.

New Rose, however, was going to march into the dance floor, procure alcohol and dance dirtily with a cute boy. And make absolute, one hundred per cent sure that Scorpius saw her.

I looked around and noticed Al and Dylan, both of whom had a bottle. I wound my way through the crowd towards them, dancing up next to Dylan and wresting the Firewhiskey from his grasp.

"Hey!" he said.

"Share with Al!" I yelled over the music. He shrugged and took Al's bottle, took a brief chug and then handed it back. I wound my way back over to Ioan, who looked a little shell shocked.

"This will take the edge off," I said, handing him the bottle. He looked at it uncertainly. "Well, go on."

"Here goes," he said, taking a brief swallow from the bottle and coughing. I smiled and took the bottle back.

I'd tasted the stuff before, and I wasn't really sure if I liked it or not. I was a Weasley, so the chances were I would both, a) greatly enjoy the stuff and b) be able to hold my liquor quite successfully.

I pressed the bottle to my lips and took a swig. It burned going down my throat, but not enough to make it unenjoyable. Then it hit my stomach and warmed me up with something akin to liquid courage. It was a nice feeling. Almost like I could do anything.

And now I understood perfectly why all my cousins and friends got drunk at these things.

I took another drink and looked around, handing the bottle back to Ioan. It was only eight, so the night was still very young. Dom wasn't even drunk enough to be making out with Liam yet.

Roxie and Will, however, were making out, but they're dating, so that's okay. They were off on one of the balconies too, so they weren't even disturbing anyone. I think they were also dancing, but mostly just snogging.

I didn't see Ly or James or Fred, all of whom, it appeared, had neglected to come to the party. I think it's because in order to come to the party, they would've all been in the same room and that doesn't happen anymore. When Madam Pomfrey let James and Fred out of the Hospital Wing, it seemed to be the arrangement that James was still allowed to hang out with all of us, as long as Ly wasn't there, and that Fred had to get lost. It's kind of depressing actually.

Sam was dancing with Dom in the crowd. And I think I saw Em and Lucy sitting in one of balconies with their legs dangling off, sharing a bottle of some alcohol or another. I'm glad they're friends.

But the person I was really looking for was at the centre of the dance floor, standing behind Fiona Finnegan while doing a really dirty dance.

That's exactly where I needed to be.

"This stuff is really kinda good," Ioan said. He seemed to be unsteady on his feet. Perfect. Makes this whole thing easier. I took the bottle back and had another, bigger drink from it. I'm gonna need it.

"Hey, wasn't it just your birthday?" Ioan asked.

"Six days ago," I replied.

"Cool," he said. "Mine was in November."

"November's a nice month," I said. "It starts snowing then. I like the snow." I figure I can play Old Rose for a while before I show my hand.

"January's a nice month too. There's a lot of snow in January," he said.

"I know!" I said brightly, handing him the bottle again. He took another drink from it, swaying a little more. I didn't know the stuff was that strong. I took another drink and was shocked to say I remained unfazed by it, except for the liquid courage bit.

"Let's dance," I said enthusiastically, grabbing his hand and dragging him onto the dance floor in perfect view of Scorpius and Fiona. Fiona had brought over some of her Hufflepuff friends, who were now also dancing around Scorpius. I grabbed Ioan's hands and placed them on my waist. I put my hands on his chest and we started swaying in time to the beat. It was one of those awkward songs between a slow dance and a fast one.

But then that song was over and it was a fast song. Ioan grabbed my hand and spun me so that I landed back in his arms with my back to him. Well, this fits perfectly into my plan. I put one arm behind his neck and held onto his other hand, pressing his palm to my thigh, right below the hem of my dress. I believe the appropriate verb for what we were doing was "grinding." Old Rose never would have done it in a million years. Old Rose also wouldn't have looked through the shuffling throng of people to catch the eye of the guy who'd hurt her in order to make sure he was watching.

He was.

She also wouldn't have turned around and snogged her date soundly right then and there, taking his hands and placing them on her arse.

I kind of like being New Rose.

She's bold. She's sexy.

And in all ways superior to Old Rose. Because New Rose was hell bent on revenge and wasn't going to get hurt getting that revenge.

And also because New Rose had a really cute guy sucking on her neck when Old Rose had been kind of a prude.

Okay, I really like being New Rose.

I pushed Ioan back through the crowd until we hit the wall. He quickly side-stepped around me so that I was pinned between him and the wall. I was perfectly okay with that, because it meant I could see through the dancing throng of people that Scorpius was still watching us.

"Do you want to get out of here?" I muttered into Ioan's ear. He was currently kissing my jaw. He stared at me with lust filled eyes.

"Yeah," he said, grabbing my hand and leading me towards the door. I glanced back over my shoulder as we left, just long enough to make sure Scorpius was still watching when I put Ioan's hand on my breast and snogged him as the door closed.

He was.

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	16. 16: The Whore War

**A/N: Hey there, everyone who probably currently hates my guts. No, it doesn't get better yet. No, Scorpius doesn't stop being any of the many colourful adjectives you sent me. But you get to hear his own opinions on the matter. Here. Now. I'm not sure if that makes it acceptable or not. **

**Warning! More coarse language than usual. I know that the majority of the reason for this piece's M rating is because of language, but this chapter gives good reason to it. **

**Chapter 16: The Whore War (Scorpius)**

Yes, I was now a grade A, prime choice ass hole.

Mission accomplished.

I'd severed ties with Rose, who was, at this point, the only girl who could hurt me.

And it was kind of funny to watch her try.

The whole Ioan thing? She had no idea that he was using her just as much as she was using him.

Then again, maybe I'm discrediting her intelligence and she knew exactly what she was doing.

The only problem with my new life style choice is that I think I still felt something for her. For Rose. And that was going to have to go.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The morning after the party, I made my way down to the Great Hall for breakfast at precisely the same time that Rose and Ioan left the Ravenclaw dormitory. Together. I smirked to myself and let them reach the Great Hall ahead of me.

Fiona tried to catch my eye when I got there, but I ignored her and sat down at the Gryffindor table with all the guys. Well, except for Fred. He'd distanced himself from the group. Especially from James and Ly. Can't say I blame him. Because if I were James, I would've done more than jinx him.

I would do to him what I planned to do to Ioan.

And actually, I think I might do something bad to Fred as well for touching my sister.

Oh, that's disturbing. I know exactly where Ioan is coming from. Some guy shags your sis, so you try and get back at him. Except, I don't really have a problem with Fred. So, he'll have to wait.

"Hello, Scor," said a bubbly girl's voice behind me. Fiona.

"Hello," I said, not turning around.

"Well, aren't you going to even look at me?" she asked.

"Why?" I asked. "I know what you look like." I heard her huff in indignation and storm away. Dylan was staring at me reproachfully. I poured my coffee and said nothing. Sam was scribbling in his notebook, per usual, and Will seemed to be asleep in his cereal. Another late night for him and Roxie then.

"Malfoy," said a voice from close by. I rolled my eyes and turned to face Ioan.

"Yes, Finnegan?" I asked.

"Now," he said, pointing at the door.

"No," I said. "Sorry. I'm drinking my breakfast," I pointed out, gesturing to my coffee mug. "It'll have to wait."

"No, it's going to be now," Ioan said. I sighed laboriously and followed him into the Entrance Hall. He gestured to an empty classroom.

"Really, now?" I asked. "Ioan, if you want to shag me, you're going to have to wait your turn."

He opened the door without a word and pointed me in with his wand. I sighed again and walked in, crossing my arms and tapping my foot again.

"You want to duel?" I asked.

"No," Ioan said. "Just talk."

Oh, this should be good.

"Then talk," I said.

"I shagged your girl," he said. "How does that make you feel?"

Honestly? It pisses me off and makes me very many different shades of jealous. But he doesn't get to know that. He doesn't get the satisfaction of knowing he's gotten to me. Because he has. He hit where it still hurts, hurts just enough to bother me.

"I don't feel anything for girls, other than the desire to shag them," I said. At least, that's what I'll be telling myself from now on. Because girls hurt you. Love is dangerous.

The broken look on my dad's face is going to be seared into my brain forever.

I never want to have that happen to me.

"She was naked in my bed screaming my name," Ioan continued. I kept my face from moving at all. If I don't show any reaction, maybe he won't bother her again.

"How nice for you," I said. "But you know, I'm kinda glad she gave it up to you, so that she'll stop following me around."

This seemed to throw him.

"Gave it up…you mean," he said, his brain whirring. "You mean the two of you never-"

She didn't tell him she was a virgin?

Maybe she really was using him more than he was using her.

"I never laid a hand on her," I said, smirking at the disturbed look that crossed Ioan's face. "Makes victory just that much more sour doesn't it."

He still seemed to be trying to figure out how he'd gotten played.

"But she said-"

"Did she? Did she say it? Or did you assume it?" I asked. From the look on his face, he'd obviously just assumed. "I recommend you stop trying to get even with me, since it's not going to work. You'll just get hurt." I turned to leave.

"What about my sister?" he asked, regaining his voice.

"Oh, yeah. Make up some excuse," I said. "Tell her you made me break up with her, or something."

"You're just…ditching her?" he asked.

"Ioan, she may have a fantastic body, but the girl's an idiot," I said. He looked pissed.

I like winning.

"Funny. Sounds like Rose," he said quietly. Apparently, the momentary flash of anger on my face made him quite happy.

"Two problems with that," I said. He raised an eyebrow, inviting me to continue. "One, Rose is much smarter than you and you know it. Two, Rose doesn't have a fantastic body." At least, the Rose I know doesn't. She wears uniform skirts and sweaters and always wears her robes.

"Well, you're wrong there," Ioan said. "Because, she's pretty hot underneath all those layers."

That's it. I leapt off the desk I was sitting on and pinned him to the wall by his throat. He laughed.

"Looks like I got to you after all didn't I, Malfoy?" he said. "Now I've just got to get even."

"Even?" I spat.

"You know, a sister for a sister," he said. "A twin for a twin."

I pressed him harder into the wall.

"Lyra would never touch you," I said. And she wouldn't. I'd make sure of that.

"We'll see," he said ominously. "After all, we've still got three and a half years left here, haven't we?" He threw me off and turned to leave. "Oh, yeah. And isn't she sick?" he asked. "Doesn't she have these periods where she doesn't remember basic information and doesn't act like herself?" I glared at him in pure hatred. "See you around, Malfoy." He slammed the door shut behind him, leaving me to storm around in a rage, kicking desks over.

If he even looks at Lyra, he's going down.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Shockingly, even though I was now an asshole, the fact that I was on the market seemed to have transmitted among the girls at school and by March, I'd been out with three more girls, and slept with two of them. It was kind of mind numbing. In a good way.

But I definitely still had some unfinished business that sat in front of me in most of our classes. Ever since Ioan had pointed it out, I found myself staring at her in highly inappropriate ways.

I was going to have to do something about all this.

So after class, I grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her into an abandoned classroom. She stared at me with pure hatred in her chocolate brown eyes. Hatred. I can work with that.

"What do you want?" she demanded. In response, I advanced until her back was pressed to the wall. I put my hand next to her head, effectively trapping her.

"I've got to give you credit," I said. "I didn't think you had it in you."

"What?" she asked. "The ability to strike back?"

"No," I said. "The ability to lie to Ioan like that."

"Lie? To Ioan?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said. "You see, the idiot thought you and I had had sex, which is why he even wanted you in the first place."

Her face flushed in anger.

"You and me?" she asked. "That's funny."

"I'm not laughing," I said. "See, he seemed to be under the impression he was hurting me by fucking you."

"Well, then I guess he was wrong, wasn't he," she said, crossing her arms. This slight motion made me glance down momentarily. And, let me just say (since I'm now a cad and an asshole and a pig and can get away with saying things like this) Ioan may have been right about her body.

"Yeah," I said, staring her in the eye. "Yeah, Ioan was misguided. But you weren't." She raised her eyebrow at me. "You knew exactly what you were doing."

"I often do," she said. "In fact, the only thing I've done since I started Hogwarts that I wasn't sure of was when I thought I actually liked you as a person."

I tsked. "Happens to the best and the worst of us," I said. "You think you know someone and then they just…let you down."

"Believe me," she said coldly. "I know."

"There's just one thing I can't figure out," I said.

"Well, I always was smarter than you," she said. I ignored her.

"Why? What exactly _were_ you doing with Ioan?" I asked.

"Well, as previously mentioned, I shagged him," she said. The little green monster in my stomach roared angrily. I need to muzzle that thing. Seriously.

"Yeah, but what's your game. You knew exactly what you were doing, but I'd like to know what that was," I said. I want to know what I'm up against. Because, Ioan doesn't scare me. Rose does.

"My game? It's not my game," she said. "It's yours. And I'm going to beat you at it." I must have looked confused because she smirked.

"And what game is that?" I asked.

"The, 'I can be an emotionless whore' game," she said. "You know, I think we might have something there…"

"What?" I growled. "What do we have?"

"I think we've got ourselves a Whore War," she said. She seemed pretty pleased with herself. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go win." She tried to shove past me, but I grabbed her wrists with one hand and pinned them to the wall above her head. Consciously, I had nothing to do with the fact that my knee also stuck itself between her thighs, further pinning her to the wall. I can't say I minded too terribly though.

"You're not going to win this one, Rosie," I said. She laughed derisively. I can't believe this. I'm not even affecting her. I breathed on the neck of this one Ravenclaw and her knees gave out.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that," she said. "See, you don't even affect me. But I affect you." She glanced down pointedly.

Curse my traitorous male genitalia.

"So we'll see," she said. She pulled her wrists out of my grip and pushed me away from her, grabbing her bag off the floor. She opened the door to the classroom and walked out.

Oh it's on.

A pretty girl, possibly a Ravenclaw, I think she was in my year, walked by the door. I seem to remember her name being Hélène.

"Hey, Hélène!" I called, catching up with her in the hall.

"Oh!" she said, looking around as though she was making sure I was talking to her.

"Can I carry that for you?" I asked, gesturing to her bag.

"No, it's ok-" she started to say. But I fixed her with my best, "I honestly want nothing more in this universe than to carry your bag" look. "Okay," she said, somewhat breathlessly, handing me her bag. I smiled and slung it over my shoulder.

This "Whore War" as Rose called it?

I'm going to win.

It'll be like taking candy from a baby.

**Review!**


	17. 17: Breakeven

**A/N: Okay. So, I'm a terrible person. I think I've established that with the last few chapters. Now then, I would like to apologize in advance, since I won't actually be updating again until Tuesday. This is because I will be at my uncle's college graduation in Santa Cruz, rather than in my own home with my computer. Fortunately, there's sort of some kind of resolution in this chapter. Not of anything major, or good, but it's the end of what I call the "Great Schism" set up. The split still exists, but this is the end of it getting set up. So, yeah. To everyone who reviews frequently, I love you guys. All of you. And I'm sorry for not updating again until Tuesday. **

**Chapter 17: Breakeven (James)**

"Malfoy! Potter! Weasley!" came Liam's voice. Oh this should be good. "Changing rooms! Now!"

Dom stood up to join us but Liam waved her down.

"No, Dom," he said. "I need you to collect O'Brien and Townsend and drag them to the full team meeting at ten."

"Gotcha, Captain," Dom said, sitting back down.

What could he possibly hope to communicate in an hour that he couldn't have told us in the five months since January?

"Other Weasley!" he yelled, glaring pointedly at Fred, who was in conversation with Frank, his new best friend. Good, because I'm done with him. Forever. After the whole Lyra thing.

The next morning at breakfast, we'd kind of gotten in a fight.

"It's not like you'd exactly laid claim," he'd said.

"Yeah, actually, I kind of had," I'd replied. He'd raised his eyebrow. "We kissed. On the train before the Christmas holidays."

"Yeah?" he'd said. "Well, we had sex. After the Christmas holidays. After your precious kiss. Guess it can't have been that memorable. Kissing you, that is."

"Fuck you," I'd said.

"No, sorry," he'd replied. "That's Lyra's job."

And even as mad as I was at her, it made me furious that he was talking shit about her. Which is why I lunged across the table and decked him. Then he hit back and it turned into a full blown fist fight. It took the combined efforts of Will and Liam to pull me off him, and Frank and Roxie to restrain Fred. The professors hadn't noticed anything was wrong yet.

"I'm fine," I said, shaking them off. They let go somewhat reluctantly. Before anyone could react, I'd pulled my wand on Fred and cast a Jelly-Legs Jinx on him. He fell to the floor, his knees incapable of holding him up before he cast the Tickling Hex at me. Fortunately, I'm not ticklish.

We both went to retaliate, but I found myself staring into the business end of Sam's wand. Will had his wand pointed at Fred. True best friends, who had each other's backs with anything.

"James, if you move again, Sam's going to make you think you're a six year old girl for the rest of your life. I'll get Lily to braid your hair," Will had said, gesturing down the table at my little sister, who looked shocked. Fred sneered at me. "Fred," Will had continued. "You move again, you'll spend the rest of your life unable to breathe through anything but fish gills. I sincerely hope you're on good terms with the merfolk."

"You wouldn't. You're dating my sister. You wouldn't Transfigure me," Fred had said.

"Correction," Will had said. "I'm in love with your sister, who would forgive me." All involved glanced at Roxie, who turned pink and tried to hide a smile.

Somehow, at the same time, Fred and I decided we could take Sam and Will before they Charmed/Transfigured us and still be able to fight each other.

We were both very wrong.

I don't remember thinking I was a six year old girl, but when I woke up in the Hospital Wing three days later, there were indeed braids in my hair and more than a few crayon drawings that looked like the ones Lily had drawn when we were kids. A few bunks down from me was a bathtub full of water. I could see Fred's head below it.

Professor Macmillan was staring at me in concern.

"James," he'd said.

"Yes?" I'd asked.

"Oh, good," he'd replied. "You've only been responding to Sally for the past three days."

I must have looked terrified because he elaborated.

"Sam's handiwork. I think he may be a bit too good at Charms sometimes," Macmillan had said, scratching the back of his head. "It took me three days to reverse."

"Is he in trouble?" I'd asked. It was my own damn fault and Sam had just been living up to his end of the bargain.

"No," Macmillan had said. "McGonagall and Alicia – I mean, Professor Spinet – weren't going to punish Will, so it was only fair they didn't punish Sam."

"Fair enough," I'd said. "So…does he have to spend the rest of his life with gills?" I may have sounded a bit too excited about that.

"Probably not," Macmillan had said. "Will's as good at Transfiguration as Sam is at Charms, except with an amazing grasp of human-animal transfiguration laws. Almost like he's-well, that's not important."

"Almost like he's what?" I'd asked.

"Almost like he's well on his way to being an Animagus. Which is ridiculous of course," he'd said. "Anyways, you're free to go, now that Sally has left. But, uh, if you feel any desire to play with dolls over the next few days, let me know."

OOooOOooOOooOO

And since that moment, I hadn't spoken to Fred. Which would have been fine, except for the Ravenclaw-Gryffindor Quidditch game. Which we lost. Badly. And it was our fault. Me, Fred and Ly. Because of us, we'd have to get 300 points in the Slytherin game today just to place second. If we wanted to win, we needed 500 points. Long story short, we're fucked.

"In," Wood said, pointing at the changing rooms. We filed in, not looking at each other and sat down.

"Look," he said. "I don't know what happened between the three of you-"

"I do," said a familiar voice from the showers. Will walked out, pulling a shirt on. He'd apparently been down at the pitch for an early morning practise session. I think he hopes that since Larry will be gone next year that Lyra will get Larry's spot and Will can take hers.

"Corner, what are you doing here?" Wood asked.

"Me? Just practising," he said. Suspicion confirmed. He sat down on one of the benches and pulled his shoes towards him. "Don't let me get in your way." Liam shrugged and turned back to face us.

"I don't know what happened between the three of you, but there is no way it's more important than Quidditch. There is nothing personal that can transcend Quidditch. Quidditch is a place for professionalism, a professionalism the three of you have been severely lacking!" Wood yelled the last line. All three of us jumped. "I have my own personal issues, you know. And I don't let that affect my game. This is my last game at Hogwarts. I handpicked this team, except for Townsend, and I expect you all to behave like a team! You are my Chasers. You have to work _together_. Which you haven't done. Last game? That was some of the worst teamwork I've ever seen. You know why? Because you didn't work together!"

We all shifted uncomfortably in our seats. It was very true. We'd actually done everything we could to avoid each other.

"And quite frankly, I don't know what to do with you!" Wood continued. "I picked the three of you for Chaser because you worked like a perfectly oiled machine, but you don't anymore!" he said. Will cleared his throat hesitantly. I'd forgotten he was here.

"Captain, if I may?" he said. Wood looked too shocked to say no. "Okay, I do know what happened between the three of you, and I also know that it's got to be really hard to put behind you, but you're going to have to. The captain's right. He's got personal shit, he's even got personal shit with his Quidditch partner, but they still work well as a team. Yeah, at almost every single party at the Tower, he and Dom get drunk and they snog, but when it's time for a game, they work together to save all of your sorry asses. Yes, James, your best friends betrayed you. Yes, Lyra, your mum died. Yes, Fred, you did fuck up, but when it comes time to get on your brooms and get the fucking Quaffle from Slytherin and throw it through the fucking goal posts, none of that can matter. You can't let it affect your game!" Wood was staring at Will in slack-jawed admiration. Lyra, Fred and I were just staring at him in shock. Suddenly I knew what I had to do.

"Captain, if I may?" I said. Wood stopped staring at Will and looked at me. "I've got a solution."

"What, Potter?" he asked.

"I'll resign," I said. "That way, you've got people who don't really have anything against each other playing Chaser."

"Potter, you're the best Chaser in the entire school. Sit the fuck down," Wood said.

"That might not be strictly true," I said, with a pointed glance at Will, who got awkward really fast.

"No, I'll resign," Lyra said. "I'm not even a Chaser really." Wood stared at her in shock.

"Then what are you?" he asked.

"I've always played Keeper," she said. "So, really, Will should take my place."

"No, he shouldn't," Fred said, speaking for the first time. "I'm the weakest link. Always was."

"Well, we can't argue with that," I said. Fred looked like he wanted to punch me. "But really, it's okay. I'll just g-"

But my declaration of departure was cut short by Dom, O'Brien and Larry arriving. Larry was suspended between the two of them. They dropped him on the bench, where he giggled to himself.

"Wow he's shitfaced," Will said.

"Wh-wher-wha-" Liam spluttered in a rage.

"He's not fit to play," Dom said.

"Shockingly," O'Brien said. "He got drunk yesterday. I think we're all surprised, aren't we?"

"You're a smarmy git," Dom said to O'Brien. He shrugged.

"I just don't party," he said. "And that is why," he added, pointing at Larry.

"What are we going to do, Captain?" Dom asked.

"Well, considering all three of my Chasers have offered to resign and my Keeper is unfit to play, I suppose we'll have to concede the match," he said, glaring at us.

Wait…

"No we don't," Dom said, suddenly gripped by manic energy. She stared at Will for a few seconds. "Yeah, James, Fred and Ly can't play nicely with each other, but Larry can't play at all."

"What's your point?" Liam asked.

"Your solution is staring you right in the face, using puppy dog eyes, I believe," Dom said. Liam looked at Will who looked really excited.

Of course! Why didn't that come to me immediately?

"I can suck it up and play with Fred if Will's our third," I said. Will smiled.

"What? So I'm just…gone?" Lyra asked.

"Larry can't play at all," Dom said, emphasizing every syllable. A flicker of recognition passed across Lyra's face.

"So I'll play Keeper, and then Will, James and Fred can play Chaser," she said. Liam looked confused.

"How do I know you can even play Keeper?" he asked her.

"We spent the entire summer practising at her house," Dom said. "And neither James, Fred nor one of Slytherin's Chasers could make any goals past her." Liam stared at Ly in confusion.

"In fact, the only one who could was Will," Dom continued.

"I think this is a crazy plan," Liam said.

"Oh, come on!" I insisted. "Slytherin's centre Chaser, Emerald Zabini, spent the summer practising with us. She'll have based the entire Slytherin strategy on the way Ly, Fred and I worked together, and all their attacking formations will be based on Larry's being drunk and disorderly. But she knows she can't get any past Ly and that Will's fantastic. We fly out with this line-up and their Chasers will be as good as dead in the water."

"It's true," Ly said. "If Jack can buy our Chasers the time to score 35 goals and then catch the snitch, we've won."

"35 is a tall order. And it's 35 goals more than whatever comes through our hoops that we need," Liam said.

"Believe me, Captain," Ly said. "Nothing gets past me." Liam looked pained, but then Larry sprinted past him into the bathroom to throw up and he settled on looking resigned.

"Fine," he said. "Suit up. You," he said to Will. "Do you think you can fit into Larry's robes?"

"If I can't I can just Transfigure them," he said.

"Great. Well, I've got to go let the announcer know about the change in line up. Dear Merlin I hope this works," he said, leaving the changing rooms.

"I can't believe you guys actually got that to work," Jack said.

"Don't catch the snitch until we're three hundred and fifty up," Dom said. "Or so help me Merlin, I will beat the shit out of you with my Beater's bat."

"Okay," Jack said, looking disturbed.

"Now, for the plan. Fred, you get the Quaffle from Lyra and pass it to James who dodges through the centre of play and gives it to Will, who scores," Dom said. "I'll be assigned to defend the two of you. Liam can make sure their Seeker doesn't catch the snitch before us. Jack, you-"

"I don't catch the snitch or get in trouble in anyway," he said. "Got it."

I think Dom should definitely be captain next year.

Liam returned and she gave him the breakdown. He seemed impressed. I think he may have also reached the "Dom should be captain" conclusion.

"Well, we're on, so let's do this," he said. We marched onto the pitch to general cheering.

"Flying for Gryffindor is, well, that's new!" the announcer said. "Playing Beater is Dominique Weasley and Captain Liam Wood. Playing Seeker is Jack O'Brien. Playing Keeper is Lyra Malfoy," he said, sounding shocked and confused. I could see Em's face in the Slytherin team grow pale. "And playing Chaser is James Potter, Fred Weasley and Will Corner!" Em looked terrified. Perfect.

Professor Spinet, the referee, opened the case. The Snitch and the Bludgers were up. Liam went to shake the Slytherin captain's hand. Em started laughing in hysterics. Like, hyperventilating hysterics.

"What's wrong with you?" the Slytherin captain asked her.

"We haven't got a snow ball's chance in hell," she said. Their captain looked concerned, and Liam smiled at him.

Then the Quaffle was up. I caught it immediately and flew towards the Slytherin goalposts. Will was about a third of the way down the pitch from them. I made directly towards him, throwing the Quaffle at him. He grabbed it with ease and shot off for the goals.

"Gryffindor scores!" yelled the announcer. "Ten zero for Gryffindor!" The Slytherin keeper threw the Quaffle back to Em in bad humour. She zipped down the pitch before throwing it to one of her teammates. He caught it and then continued on towards the goals Ly was guarding. He aimed and threw. Ly looked supremely bored and plucked it out of the air, dropping it to Fred. He caught it and came at me. I grabbed it as he flew past, before he started to circle back towards the Gryffindor posts. I took off and dropped it to Will, who executed a perfect throw through the left goal post.

"Twenty zero, Gryffindor!" the announcer yelled.

Dom's strategy turned out to be a perfectly oiled one, working as flawlessly as one of Sam's memory charms (Like the one that turned me into Sally the six year old girl). This meant that their Seeker didn't catch the snitch. Our Seeker didn't catch the Snitch. None of our players got bludgeoned by the Bludgers, while quite a lot of theirs did. It also meant we hit thirty five goals in forty five minutes. Jack cheered, because it meant he could get in the game.

Did I mention the score was three hundred and fifty to zero?

And that in the time it took Jack to actually catch the Snitch, we'd kind of gotten a few more goals? Because it took him a half hour. And our system worked so flawlessly that by the time he caught the Snitch –

"O'Brien of Gryffindor catches the Snitch! Gryffindor win!" yelled the announcer. The entire red clad side of the stand rushed the pitch and threw us all onto their shoulders. Professor Longbottom, our head of house, led the charge.

And also, there was this new school rule put into effect that the House that won the Quidditch Cup got the same number of house points added as the number of points they'd scored at the winning game.

"Seven hundred points to Gryffindor!" Professor Longbottom yelled excitedly, jumping up and down in excitement. Professor Spinet started jumping around excitedly next to him. I knew she'd been a Gryffindor but I didn't think she still cared. As the crowd of our classmates carried us up the stairs towards the Tower, I think I even saw Professor McGonagall smile.

Once the Tower doors closed behind us, we were crowd surfed towards the centre and dumped there, before someone passed some Firewhiskey our way.

"Team picture!" Dylan yelled, pushing his way to the circle around us, camera outstretched. I found myself shoved in back with my arm across Will's shoulders, Fred on his other side, Jack on the other side of him. In the front, kneeling, was Ly, then Liam, then Dom. All seven of us had huge stupid grins on our faces. The camera flashed. The crowd cheered. Roxie broke through the circle and threw herself into Will's arms, not touching the ground herself, and kissed him passionately. The crowd laughed or cheered them on, or in some cases, both. Then Dom and Liam were snogging as well. That's new. They normally only do that when they're both drunk. And then, some random fifth year girl melted out of the crowd and grabbed Jack by the collar before dragging him off through the crowd. That left me, Fred and Ly. I sighed and ducked into the crowd, looking for the nearest bottle of Firewhiskey.

Maybe I can put it all aside when I'm playing, but sooner or later reality catches up to you.

And reality, as Will so succinctly put it, is that both my best friends betrayed me.

It takes more than one Quidditch game to fix that.

**Review!**

**PS: Oh, yeah. I should probably explain the chapter names. Chapter 13 is called Making Christmas after the song from A Nightmare Before Christmas. Chapter 14, Kiss and Control is from the title of an AFI song. Chapter 15, You're My Best Friend, is from the Queen song. Chapter 16 was actually an original title. This chapter is from the Script song, Breakeven. Just saying. Sorry, I know, random. **


	18. 18: Chocolate

**A/N: So, here's me updating. Sorry I didn't this weekend. I was too busy discovering that it doesn't really matter how much SPF 60 you put on yourself, when you're from a place where it's generally called Maytember and Juneuary rather than May and June and the majority of your ancestry is Norwegian, English, Irish and Scottish, you will sunburn. Painfully. So, therefore, I apologize for not updating sooner, since it would've been a much less painful way to spend the weekend. **

**Warning: Erm...lewd content and sex. Not like the Fred and Lyra chapter, but, still. Sex. But mostly just swearing. **

**Chapter 18: Chocolate (Will)**

I finished my third year of Hogwarts on a definite high note. I was Quidditch saviour, I had a girlfriend who was as close to perfect as you could get, I didn't have to deal with being in what counted (for me) as remedial Transfiguration, and I'd actually done it.

I'd only done it once, but I'd done it.

I was so fucking sore the next day though.

Turns out, forcing 5'10" of person into the shape of a dog is really uncomfortable at first. McGonagall says it gets easier, that it stops hurting. But the first couple transformations are going to suck. Also, that under no circumstances was I to try this summer.

And I was okay with that, because I still kept finding fur in places. Just, random fur. Fortunately, most of that had been in my hair, so it just looked like I was moulting, rather than shedding.

The Shakespearean insult, "You dog!" just got personal.

Because, I, Will Corner, am now officially an Animagus. The ultimate challenge for a Transfiguration nerd.

And the OWL students don't know it, but the article they had to read from _Transfiguration Today_ at the end of the year about the transmutation between inter-species respiratory systems, yeah, I wrote that. Giving Fred gills had kind of inspired me. And fortunately, none of it was against the Ban on Experimental Inter-Species Breeding. Because it was just switching respiratory systems. Which, it turns out, is perfectly legal. Good job too, because otherwise I'd kind of be in a lot of trouble.

But I'm not.

There is, however, a part of my personality that now belongs to being a dog. But that's okay with me. Professor Spinet took a picture of me when I transformed. He's kind of cute for a dog. I was never really a dog person before, but now I am. Probably because I am, well, a dog.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"I wish we didn't have to go to the stupid family reunion," Roxie muttered angrily from where she was sitting on my lap. In a highly unusual move, we'd commandeered our own compartment, near our friends, but with some privacy. We weren't going to see each other for two whole weeks. That's a really long time.

Stranger still, Dom and Liam had their own compartment somewhere near us as well, and I think they may have been snogging. Without the influence of alcohol. If she's not captain next year, it'll be Jack and he's a prat. Which would suck.

Larry had become the laughing stock of the Gryffindor house. Which has to be a bad way to end seventh year, but he deserved it. Although, I can't say I'm exactly angry that he got too fucked up drunk to play, since it meant I got to.

You know those fifty five goals we scored? I scored thirty of them. Thirty. In my first game. Somehow training with the best does good things for you.

"I wish you didn't have to go either," I said, kissing her cheek. I breathed in deeply. I love the way she smells. She smells like chocolate. I like chocolate. She dropped her head back onto my shoulder. If I craned my neck just right, I could kiss her. She smiled when I did.

"You're so lucky you only have to see your family at Christmas. And that there's only four of you," she said. Well, I'm not going to argue with her on that one. My family has never been exactly warm. My parents, both Ravenclaws, are both workaholics for the Ministry. Which meant my childhood involved a sister who was two years younger than me and Ministry provided day care.

"At least your family's cool," I said, kissing her again. She smiled and slid off my lap. I must have looked like a confused puppy dog for a second before she put one knee on either side of my lap and sat back down, kissing me again. I ran my hands through her hair and pulled her closer. She smiled at me and giggled.

"What?" I asked, trying not to sound too offended.

"You're cute," she said.

"Oh," I said. "Right." She smiled at me again and kissed me some more.

"Oi!" said a very loud voice from the door of the compartment. Roxie immediately jumped off my lap and glared at Fred. Haven't seen him around since the Quidditch game.

"Fred," I said, resisting the urge to smash my head against the seat. Fred cleared his throat and looked down pointedly. I looked at what he saw and turned bright red, crossing my hands as covertly as I could over my lap.

"We're here," Fred said, glaring at me again. I sort of understand why he hates me, since I'm dating his little sister and everything, but I saved his ass during the last Quidditch game, so therefore he owes me at least a little respect.

"Great, thanks, fuck off," Roxie said. I had to smile a little. She winked at me. "I'm not going to see my boyfriend again for two weeks, so if you don't mind pissing off while I say goodbye."

"Mum'll murder you if you get pregnant," Fred said, starting to walk away.

"Sorry about him," Roxie said.

"It's okay," I said. It probably is too.

"I've got to go," she said, looking depressed about it.

"I'll see you in two weeks," I said, kissing her again. She smiled and kissed me, running her tongue lightly across my lip.

"Don't have too much fun while I'm gone," she said. I shook my head.

"I won't, don't worry," I said, kissing her again.

"Roxie, now, please for the love of god," Lucy said, walking by and grabbing her arm. "We've got baby siblings to deal with, remember?"

"Right," Roxie said. "Bye, Will. Love you!"

My jaw dropped in the manner of a gaping fish as she walked away.

"Love you too," I said, sounding numb to my own ears.

"Hey, loverboy," said Dylan, popping his head into the compartment. "Cover up, for god's sake man!"

"What?" I demanded, standing up and pulling on my jacket, zipping it up. "It's not my fault."

"Yeah, I know," Dylan said. "We should go."

"Right," I said, grabbing my trunk. Dylan and I were met on the platform by a woman who had to be related to Dylan in some way. Em, her little sister Lizzie, Ly, Scor, and Sam were waiting for us.

"I'm Amy," the woman said. "You must be Will."

"Yeah," I said, shaking her hand.

"Draco and Blaise couldn't exactly be counted on to make it successfully out of the house today, so I'll be your chaperone," Amy said. "I'm Dylan's cousin, to those of you who don't know me."

"Right," Sam said. I rolled my eyes at him. Next thing we know, he's going to ask why Mr Malfoy and Em's dad can't come to the station.

"So, shall we?" Amy asked. Everyone mumbled something and followed her off the platform towards the car. All of us piled in the back seat, including Amy.

"So, how was your year?" Amy asked.

"Fine," Em mumbled. I smiled at her. I like Em. She's nice. I just wish she wasn't a Slytherin.

"Okay, I guess," Dylan said. Scor and Ly didn't say anything. I know Ly was thinking about everything that had happened with Fred and James and Scor was probably lamenting the vast number of girls he hadn't slept with.

"It was good enough," I said. It was good for me anyways. I got a girlfriend, I'm now an Animagus, I'm a Quidditch superstar. Damn. This year was actually great for me.

"Your year was fucking perfect," Ly said, crossing her arms and staring out the window. I scratched the back of my head awkwardly and looked away.

"Well, we're here," Amy said, glancing nervously between me and Ly.

"Great," Ly said, getting out of the car and storming towards the lift. Scor rolled his eyes like the world was on his shoulders and got up as well, following her.

"I should probably go make sure my dad's alright," Em said.

"I should too," Lizzie said. The both of them got out of the car, leaving me, Sam, Dylan and Amy behind.

"I feel…distinctly out of place," I said.

"It'll be okay," Amy said. "Blaise and Draco seem to be doing better. Better than they were."

"Your doing, I'm guessing?" Dylan said.

"Yeah," Amy said. "You see, we sort of live here now."

"I know," Dylan said. I didn't know that.

"Why?" Sam asked. I closed my eyes, begging for patience and got out of the car.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The two weeks between the end of school and the Weasleys showing up were probably the two longest weeks I have ever experienced in my entire life. And when they did show up, it was sort of weird. Because we were missing people.

Roxie, Al, Lucy, and Dom walked in the door. Fred, James and Rose were nowhere to be seen. Ly looked like she was about to cry until Dom and Roxie hugged her. I don't know if she was missing James or was just depressed that they hadn't shown up and she was pretty sure it was her fault.

"No Rose?" Scor asked, leaning casually against the wall. Dylan and I exchanged looks of panic. Scor was trying to sound casual, it was clear, but there was a dangerous edge in his voice that made me worry.

"No," Lucy said. "She couldn't stand the idea of being in the same house as you."

"Well, at least she's honest," Scor said. "What reason did James and Fred give?"

"Fuck you," Ly said, storming past her brother and up the stairs. Well, she's not better yet.

"I've got it," Em and Dom said in unison, running up the stairs after her.

"Well, I think there's a bottle of Firewhiskey in the attic with our names on it," Dylan said, gesturing to Sam, Lucy, Al and himself.

"What?" Roxie asked. "None for us?"

"No, I think the two of you have some catching up to do," Dylan said, winking at me and running up the stairs, followed by the others. Roxie beamed and threw her arms around my neck. I smiled and snogged her.

"How was your family?" I asked as we walked up the stairs together slowly.

"Great," she said sarcastically. "They were just fucking wonderful." I smiled and hugged her, just glad she was here and I could touch her again.

"How's your sister?" I asked.

"Katie? The very small, very screamy child? Brilliant," she said, opening a door behind her back. I glanced around in confusion and followed her inside the room. It was one of the multitudes of empty guest rooms at the Malfoy Flat.

"How's your brother? Besides hating me and every fibre of my being?" I asked.

"He doesn't hate you quite as much as he hates himself," she said, laughing a little and kissing me again. She deepened the kiss and wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me to her. I smiled against her perfect lips and let her drag me backwards towards the bed.

"Of course," she said, breaking our kiss and falling backwards onto the bed. She looked up at me playfully. "That might change quite quickly."

"How quickly?" I asked, sitting down next to her cautiously. What could she possibly be referring to? I'm bad at girls. Even at my girlfriend. That can't be a good sign. The fact that, as far as Transfiguration goes, I'm a fucking genius, but stick me in the room with my drop dead gorgeous girlfriend and I'm a blathering idiot…

"It depends on how quickly you can undo my bra," she said. I jumped and turned to look at her, realising I'd been spacing out. Leave it to me to space out at a moment like this.

She was still lying on the bed, staring at me, but her shirt was nowhere to be seen. My jaw dropped and I gulped.

"Are you okay?" she asked, raising her eyebrow at me.

"Oh, you have no idea," I said, kissing her again. She smiled against my mouth and shivered slightly when I put my hands on her stomach. Her skin was unbelievably soft.

"I have this nagging feeling that we don't want anyone interrupting us," she said. "For at least a few hours…" I nodded blindly and grabbed my wand, pointing it at the door. It promptly turned into a wall. She raised her eyebrow at me.

"Overkill, but it works," she said, kissing me again. Cautious against getting slapped, I very, very slowly slid my hands up her stomach towards her chest. She squeaked slightly when my hands hit her bra.

"Sorry," I said, pulling back quickly.

"For what?" she asked, looking confused. I glanced down at my traitorous hands, which were still fiddling with the edges of her bra. I tried to make them stop, but realised I couldn't.

"My hands," I said. She laughed, a bright, tinkling laugh.

"Will, the only thing your hands are doing that they shouldn't be is the fact that they're staying there," she said.

"Right, I'll just move them then," I said, reluctantly taking my hands off her. She looked confused.

"Wrong direction," she said. I must have looked confused because she huffed in irritation and pulled my shirt over my head. "You're being too gentlemanly."

"I am?" I asked, more than a little distracted by her hands, which were running all over my chest.

"Yeah," she said, kissing me again before grabbing my hands and directing them to the clasp of her bra. I turned bright red. Hopefully, her eyes are closed too, and she can't see me.

"It's not that challenging, is it?" she asked when I'd had my hands on her back for probably five minutes. It felt like an eon.

"What isn't?" I asked.

"Undoing a bra," she said. She looked at me in uncertainty. "You don't want to, do you?" she asked finally, sitting back away from me. What is going on? I thought we were just snogging. But now I'm apparently in trouble for not taking off her bra.

"Want to what?" I asked. I feel like Sam. He would be equally oblivious right now.

She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest like she was feeling awkward. I don't understand why though. She's got an amazing figure. "What do you think?" she asked, sounding irritated.

"I'm just trying not to go too fast," I said. It is true, I suppose. I am trying not to spook her by really letting loose what I want to do with her.

To my utter shock, she laughed. "Here you are, trying to be a gentleman, and here I am trying to tell you without exactly saying it that I want to shag you," she said, shaking her head in confusion.

"Shag?" I asked, sounding stupid to my own ears. Probably a little like when I asked her out and she kept repeating everything I said.

"Yes, Will," she said, turning to face me again and raising her eyebrow in a challenge. "Shag. Here. Now."

To my chagrin, my face probably lit up like Christmas. "Okay," I said, kissing her again. She smiled into the kiss and slid her hands down to the buckle of my belt.

I finally got her bra clasp undone and she flung it across the room. I have to say, for the first pair of breasts I've ever seen, they're really not bad. At all. Especially since I get to touch them. She gasped slightly when I did. I hope my hands aren't cold…

OOooOOooOOooOO

I like life.

I really, really like life.

Life is the best thing that ever happened to the universe.

And I'm not even drunk or on drugs.

I'm close to becoming that way, but right now, I'm not. I'm just sitting in the attic with the guys. Who are laughing at me.

"What?" I demanded as Dylan handed me the bottle of Firewhiskey.

"You've looked completely blissed out for the past…ten days?" Sam said. "What did you do? Why did you disappear for two hours when Roxie first got here?"

"Why do you think?" Dylan asked him, taking the bottle away from me and handing it to Scor, who seemed to be laughing to himself, more than at me.

"Because they hadn't seen each other in two weeks," Al said, looking like he was about to fall over from alcohol consumption.

"And why did they disappear, then, Sammy?" Dylan asked. Sam's going to get it eventually. And then I'll probably be embarrassed. But I think I finally hit drunk. So maybe I won't.

"Because…" Sam said, looking honestly contemplative.

"Because they were having sex," Scor said, taking the bottle away from Al and downing a good portion of it. "Welcome to the club, mate." He clapped me on the shoulder. Sometimes, it seems like the only time Scorpius is anywhere near his normal old self is when he's drinking, which is funny, since his old self almost never drank.

"Thanks," I said, grinning stupidly. Sam looked shocked.

"You…" he said, pointing accusingly at me.

"Me," I said, grinning still. And not just once either. No. More like, at least once a day since then. Can I just say that sex is fantastic?

"And you didn't tell me?" Sam demanded, looking wounded. "But you told them?"

"We guessed," Dylan said. "We just guessed correctly."

"The room is spinning," Al commented, looking like he was trying to focus on something he couldn't quite see properly.

"Fall down," Dylan said.

"Okay," Al said, falling over backwards and starting to snore. He's probably the most of a light weight of all of us.

"You could tell because Roxie's been glowing since last Saturday," Scor said.

"She has?" I asked. I made a girl glow? That's fantastic. That's really fantastic. I like that.

"Yeah," Dylan said. "Hey, Will?"

"What?" I asked, sounding ridiculously drunk to my own ears now.

"Pass out," he said.

"Okay!" I said, and everything went black.

**Review! **

**See? I don't only write depressing things...**

**And title - Chocolate by Snow Patrol. **


	19. 19: Em

**A/N: So...erm, yeah. New narrator. Whoa, man. Right? Weird. I don't care though. Because she's one of my favourites. I'm sorry for babbling nonsensically at you. I haven't had my coffee yet and both my dogs came into my room at 4:45 and were like, "let's go play" and I managed to ignore them until the cat jumped up on my desk and yowled at me. Then I kicked them all you. You all really didn't need to know that though. Sorry. **

**Chapter 19: Em**

You know what sucks? Besides the obvious answer of "my life"?

You're right! The things going on in my life. Not only do all of my friends happen to be in Gryffindor while I'm stuck in Slytherin, my parents got divorced and I haven't heard from my mum in over six months. My dad's a basket case, my little sister is falling apart and I'm in love with a guy who happens to be dating a girl I actually enjoy being friends with. Does it get worse? Really?

No, probably not.

"Earth to Em," said a voice from next to me. I jumped and turned to face Lucy. "You okay? You look a little spacy."

"Says the airhead," I said, pushing her in the shoulder. She laughed.

"I can't help it, I'm related to my mother," she said. I laughed.

"Fair enough," I said.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked.

"My life," I answered honestly. "And why it sucks."

"Why does your life suck?" she asked. "Caramel corn?" She offered me the bag of self-popping caramel corn she'd managed to charm. It pops in your mouth. It's amazing.

I took a handful of the stuff and dropped a kernel in my mouth.

"Because of my family and because of boys, and because of boys and my family combined," I said.

"Is this about your mum?" she asked.

"Not really," I said. "Good riddance. But it's about the fact that some boy completely destroyed my favourite cousin's spirit and the fact that I might mess up my own friendships with people because of the boy I like and it's just not okay."

"Who do you like?" Lucy asked. I like Lucy. She's one of my best friends. That doesn't mean I should necessarily tell her that I like Will. Especially not since he's dating, and, last I heard, sleeping with, one of her cousins.

"It doesn't matter," I said. I popped another piece of popcorn.

"Sure it does," Lucy said.

"Maybe if he wasn't in this house, I would tell you," I said.

"So you either like one of my cousins or my good friends then," Lucy said. There's that spark of Weasley intelligence that seems to lurk behind all female Weasley's eyes.

"Maybe," I admitted. Maybe both. Although, dating your cousin's leftovers isn't exactly dignified.

"It's Will, isn't it?" Lucy asked. I turned and stared at her in shock. How does she know that? I don't talk in my sleep do I?

"Do I talk in my sleep?" I asked, suddenly panicked. If my roommate at school gets wind of anything I do or know or the people I hang out with, I might die. Actually die. Like, she will kill me.

"No," Lucy said. "Don't worry. He just seems like he's your type."

"Oh," I said. "Right." Because I have a type these days? I didn't know that.

"Are you excited to go back to school?" Lucy asked. Thank you for not pointing out that he's dating someone. Someone nice. Because I like Roxie. I really do. And I would never do anything to hurt either of them.

"Excited?" I asked. "Hell no."

"Why not?" she asked. "Parties are fun."

"Yeah, but we can do everything we do at parties here," I said. "And I don't have to deal with Slytherin problems."

"Oh," Lucy said. "Right. I'm sorry about all that."

I took another handful of popcorn from her. "Me too."

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Get up, you lazy bitch."

She probably meant it as a Slytherin-esque term of endearment, but still.

I hate life.

I lifted my head off my pillow and glanced at my roommate who was standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips looking terrifyingly like my mother. My cat, Trafalgar, licked my nose in protest of my moving.

"Why?" I asked Raven, who rolled her eyes.

"Because we've got to go to class," she said. "And in this day and age, boys don't marry girls just because they're hot. If they don't have some sort of intelligence they're not going to be kept." Right. The ever-dual-purpose education. "Get an education so you can marry a rich guy and never have to use that education a day in your life." I think that was my mother's theory.

I don't belong here. Ly and Scor got lucky. I think because they were in the middle of the alphabet, the Hat let them choose. Because I was the very last person, I don't think it cared any more. I think it saw my last name and my family and stuck me in Slytherin. I wonder how many people have been mis-sorted because of that. There has to be some way to fix that.

"Of course, Raven," I said, getting out of bed and pulling on my uniform. Trafalgar was staring at me like I had done her personal wrong. I scratched her ears and grabbed my bag. Mutely, I followed Raven out of the dormitory.

"So, where were you this summer?" she asked.

"Home," I said. Oddly, this is now true, since my home actually is Uncle Draco's flat in downtown London. Dad even lives there year round now. I suppose it will be a year at Christmas.

"That's boring," she said.

"No, not really," I replied. "My friends all came to stay, so that was nice."

Raven raised her eyebrow at me in disbelief. "Friends?"

As far as Slytherins are concerned, there are no friends outside of our fine and noble house. And she would know if any Slytherin had been at my house. And there weren't any there except for my sister and me.

"What friends?" Raven's boyfriend asked, walking into the common room after us and then following us up to breakfast. I think I'm the only girl in Slytherin besides Lizzie who eats.

"My cousins and their friends," I said before I could stop myself.

"Your cousins the Malfoys?" Raven asked.

"Yeah," I said, trying not to look like I knew I'd just signed my own death warrant.

"Their friends are the Weasleys," Raven's boyfriend said.

"Really? You don't say," I said quietly.

"You hang out with the Weasleys? They're Gryffindors," Raven said. She said Gryffindor like it was a dirty word.

"So what?" I asked. I'm tired of this. I'm completely exhausted by all this. It needs to stop. We fought a war so that people wouldn't be discriminated against based on their blood status, now we need to have another here to remind Slytherin House that house lines only begin to matter for seven years, if at all.

"You hung out with Gryffindors all summer?" Raven's boyfriend said.

I shouldn't. I will get myself in a lot of trouble if I do.

But I guess that might be the reason I got sorted into this god forsaken house.

"I even like a Gryffindor boy or two," I said, raising my eyebrow at him in a challenge. Both of them stopped walking. Their jaws were glued to the floor.

"What?" Raven asked, like I'd just destroyed her faith in humanity. I smiled evilly at them and turned on my heel, marching into the Great Hall and sitting down at the Gryffindor table between Will and Lucy. They both stared at me in shock.

"Hi, guys, how's it going?" I asked. Lucy beamed at me.

"You're here!" she said, hugging me. I smiled.

Yeah. I am here. With my friends, rather than at a table with a group of people who I hate.

"Yes, I am," I said. Ly smiled at me from across the table.

"Em!" Roxie exclaimed, jumping off the bench from the other side of Will and hugging me. I won't make this awkward.

I really wish I didn't like her boyfriend.

"Hi," I said, managing to smile anyways.

"Morning," Dom said, sitting down next to Ly with Sam in tow. I smiled at all of them until I caught sight of the Slytherin table across the hall. A large group of them were muttering together and staring in my direction.

I guess that one of the repercussions of taking a stand is that there will be those who try to stop you.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Maybe they'd forgiven it as a temporary bout of insanity, but by the second week of school, even with my sitting at the Gryffindor table at meals, the Slytherins hadn't seen fit to take revenge upon me.

"No, you don't understand," Sam said. "You have to think about being magnetic." He nodded enthusiastically.

"That doesn't make sense," Lucy said, hitting her head on her Charms notebook.

"Why not?" Sam asked, looking as confused as Lucy.

"Because, Sammy, you're strange," Dylan said, clapping him on the shoulder.

"See, normal people don't understand things the way you do," Al added. "Where's Will? We need a good Sam-to-English dictionary." I laughed.

"Well, they're just Summoning Charms. What else would you need to be besides magnetic?" I said.

"Exactly! Thank you!" Sam said, hugging me. I exchanged a confused look with everyone else. Lucy shrugged.

"You're welcome?" I said. Sam smiled at me.

"I like you," he said. I think there's something wrong with him. "I mean, not like a girlfriend, or anything, but you understand me."

"Right," I said, slightly amused. I think there might actually be something wrong with his brain. "Well, I've got to go to Divination, the best class in the universe, so I'll see you all at dinner," I said, turning away from my friends and heading towards the north tower. They were barely out of sight when I felt something hit me in the back of the head and everything went black.

I came to in an abandoned classroom. My wand was lying on a desk next to me. I went to grab it only to discover my hands were tied to the chair I was sitting in. This is not okay.

"Not so brave now that you're not pretending to be a Gryffindor, are you?" someone asked. A person, another girl from the sound of her voice, walked into my frame of view. She was wearing a ski mask.

"Who are you?" I demanded, trying to sound brave. I'm not particularly, which may be yet another reason why I wasn't sorted into Gryffindor.

She laughed. "I'm one of the people you turned traitor against," she said. So, she's a Slytherin.

"It's just school," I said. I hope I can reason with this person. "It lasts for seven years and then it's over and all the petty differences we have don't matter anymore, like house loyalties, who slept with who's boyfriend and whatever else is going on. It doesn't matter outside of these walls."

"What matters is that you're a traitor Emerald Zabini," she said. "You are a traitor against the house of Slytherin. Do you know what we do with traitors?"

This can't bode well.

She grabbed her wand out of nowhere and pointed it at me. What is she going to do?

My left arm came undone from the bonds holding it to the chair and extended itself obligingly towards her. The only thing Slytherin related that's ever been done to anyone's left arm was the Dark Mark, which I've seen in person all of once. And try as he might, my Uncle Draco still can't make it go away.

She pointed her wand at my arm and burning pain shot up it from the forearm. I hope to hell she's not putting a Dark Mark there. That would be the most evil thing anyone could do right now to someone. We're still not completely recovered from the war. I know my family isn't.

"What are you doing to me?" I demanded. She rolled her eyes – all I could see of her – and pointed her wand at my face.

"_Stupefy_," she said.

This time when I woke up, I was still in the classroom, but I wasn't tied to the chair and I was alone. Immediately, I rolled up my sleeve and looked at my arm. It wasn't a Dark Mark. It was a green and silver snake with the word "Slytherin" written into it. It was coiling and uncoiling on my arm and hissing every so often.

Who does that to someone just because they're an outcast in their own house? I don't fit in with them. I haven't in three full years and now the beginning of a fourth. What makes them think this will make me back down and spend all of my time and loyalty in Slytherin?

That's bull shit.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Professor? Professor McGonagall?" I asked, jogging to catch up with the headmistress.

"Yes, Miss Zabini?" she asked. It's quite strange to think that she taught my dad and mother and went to school with my grandmother.

"What would it take to change the seating arrangements in the Great Hall?" I asked. She looked confused as hell.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I mean, for normal meals, not banquets or anything, would it be possible to, I don't know, maybe change the requirement of sitting with your house?" I asked. Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes.

"Well, it hasn't been done before," she said.

"Does that mean it can't be done?" I asked. Please don't say that.

"Well, I – I don't know, Miss Zabini," she said finally. "You'd need an awful lot of support for that to happen. It might need to go through the board of directors. What is inspiring this?"

"All of my friends are in Gryffindor," I said.

"Well, why global change for a local issue?" she asked.

"Because…" I rolled up my left sleeve. "Because Slytherin's don't get to interact with the other houses by decree of our own peers. And those of us who try get…marked."

"Do you mean to tell me that another student did this to you?" she asked, staring at my arm.

"Yes," I said. "I don't know who it was, but they did it because I hang out with Gryffindors and I'm a Slytherin. And that's not right."

"No, it isn't," she said.

"What action do I have to take to make this happen?" I asked.

"If you can get the students to sign a petition by, let's say a two thirds majority, I don't see why we can't bypass the board of directors entirely," she said.

"Thanks, Professor," I said, turning and running back down the hall towards the Great Hall and dinner. I landed at the Gryffindor table and immediately grabbed out a roll of parchment from my bag and a quill.

"Ly, can I borrow some of that ink you made?" I asked.

"Why?" she asked, looking concerned. Down the table, I could see James watching us in confusion. Probably because I was asking for the use of his ink.

"Because I need something that's not going to fade," I said.

"Sure," she said, pulling out a jar still looking confused. I smiled at her and unscrewed it. At the top of the page I wrote: "_If you sign here, you show your support for the abolition of assigned seating during normal meals. If you sign, you will show your approval for the idea of being able to eat at whichever table you'd like, regardless of house boundaries. One house in particular has been ostracised by this and that's not okay. We need to end this._" Below, I drew two columns. One for signature, the other for House. Mainly because I'm curious to see which houses will sign on, because I know it won't be my own.

I signed my name in the first column and wrote "Slytherin" next to it. I handed the petition to Ly. She read it in confusion.

"What happened?" she asked after signing it and handing it to Sam. I rolled up my left sleeve.

"Misguided attempts at forced house unity," I said. I glanced over at the Slytherin table. They were all staring at me like I'd betrayed them on a deep and personal level. Ly turned around and flipped them off.

"Can you remove it?" she asked, looking at my tattoo again. I shrugged.

"I don't know," I said. "I haven't tried yet."

"When did this happen?" she asked.

"A few hours ago," I said. Her jaw dropped.

"Sam!" she said. He turned and looked guilty. I'm not sure for what.

"What?" he asked.

"No panicking, Sam," Will said, sitting down across from him. Sam nodded and took a deep breath.

"Could you remove a tattoo?" Ly asked him.

"I dunno," Sam said. "Probably."

"I could Transfigure one," Will said. "Why? Who's got one?"

"I do," I said laying my arm on the table. Both boys' jaws dropped.

"What the fuck?" Will asked, staring from my arm back to me and back to my arm again.

"I believe it was retribution for having friends in Gryffindor," I said. He looked pissed.

"Em, what happened?" Roxie asked, sitting down next to Will.

"Slytherin bastards attacked her for hanging out with us," Will explained. Roxie looked infuriated.

"I will go fuck them all up, if you'd like," she said. I really hate it that I like Roxie sometimes. It would be so much easier if I didn't.

"It's okay," I said. "I chose political retribution instead."

"What?" Will asked.

"I'm making a petition that says you can sit anywhere during normal meals, not necessarily at your house table," I explained.

"That's fantastic," Dom said, sitting down next to Roxie. I shrugged. I thought it was.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"I signed your petition," said a boy's voice from behind me. I turned around. I was in the Slytherin common room, on my way to my dormitory.

"You did?" I asked. I have no idea who this guy is. I've never talked to him before. I'm pretty sure he's in my year though. He nodded.

"We're the only two Slytherins," he said. The petition has been circling for three days now.

"Why did you sign it?" I asked. He seemed to smirk to himself.

"One moment," he said. He walked over to one of the coffee tables in the centre of the common room. He stepped up on it. "Hey! Everyone? Yeah, all you Slytherin bastards who think we're the best house and everyone else can go fuck themselves? You're wrong." My jaw dropped. Everyone in the common room was now staring at the guy.

"What's wrong with you, Kevin?" someone asked. Kevin Griggs. Right. I guess I do know who he is. I haven't talked to him since the first day of school in first year. It's almost October of fourth year.

"You know what? Nothing's wrong with me," Kevin Griggs said. "You're all the ones with the problem," he added, gesturing to the entire common room. There were scoffs of disbelief from almost everyone.

"Kevin, what are you doing?" someone else asked. Kevin looked slightly mischievous like he'd decided something.

"I'm confessing," he said. "Guess what? I've got a girlfriend."

"That's great, why haven't you told any of us before?" said one of the other boys in my year.

"Because she's in Ravenclaw," Kevin said. The crowd broke out in angry jeers. "We've been together for almost three years and we haven't told anyone because all of you are fuckheads."

"Traitor!" someone yelled. Then wands were pulled. This isn't okay.

I beat my way through the crowd and stood up on the table next to Kevin.

"Leave him alone," I said in the most menacing voice I could manage. "He didn't do anything wrong."

"You're one to talk," said someone else. "Your fucking petition is going to upset the order of things. The proper order of things!"

"Proper order?" I demanded. "There's something wrong with this house and I'm trying to fix it."

"We don't need fixing!" someone else yelled.

"Yeah, we do," I said. More wands were getting pulled out. This should be good. "If one of our own members is too scared to tell his house, who is supposed to be his family, that he's in love with someone, that's bull shit. Why don't you see that?"

"Because they're blind," Kevin said quietly. Then he paled. "Duck!"

OOooOOooOOooOO

I woke up in a dark corridor, alone.

"Em? Em, are you okay?" someone was asking. I blinked groggily. Fred Weasley's face swam in and out of focus above me.

"Hey, Fred," I said, sounding as tired as I felt.

"Oh, thank Merlin," he said, hugging me. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"I don't know," I said. "I think I got hexed." He looked horrified.

"We should get you to Madam Pomfrey," he said, helping me to my feet. "Do you remember why you were hexed?"

"Because I was trying to keep the rest of Slytherin house from hexing the boy who'd just admitted to dating a Ravenclaw," I explained. My head felt funny. I stumbled and almost fell over, but Fred caught me.

"What's wrong with Slytherin house?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't understand."

"Well, you'll always have us," he said. I half smiled at him, but it turned into more of a wince than anything else. I thought back to the summer between second and third years when I told Lucy I couldn't decide if I liked Will or Fred better. Right now, I think it might be Fred.

Is liking your cousin's leftovers a bad move? It's probably a better one than liking your friend's boyfriend.

"Thanks," I said quietly.

"I'm serious, Em," he said.

"Thank you," I replied. We walked in silence for a minute. "Fred?"

"Yeah?" he asked.

"What happened with Lyra?" I asked. I want to know his side of the story. I've heard Ly's.

He stared at his feet for a minute. "I fucked up," he said. "I shouldn't have done it. But I'm a hideously jealous person, and the idea that I could be better than James at anything was shocking and fantastic and it was entirely wrong. I messed up both of their happiness, and my own, and then I lost both of my best friends and I keep repeating that night over and over again in my head and everyway I look at it, I'm the bad guy. Lyra wasn't in any fit position to make decisions about anything, and I was and I should've said no, but I didn't."

This is interesting. I know Ly blames herself, and now I've found out that Fred blames himself as well. I bet it was probably joint effort on their parts.

"You regret it, right?" I asked.

"So, so much," he said. "Why?"

"Because I'm testing out the idea of having Gryffindor courage," I said. He looked confused until I kissed him.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Miss Zabini," Professor McGonagall said. "This is impressive."

"Thanks," I said. She was staring at my petition.

"How many of the students is this?" she asked.

"84.7%," I said. The senior Slytherins had signed it as well, in addition to everyone else from the other houses.

"I think that means it passes," McGonagall said. "Congratulations."

"Thanks," I said, smiling at her and walking out of her office. I was met at the bottom of the stairs by Roxie, Will, Lucy, Sam and Fred.

"Well?" Lucy asked. I grinned. "Congratulations!"

"Thanks!" I said. Fred spun me around and kissed me. I smiled. I like having a boyfriend. When he set me back on my feet I had enough time before Lucy, Sam and Roxie hugged me to see Will glare daggers at Fred.

What the hell?

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	20. 20: Sigh No More

**A/N: So, this chapter is a little odd. But that's okay, I think. It exists because one of the characters is remarkably misunderstood by all of his friends, and he finally points this out. Which is fun, I suppose. **

**Timeline: This chapter takes place just before winter break in the majority of the character's fourth year. James and Fred and Frank are fifth years. **

**Chapter 20: Sigh No More (Sam)**

You know what's weird? I was almost starting to understand girls. Well, as well as I will ever understand girls.

That's stopped now. Which is probably for the best, because I think if I understood girls, nothing would ever happen to me that was remotely interesting. Except that maybe I wouldn't panic as much and I might not spill my friend's secrets to the world. That's more of an understanding life thing, though, and I doubt that I will ever accomplish that.

The reason I thought I was staring to understand girls is because the things Ly, and Roxie, and Dom, and Rose, and Lucy, and Em were saying were starting to make sense.

Then Fred and Em started dating and things stopped making sense again.

"Sam!" Will yelled, throwing something at me. I jumped and almost fell over. I think I was drooling again. I swayed on my feet and turned to face Will.

"Yes?" I asked.

"What are you doing?" he asked, looking worried. I thought about it. I actually have no idea.

"I don't know," I said. I looked down at my hands. In one, I was holding my wand and in the other, I was holding a pair of girl's underwear.

I don't understand my life.

"How much did you drink last night?" he asked, looking worried for my sanity. I thought about it.

"We drank last night?" I asked.

"Oh," he said. He clapped me on the shoulder. "Do you know who those belong to?" he asked, gesturing to the underwear. I shook my head.

"I'll go kill Frank," Dylan offered, starting out of the room and down the stairs.

"I'll help," Al said, following him. I blinked and sat down on the edge of my bed.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"We were at a party last night," Scor said. "See, Gryffindor under the captainship of one Dom Weasley, won the Ravenclaw-Gryffindor game by a landslide. Welcome to fourth year, in case you've forgotten that part."

Fourth year…no, that makes sense. Right?

"Who's the other beater again?" I asked, sounding confused to my own ears.

I wonder if you could make a charm that allows you to understand what you're saying at all times…

"Hugo," Will said. I blinked stupidly at him. "Hugo Weasley. Rose's little brother."

"Right," I said. I think he's a second year? That sounds right. Maybe.

God, what did I do last night?

OOooOOooOOooOO

"How's life, gents?" Em asked, sitting down next to us at the breakfast table. Ever since she got her petition signed, she's eaten breakfast with us every day. A few places down the table, a small gaggle of Ravenclaws was eating pancakes. One boy in a Slytherin tie was sitting there as well. He had his arm around one of the Ravenclaw girls. Em smiled at him and he nodded back at her.

"Life's fine," Will said. Roxie rolled her eyes.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say your life is perfect again," she said. Will considered it.

"Yeah," he said finally, nodding.

"You did good things in the Quidditch game didn't you?" I asked for clarification's sake. I don't really remember anything that happened yesterday.

"Yes, yes I did," Will said. I nodded and drank more of my coffee.

"Well done," I said. Em raised her eyebrow at me.

"What did you do yesterday, Sam?" Ly asked, sitting down next to me. I shrugged helplessly. She smiled at me in a confused way. "Anyways, do you think I could have my underwear back?"

Em, the recently arrived Fred, Dom, Roxie, Will and my jaw all dropped towards the table.

I wonder if you could make a charm that would allow you to remove parts of your body without permanent damage to your person…

"Underwear?" I asked. Will clapped me on the shoulder and nodded proudly.

"Good on you, mate," he said.

"Wait, what happened?" Scor asked sitting down.

"I don't know," I said. Ly smiled in a small way at her brother. Fred was staring at her looking disturbed.

"I know," Ly said. "But I'd rather not tell you."

"Why not?" Scor asked, looking pissed.

"Because you do this," she said, nodding at his hand, which was clenching his wand like he wanted to hex someone, probably me. I don't want Scorpius to hex me. That doesn't sound very fun.

I think I like the _protego_ charm a lot right now.

"Fuck off, Malfoy," Rose said, sitting down next to Ly. Why does she say these things to Ly? Ly didn't do anything to her.

"Never. Rosie," Scor said. Oh. Right. Wrong Malfoy.

Everyone except for the two of them exchanged worried looks. They're never in this close proximity to each other. Ever. For good reason, or so Will tells me.

"How was your night?" Scor asked Rose, smiling at her condescendingly.

"Why don't you ask Tommy?" Rose suggested.

"Tommy Townsend?" Ly asked, looking disturbed. Rose thought about it.

"Yeah," she said. "I think that's what he said his name was." Scor glowered at her. "Fuck off, Malfoy."

Scorpius rolled his eyes at her and stood up, stalking down the table and sitting down next to James and Frank.

I watched him leave and felt some of the tension leave with him. "Lyra?" I asked.

"Yes, Sam?" she replied. Everyone else was regarding us curiously.

"What happened last night?" I asked. She laughed and glanced down the table, probably to make sure her brother wasn't listening.

"Let's just say that for someone who is generally clueless about life, you're very, very good at some other things," she said, drinking her coffee.

Dom choked. "You didn't," she said, staring at Ly in an accusing fashion.

"I may have," Ly said, trying to conceal a smug smirk.

"May have what?" I asked. Dom was staring at me like she hated my guts. I don't understand life.

"Mate," Will said, clapping me on the shoulder again. He only does that when he thinks I've done something good. I don't know what I'm supposed to have done. I don't know anything!

"First off, don't panic," Ly said. I nodded, definitely starting to panic. Why won't anyone tell me what happened? They all seem to understand.

"Tell me what's going on!" I demanded, probably looking wild. I heard someone sigh in exasperation behind me. I turned around. Lucy was standing there with her arms crossed, looking somewhere between amused and pitying.

"You got laid, Sam," she said. What is she talking about? That doesn't make sense.

"I did what?" I asked, looking around at everyone for explanation.

"You see, Sam, when a man and a woman love each other very much-" Roxie started to say.

"This is Sam we're talking about. So that's bullshit," Will said, cutting her off. "Sam, when a man and a woman get drunk together and take their clothes off, things tend to happen. Fun things, but things none the less."

"Way to be an ass, Will," Roxie said. She stood up and started walking away.

"Roxie," Will said, trying to placate her. She kept walking. "Roxie! Wait up!" He jumped up and followed her out of the hall.

Oh. That's what they're talking about.

Oh my god.

"We had sex?" I demanded, my voice cracking on the last word. I'm only fourteen. That can't be normal. The sex, not the voice cracking. The voice cracking did stop a few years ago though. So why is it back?

"Thanks for that, Sam," Ly said, looking slightly bemused as the entire table turned to stare at me. This included Scor and James, who both looked like they wanted to kill me. If I'm going to die for it, I'd like it better if I could remember the actual act.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Sam, you seem distracted," Professor Macmillan said. I dropped my wand on the desk in the empty Charms classroom and hit my head on the same desk moments later.

"Not really," I said. "Just mostly."

"What happened?" he asked. Great. Now he's flat out asked me. And I'm incapable of lying.

"Apparently, I had sex with one of my good friends and I don't remember it at all. And now I'm just confused, because I only like her as a friend and at the same time, I like someone else as more than a friend but I ended up in bed with someone I didn't like," I said.

I think I hate my life.

"Sam, I think you need to work on your issues with honesty," Professor Macmillan said.

"I don't have issues with honesty," I said. He nodded.

"That's my point," he said. "Some things you've just got to keep to yourself."

"Right," I said slowly. That does make sense, I suppose. Maybe it's better not to tell everyone everything. That's probably for the best. I just wish I had the will power to do that. But, as far as I know, I don't.

I got back to the common room only to discover Dom and Lucy sitting there with their arms around Will, who looked very, very confused. Almost as confused as I normally am.

"What's wrong?" I asked, sitting down with them. Will seemed to consider his words carefully before saying anything.

"I think I just got dumped," he said.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Three weeks later found us all getting ready to go home for Christmas. My family is wholly unremarkable since it's just me, my mum and my dad and neither of them are magical. I can't say I'm looking forward to it.

"Excited for Christmas?" Dom asked me, sitting down in the last compartment of the last car in the train. I sat down next to her. I still can't believe I slept with Ly when I'm sort of in love with Dom. Apparently, I say that I'm in love with Dom a lot when I'm drunk.

"No," I said.

"Can't be feeling as shit about it as Ly and Scor," Roxie said brightly. She seems to be fine with the whole "breaking up with Will" thing. Although, I wouldn't really know, since I'm ignorant in the ways of women.

"Yeah," James said quietly. "Year anniversary of their mum…"

"Oh, right," I said. I haven't even thought of that. Christmas must be terrible for them. Now that their mum's gone and since she died on Christmas or near it and everything. I liked Mrs Malfoy. She was really nice to everyone. It's too bad that she's gone now.

"So, I think I figured out what to call it," Lucy said. I was sitting with all of the Weasleys except for Rose, and Fred, who were both off doing something else. Rose was, at least according to her little brother Hugo, off with some boy and Fred was with Em.

"Call what?" Dom asked.

"The whole break up of Rose and Scor and Ly and James," Lucy said.

"We didn't break up," James said darkly, staring out the window. "We were never really together."

"Bullshit, sir," Al said.

"Fuck off," James said. I don't like being the only non-Weasley. Lucy, Dom, Roxie, James, Al, I mean, I like them all. I like them a lot. But I don't know why I'm the one who's sitting with them. I don't understand it. Especially since James probably wants me dead.

I wonder if I could make a charm that would make it possible to know when someone wants to kill you…

"What do you think you should call it, Lucy?" Roxie asked.

"The Great Schism," she said, smiling. That sounds familiar.

"Wasn't that in the fourteenth century or something when the Catholic Church separated from the Eastern Orthodoxy?" I asked. The five of them exchanged highly confused looks.

"What's the Eastern Orthodoxy?" Al asked.

"And that's why you should do Muggle Studies, mate," Dylan said from the doorway.

"Okay, hi, but what is it?" Al asked.

"Religion, Albus," Dylan said. "It's a certain part of religion."

"Oh," Al said, looking like he felt stupid.

"Come on, man. Sam knows that," Dylan said, sitting down in Lucy's lap. She raised her eyebrow at the back of his head but didn't tell him to move.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dom asked. She sounded…offended?

I wish there was a charm that would let me know what emotion best goes with whatever people say…

"Just that Sam's sort of clueless most of the time," Dylan said. He looked over at me. "You are, aren't you?"

"Now you remember I'm here," I said quietly.

"What?" Dylan asked, looking desperately confused.

"I have perfect hearing," I said. "And a very good memory."

"Except when it comes to what you did with Lyra after the Ravenclaw-Gryffindor Quidditch game," Dom said quietly.

"That's not fair. I was drugged, you know that," I said.

"Sam, are you okay?" Lucy asked from around Dylan's back.

"No," I said. I knew it was the truth the moment I said it, because, well, I'd said it. "I'm not okay. I haven't been okay for years. Everyone treats me like I'm some sort of idiot. Or – or some sort of idiot savant. But I'm not. Trust me, I'm not. My parents had all of the tests done when I was a kid. And you all talk about me like I'm not here. 'Sam says this' or 'Sam's like this' or…Why don't you ever just ask me? It's not like I'd lie to you. All of you. All of you do it. 'Sam's sort of clueless.' 'We need a Sam-to-English dictionary.' It's not my fault that I'm really fucking fantastic at Charms. It's not my fault I don't know what's going on most of the time. Maybe I just need you guys to fill me in occasionally. But I'm only fourteen. I'm a fourteen year old _guy_. The fact that I understand _anything _is a shock. But I understand enough that you guys, you're only friends with me because I'm your dorm mate. See ya after Christmas."

I stood up and grabbed my trunk and stormed out into the corridor. There was nothing except shocked silence behind me.

"Sam! Hey, Sam!" said a girl's voice from behind me. I turned around. Ly was running up the corridor towards me.

"Hey, Ly," I said. I think the only reason I'm not awkward around her is because I don't remember doing anything.

"Are you okay?" she asked me.

"I'm better now," I said.

"I heard you yelling," she said.

"Great," I said.

"Most of the train did, actually," she said. "At least, this carriage." I cringed.

"Sorry about that," I said.

"No, don't be," she said. "You're right."

"I know," I said. She laughed.

"Never were one for modesty, were you?" she asked.

"Modesty is lying," I said simply. It's true. At least, it's true in my head.

"You probably don't notice, but everyone does something like that to me as well," she said. I stared at her in confusion. "Yes, 'Lyra might not remember tomorrow, since she's sick.' I've heard that one more often than I've heard, 'Hey, Lyra, do you remember that time when…' They just assume that I don't know."

"I never noticed," I said. She smiled at me.

"You know you're not just good at Charms, Sam," she said. I thought about it.

"What else am I good at?" I asked. I don't really think I'm good at anything else. I've never really done anything else.

"Let's just say you're going to make Dom very happy one day," she said. "Very, _very_ happy." I raised my eyebrow at her.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. She looked amused.

"I'll help you out with this one," she said. "First clue – I'm the only one who'd know." I stared at her blankly. "And you don't actually remember."

"Are you saying that I'm-"

"Talented? Very, very talented? Yes, yes I am," she said. "Really good…"

I turned pink. "Erm…thanks?"

"Definitely a compliment," she said. I kicked my trunk in the awkward silence that followed. "You know I'm talking about sex, right?"

"Yeah," I said. I had actually reached that conclusion on my own.

"Just making sure," she said. "Well, erm, happy Christmas, Sam." She turned and started walking back down the corridor.

"Happy Christmas, Ly," I muttered.

"Women," Will said, leaning against the wall across from me. I nodded. Maybe I do almost understand.

**Review!**

**Reason for the title: It is a Mumford & Sons song which has the lyrics "love will not betray you, dismay or enslave you. It will set you free." **


	21. 21: Hopeless

**A/N: And now I get to explain my whole "why I made it so they were drinking/having sex at such an early age" thing. First off, I do not personally partake in the activity of getting drunk. I also do not do drugs. I do not condone these behaviours in anyone really. However, I can count on one hand the number of teenagers I know who haven't been drunk. And where I'm from, at least, the drinking and the partying starts as early as the eighth grade (equivalent of third year). The sex thing was slightly more logical. All of them were at minimum fourteen before they lost their virginities, even if they were in third year. A lot of the people I'm friends with were fourteen when they had sex the first time. So, it seemed real. I'm trying not to make anything the idealised version of high school or being a teenager. I'm trying to make it the real version. **

**I figured I finally needed to say it. **

**Anyways, this is the last chapter I have already written. So updates will be in real time now. You should all know that, since updates will be a lot slower now. I will also be editing my novel in this time period, since it's finally summer vacation. I will, however, do my best to work on this story. **

**Thanks for reading and reviewing! (hint hint)**

**Chapter 21: Hopeless (Fred)**

I think I'm Satan. It's the most logical conclusion I can come to. Who else sleeps with their best friend's girl? And then dates her cousin? And then sleeps with her cousin?

No one. Thus why I am Satan. There is no other possible explanation for my actions of last year. And of this year. I'm a bastard. And I don't like it. Except I don't know what to do about it either.

"Weasley, for the love of fuck, pay attention!"

I grabbed the Quaffle as it zoomed by my ear and lobbed it in Will's direction. If he hadn't been as good as he was, it would've pegged him in the brain and possibly knocked him off his broom and killed him. I would so have been okay with that.

"He didn't do anything to you," James said sourly from nearby. He's started talking to me again. It's only been a year or so. I think it's because he's got a girlfriend. She's in our year and a Ravenclaw and I think her name is Daphne. But he's got one. And now that he does, he's actually said a few words to me. Without the key verb, adjective, adverb and possibly noun, being "fuck."

"Right, sorry," I said as the three of us converged in the middle of the Quidditch pitch. Dom has the three of us out here trying to work through our "interpersonal issues." I swear to Jesus she's channeling Wood. "He just fucked my baby sister."

"Fuck you, Weasley," Will said. I'm not sure how well he's taking Roxie breaking up with him. I don't think it's going over nicely. Especially since he keeps staring at my girlfriend. And I don't like that.

"Anyways!" James said, flying in between us. "Will, I like Fred about as much as you do, but it isn't his fault Roxie broke up with you."

"Thanks," I said quietly.

"No, it was my own damn fault because I'm an idiot," Will said, sagging on his broom.

"Not going to argue with you there," I said. James rounded on me and glared.

"Would you stop?" he asked. "You're only making it worse."

Right. Because I don't make anything better anymore. Ever.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"What's wrong?" Frank asked at breakfast the next day. I love Saturdays.

"Life," I said, hitting my head on the table. "Life is wrong, Frank."

"Hey, at least your dad doesn't teach here," Frank said. I lifted my head off the table and stared at him, raising my eyebrow.

"Frank," I said slowly. "You cultivate strange, strange drugs in your dad's greenhouse. And you don't get in trouble. Therefore, it's better for you that your dad teaches here." He considered it and then shrugged.

"Maybe you're right," he said.

"I know I am," I said. "I only fuck up on purpose, remember? Never on accident."

"So…I know I'm not supposed to talk about it, but what exactly happened between you and James?" Frank asked. "I know it's been, like, a year and you still haven't started talking again."

My side of that terrible, terrible decision.

When I found out why Ly was being so weird that night, I may have honestly considered throwing myself off the Astronomy Tower. But then because I thought I might have gotten something better than James did, I stopped. Arrogance saved my life, essentially. Really a proud moment in the life of one Fred Weasley.

"We got in a fight," I said.

"I know," Frank said. "About what?"

"A girl," I said shortly. I still don't like talking about it. I deserve to feel like a prime choice, grade A asshole for everything that happened, but it doesn't mean I have to like feeling it.

Speaking of grade A assholes, the door to the Great Hall opened and Scorpius walked in, sauntered over to the Hufflepuff table and promptly snogged one of the girls. Oh, Em would kill me for saying "Hufflepuff" table. It's really just the second table in on the right. I can remember that.

"Which girl?" Frank asked. "Lyra?" I looked away from Scorpius and back at Frank.

"Yeah," I said. "Lyra."

"What happened?" he asked. Well, I suppose he deserves to know, since he's now the closest thing I've got to a best friend.

"I liked Lyra," I said. "Probably loved her. Except she was in love with James. And then she needed someone to talk to after her mum died, and I didn't know her mum had just died, and then she pulled my clothes off and we shagged and then James walked in and then I lost both my best friends, long story short."

Frank's jaw was almost literally hitting the table.

"Yeah," I said. He shook his head and pointed behind me. I turned around slowly, expecting the worst and not being surprised to find it.

Em looked shocked. At least, I assume it was shock since her jaw looked like Frank's and her eyebrows were in her hairline.

"You did what?" she asked in a dangerous tone of voice. I bit my lip.

"You knew what happened," I said. She did know, right? That's why she asked me if I regretted it.

"Well, apparently, I only got the abridged version," she said, still sounding terrifying.

"How abridged?" I asked. She lowered her eyebrows and raised one of them.

"Lyra didn't tell me there had been sex with the two of you," Em said. Oh fuck. I'm so dead. So very, very dead.

"Em," I said, reaching out a hand to put it on her shoulder. She shrugged me off and took a step back.

"No," she said. "No, you lied to me."

"No!" I said. "I thought you knew." She shook her head at me like she couldn't believe me. Then she turned and walked away. The logical thing to do would have been to follow her. But for god knows what reason, I didn't.

"That hurts," Frank said. I scooped up a spoonful of oatmeal and flung it at him. It hit him precisely in the left eye. There was silence in the seats around us. Then someone from what was formerly known as the Slytherin table yelled, "Food fight!" and chaos ensued. I managed to beat my way out of the Great Hall covered only in three pancakes and part of someone's coffee. The first person I ran into in the Entrance Hall was in slightly worse shape than myself. He was picking a bowl of blueberries out of his hair.

"You know if you had a spoon or something that would be easier," I said.

"I'm considering just Transfiguring them all into razor blades and making this all go away," he said. I nodded. I don't really hate him, I suppose. I don't like that he dated my sister. That really bothers me. But I don't hate him. Besides, I need him for Quidditch purposes.

"I understand," I said. He raised his eyebrow.

"Do you?" he asked. I nodded. "Tower? Firewhiskey?"

"Definitely," I said.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The party didn't really get going until about eleven pm. By that point, Will and I were so completely shitfaced that we couldn't have told you which position we played on the Quidditch pitch, much less which team we played for.

"Oh, dear Jesus," said an irate girl's voice from behind us around midnight. We turned around, slurring our movements in the process and running into each other. Dom was standing there, looking terrifying.

"You made a Veela angry," said a random sixth year from next to us. Dom stopped looking mad at us in that instant and decked the guy.

"Don't call me that," she said. He looked scared out of his mind and ran away. "You two, get to bed and try to sleep this off. We've got practice tomorrow."

"Sure, captain my captain my captain," Will said, falling over onto me. I held him up by the back of his shirt. I laughed in a highly undignified manner and tried to not fall over. I don't think I did a very good job of it since I collided with something and ended up on the floor seconds later. Will landed next to me.

"Hey, I could use a hand," Dom called off into the distance.

"But Nique!" someone said. I raised my eyebrow at whoever was speaking. My vision was blurring at that point so I couldn't tell you if the person was a girl or a boy or something in between.

All I knew is that I would be regretting this tomorrow.

"Get your sorry arse over here Hugo and grab a leg," Dom said. I heard my little cousin groan angrily and felt something grab my ankle.

"Don't that tickles stop it," I said. I laughed and then kicked whoever it was. I heard Hugo grunt in pain and then drop my foot.

"Someone else can deal with him," he said.

"Hugo, you are a second year, and therefore you are the bitch of the entire Gryffindor Quidditch team," Dom said.

"Is it scary that she sounds just like Wood sometimes without actually being him or am I just drunk?" I slurred at Will. He thought about it.

Before he could answer, someone picked me up and threw me over their shoulder before dragging me out of the Tower and towards the Gryffindor dormitories. I felt myself land on a bed that might not have actually been mine and then someone dropped in the bed next to the one I was in. I glanced over. Sam and James were leaving the room, leaving me and Will alone again. I don't know why they thought that was a good idea. One of us might become sober and kill the other.

"I had sex with your sister and then she dumped me," Will said. I nodded. I knew that much.

"I had sex with Em but then Em found out I had sex with Lyra and she may have dumped me as well," I said. Fuck. I don't like that. I don't like saying it out loud.

"I'm sorry," Will said.

There was a pause for so long that I thought he might have fallen asleep.

Then he said it - "Does that mean she's single?"

OOooOOooOOooOO

"So, I got asked an interesting question a few days ago," I said, sitting down next to Em at breakfast. The hangover had finally abated. She ignored me. I tried not to focus on the fact that she's gorgeous.

"Someone asked me if you were single," I continued. She took a drink of her coffee. She'd put the right amount of cream in it that it happened to be the exact same colour as her skin.

"Did they?" she asked icily. "Who would that have been?"

"Will," I said. She raised her eyebrow. To my utter chagrin it wasn't in a, "Well-wasn't-that-a-stupid-question-for-him-to-ask-where-does-he-get-off?" type way. It was more of a, "Really?-And-where-do-I-find-his-number?" type expression.

"And what did you tell him exactly?" Em asked. I bit my lip.

"I didn't tell him anything," I said.

"Why not?" she asked. I think this is it. I think this means we're done. Doesn't it?

I don't understand women.

"Because he passed out," I said. She raised her eyebrow again, but this time it was more of a challenging, "you-didn't-do-anything-stupid-did-you?" type thing.

"He was really drunk," I said. "So was I."

"Thus why you were even talking to each other, I suppose," she said. She stood up and started walking away.

"Wait, Em," I said, standing up and catching her elbow.

"When you next see Will, you can tell him the truth," she said, wrenching her elbow out of my hand.

"I don't know what the truth is," I said. She rolled her eyes.

"You're single, Fred," she said, and then she walked away.

OOooOOooOOooOO

It was almost June before anything started to be normal again. And it wasn't normal even then because I had OWLs. And OWLs suck. Badly. And the Quidditch final. Of course, we won that hands down. Somehow, despite all our interpersonal shit, Will, James and I actually make a crack team.

But things started to be normal for the first time since January of fourth year when James staggered randomly into the dormitory and fell sideways onto his bed, looking confused by life.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Got laid," he said, seeming highly confused about everything he was saying. I stared at him with concern in my eyes. It'd been three months since Em dumped me. Not that I blame her. I am evil, after all.

"Why are you like this then?" I asked, a little wary about the fact that he was talking to me. "Shouldn't you be bouncing off the walls, or something?" I asked.

He stared at me in utter disdain. "How did you feel after you lost your virginity?" he asked.

Well, I felt like shit since it meant I'd lost the girl I thought I was in love with and my best friend with one bad call. Right. I suppose that's sort of his point.

"Right," I said, lying back on my bed. "Want to…talk about it?"

He rolled over and stared at me.

"She dumped me," he said. For one brief and insane second, I thought for sure he was talking about Lyra.

"Daphne Dixon dumped you?" I asked. He nodded. "You're really that bad in bed?"

Like I'd hoped against hope, he actually laughed. And then I laughed. And then we both broke into hysterical laughter that had absolutely no base in anything sane.

That night as I was falling asleep, the strangest feeling started to form in my chest, somewhere between my solar plexus and my sternum. It took me a while to identify, but then I realised – it was hope.

**Review!**


	22. 22: Boys of Summer

**A/N: I figured it out. There will be approximately forty and change. Chapters. It gave me a little bit of hope because I wrote my novel in a similar narration sequence and it took me until chapter 50 something to have it all planned out to the tune of the fact that there was going to be 78 chapters. So, yeah. 40 is nothing. Anyways, here is the next chapter. Unfortunately, the next chapter isn't Rose/Scorpius. It's my third favourite couple. But, you don't know who that is yet, so...**

**Disclaimer: I am not JK Rowling. Someday, I may be famous, but I will still remain _not_ JKRowling.**

**Chapter 22: Boys of Summer (James)**

Well, life sucks less in the summer after fifth year than it did last summer. Las summer, I just slept on my bedroom floor with my mum and dad looking at me like I was insane. And Lily poking her head in every twenty minutes to make sure I was still breathing. Very considerate, my sister. And half of last summer, I wished that I wasn't breathing.

"Still alive but I'm barely breathing. Just praying to a god that I don't believe in." I think that's how the lyrics go. Strangely, this is my life. Or it was. But it's gotten a little better recently. Namely because I found it in myself somewhere to forgive Fred since it wasn't really his fault as far as I can tell. He handled it badly, but it wasn't his fault.

And the worst part is, I'm not sure it's Lyra's fault either. I'm not sure it's anyone's fault. Maybe it's mine.

But somehow, the summer after fifth year, I found myself walking into a shiny gold lift surrounded by all of my friends and found myself stepping into the foyer and being greeted by Minty the house elf and Mr Malfoy and Mr Zabini and Amy Abernathy.

"Who's for a game of Quidditch?" Will asked the minute we stepped inside.

"Hell yeah," I said. Quidditch is good. I like Quidditch. It takes my mind off of my hideous wreck of a love life.

"Then get upstairs," Dom said, glaring at us with her best captain's stare.

"Yes, drill sergeant," Em said, pretending to curtsy. I saw Fred watching her out of the corner of his eye. But, strangely enough, so was Will.

"Will, Fred, please don't kill each other," Roxie said, walking by with Lyra. I'm glad that even though Roxie and Will broke up they didn't have one of those divorce type break ups.

Lyra didn't really look at me as they walked by.

"Us?" Will asked. "Kill each other? Fat chance." Fred smiled evilly.

"Me? Kill him successfully?" he asked. "Maybe."

"Oh, fuck you," Will said.

"Boys," Dom said in a warning tone.

"Yes, mother?" Will asked.

Under Dom's glare, the two of them trooped up the stairs to the Quidditch pitch. Em, Dom and I followed at a distance.

"Why do they hate each other so much?" Em asked as we climbed the stairs.

"Because Will slept with Fred's little sister," I explained. "Just like I'll kill Scorpius if he actually carries through with his whole 'sleeping with Lily' idea."

"Of course, Scorpius also wants to kill Fred for touching his sister," said a highly aloof voice from behind us. The three of us turned to find Scor standing there looking amused. "And if Ioan so much as looks at her wrong, I'll kill him."

"If Ioan does what?" I asked. Dom and Em exchanged looks behind my back and started to walk quicker.

"James, we'll see you up there," Dom said.

"Okay," I said. I turned back to face Scorpius. "If Ioan does what, Scorpius?"

Scor looked genuinely repulsed by what he was about to say, which I had to give him credit for, because he's definitely done some repulsive things and people according to the school rumour mill.

"Third year, a year and a half ago," Scor said. That drops the date directly into the worst time of my life when Lyra and Fred slept together. Cool. "Well, I slept with Fiona Finnegan."

"I know," I said. Because I got to hear Rose scream angrily about it for…oh, wait, no. She's still mad about that.

"And then Ioan slept with Rose, but he said we weren't even," Scor said. I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked. I don't really want to hear the sexcapades of Scorpius Malfoy. It's not on my bucket list.

"Because he said we weren't even and then said, 'a twin for a twin'," Scor said.

"Oh," I said lamely. I couldn't help it. I was busy feeling ill. The thought of Ioan putting his hands anywhere on Lyra…I'd probably end up killing him.

"And I figure that it's going to take the combined efforts of a few people to keep that from happening," he said. "Because he knows she's sick."

Well, fuck. "That's not good," I said.

"That's why I told you," Scor said. "Want to help?" I looked at him curiously.

"Why the fuck are you such a dick most of the time?" I asked. He laughed in a manic sort of way.

"Thanks," he said. "I try."

"Yeah, just don't touch my sister, because I'll beat you up," I said. He laughed for real. I think that's progress. Maybe?

"What about your cousins?" he asked. I raised my eyebrow.

"Which ones?" I asked. He considered.

"Most of them?" he suggested. "Because, I know you don't get to see it, but the Weasley women are rather…" he cut off and traced the outline of a curvy woman with his hands. I rolled my eyes.

"Merlin you're a pig," I said, turning away from him and walking up the stairs.

Ioan doesn't get to touch Lyra. Even if it was her pig brother who asked me to keep it from happening, I'll still do it.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The summer proved to be an interesting one. For two very surprising reasons.

The first happened in mid-July.

I woke up in the middle of the night to discover Fred and Em's little sister, Lizzie, sitting in the kitchen together, talking. As far as I could tell, Lizzie appeared to be hitting on Fred.

"Fred, are you okay?" she asked, touching his arm. I think there has to be something wrong with this picture. Fred, to the best of my knowledge, likes Em. Who is not Lizzie. Granted, Em dumped him, but still…

"I'm fine, Lizzie," he said. I raised my eyebrow. Fred is a lot of things, but "fine" isn't necessarily one of them.

"Are you sure?" she asked. He nodded. Then to my utter shock and partial horror, she kissed him. This is the problem with lurking at kitchen doors. You see things you really don't want to see.

"What are you doing?" Fred demanded, pushing her off. "You're fourteen."

That filthy hypocrite. He was fourteen when he and Lyra…

"So?" Lizzie asked. I don't want to see this.

"So, I'm sixteen," Fred said. Lizzie rolled her eyes at him. I should walk away now. Like, _now_.

I turned and walked away quickly, trying not to make too much noise. All I'd wanted was a stupid bowl of ice cream.

"What's going on in there?" asked a painfully familiar voice from behind me. I felt my heart stutter and turned around. Ly pushed her long, messy hair out of her face awkwardly.

She's talking to me.

It only took a year and a half.

"Lizzie and Fred," I said, trying not to sound disturbed. She nodded as if it made some sort of sense.

"That should end well," she said. I can't tell if she's as awkward as I am right now or not. I don't like not being able to tell.

"Yeah," I said. "Definitely." She nodded.

"So…" she said slowly. "How are you?"

How am I? James Sirius Potter, what is your status at this current moment?

"I'm…I am," I said. She smiled in a small way. The only thing I could think or hear in my head was "_Rose Weasley,_" in Ly's voice on repeat.

"That's…not the worst thing, I suppose," she said. The strap of her tank top was falling off her shoulder. It took most of my concentration not to stare.

I can't believe this. After everything that happened and didn't happen that should've happened, I'm still…

I'm still in love with her.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"And then I was like, oh hell no, and grabbed the Quaffle and the Dom came out of nowhere and beat the dick head's face in with a Bludger, and then Jack was all like 'zzooom' and grabbed the snitch and we won," Will said, much too enthusiastic and definitely much too drunk.

"I watched that game," Em said. "I played in that game. I have no idea what you're talking about." Will swayed in his seat.

"Roxie, you have any of that hang over cured potion that your dad makes that makes everything better when you wake up after nights like this with you?" I asked. Everyone stared at me instead now.

I may or may not be just as drunk as Will. In my own defence, school starts tomorrow. Which is why Fred, Will, Roxie, Dom, Em, Lucy, Dylan, Al, Sam, Ly and myself are sitting in the Malfoy's attic drinking. Rose and Scor neglected to join us. Merlin only knows why. Maybe they each thought the other was coming and then decided they couldn't be in the same room as each other and buggered off.

"I think so," Roxie said, looking dreamily off into the distance. "Do you guys ever think that maybe we're all weird? In the head?"

"Well fuck me," Fred said. "Of course we are. We're related to our Dad."

"I meant all of us," Roxie said, gesturing at everyone currently in the attic.

"I'm weird in the head," Will said solemnly. "But that's cause I'm part dog."

"Well, we all knew you were a bitch," Fred said, his head lolling sideways to look at Will. Ly burst out laughing and then passed out on the rug.

"She's so pretty," I said quietly.

"Hold it together, mate," Al said, hitting me sloppily in the shoulder.

"I'm going to go put him to bed before he ends up like Ly," Dylan said, standing unsteadily and pulling Al to his feet.

"Night," we chorused. The two of them staggered out and down the stairs.

"Hey, Will?" Em said. I wasn't exactly paying attention, since Lucy and Roxie and Dom looked like they were trying to manoeuver Ly down the stairs. I figured I should probably help.

"Yeah?" Will asked.

"Will you be my boyfriend?" Em asked. This made everyone in the entire room stop moving and turn to look at Em. Fred was slowly turning purple. I should probably stop him from killing Will.

"Sure," Will said. Before Fred could start trying to kill him, Will fell backwards off of his chair and sprawled out on the rug, fast asleep.

"Let's go to sleep now," I suggested, standing up and grabbing Fred's arm. He looked highly confused when Sam grabbed the other arm and we dragged him down the stairs to the room he was sleeping in and locked the door behind us.

"Did that really just happen?" he asked.

"Unfortunately for you, yeah, it did," I said.

"That sucks," Fred said. Sam nodded and fell onto his bed, asleep the moment his head hit the pillow.

"Not as much as what happened with Lyra," I said, more to myself than to Fred.

"I'm sorry," Fred said. I went to say something back, but he was already asleep.

**Review!**


	23. 23: Head Over Feet

**A/N: Hey there everyone. Uh...I don't actually know how to successfully apologize for not updating for three months or whatever, especially since it was the summer holidays and I still didn't. But, uhm...hmm... Oh yeah! And I changed the genre from Drama to Friendship, because, really, it's more about how friends can still manage to stay friends through all manner of shit, rather than the actual drama itself.**

**For everyone who was reading it up until I stopped updating, this next bit is for you:**

**So, at the moment (beginning of fifth year for everyone except James and Fred) the social situation looks like this: Rose and Scorpius are in a Whore War. James is still in love with Ly. James and Fred seem to be able to stand each other again. Fred and Will hate each other's guts massively. Will is dating Em. Roxie, Lucy, Sam, Dylan and Al are unaffiliated with anyone romantically. And also, it is being hinted at that Fred and Lizzie (Em's little sister) are potentially starting something.**

**So yes. Along that vein (non-canon characters):**

**Lyra Malfoy - twin sister of Scorpius Malfoy**

**Emerald and Elizabeth (Em and Lizzie) Zabini - cousins of Scor and Ly, the daughters of Blaise and Daphne Greengrass**

**Dylan Abernathy - muggle born, but with a witch cousin who raised him**

**Frank Longbottom - Neville and Hannah's oldest child**

**Liam Wood - twenty year old son of Oliver Wood and Katie Bell**

**Will Corner - the son of Cho Chang and Michael Corner**

**Sam Baker - muggle born**

**and now -**

**Chapter 23: Head Over Feet (Dom)**

I don't understand how Liam did it. How he managed to put up with Will and Fred and James all being in the same room. Granted, he only had to do it for one game, but…still.

In the name of Merlin's underwear, I may have to kill them all. And find myself entirely new Chasers. Because these three, I swear on my broom, are going to drive me insane.

"Fred, if I see you throw another Quaffle at Will's head I will have you murdered," I called across the pitch. The first game against Ravenclaw is tomorrow. I mean, we're going to win, no questions asked, but it would be nice if my Chasers didn't kill each other in the process.

"You won't just kill me yourself?" Fred called back. I considered it.

"I'll kill you after the game," I conceded. "And, yes, it will be personal."

"Dom, play nicely," Hugo said, flying by. It took most of my will power to keep myself from swinging my beater's bat at him.

"Fuck you," I said. He stuck his tongue out at me and lobbed a Bludger at Jack. I'm so glad he's a seventh year and we won't have to deal with him next year.

"Yes please," Jack said. I cringed.

"I wasn't talking to you, O'Brien," I said. He sneered at me and flew away.

By the time practice was over, I wanted to kill the majority of my team. The only ones who hadn't done anything wrong were Ly and James. Hugo just pissed me off, Jack, well, same deal, and Will eventually retaliated against Fred.

"I hate them all," I said to Ly. The nice thing about only having two girls on the team is that all the guys have to share a locker room and then Ly and I get our own.

She laughed. "I understand," she said. "They just…make you worry, don't they?"

"Very much," I replied. If Will and Fred don't stop trying to kill each other, well, they might actually succeed.

As I got out of the shower and was standing in the middle of the locker room only in a towel, there was a commotion outside the door.

"No! Bad Sam! Stay out here!" said a girl's voice, presumably Roxie. Suddenly the door burst open and Sam walked into the locker room, carrying a nicely wrapped box. Roxie was close behind him.

"I'm sorry, I tried," Roxie said. "I just…failed." Sam looked confused, like he normally does. And he was staring at my towel.

"I just wanted to give her a birthday present," Sam said, holding out the box in my direction. I smiled in what was probably a bemused way.

"Thanks," I said. "You know my birthday was last month, right?" It's November. I was born on October 8th.

"I do now, but I forgot, and then I remembered and I thought that since I had a present for you anyways, I should give it to you," he said. I nodded slowly and tried not to laugh.

"Thank you," I said, taking the box.

"Sam, why are you in the girl's dressing room?" Ly asked, stepping out of the shower as well.

"Giving me a birthday present," I explained. Roxie sighed like she was irritated with him. I don't know why. He's so well intentioned and sweet.

"Your birthday was last month," Ly said.

"I know that now," Sam said. It's amazing how not awkward Sam and Ly are, considering that they slept together. While really, really drunk. That may account for the lack of awkwardness.

"Well, since you haven't seen Dom naked and you don't remember seeing me naked, would you mind leaving while we get dressed?" Ly asked. She didn't sound irritated, just patiently bemused. If I were her, I'd be beyond irritated, most of the time. Except, I'm not her, I'm me, and I'm a generally irritable person.

"Right, sorry," Sam said, ducking out of the room. Roxie rolled her eyes.

"He's so clueless sometimes, isn't he?" she asked. I shrugged. Sure he wasn't the most with it person, but of the people I call "friend" he seems to be the sanest, which unfortunately, isn't saying a lot, since he's sort of nuts.

"So, have you heard from Liam at all recently?" Ly asked, lacing up her shoes.

Ah, Liam.

My friends, bless their hearts, don't know this. None of them do. It's probably for the best.

"He got signed on with Scotland," I said casually, not mentioning why I knew.

"Really?" Roxie asked. "That's fantastic. Good on him."

"But, that's not what I meant," Ly said, raising her eyebrow at me.

"Oh, come on. He finished school two years ago," I said. They exchanged looks and then raised their eyebrows at me.

"My stupid brother is dating a girl two years younger than him," Roxie said. Ly looked faintly queasy.

"Yes, and we don't like to talk about that," I pointed out, grabbing my cloak and leading the way out of the changing rooms.

"But that's because he also dated her older sister and slept with her cousin," Ly said.

"Talking about yourself in third person again?" I asked. Ly rolled her eyes.

"My point is, you and Liam are different than Fred and Lizzie. Now, have you heard from him?" Ly asked.

"Maybe," I said, evasive as best I could be. I don't have quite the same honesty problem that Sam has, but I'm still bad.

"What's going on?" Sam asked. Apparently, he hadn't left the changing area.

"Nothing," I said stubbornly. If there's one thing I got from my mother it's her stubbornness. I think it's the French.

"Bullshit," Roxie said. I looked straight ahead.

"What?" Sam asked. I turned faintly pink.

Suddenly, Roxie squealed excitedly and started jumping up and down before hugging me.

"Dear God, what?" I asked, feeling panicky. There's no way she knows, is there? There's no possible way she could've guessed. Right?

"That's so awesome!" she enthused, continuing to jump. Ly exchanged looks with me, apparently trying to figure out what had Roxie so excited.

"What's so awesome?" Sam asked, sounding disturbed by Roxie's enthusiasm for life.

"Dom's got a boyfriend!" Roxie squealed, finally letting go of me.

Well, fuck.

"How the hell did you figure that out?" I demanded. Roxie shrugged mysteriously.

"I'm magical," she said, before laughing.

"So, you're actually dating Liam?" Ly asked.

"Well, I dunno, yeah," I admitted.

"Cool," Sam said, sounding slightly dark about it. Roxie, Ly and I stopped walking immediately and looked at him in confusion. Sam never sounds dark about anything.

"What's wrong?" I asked. He can't avoid answering direct questions. He can't. I've seen it in action.

"I'm going to go make sure Will and Fred haven't killed each other," he said, turning and walking away very quickly.

"What just happened?" Ly asked.

"I have no idea," I replied.

"I think Sam just avoided answering a question," Roxie said, sounding as stunned as me and Ly.

"Good for him," Ly said finally. I kept staring at his retreating back.

Yes, good for him, but what I want to know is why.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Gryffindor win!"

Not that I'm surprised or anything. Of course we kicked Ravenclaw's ass. There was no way we were going to lose.

The entire house was busy spilling onto the pitch and swarming us, almost to the point where Sam and Roxie, who were making their way towards me got squished. They finally reached me and Roxie hugged me.

"Congratulations," she said, grinning.

"Oh, come on, it's not that big a deal," I said. "We won the cup last year, after all."

"Yeah, but-" Sam started to say, but he was cut off when two strong arms wrapped around me and I was promptly snogged.

"Congratulations," said the voice attached to the person who had his arms around me. I could feel the shocked looks I was getting from James, Fred, Will, Hugo, Jack, and all of the rest of my friends, who were currently staring, slack-jawed, at me and Liam.

"Thanks," I said, grinning.

"Glad to know I made the right choice, picking you as captain," he said, letting go of me. I smiled and took his hand.

"Let's be honest," I said, nodding towards the five boys on the team, who were staring bug-eyed at us with their jaws somewhere near their navels. "Which one of those idiots would you really have picked?"

"Fair enough," he replied, kissing me again.

"Someone hit me," Will said. "I want to be sure I'm not seeing things."

"Okay," Fred said, and before anyone could stop him, he'd decked Will, who recoiled, staggered backwards and landed on his ass in the mud. A hushed, shocked, silence fell over the crowd. Before Will could get back up, Frank and Lizzie melted out of the crowd and started to pull Fred away. They'd gone about ten feet when Will finally got up and stormed towards them, grabbing Fred by the shoulder, spinning him around and flattening him with one punch. Frank and Lizzie let go as the two fell to the mud, preoccupied with beating the shit out of each other.

"Oi!" I yelled, trying to intervene and pull them apart.

"Don't worry, Dom. I've got it," Scor said, smiling without meaning it and diving into the fray. I'm guessing he was using the opportunity to beat the shit out of Fred as well, as some eventual form of retribution for Fred sleeping with Ly.

"Hey," Frank said, trying to pull them off each other again, but instead, he got sucked in as well. Sam ran over to try and help, as did James and Hugo, all three of whom got dragged into it as well.

Eventually, while Roxie, Liam and I stood there watching, the entire house got dragged into the fray until there was a huge brawl taking place in the middle of the Quidditch Pitch.

"You know, theoretically, this is your fault," Roxie said.

"How do you figure?" I asked, grabbing Liam by the arm to keep him from diving in as well.

"Because you were snogging Liam and Will asked for a reality check," Roxie said.

"Ah," I said. "Yeah, even if I hadn't been snogging Liam, your brother would've found a reason to hit your ex-boyfriend and it all would've gone to shit anyways. Since they, you know, hate each other."

"Right," Roxie said.

"What the fuck is going on?" Em asked from behind me, running up and being careful to dodge Al, who was currently engaged in a headlock with a seventh year I couldn't name.

"Your ex punched your boyfriend and it devolved," I summed up, jumping out of the way as a pair of first years went rolling by, covered in mud.

"Oh for the love of Merlin," Em said, sounding tired. "Anyone know why they hate each other as much as they do?"

"Combination of you and me, I think," Roxie said. Em nodded like this made sense. "What with both of them being in love with you at one point or another, and Fred hating Will for sleeping with me."

"Fair enough," Em said. The four of us stood for a moment longer, before I decided I really needed to take a shower and I managed to skirt around the mob into the changing rooms.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The brawl finally concluded itself in true Gryffindor fashion – with a raging party in the Tower.

This is where I found myself an hour and a half later, leaning against a balcony with a bottle of Firewhiskey in one hand and Liam's arm around my waist.

"Good to see some things never change," Liam said, nodding downwards at the mosh pit that had formed. Honestly, if I wanted to, I could jump off the balcony and instantly be crowd surfing. It's fun.

In the middle of the mob, I could see Will and Em dancing near Al and Dylan, who each had a bottle of alcohol a piece. Al should have fun stories tomorrow, if he remembers them. Fred and Lizzie were close to the epicentre without actually touching it, and from my vantage point, I could see both Rose and Scorpius on the prowl for someone to take back to their dorms. I rolled my eyes. James and Frank were around, sharing a bottle with Lucy, while I could see Ly sitting in the next balcony over with her legs dangling off. Unusually, she wasn't drinking. But she was staring at something in a very confused way. I followed her gaze. Roxie was pulling Sam onto the dance floor. And laughing. And he kept smiling at something she was saying. And they were being cute. Very, very cute.

"What's wrong?" Liam asked me, startling me back to the present.

"What?" I asked.

"You look concerned about something," he said. Concerned? Why would I look concerned?

"No," I said. "I shouldn't. I'm not worried about anything." As I said it, the music changed to a slow song.

"Would you like to dance?" Liam asked in a teasing tone of voice.

"Isn't our standby at these parties snogging?" I asked.

"Oh, right, sorry. I forgot in my old age," he said. I laughed and kissed him, but as I did, I saw Roxie lay her head on Sam's chest and put her arms around his neck, and Sam put his arms around her waist.

Oh my god. Does Roxie like Sam?

I let go of Liam and made a break for the narrow hallways that lead between the balconies.

"Dom? Where are you going?" Liam called after me in confusion. I ignored him and fell down next to Ly.

"What's up?" she asked.

"Does Roxie like Sam?" I demanded.

"What?" Ly asked.

"Does. Roxie. Like. Sam?" I repeated. Ly looked trapped.

"Yes," she said finally. My jaw dropped. I can't believe she didn't tell me. I thought she was my best friend. And she likes Sam and didn't tell me? Why?

"Why didn't she tell me?" I asked. Ly looked trapped again, but was saved from answering by electronic feedback. We both jumped and looked towards the source of the disturbance. Dylan had a microphone and was waving at everyone from near the table where the booze is held.

"Hey, there, hey everyone," he slurred. "Sorry to interrupt your lovely slow dance but I thought I should probably tell you all, since you're all here and everything, and well, I thought some of you might want to know that-"

"Get on with it, mate," someone yelled from the crowd.

"What is he doing?" Ly asked.

"I have no idea," I replied.

Dylan cleared his throat and grinned like he was particularly pleased with himself.

"How drunk is he?" I asked.

"I'm guessing very," Ly said.

"Just thought you all should know," Dylan said, "that I'm gay."

**The title of this chapter is after the Alanis Morissette song, Head Over Feet. It may not seem like it applies to the narrator of this particular chapter at this particular time, but trust me. It does.**

**Review!**


	24. 24: I'm Not Okay I Promise

**A/N: So, this chapter, in the grand scheme of things, isn't all that important, but it introduces some things that are about to become important. **

**On a completely else note, I just updated two chapters in one day! Both of which I actually wrote today! Muahahahahahaha...I'm so awesome sometimes. Not always, but sometimes... Anywhoodles, the next chapter is important, and as some of you kept asking for**** back when I was regularly updating, the Whore War is back in full force next chapter. **

**Anyone still reading, I love you.**

**Chapter 24 - I'm Not Okay (I Promise) (Ly)**

So, I wouldn't say it surprised me that Dylan is gay, but…

But the next morning was very, very awkward.

I ditched Dom and Roxie and Lucy and Rose and went to breakfast all by myself. Or I tried. But on my way through the common room, Dylan caught up to me.

"Hey, Ly," he said.

"Dylan," I acknowledged. He was acting completely normal, albeit hung over, so I wasn't entirely sure what to make of him. I opened the portrait hole and we walked out, passing Scor on our way.

"Hey, sis," he said. He ignored Dylan completely and pushed past us into the common room.

"What was that about?" Dylan asked. I glanced sideways at him.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Why did Scor look at me like I'd gone mad?" he elaborated.

"Erm…" I said.

He doesn't remember. He came out of the closet and doesn't even remember opening the fucking door. That can't be good.

This shall not end well.

Before I could say anything, Al and some girl ran up to us. I noticed that they were holding hands. She was relatively pretty and as far as I could remember, she was called Amanda Jenkins and was in our year in Hufflepuff.

"Hey guys," Al said, looking greatly enthused by life. Dylan and I exchanged worried looks. Al almost never sounds like this. Ever. Except when very, very drunk. Except, he seems stone cold sober.

"Hey," we said in unison.

"This is my girlfriend, Amanda," Al said, smiling brightly. My eyebrows hit my hairline. Dylan's jaw dropped slightly.

"Hi, Amanda," I said, recovering from the shock factor first.

"Hello," Dylan said politely. Amanda smiled awkwardly at him.

"So, Lyra, I didn't know you and Al were such good friends," she said to me. I glanced at Al.

"Well, yeah, we are," I said. "Dylan's really his best friend though."

As one, Dylan and Al shot me looks. Dylan's seemed to be saying, "Why do you have to point that out? Everyone knows that." Al's seemed to be saying, "Do you have to say that in front of my girlfriend?"

I do not know what's going on.

"Er, Dylan, let's go to breakfast," I suggested, grabbing him by the wrist and running down the stairs.

"Do you have any idea what that was all about?" Dylan asked. I stopped running once Amanda and Al were out of sight.

"Yeah," I said. "I think I might. How much do you remember about last night?"

"Not much beyond the brawl in the Quidditch Pitch, why?" he asked.

I bit my lip. "You said some things that were either true, or just you being drunk and talking out your ass. If that was just you talking out your ass, then everyone _thinks_ you are, but if it was actually true, then everyone knows."

"Was that English?" he asked. "What exactly did I say?"

"You grabbed a microphone and the combined attention of everyone in the Tower and told them you were gay," I said quickly.

His eyes went wide and his mouth fell open a little bit. Then he closed his mouth and nodded slightly to himself. "You've seen _Shrek_ right?"

"You know me," I said. "I love everything Muggle."

He nodded again. "Well, better out than in, I always say."

OOooOOooOOooOO

A few days later, I got back from dinner in time to hear confused sounding yelling from my dormitory. Warily I opened the door.

"Well, why didn't you tell me?" Dom asked Roxie, looking very confused. Oh the Sam thing again. I don't get why this is such a big deal.

"I didn't think you'd find it interesting," Roxie said evasively. Lucy snorted from her bed, flipping a page in her magazine. Rose glanced at her while digging through the closet the two of them shared.

"Do you mind if I borrow this?" Rose asked, holding up a skimpy black dress that belonged to Lucy. She would be raiding our closet, except Rose is three inches shorter than the three of us, and doesn't wear the same size clothes as we do.

"No, by all means," Lucy said. The edge in her voice made all four of us turn and stare at her. "You do realise that this whole thing is pointless, right?"

"What whole thing?" Rose asked, pretending to seem innocent. Yet, at the same time, she's gotten about eighteen times more action than a part Veela who happens to be in the same dorm as her. I really wish I didn't know that Rose has slept with seventeen guys or something sick like that, but unfortunately, I do. Because my psychotic brother tells me these things. I really don't want to know them, but apparently, I don't get a choice in the matter. My point is, I'm the second most corrupted of the girls in our dormitory, second to Rose, but Rose has slept with almost nine times as many guys as I have. My real point – Rose is not innocent.

"Your stupid Whore War," Lucy said, turning another page.

"Fine, I won't borrow the dress," Rose said, looking slightly wigged about Lucy calling her on something.

"Right," Lucy said, still looking simultaneously disinterested and pissed off.

"See you all later," Rose said, walking out the door.

"What was that about?" I asked.

"It's stupid," Lucy said, shrugging. "They're both being stupid, and one of them is going to get fucked up."

Oh god. Scorpius would go and get some girl pregnant, wouldn't he? That would be so like the new him.

"Right, well, we have practise, Ly," Dom said.

"Yeah, okay," I said, grabbing my broom and Quidditch robes off the floor. At least, I thought they were mine until I realised they actually said "Weasley 03" on them. I glanced over at Dom, who was already wearing her Quidditch robes.

"Dom, what's on the back of your robes?" I asked.

"Why?" she replied, turning around to try and see the back in the mirror. I held up the robes in my hand. "Oh," she said. "Sorry." She pulled her robes off and handed them to me. I pulled them on. We'd made it to the fifth floor when we realised as one that Fred and Will were walking in dangerous proximity to each other.

"I've got it," Dom said, running ahead to catch them.

"I'm so glad he doesn't hate me anymore," said a painfully familiar voice from behind me.

There's no way he's talking to me is there? I mean, actually _talking_ to me. Me. There's no way. Right?

"Yeah, I would be glad if I were you too," I said cautiously. James fell into stride next to me.

"Having your best friend secretly be anything is sort of…stupid," he said. "Whether it's hate or anything else."

"Speaking of best friends gone off colour, do you know what's up with your brother?" I asked. He raised his eyebrow and half smiled in a confused way. I felt my heart break just a little bit more. He always did have the best smile.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "What's wrong with him?"

"Well, he's been avoiding Dylan like the plague since he came out and keeps ditching to go snog Amanda whenever it's down to him, Dylan and one other person," I explained. "He's not homophobic, is he?"

"I don't know how he could be, really," James said. "He's never had any problems with Hugo."

"Maybe because Dylan's his best friend he thinks it's different," I pointed out. "Maybe he's worried Dylan's in lov-" I slapped my hand over my mouth and realised two things simultaneously.

The first was that I was actually talking to James. Really actually talking to him. For the first time in almost two years.

The second was that I knew exactly why Al was being awkward around Dylan. I just didn't know if I could say anything that wouldn't make people suspicious.

"He's worried what?" James asked, staring down at me in confusion.

"Nothing," I said quickly, sprinting off to go find Dom.

I know exactly what's going on.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"I just, long distance relationships and all, it just didn't, well, it wasn't going to work out."

"You don't know that unless you stick with it," Roxie pointed out.

"Yes, I do," Dom replied, digging through the heap of newly returned laundry in the middle of the dormitory floor.

"What are you looking for?" I asked.

"The socks with beaters' bats and Bludgers on them," Dom replied, digging further through the pile. "The ones your dad got me as a birthday present."

"Oh, right," Roxie said, digging through as well. She held up the socks in question a moment later.

"Anyone seen the grey sweater?" I asked.

This is our Christmas tradition, since we don't actually get to spend Christmas together.

"Holy shit!" Roxie said suddenly, holding up a very questionable piece of purple lacy lingerie. "Which one of us owns this?"

"It's not mine," I said.

"Are you sure?" Dom asked. I nodded. I only ever buy normal bras and I don't exactly have a mother to buy me scandalous ones anymore.

"Positive," I replied. Roxie has a theory that its fate the three of us became roommates and best friends, since we've all stayed precisely the same size everything, even though that size has changed over the past five years. Therefore, the questionable bra would fit any one of us, no matter its origins.

"Want it for the Christmas holidays?" Roxie teased, waving it in my direction.

"I'm going to stay in a house with my two female cousins, my twin brother and one of our very openly gay best friends. What use could I possibly have for that?" I asked.

"Fair enough," Roxie said. "Maybe I'll take it." She grinned mischievously. Some dark shadow passed across Dom's face.

"To what end?" she asked. "We're staying in a house that is entirely full of people we're related to, with the sole exception of a few middle aged women who do not share our DNA and my married twenty four year old brother in law."

"I was kidding," Roxie said, looking worried. She glanced at me for some explanation, which I didn't have.

"Right," Dom said, obviously trying to calm down slightly.

"So, why exactly did you ditch Liam again?" I asked. I've never dumped anyone, so I don't really understand the ins and outs of it.

"Long distance relationships aren't my thing," Dom said, looking down under the pretext of digging for clothes.

Roxie glanced at me for explanation again. I shrugged. I still didn't have any.

"He was rubbish in bed, wasn't he?" Roxie asked. I laughed, because to the best of my knowledge, there was no way Dom had actually slept with him. Roxie laughed because she thought she was just teasing.

Dom, on the other hand, dropped her head into her hands and started laughing in a nervous breakdown type way. "God yes," she said. "He was absolutely terrible."

"Oh my god! You slept with Liam?" Roxie squealed.

"Yes," Dom replied, still rocking back and forth slightly.

"I'm sorry he was terrible, but I'm still proud of you!" Roxie said, hugging her from the side.

"Oh, does that really mean that besides Al and Dylan, I'm the last one?" Lucy asked as she walked in the door.

"Why don't Al and Dylan count?" I asked. Lucy shrugged evasively. I wonder if she thinks the same things I think. I'll have to investigate this further.

"Yes, you are," Dom said.

Wait.

That means James has slept with someone.

That hurts a lot more than I thought it would. Namely because it's one of those stabbing sensations in my stomach that reminds me, just like his smile, that I'm still in love with him and I probably will never regain his trust.

"Who did James sleep with?" I asked quietly, trying to act casual. All three of them stared at me with some sort of pitying look in their eyes.

"Erm…it was last year," Lucy said. "Some girl in his year. Daphne, I think was her name."

"Right," I said. "Right."

I threw a pair of poorly folded jeans and a purple tank top into my rucksack with more violence than was probably necessary.

"Ly, are you okay?" Roxie asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Fine. Why?"

"You just seem…" she started.

"Fine," Dom finished. "She seems fine." I smiled gratefully at her. But at the same time, I had to think, if she was willing to lie and say I seemed fine when I obviously wasn't, it probably meant she wasn't okay herself. And now I want to know why she isn't okay.

**For once, the title actually plays into one of the statements made in the chapter. No way. It's also the title of my favourite My Chemical Romance song...**

**Anyways, review! (Please?)**


	25. 25: Tear You Apart

**A/N: Three chapters in two days? No way... I'm on a roll! Maybe it's because it's my birthday. That could definitely be it. Anyways, the very beginning internal monologue of this chapter is a play on the lyrics to "I'll Be Home for Christmas" in case that doesn't immediately come to you. And, as promised, it's part of the Whore War, because it's Scor narrating and he's the originator of the Whore War in context, even if Rose came up with the name. Personally, I like this chapter, but you may all hate me. Well, actually, if you don't hate me by now with this story, you probably won't hate me for this, so, never mind.**

**Read and Review!  
>Mousie<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 25: Tear You Apart (Scor) <strong>

I don't want to be home for Christmas. There will be snow, and mistletoe and presents under the tree, but no, you cannot count on me. Because I am not to be trusted. Because, in case you've forgot, I'm a dick head who doesn't have any emotions.

Nevertheless, I walked into my apartment with a pit of dread in my stomach. The world was quickly approaching the two year anniversary of my mother's death. It's not a fun time in the Malfoy household. Regardless of that fact, being greeted with biscuits and a smiling face does tend to brighten the mood. Unfortunately, it's also a sorry reminder that I'm stuck in my house all of the Christmas Holidays, and there are all of three girls here who are near my age, and I'm related to all of them by blood. Apparently, I could sleep with Dylan if I wanted to, but I really don't swing that way.

"Hey, everyone, how was term?" Amy asked us as we filed past her into the flat.

"Fine," we all grumbled.

"Anything interesting happen?" she asked as we walked into the kitchen as a mob. Ly and Dylan immediately claimed the barstools, leaving me, Em and Lizzie to lean against the counters. Amy set the tray of biscuits on the central island and walked over to the oven to pull yet more biscuits out of it. Apparently, it's a tradition she and Dylan had before they moved in with us.

"I suppose," Em said. The four of us looked pointedly at Dylan, who turned faintly pink.

"What?" Amy asked interestedly. Dylan cleared his throat.

"Hi, my name's Dylan, I'm officially gay now," he said.

"Well done," Amy said, turning around to pull out another batch of sugar from the oven.

"How do you mean?" Ly asked.

"When he was three, he walked out of our grandmother's closet where he was playing and said, 'look! I came out of the closet!' and I've known since then," Amy said.

"Since I was three?" Dylan asked, looking worried.

"Mmm," Amy replied.

"Oh," he said, turning red and eating a biscuit.

"So, where are our dads?" Em asked.

"Your dad," Amy said, looking at me and Ly, "is out grocery shopping for Christmas dinner on Minty's behest."

"Dad left the house?" I asked in shock. To the best of my knowledge, he's left the house twice since Mum died. The first time was for her funeral, and the second was last Christmas when we went and visited her grave.

"Yes he did," Amy replied. "And _your_ dad," she said, nodding at Em and Lizzie, "is on a date." Em, Ly, and Lizzie's jaws dropped. I was more confused beyond words.

"Really?" the three girls asked in unison.

"Really," Amy replied.

That's not right. That can't be right. You're not supposed to heal after a divorce. You're not supposed to leave the house once your wife dies. You're supposed to be stuck in the broken format. Which is why I'm avoiding love at all costs. Because when it leaves, you're fucked. Those wounds don't heal. Ever.

Right?

OOooOOooOOooOO

We got back to Hogwarts on January third.

Dylan and I walked into our dorm to discover something I never thought I'd see.

To my chagrin, I've seen Sam naked before. I have lived with him for the past five years.

However, I have not seen Roxie naked before.

And now I completely understand why Will dated her. I know he was blathering on about being in love with her or something, but…holy shit, that girl is hot.

And she's having sex with one of my dorm mates.

Very quickly, Dylan and I backed out of the room and sat down on the stairs.

"You look like you used to," he commented. I raised my eyebrow and quickly adopted the asshole persona I'm attempting to maintain.

"Like I used to when?" I asked, purposely playing dumb.

"When you were human," he replied.

"Don't joke about things like that. We've got friends who I'm not so sure about," I said.

"Who?" he asked. "The two going at it in there?" He nodded towards the door.

"No, I think they're both human enough. Never sure about Sam," I said. "Although I have to say…the Weasley women are a sight to behold, aren't they?"

He stared at me pointedly.

"Not that you're exactly looking," I added. "But from an objective stand point…"

"From an objective, completely non-sexual standpoint, yes, the Weasley women are beautiful," he said.

"Why are you sitting outside the door?" Will asked, walking up the stairs with his bag and sitting down next to me.

"Because Sam is having a very good day," I replied.

"Probably not as good as Roxie, at least as Ly tells it," Dylan said.

"Sam and Roxie?" Will asked, sounding beyond confused.

"Sam and a very, very naked Roxie," I said, smiling lecherously.

"Scor is a might bit fixated on the fact Roxie was naked when we walked in," Dylan said for Will's benefit.

"Well, yeah, you would be too," Will said. Then he paused and remembered who he was talking to. "If you weren't, you know, gay and all."

"Thank you," Dylan said.

"Anytime," Will said.

"What's going on?" Al asked, sitting down next to Dylan.

"Sam. Roxie. Sex," Will summed up.

"Ah," Al said. "Good for Sam."

"Better for Roxie," Dylan said. "Because according to Ly…"

"Yes, we know, my sister said he was amazing in bed," I said. "Do you have to bring it up?"

"Yes," Dylan said.

"But seriously, who would've thought…Sam and Roxie," Will said. "She's so hot and he's so…clueless."

"Jealous?" Al asked.

"No, not at all," Will said. "My own girlfriend is more than hot enough for me." He grinned wolfishly. "Besides. I've been there," he added, gesturing at the dormitory door. "Long before Sam ever was."

"True enough," Al said.

"And he's my best friend. I'm not going to begrudge him getting laid, even if it is with my ex-girlfriend," Will said. "Bros before hoes."

"We have very good friends who that didn't quite work out for," Dylan pointed out. We glanced down the stairs as one at the sixth year dorms where James and Fred theoretically were.

"Why is it always my sister?" I asked.

"It's not," Al said comfortingly, reaching around Dylan and clapping me on the shoulder. "It's also your ex-best friend."

Rose.

Fuck Rose.

Merlin, I'd like to fuck Rose.

Even after two years of forcing myself not to feel, I still can't deny that I'd like her naked. It is something I want from life that I have no idea how to get. And, please mind, I can get any girl in Hogwarts. Except Rose. Originally, that was by design, but now I'm regretting it, because with all her experience, she's got to be quite talented by now.

"So, Willy," Al said. "You ever going to tell us what your super-secret project is with McGonagall and Spinet?"

"The one that's been going on since third year?" Dylan added. "Which, I'd like to say was two years ago and you still haven't told us."

"Well, maybe someday I will," Will said.

"When will that be?" Al asked.

"Well, you know, when I'm done," Will said.

"Done with what?"

"Because we'd sort of like to know."

"And it might also be nice to know why the fuck you lot are sitting on the stairs outside your room."

As one, the four of us looked up into the very confused and critical faces of James, Fred and Frank Longbottom.

"We're out here because your sister is getting laid," I said, smiling brightly at Fred, who looked nauseous. Then the three of them looked at the four of us and as one, their jaws dropped.

"She's shagging Sam?" James asked in confusion.

I don't understand James. He's supposed to still hate his best friend, Fred, for shagging my sister. He's supposed to still be mad at Lyra for shagging Fred instead of him. And yet…at the same time, he's actually talking to both of them.

Why are people so…inconsistent?

That's what I'd like to know.

"Right, well, this has been fun," I said, standing up and leaving my bag on the stairs. "But I've got people to do. See you all later."

I ran down the stairs into the common room and was stopped halfway to the portrait hole by a well-manicured hand that put itself on my chest and ever so lightly dug it's nails in. Blood red nails, I'd like to add. That match her recently dyed blood red hair. That's new.

"Rosie," I said, smiling coldly. "You dyed your hair. I hope you didn't do that just for me."

"Only in your wildest dreams, Malfoy," she said coldly. I raised my eyebrow.

"You know arrogance isn't an attractive quality in a woman," I said. Who am I kidding? The colder she gets the more I want her. Except that's not okay, since that would mean she'd win our stupid fucking game.

"Well, funny enough, I think I've got a score of men who would disagree with you on that," she replied.

"Do you?" I asked. "A full score? Strangely, that sounds sort of like my name."

"Oh, no, sorry, you're not one of them," she said, smirking at me. "Since you've never laid a hand on me."

"I think Ioan would beg to differ on that," I said. She glared at me this time, with full conviction and an actual emotion in her eyes. Those are funny, emotions. So pointless. They just get you hurt.

"Ioan knows we never," she said.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked. I know perfectly well that Ioan is now aware of that, but I'm not sure she is. "Because the last time I talked to him…"

The last time I talked to him was halfway through charms right before the Christmas Holidays, at which point he reminded me we weren't even yet, because he hasn't gone after my sister yet. It took the combined force of Sam, Will, Al and Dylan to keep me from trying to kill him right then and there.

"Well, Ioan is just misguided then, isn't he?" Rose asked, digging her nails further into my chest.

"Very," I agreed.

"Anyway, don't let me get in your way of your night's conquest. I just thought I'd let you know that when I say a score of men would disagree with you, I do actually mean twenty," she said, smiling icily at me and walking away.

She's at twenty?

How the fuck did she get to twenty before me? This is not okay.

With renewed vigour, I ran out the portrait hole and towards the tower.

I have to win.

OOooOOooOOooOO

By May, we were all getting ready to sit the OWLs, except for Fred and James, who kept leaning over all of our text books during meals and laughing at us.

"I swear to Merlin, Fred, if you don't stop laughing at me, I'm going to get Mum to hex you into oblivion," Roxie said, leaning against Sam's shoulder for comfort.

"But Charms will be easy," Sam said, apparently trying to comfort her.

"Maybe for you," Em said, rubbing Will's back soothingly. The bastard may be fantastic at Transfiguration, but he's terrible at Charms.

"Oh come on, we've been palling around with Sam long enough we should've been able to osmosis some of the mythically fantastic Charms knowledge he has," Dylan said, smiling brightly at all of us and taking a picture. I glared at him. Even though I haven't let the stupid Whore War interfere with my studies, that doesn't mean I want to sit through the OWLs.

"And we've been hanging around with Will long enough we should understand Transfiguration," Dom said, looking hopelessly at her text book.

"And, I mean, Ly created a potion in her second year that is a best seller," Al said, nodding at my sister, who turned faintly pink when she glanced at James.

"Hey, I helped," James said.

"Right, right, of course you did," Al said. His very irritating blonde girlfriend laughed. Something about her seems relatively familiar to me, except I can't quite figure out why.

Maybe…oh. Right. Sixteen.

I wonder if Al knows I slept with his girlfriend…

"So, that's only Potions, Charms and Transfiguration," Ly said. "We've got a bunch of other classes that we don't specialise in. What are we supposed to do about them?"

"Fail," I said helpfully.

"Fuck you," Ly replied.

"No, you're my sister," I said, smiling at her.

"Yeah, at least you're better than some people," Lucy said darkly from next to me. She only said it loudly enough that I could hear.

"How do you mean?" I asked. Lucy looks a little bit like Rose if you look at her from the side. They've got the same nose, and they've both got curly hair, even if Lucy's is brown, rather than red like Rose's. And they've both got freckles. That's sort of where the similarities stop though.

Lucy pushed her glasses up her nose and kept reading her Charms book. "Your stupid game is hurting people," she said.

I tried to think back to the last time I'd had a one on one conversation with Lucy. The only thing I could come up with was the summer before third year, right after Rose and I had admitted to being best friends.

I may not have let the Whore War interfere with my studies, but I definitely let it interfere with my friends.

"Who got hurt?" I asked.

"My sister," Lucy said. I tried to remember what her sister's name was. I think it's Molly or something.

"How did your sister get hurt?" I asked.

"Because Rose slept with her boyfriend," Lucy said.

That's low. That's really low. You're not supposed to fuck with your own family.

"I'll be back in a minute," I said, standing up and walking out of the Great Hall. As expected, Rose was in an abandoned classroom right off the hall, snogging some seventh year Ravenclaw. He looked disturbed when I walked in and quickly bowed out.

"What's your problem?" Rose asked me, glaring.

"You don't fuck with your family," I said. "You don't sleep with your cousin's boyfriend. That's playing dirty."

"This is a dirty game, Malfoy," she said, crossing her arms. "And apparently, you're too scared to play dirty. Which means I'm going to win."

I glared at her and backed her against the wall, with one hand on the stones next to her head and the other on the stones next to her waist so that she was trapped.

"And how would winning make you feel, Rosie?" I asked, glaring directly into her chocolate coloured eyes. I've stared a fair few girls in the eyes, but none of their eyes have been quite the same shade of brown as Rose's.

"Nothing would make me happier," she replied icily, crossing her arms and pushing her breasts up, whether it was on purpose or not. What is it with the Weasleys and being stacked?

I let a cruel smirk run across my face.

"See, Rosie, that's your problem trying to beat me at this game," I said. "You still feel."

"What? It's about hiding your emotions entirely?" she asked, glaring right back at me.

"No, Rosie," I said. "It's about not having any to begin with."

With that, I walked out of the classroom and slammed the door shut behind me. If she can play dirty, if she wants to play dirty, I'll give her dirt. I am a filthy and vile person after all.

And so I marched into the Great Hall back over to where my friends were sitting. And I walked straight over to the seat where I had been sitting before going to yell at Rose.

At my approach, everyone looked up in confusion, but I didn't bother looking at any of them, especially not Dylan, who was clearly judging me. I don't care anymore.

Rose is going to wish she never tried to start this stupid game.

I grabbed Lucy somewhat gently by the wrist and pulled her out of her seat.

"Scor, what are you doing?" she asked, raising her eyebrows in obvious confusion. I didn't say anything, but glanced towards the doors, in time to see Rose walk in and look confused.

I took that as my cue.

"Changing the game," I muttered, before I pulled Lucy close and kissed her.

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><p><strong>I'm only slightly evil and deranged... Only slightly. The chapter title is from the song "Tear You Apart" by the band She Wants Revenge...It's essentially Rose and Scorpius's song...<strong>

**Review!**


	26. 26: Smells Like Teen Spirit

**A/N: So, yes. I am not dead. No, I have not updated for two months and a day, but I am now updating. My senior year is completely mad. That is my only explanation. I apologise for not updating sooner, especially considering how the last chapter ended. On the bright side, for everyone who is still reading who is looking at their updates and thinking to themselves, "Oh, yeah. Don't Panic. I remember that story. Sort of. It was really convoluted and I do not for the life of me remember what is going on right now," this chapter was intended to be a catchup chapter when I planned it many months ago. I also did something foolish, like introduce a new character, since we don't have enough to be getting on with. Sorry about that. **

**Anyone still reading this,**

**I love you.**

**Mousie**

**26: Smells Like Teen Spirit (Lucy)**

The next few days were chaos, to say the least. Absolute chaos. And for once, I wasn't sitting idly on the side lines observing the chaos. I was part of it. Hell, I was part of the cause.

I have never been happier to have a family member want me dead.

Getting involved in their game is making me realise why they even bother. It's sort of…fun. Especially since getting involved means I get to snog a very tall, very attractive boy quite frequently. And that's just good times.

"Everyone ready for the potions OWL?" Ly asked, sitting up in bed and shaking her hair out.

"No," Roxie replied, covering her face in her pillow.

"Come on, Rox, it'll be fun," Dom said, glaring at Roxie, even though Roxie couldn't see her. I've got a theory that Dom is in love with Sam and didn't realise it until Roxie asked him out.

"In what universe is sitting a practical potions exam fun?" Roxie asked, sitting up.

"Mine," Ly replied.

"Well, aren't you just special?" Roxie asked.

"Yes, I am thank you," Ly replied. "Lucy, are you ready for the exam?"

"Well, I tend to go more for, 'how successfully can I fake it' rather than actual preparedness," I said. The other three laughed while Rose laughed derisively.

Good. I'm glad she hates me right now. Because she's been driving me insane for the past two years.

"What other kind of faking are you having to do, Lucy?" Rose asked, fixing her hair in a hand mirror.

"What are you implying, Rose?" I asked in the same icy tone she was using. I saw Roxie, Dom and Ly exchange worried looks.

"I'm sure she doesn't have to fake _that_," Roxie said. "She is dating a reported sex god after all."

No. No, I don't have to fake that. She's right.

"Can we not talk about my brother shagging people?" Ly asked, looking mildly ill.

"We weren't," Dom said. "We were talking about Lucy shagging people."

"Clever," Rose said, sounding bitter. She pulled on her robes and headed for the door. "I'll see you all later." The door slammed behind her.

I smiled.

"It's just more pleasant in here without her, isn't it?" I asked.

"Yeah," Roxie and Dom agreed. Ly looked awkward.

"I got roped into being her best friend," Ly said. "I'm sort of required not to agree with you."

"Right," I said. "Sorry about that."

"Well, I'm going to go find Sam," Roxie said. "Try and calm him down before the test and all." Once upon a time, Sam and Will were my best friends. And then they started dating girls and stopped being friends with them. Rather unfortunate, that.

"Bye," Dom and Ly said in unison.

"I'm going to go find Dylan and protect him from Alamanda," Dom said. "Merlin knows someone has to." The door closed behind her.

Ly raised her eyebrow at me. I mirrored her expression.

"You notice things," she said slowly.

"About what in particular?" I asked.

"Our friends," she replied. "Specifically, say, Alamanda and Dylan."

I nodded. "What's your theory?" I asked.

"That Al, while not homophobic himself, is too scared to admit to being gay and the fact his best friend came out makes him feel awkward, so he buried himself in a girl," Ly said.

I nodded in agreement. "I'll do you one better. I think he's also in love with Dylan which is part of the problem."

"Then we're in agreement," Ly said. "Good to know. So, are you really dating my brother?"

I nodded. "It appears that way, doesn't it?" I asked.

She shook her head in confusion. "Alright then."

"Shall we go to breakfast?" I asked. She nodded.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"How did you do? I think I did terribly. I don't know how I would've failed though. I'm not unintelligent. I'm just bad at potions. Potions are not my strong suit. I'm only good at Charms and, I've been told, girls. But I have problems with everything else. Like honesty. I'm bad at honesty. And potions. I'm horrible at potions. And now I've gone and got a T on my OWL and my family will have no idea what that means because they're Muggles!" Sam ranted with his face buried in Roxie's shoulder.

"It'll be okay, honey," Roxie said, petting the back of his head.

Will and Em were sitting next to them looking much more relaxed than Sam was. They should be too, as we're now done with our OWLs entirely. And of course, Sam chooses this moment to panic. He panics a lot.

Dom was sitting across the table from Sam and Roxie, glaring at her plate with a murderous look in her eye that got worse every time she looked up and saw Sam and Roxie. Dylan was staring pensively at his pasta and eating small bites with a slightly green look on his face like he was going to be sick. I didn't blame him, as Alamanda was on the other side of him, stuck together at the mouth.

Ly, James, Fred and Frank had evaporated immediately after the test was over. I was only mildly worried about them.

"What are you thinking about?" Scor whispered next to me. I shrugged and ate a sugar mouse from my pocket.

Two years ago, we were not like this. None of us were. Not a single one of us is where we were on track to be. Well, Ly and James seem to be picking up the pieces well enough, but the rest of us aren't. Dom should be comforting Sam, not Roxie. Amanda shouldn't be here, much less be half of the creature known as Alamanda. Al and Dylan should both be out of the closet, or at least be living in it comfortably together. Roxie and I should be single. Rose, as much as I hate to say it, should be where I'm siting, with Scorpius's arms around her. Somehow, everything got backwards.

"Our friends and the madness they've all succumbed to," I said. Scor looked down the table suspiciously.

"Fair," he replied, kissing me on the neck. I smiled.

"Has anyone seen Fred?"

Everyone on our side of the table turned to look at Lizzie Zabini.

"Not recently, no. Why?" Em asked her little sister.

"I just haven't seen him either," Lizzie said.

"Get worried when he disappears?" Roxie asked, smiling. "Don't worry. My brother's just an idiot. He won't go get himself killed on accident or anything."

"I'm not worried about accidents," Lizzie said, glancing sideways at Will.

"Hey, now," Will said. "It's not like I'd actually kill him."

Before anyone could say anything else, a large quantity of purple goo dropped from the ceiling and plastered itself to everyone in the hall from about where Will was sitting to the teachers' table. This meant that we were about the only people in the entire hall not covered in purple goo. Will was not so lucky.

Everyone in the hall screamed and jumped up, trying to wipe the goo off, in most cases failing, and as the teachers started yelling at everyone to calm down, it turned into a goo fight.

Thinking they were being sneaky, Fred, James, Frank and Ly sidled in the door into the chaos.

"Fred, I'm going to kill you!" Will yelled, jumping out of his seat, covered in goo, and running towards Fred. Fred turned pale and sprinted back out the door, leaving a laughing Frank, Ly and James behind him. Will dashed out the door after him.

"I worry," Em said.

"If your boyfriend kills mine, I'm never talking to you again," Lizzie said. Em rolled her eyes.

Al was trying to comfort Amanda, who had got gooed on. I glanced down the table. Rose was covered in the purple goo and looked very put out.

I stood up and walked towards the door. Scor followed me. I paused at Ly, James and Frank.

"I don't know how you did it, but it was wonderful," I said, smiling at the three of them.

"Thanks," Ly said, beaming at me. I smiled back at her and carried on towards the stairs. As Scor and I reached them, Fred came sprinting out of an abandoned classroom, dashed up the stairs past us without a word, hit the top step of the marble staircase and kept going. Seconds later, Will took the same path. Eventually he caught up at the top of one of the moving staircases, at which point the two of them went barrelling off the end and into thin air. Scor and I glanced at each other and ran up the stairs after them.

With trepidation, we looked over the edge to see the two of them sprawled on the staircase below, unconscious.

"Did you see where they went?" Em asked from behind us. I mute horror, we turned around. She and Lizzie were standing there looking cross with each other.

"Erm…" I said, glancing over the edge of the stair.

"They've taken a wee tumble off the cliff," Scor said, glancing over as well.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Madam Pomfrey managed to discharge Fred and Will from the hospital wing in time for them to come home for the summer holidays. She seemed glad to be shot of them, since they apparently kept swatting each other with fly swatters the whole time they were in lock up.

"I don't understand why they hate each other so much," Em complained as we sat on the train home. "It just…it seemed like the best choice, you know?"

I nodded as though I understood why she'd broken up with Will.

"Sure," I said. I glanced around the compartment I was in. Em was sitting next to me. Ly, Fred, Frank and Dom made up the rest of the compartment. In addition to Em breaking up with Will, Lizzie had broken up with Fred. Both boys were more than a little upset about it.

"I'm going to run to the loo," I said, standing up and making my escape. I had somehow ended up in the compartment of all my friends who currently aren't feeling good about the universe. It wasn't somewhere I particularly wanted to be.

I heard a loud game of exploding snap coming from the next compartment over. It didn't sound particularly appealing either. So I made my way down the corridor in the centre of the train until I found a compartment that had someone in it I knew.

When I was a child, my mother enforced play dates for me and Molly with her best friend's, Rolf, children, Lorcan and Lysander. It was convenient that all of us lived in Ottery St. Catchpole along with Grandmum and Granddad Weasley. Dad was a little bit concerned having us spending time with the children of Luna Lovegood, but Rolf was Mum's best friend. As such, the four of us grew up best friends. However, once school started, I stopped spending any time with either of them. Regardless, finding a compartment with Lysander in it, all by himself, it seemed like the right place to stop.

I slid open the door and walked in.

"Hi, Lucy," he said, looking up at me and seeming bewildered by my presence.

"Hey, Lysander," I said. "Do you mind if I sit here?"

He stared at me like I'd gone mad.

"Really?" he asked, with his eyebrows furrowed together in ultimate confusion.

"If you don't want me to, I can go away," I said, putting my hand on the door. He shook himself.

"No! No, it's fine. Of course you can sit here," he said. I smiled at him and sat down across from him.

"So, you sit by yourself on the train?" I asked. He was still staring at me like I was some sort of apparition from another world.

"Well, normally I sit with Lorcan, but he's snogging his girlfriend instead," Lysander said. I nodded.

"Makes sense," I said. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. He was still staring at me.

"Why are you here?" he asked finally after about a minute of staring.

I blinked at him in shock. "Just being friendly," I said.

"Yeah, but why are you being friendly to me?" he asked. "I'm a nobody."

I raised my eyebrow at him. "Are you saying I'm somebody?"

That's the most absurd thing I've ever heard. That I, Lucy Weasley, would be counted as a somebody in the grand scheme of schooling.

"Well, yeah," Lysander said. "All of you are."

I blinked at him. "All of who?"

"You, and Roxanne, and Dominique, and Lyra, and Rose, and Emerald, and Dylan, and Albus, and Will, and Sam, and Scorpius, and James, and Fred, and Frank…You lot are the most famous people in school," he said, still staring at me like I was clinically mad.

"We are?" I asked. He nodded.

"You start all the parties in the Tower, you make up most of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, who win every game, you've got all the pretty girls in the year…" he listed. "All of us normal people would kill to be you guys."

If it's possible to be popular without realising it, I think I may have succeeded.

"We're really not enviable," I said. "Trust me."

"I bet you are," Lysander said. "The most interesting thing my brother and I have going on is the fact he's dating a Potter."

"He's dating Lily?" I asked. Lysander nodded.

"What's going on in your group of 'not enviable' people?" he asked.

I shrugged.

"No, go on," he said. "I'm curious. Everyone's bloody curious."

"Well," I started. There's no harm in telling Lysander everything is there? He was always the sweet, harmless one when we were kids. "Rose and Scorpius are having a whore off contest, and have been for the past two years. Will and Fred hate each other because Will dated Roxie, Fred's sister, and then they broke up and Will dated Fred's ex-girlfriend, Em. But the Fred dated Em's sister Lizzie, and now they've all broken up. But before that, everyone though Ly and James were going to be together, but then Ly and Scor's mum died and Ly ended up sleeping with Fred, and he and James have only recently started talking again. Dom, who I'm mostly convinced is in love with Sam, was dating Liam Wood. He finished school two years ago. But they broke it off recently. And then Roxie is dating Sam, who also slept with Ly while drunk. And then Dylan came out at the end of last term and Al went out and got himself a girlfriend the next day. I think it's because he's gay and in love with Dylan but is just too scared to admit it. Then I'm dating Scor…oh dear. I've become part of the Whore War."

It's strange realising you're only going to be a notch on your boyfriend's bedpost.

It's stranger to realise you don't care.

Lysander was staring at me with his jaw somewhere near his navel.

"Holy shit," he said. I nodded.

"It's not fun on the inside," I said. He blinked.

"No, doesn't sound like it," he said. I raised my eyebrow.

"You're lying," I said. "You think it sounds fun. You still want to be part of our madness, don't you?"

"Yeah," he said. "I do. It's so much more interesting."

"And stressful and horrible," I said. I shook my head incredulously.

"You really had no idea that the lot of you are the popular ones?" he asked.

"None," I said.

"Wow," he replied. "Have fun with that." I rolled my eyes.

"I'll talk to you later, Lysander," I said, standing up and opening the door of the compartment.

"Do you mean it?" he asked. I considered for a moment.

"Yes, yes I do," I said. I smiled at him and closed the door behind me.

**Please review. Please? They make me smile. **


	27. 27: Little Lion Man

**A/N: Hey there...erm...yeah. So I haven't updated this story for four months, I think it is. Let's see...November to February...that's four isn't it? Anyways, in my own defence, I just finished my senior year of school early, which took some doing. I took seven classes instead of six. I also had to apply to college, which is never fun. And I've spent the past two weeks since my actual graduation finishing the re-write of my eight hundred page novel. Forgive me for not updating. Oh yeah. And in this stretch of time, I've also directed two plays, both Shakespeare. So I've been really, really busy. But now I have nothing better to do and I'm going to try and finish this damn story. I promise. **

**Anyways - what's going on that you should know...This chapter is the summer between fifth and sixth year (for everyone except James and Fred). At this point, well, actually, the narrator fills you in a bit. If you are completely lost because it's been four months and this story is a complete clusterfuck (I'm aware of that) I recommend reading the previous chapter, since Lucy gives Lysander a breakdown of everything that's happened so far. Yet again, I apologise for not updating at all recently. **

**Carrying on!**

**Chapter 27 - Little Lion Man (Sam)**

I know this is my general impression of life but – I have NO IDEA what is going on with my friends.

They're all clinically insane. I have decided as much and have planned to make a charm that will allow me to discover whether or not this is true.

But as we all stepped out of the lift into the Malfoy's flat, nothing was going properly.

Lucy and Scor, who have been dating for the past three weeks or something like that (I can't keep track) weren't talking to each other. But neither of them seemed particularly fussed by that.

Ly and James, who haven't been speaking to each other for two and a half years, were plotting something on a piece of paper in the corner, with occasional surreptitious glances at the rest of us and then maniacal giggling.

Roxie wasn't looking at me, and we've been together for six months.

Dom was smiling for once, which she hasn't been doing for a very long time, and had her arm linked with Roxie.

Rose was filing her nails. She was the only one doing anything normal.

Fred and Will were staring at Em and Lizzie longingly, seeing as they've both just been dumped. Em and Lizzie were resolutely ignoring both of them.

Dylan and Al were trapped in the other corner and were having an awkward conversation. I couldn't tell what it was about, but Al looked very uncomfortable.

Finally, the lift stopped and everyone tumbled out into the foyer. Mr Malfoy, Mr Zabini and Amy were standing there smiling at us. Even Mr Malfoy was smiling, which was highly unusual.

"Hello, everyone!" Amy said cheerfully.

"Hi," we chorused awkwardly. She cast a sideways look at Mr Malfoy and then smiled awkwardly at us as well. What is going on?

I wish I could make a charm that would allow the caster to see the relationships between people as they currently stand…

"Welcome back," Mr Malfoy said finally, to fill the awkward silence.

I wish I could make a charm that would allow the caster to automatically fill awkward silences…

"We'll just be going upstairs," Scor said decisively, leading the way to the stairs. We all followed him. At the top, Roxie and Dom immediately dove into their bedroom and closed the door. Probably going to talk about girl things that I never understand.

Rose walked into her room and shut the door as well. Lizzie walked into her room too. Al ducked into the room he shares with me and Will and Dylan, and James and Ly and Fred ran into Scor's room, which is where James and Fred stay during the summers.

"So…" Lucy said, looking around at the remainder of us. Dylan, Em, Scor, Will, and I looked at her. "Did anyone think to stash alcohol in the attic last summer or at Christmas?"

"Always," Dylan said, looking scandalised that she even had to ask.

"Great," Scor said. "That's where we should be." The six of us walked up the stairs to the attic and closed the door behind us.

"So, what are we going to do this summer?" I asked, sitting down on a squishy chair.

"In your case, Sam, probably get laid," Scor said, sitting down on a couch.

"Oh, right," I said. I do that, I suppose. I don't usually think about it though.

"Can you believe we're going to be sixth years?" Will asked. He reached under the couch he was sitting on and produced a bottle of Firewhiskey. Em grabbed it from him and took a drink of it. She passed it off to Scor.

He drank some and handed the bottle to me.

"No, I can't believe it," Lucy said. "Scor, can I talk to you?"

"What?" Scor asked, looking up. "Yeah, sure."

They left the attic, leaving me, Dylan, Em, and Will alone.

"We're all single," Will said, looking disturbed by the thought.

"Not true," Em said, ignoring the longing looks that Will was sending in her direction.

I wish I could make a charm that would allow me to understand why people ended relationships…

"It's not?" Will asked, continuing to stare at her.

"Sam and Roxie are still together," Dylan pointed out. "And Alamanda…"

I wish I could make a charm that would tell me why people put certain emphasis on certain words…

Wait. I think that's called understanding inflection. I think that may actually be a normal human thing to do. I wish I understood normality…

"Aren't Lucy and Scor together?" I asked.

Will nodded slowly and clapped me on the shoulder like I was being a fool.

"That's why they went to go talk to each other," he said. "So they could break up."

I blinked. "Really? I thought they were going to have sex."

"Considering my cousin, they may do that as well," Em said. "Where'd Al go?"

"To owl Amanda," Dylan said, looking slightly ill.

"Eurgh," Em said. "She's so…vile."

"Come on, Em," Will said. "You're friends with Rose and related to Scor and you call Amanda vile?"

"Open whorishness with no allusions to something better I can deal with," Em said. "But snakes bother me."

For whatever reason, I don't think she just means personality wise, since Amanda's technically a Hufflepuff.

"So do people who don't get along, right?" Will asked bitterly.

"No, just people who openly try to kill each other," Em said, standing up and storming out of the room.

Will deflated the moment she was gone.

"Why am I such an idiot?" he asked.

"You know if we had Scorpius in here we'd have all of the social lepers of our group present," Dylan grumbled.

Why is everyone in such a bad mood?

"How d'you mean?" Will asked, wrenching the bottle of Firewhiskey out of Dylan's grasp.

"The socially inept," Dylan said, nodding at me. "No offense."

"None taken," I replied, taking the Firewhiskey from Will.

"The arrogant, murderous Quaffle head," Dylan added, nodding at Will.

"Cheers," Will replied.

"The gay guy," Dylan said, grabbing the Firewhiskey from me. "And if we had Scorpius, we'd have the manwhore too."

"Goody," Will replied.

I looked between the two of them, who were both staring darkly off into the middle distance at something I couldn't see.

"How are we all still friends?" I asked.

"Because, mate," Will said. "At this point, no one else would have us."

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Hey, everyone, if you could all come down to breakfast, we have an announcement to make," Dylan's cousin Amy called, knocking on our door very, very early in the morning.

"Fuck off," Will grumbled, sounding as hung over as I felt. Scor and Lucy had never returned to the attic last night, and as such, Will, Dylan and I had just finished off the bottle of Firewhiskey by ourselves.

"Will Corner, don't you take that tone with me," Amy said threateningly.

It's like she can see through doors.

I opened my eyes and realised she was standing in the middle of the room. I screamed.

I was instantly smacked with three pillows.

"Oh Merlin, you're in here," Will said, sitting up and looking dishevelled. "I thought you were outside the door."

Amy crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows at him.

"Sorry, ma'am," he said, staring at his navel.

"Mmhmm,"Amy said. "Alright. Well, as soon as the four of you deem it worthy to join us at breakfast."

"Right, sorry," Will said.

The moment Amy left the four of us managed to drag our sorry selves down the stairs into the dining room. Minty the house elf was serving waffles and fruit salad to the table.

"How was your letter to Amanda?" Dylan asked Al, sounding bitter about it still.

"Fine thanks," Al said, looking uncomfortable and picking at his waffles.

Will and I exchanged looks and then sat down.

Rose, Lucy, and Em were the next to show up. Lucy sat down between me and Will. A long time ago, the three of us were really good friends.

I wish I could make a charm that told me what happened to friendships and why they stopped being friendships…

Em sat down between Dylan and Al, hopefully to keep them from getting into a fight. Rose sat down next to me.

I regarded her suspiciously.

"You're fine, Sam," she said quietly. "I don't sleep with my friends."

"Right," I replied.

"So what happened last night with you and Scor?" Will asked Lucy quietly.

I saw Rose perk up and stare distractedly at the syrup jar. That's weird. I thought she hated Scorpius. And now she's interested in the conversation.

"We've broken up," Lucy replied calmly, drinking some of her coffee.

Ly, Roxie, and Dom walked into the dining room next, with their elbows linked, laughing at something. They sat down at the opposite end of the table, looking exactly like best friends are supposed to.

Scor, James, and Fred appeared last and sat opposite the three of them. Rose was staring at the back of Scor's head, but I don't think anyone else noticed.

Right as we all tucked into breakfast, Mr Malfoy, Amy and Mr Zabini walked in. Mr Zabini sat down at one end of the table. Lizzie appeared shortly thereafter and sat down next to him. Fred watched her walk in with a look of longing in his eye. Will watched Fred watch Lizzie and looked like he'd just had an idea. That can't be good.

"Everybody," Amy said loudly from the opposite end of the table. We all turned in our seats and watched her.

"We have an announcement," Mr Malfoy continued.

"You're kicking us all out because you've had enough and we're more trouble than we're worth?" Ly suggested.

Mr Malfoy laughed good-naturedly.

"Not quite," he said. "Erm…" He looked down at something, and I noticed for the first time that he was holding Amy's hand.

This should be clicking somewhere in my brain, but it's not.

"We've decided to get married," Mr Malfoy said.

There was a moment of silence before all the girls started exclaiming excitedly.

I wish I could make a charm to explain girl gibberish…

Then all the guys started wishing them congratulations, except for Scorpius, who stood up and walked out of the room without a word.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"And they're going to be married and we're really going to be a family for real and it'll be grand," Dylan slurred, his arm around Ly.

"I know!" she slurred back. "Anyone seen my idiot brother?"

"Not since breakfast," James replied. "I think he didn't take so well to the idea of your dad getting remarried after your mum…"

"Oh yeah," Ly said.

"Sam, can I talk to you?" Roxie whispered in my ear.

I jumped.

"What?" I asked.

"You. Me. Talking," she said.

Lucy took Scorpius away to "talk" last night. And now they're not dating anymore.

Oh dear. She's going to ditch me, isn't she?

"Yeah, sure," I said.

As we left the attic for the roof, I made awkward eye contact with Dom. She smiled at me and then went back to whatever she was talking about with Lucy.

At the roof, Roxie let go of my hand.

"So," she said. "I was thinking that maybe we should, erm, see other people."

"You're breaking up with me," I said.

She nodded apologetically.

"May I ask why?" I asked.

She bit her lip. "Because friends are forever, and Hogwarts relationships are just temporary," she said.

Is that an actual answer?

"One day this will all make sense," she said. "It just doesn't right now."

"You could explain it," I said.

She smiled sadly at me. "No, I can't, Sam," she said. "Because I refuse to have as convoluted a love life as my brother."

I felt a look of confusion spread across my face.

"Just…don't worry about it," she recommended. "And come on. We do have a party to attend."

"We always have a party to attend," I pointed out.

It should bother me that she just broke up with me.

We walked back down the stairs to the attic. Roxie put her hand on Dom's shoulder when she walked in and then sat down next to her. She muttered something in her ear. Dom turned around quickly and glanced at me. As she turned back around, she beamed.

I blinked in confusion.

There is more going on here than I understand.

**Review please! Even though I don't deserve reviews at this point...**

**Chapter title from Mumford and Sons "Little Lion Man" - It was not your fault but mine. It was your heart on the line. I really fucked it up this time, didn't I my dear? **


	28. 28: Dirty Little Secret

**A/N: OMFG. Two chapters in one day? No way! I am back! Sorry for the four month delay. Again.**

**Chapter 28 - Dirty Little Secret (Rose)**

We got back to Hogwarts with little incident. Besides the fact that now everyone in our group except for Al is single. Funny that, because when we were kids, I always thought he was going to turn out to be gay.

I just wish there was some way I could get my friends back without telling them the truth. Because at this point, the truth would completely destroy everything I've been working so hard to do.

The appearance part was easiest to do, hands down. But the reputation was harder to build. Of course, now that I've got it, I can lie all I want and no one will think it's anything but the truth.

Cheap, heartless tart? One life I never thought I'd be living.

Fortunately, I don't actually have to.

"Can we please just have sex now?" the seventh year Hufflepuff I was currently engaged in snogging asked.

I pretended to think about it.

"Well, under normal circumstances, I'd say yes," I lied. "But it's that time of month, if you understand me."

"Fuck," he replied, looking severely disappointed. "But my friends already know we were coming up here to have sex."

"I'll tell you what," I said. "You can tell your friends we had sex anyway. I don't mind."

"Really?" he asked. "Because they've all been giving me shit for being a virgin as a seventh year."

I smiled at him and put my hand on his cheek. "Well, you can tell them you slept with Rose Weasley," I said. "And they'll believe you."

"Thank you," he said, looking genuinely grateful.

"Sure," I said.

I wasn't lying when I told Scorpius that a full score of men would swear to sleeping with me.

I was just lying when I said I'd actually slept with them.

I've only actually slept with three boys. Ever.

But no one would believe me at this point. As long as Scorpius keeps believing that I'm beating him at this stupid game and he keeps sleeping with girls, eventually, he's going to get some sort of disease or he's going to get someone pregnant and then I'll never have to deal with him again.

It's not like I'm actually stupid enough to sleep with twenty men. And it's not like I'd ever actually stoop to his level.

But I don't have anyone to talk to. At all.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Ly, can you keep a secret?" I asked, halfway through November. We were sitting on a balcony during a party in the Tower. Gryffindor had just beaten Ravenclaw in Quidditch.

"Sure," she said. "I'm not Sam. I can actually lie."

"So can I," I grumbled, taking a drink of the alcoholic beverage I'd procured from Dylan before escaping to the balcony.

"Shouldn't you be down there, I dunno, shagging someone?" Ly asked.

I nodded slowly.

"I don't actually sleep with them," I said. "Any of them pretty much. I've slept with three people. Ever."

Ly choked on her own drink and stared at me with wide eyes.

"What the fuck?" she demanded. "You just let people say you're a whore because…"

"Because it makes your brother actually try to be," I said, becoming thoroughly more ashamed of myself.

"Holy shit," Ly replied, staring at me with her jaw hanging towards the ground. "Scor thinks you've slept with twenty three people."

"I figure out how many he's actually slept with and then I pretend to sleep with a few more people," I said. "You can't tell anyone this."

She stared at me, still slack jawed. "But…but Lucy hates you! She wouldn't hate you if she knew you didn't actually sleep with her sister's boyfriend!"

I nodded slowly again. "The only problem with that is that I did actually sleep with her sister's boyfriend," I said, staring at my drink and then finishing it off.

Ly frowned at me. "Why?"

"Because he was a dick," I said. "He spent the first three nights he was there trying to seduce, in turn, Lily and Victoire and then me. So I slept with him and he got run out of the house on a rail."

Ly stared at me. "Which other ones did you sleep with?"

"I did actually sleep with Ioan," I said. "And I did sleep with Tommy Townsend."

"But none of the others," Ly said incredulously.

"Not a single damn one," I said.

"Holy shit," Ly repeated, looking out over the Tower. "You know Scor has actually slept with nineteen girls or something, right?"

"I know," I said. "But the difference is he has real issues. I'm just pissed off."

"Holy shit," Ly said again, drinking more of her drink.

"Please don't tell anyone," I said.

She shook her head at me in disbelief.

"Yeah, okay," she said finally. "Holy shit…"

I nodded and looked out across the crowds again.

From what I could see, Sam and Dom were dancing together for the first time in a long time. They always used to dance together at parties, but then they stopped, mostly when Dom was dating Liam Wood and Sam was dating Roxie.

James and Fred were in the centre of the mosh pit, where they always should have been. Will was dancing on the fray of the pit with Lizzie. That can't mean anything good.

Roxie, to my surprise, was dancing with Frank Longbottom. Lucy was sitting a few balconies over, talking to Lysander Scamander.

Alamanda were making out in a dark corner. Scorpius was sucking on some girl's neck.

"Erm, Rose," Ly said, pointing towards the door of the Tower.

I looked where she was pointing. My jaw dropped almost comically.

"Oh, fuck," I said. Ly nodded in agreement.

"That's not good," Ly said. Instead of staring at the door, she turned and glanced at the dark corner that Alamanda was occupying. I looked as well. Al's eyes were open and he was watching the door with the same horrified expression Ly and I were wearing.

I glanced back at the door in time to see my idiot little brother kiss Dylan and then close the door behind them.

"Hugo…and Dylan…" I said slowly. "My fucking brother and your fucking step-brother."

Ly was shaking her head slowly. "That's not how that is supposed to go."

"How is it supposed to go?" I asked.

"It's supposed to be my fucking step-brother and your fucking cousin," she explained, nodding back at the dark corner where Al was still staring at the now closed door.

"This is really not good," I said.

There was a squeak and a bang and Ly turned pale.

"It just got worse," she muttered, staring wide eyed at the door.

Professor Longbottom was standing in the doorway, flanked by Professor MacMillan and Professor Spinet.

"Fuck," I muttered.

The music died and everyone in the room turned and stared at the three teachers in mute horror.

"Hey there, Dad," Frank said from the floor, looking like he might die at any moment.

Professor Spinet looked at the engraving over the door that said "Teddy Lupin, Victoire Weasley, Jake Wood."

She turned to face the room at large. "If your last name is Wood, Lupin, Weasley or Potter, you will be staying here. Everyone else, get out."

In blind panic, the majority of the people in the room ran for the door and disappeared into the corridor.

"Sorry, Rose," Ly said, standing up and running as well. I nodded and walked down the stairs. Eventually, it was down to me, Lucy, Roxie, Fred, James, Al, Lily, Dom, Louis, and Kelly Wood, the third year who'd been made Seeker.

"We're missing a Weasley," Professor Longbottom said.

"He's busy," Al said darkly. He grumbled and called Hugo impolite names under his breath.

"I realise that those are not your names," Professor Spinet said, "but they are your family's names."

"Okay, so?" Kelly Wood asked.

"And this party is breaking almost every single school rule if I had to guess," Professor Longbottom said. "For the love of Merlin. The lot of you are Gryffindors!"

"That wasn't synonymous with party animal alcoholic in your day?" Lucy asked.

Professor Longbottom gave her a death glare and she fell silent.

"At least we had the decorum to throw our Quidditch parties in our own common room," Professor Spinet said quietly.

"Yeah, but Professor Spinet, if we did that, we wouldn't be able to invite people from other houses," Dom said.

"How many houses were in representation here?" Professor MacMillan asked, looking aghast.

"All of them," I said. "Always."

"There were no Hufflepuffs here," Professor MacMillan said. "My house would never."

"There were Hufflepuffs," Louis said.

"Besides," Roxie said. "It's not like anyone can get in unless they're a third year or they have an invitation."

"What about you lot?" Professor Spinet asked, putting her hands on her hips and glaring at us.

"Well, we're different," James said.

"Yeah, we're the only people who can issue the invitations," Louis said.

As one, we shot him a look that told him to shut the fuck up.

"And why is that, Mr Weasley?" Professor Longbottom asked, sounding dangerous.

"Because you have to be a Weasley, a Lupin, or a Wood," Louis said nervously. "Besides! It's not like we even throw the parties! They just happen!"

Everyone except Lily, Louis, and Kelly Wood cringed in horror.

"Alright then," Professor Longbottom said. "Who does throw the parties?"

James, Fred, Al, Roxie, Dom, Lucy and I stared at our feet.

"You lot?" he asked. He did a quick headcount. "And the rest of your cadre of lunatics?"

"We've essentially had complete control of the Tower since third year…" James admitted.

"Alicia, Ernie, I don't actually need the two of you," Professor Longbottom said. "I do, however, need Will Corner, Sam Baker, Dylan Abernathy, Emerald Zabini, Lyra and Scorpius Malfoy, and my son."

"Okay," Professor Spinet said, heading for the door.

"Kelly, Louis, Lily, the three of you can feel free to leave," Professor Longbottom said. "But if I catch you drinking on school grounds again there will be hell to pay."

"Yes, sir," the three of them mumbled before they ran.

"Dylan's busy," Al said, sounding angry.

"Same sort of busy as Hugo?" Professor Longbottom asked, looking pissed off.

"Precisely the same, actually," Lucy replied.

Professor Longbottom processed this information for a moment and then seemed to realise what we were talking about.

"Of course," he said, glaring at the wall.

Professor MacMillan looked concerned at the door, as did Professor Spinet.

"Do I really have to get Will Corner?" Professor Spinet asked.

"Yes," Professor Longbottom said.

"And Sam Baker?" Professor MacMillan asked.

"I don't care if they're your favourite students, go get them, because they are in loads of trouble," Professor Longbottom said.

The other two dashed off to get the rest of our friends.

"So how much alcohol is consumed at these parties?" Professor Longbottom asked.

"Depends on who you are," Fred said quietly, scuffing his toe on the ground.

"What about drugs?" Professor Longbottom asked.

"Nothing that doesn't come out of your son's garden," Roxie said.

Professor Longbottom closed his eyes in apparent distress.

As if to help his own incrimination, Frank arrived at that moment wearing a shirt that said, "Herbology: Bringing You Magical Mushrooms Since 3500 BC."

"Hey, Dad," he said, looking guilty and taking his place next to James and Fred.

Ly and Em walked in next. Ly walked over to Dom and Roxie. Em stood next to Lucy.

Scorpius sauntered in looking disinterested and leaned against the wall. Will and Sam were last, since Dylan wasn't going to be joining us.

They stood guiltily at the back and hung their heads.

Professor Longbottom regarded all of us with a look of disbelief and disappointment in his eyes.

"What do you all want to do when you finish school?" he asked. "I realise you all had to discuss this last year before OWLs, but I'm curious."

"Go pro," Dom said, addressing her feet.

"Be a singer," Roxie mumbled.

"Be a Healer," Al said.

"Go pro," Ly, James, and Fred said in unison.

"With Quidditch?" Dom asked, looking curious.

"No," they said in unison again. "The WWW."

Dom nodded and looked back at her feet.

"Figured I'd do something useful with Transfiguration," Will said.

"Something with Charms," Sam said.

"Open a sweets shop," Lucy said.

"Open a night club," I said, smiling sinisterly at no one in particular.

"Journalist," Scorpius replied.

"Something with the public service," Em said.

"Not teach Herbology," Frank said.

Professor Longbottom glared at Frank for a second then looked at all of us.

"And how does throwing wild parties in the 'Tower' help you achieve those goals?" he asked.

"I don't have goals," Frank said.

"Well, considering I want to run one of these things," I said. "It helps me practice for my future career."

"What about the rest of you?" Professor Longbottom asked, glaring around at all of them. "Because right now, your detention sentences aren't looking friendly."

I think I know how I can get my friends back.

"They don't throw the parties, Professor Longbottom," I said. "I do."

Everyone turned and stared at me until I gave them a pointed, "I'm trying to save all your asses" look.

"Really?" Professor Longbottom asked.

"Really," I said. "It's a test run for the managerial side of running a club. How to best supply the drinks, best wire the music, best layout for the actual club itself. Since recently finished Hogwarts students are going to be my target clientele, I figured there was no better way to test it out."

I really have become a very adept liar, haven't I?

Although now that I'm saying it, running a night club would actually be quite fun.

Professor Longbottom spluttered at me.

"You have detention until the end of term," he said finally.

I nodded.

"Go back to your dorms. All of you," he said.

We didn't need telling twice.

"Thank you," Roxie said the moment the five of us were back in our dormitory.

"Yeah," I said. "Sure. I only ever meant to be a heartless bitch to Scorpius. Not any of you."

"Because that worked," Lucy said, glaring at me.

Ly opened her mouth like she was going to say something, but I quelled her with a single glance.

"I figured I'd at least try to redeem myself," I said.

"Try all you like," Lucy replied.

"Well, we appreciate it," Dom said.

"You're welcome," I said, falling into my own bed.

I should probably stop lying. Sometime soon. Or at least start living some of my lies. Like the night club one. I actually like this idea. A lot.

**Review!**

**Chapter title - "Dirty Little Secret" by the All-American Rejects. For fairly self explanatory reasons.**


	29. 29: A Party Song The Walk of Shame

**A/N: Okay. Three chapters in one day. I think this has to make up somewhat for not updating in four months. I wrote them all today too. If there's anyone still reading this story, thank you.**

**Chapter 29 - A Party Song (The Walk of Shame) - (Al)  
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I fumed for about a month. Straight.

I thought Amanda was going to chuck me for sure, just for the glares I gave everyone. Although, if she had chucked me, it would've made everything a whole hell of a lot easier.

I sat down at breakfast the day before the Christmas holidays in a generally foul mood.

"Al," Lucy said, putting her hand on my shoulder. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

I snarled and drank my coffee.

"Good answer," she said icily, turning back to whatever she was doing.

It was all going fine. Everything was just fucking perfect. But no. He had to go and ruin everything.

"Al," Fred said, his nails digging into my shoulder. "Let's talk."

"About what?" I asked grumpily.

"It's not a public conversation," he said, dragging me out of the Great Hall.

I crossed my arms and glared at him.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Okay, first of all, I have done nothing to you," he said. "Stop glaring at me."

"Sorry," I said. "It's not directed at you. It's just my general mood."

"Yeah, jealousy doesn't end well," he said. "Trust me."

"Oh yeah? What did you ever do because you were jealous? And how do you even think I'm jealous? Of what?" I demanded.

"Al," he said. "Are you at all aware of why James and I didn't talk to each other for two years?"

I scuffed my toe on the floor.

"James always got everything, right?" he asked. "Girls, popularity…"

"You don't have to tell me that," I said. "I'm his brother."

"I was so jealous of everything he had," Fred said. "And as a twisted result, I ended up sleeping with Ly."

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked.

"Jealousy fucks you up," he said. "Either get over it, or do something about it."

"I'm not jealous of anyone," I said without conviction.

Fred gave me a look so disturbingly reminiscent of our grandmother that I shuddered.

"It doesn't do any good to lie to your family," he said.

"My fucking family is the fucking problem!" I exclaimed, before I slapped my hand over my mouth. "I didn't say that."

Fred raised his eyebrow at me. "Sure you didn't."

"Fuck you," I replied.

"No," he said. "That's incest. That's weird."

I glared at him. "Because your love life is so much better."

Fred's turn to glare.

"The fuck head asked her out just to piss me off," Fred said. I raised my eyebrow. "And she said yes, just to piss Em off."

Will dating Lizzie was confusing to everyone, except, apparently, for Fred, who was merely angry about it.

"You know that whole thing you were saying about jealousy?" I asked. "Follow your own damn advice."

Fred rolled his eyes at me and went back into breakfast.

And he's got it backwards. Will and Lizzie were dating to piss him and Em off, that much was true. However, Will was doing to make Em jealous enough to want him back, and Lizzie was doing it to make Fred fight for her instead of her sister.

I growled at the universe and went back to get my own food.

I glanced down the table and saw Hugo and Dylan eating breakfast together.

I hate him.

Before I could do something stupid, like throw things, Amanda appeared out of nowhere and stuck her tongue down my throat.

"Hey," I said, sounding bitter. We've never really had a real conversation. We've been together for over a year now and we've never really had a conversation. Just because at that stupid party in fifth year, Dylan grabbed the stupid microphone and came out of the closet and I grabbed Amanda. And then I grabbed a whole hell of a lot more alcohol than I had been drinking up until that point.

By this point, I'm usually somewhat sozzled.

But that's because when I'm sober, I'm like this.

"So, party organiser," Dom said, sitting down across from us and turning to look at Rose.

"Yes?" Rose asked.

"Party tonight in celebration of the Christmas holidays?" Dom asked.

"Of course," Rose said. "My detention's finished today."

I don't know why she took the fall for us when we got caught in November. But I've never been more grateful to have her as a cousin or friend.

"Hear that, Al?" Amanda said enthusiastically. "A party!"

"Great," I replied. "A party."

OOooOOooOOooOO

By nine o'clock I was almost entirely wasted.

And I was pretty sure I'd been spiked by Frank as well. The long and short of it was that everything that had previously seemed like a very bad idea was starting to look like a very good one. I wasn't sure if it was because of drugs or just alcohol.

The first part of the evening, I spent dancing with Amanda in the middle of the Tower.

"We should go back to my dorm," she whispered in my ear.

"Erm…" I said, stalling. It's not like we haven't been having sex for the past year, but right now it doesn't seem like a particularly appealing course of action.

I can see that Amanda is relatively attractive. She's got California blonde hair, and nice brown eyes. But…the fact she has nothing between her ears is a little off-putting at times.

Because my brain is disturbed or something, a vision of a possible future went through my head.

Me, Amanda, two cookie cutter perfect children, sitting at a dining table in a nice house in London, only a few blocks from where I'd be working at St Mungo's. Entertaining dinner guests, maybe a fellow doctor and his wife. I'd actually be an alcoholic. For real. Everything would be picture perfect and therein a total lie.

I don't want it.

"Al?" Amanda asked, pressing herself against me.

"Erm…" I repeated, watching the door to the Tower. As I watched, an obviously drunk and unusually alone Dylan walked out the door, presumably on his way back to the dorms. "You know, Amanda, I'm so piss drunk right now that I think I'm just going to go pass out."

"Okay," she said, kissing me. "Do you want me to walk you back to your dorm?"

"No, it's fine," I said, disentangling myself from her and making my way to the door.

The corridor was empty.

I staggered back to the Gryffindor common room with resentment building in place of the jealousy Fred had called me on earlier.

Apparently, I stagger faster than Dylan does, because I climbed through the portrait hole only seconds after he did.

"Hey!" I said sharply.

He turned around, looking confused, and swayed on his feet.

Before I could stop myself, I'd punched him in the face.

He fell over holding his now broken nose. "What the fuck?" he demanded. "Mother fucker!" He tried to clamber back to his feet. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you?"

"You know, if you'd just stayed straight we wouldn't be here right now!" I yelled. I was fairly confident that the entire house was in the Tower.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" he demanded. "Stayed straight? I was never straight! I never claimed to be straight! Where are we exactly that's so bad?"

"If you'd just stayed in the fucking closet then-" I yelled, wishing that Frank hadn't put whatever he had in my drink. I would not have been saying any of this if he hadn't.

"Then what?" Dylan asked, finally managing to get up off the floor. His nose was bleeding somewhat profusely and also happened to be crooked.

"Then we wouldn't be in this mess!" I yelled.

"What mess?" Dylan yelled right back. "We weren't in a mess until you came in here and hit me!"

"If you'd just stayed an illusion we'd have been fine!" I exclaimed.

What am I saying? Why, brain, why?

"What the fuck is wrong with your brain?" Dylan demanded. "What illusion? Are you trying to say I suddenly materialised out of nowhere?"

I am a Grade AAA moron.

"If you'd just stayed unavailable-" I hollered, trying to hit him again. He ducked.

"Unavailable?" he asked. We paused in our yelling and regarded each other. Then I saw something click in his eyes. "Unavailable," he repeated, nodding like he was about to blow a fuse. "You're the fuck head who got a fucking girlfriend!" he yelled, taking a swing at me.

I didn't manage to duck in time. That will definitely be a black eye tomorrow.

"You're the fuck head who's fucking my cousin!" I yelled back.

We seethed at each other for about ten seconds, both of us breathing harder than normal.

Without warning or premeditated thought, I grabbed him and kissed him. He grabbed me by the hair and kissed me back with no apparent intention of stopping any time soon.

His lips tasted like blood, which I realised was my own damn fault.

We staggered backwards towards the stairs to the dormitory rooms and managed to make it into the room without breaking our kiss. I wasn't really that big on kissing with Amanda. Probably because she's a girl.

I really like kissing Dylan.

I kicked the dormitory door closed and grabbed the bottom of his shirt, pulling it violently over his head. Why couldn't he have had the sense to wear a button down shirt? We wouldn't have had to break apart to remove it if he had.

We sprang back together like magnets once his shirt was gone.

Brain, whatever was wrong with you earlier that I was complaining about, I take it back.

His hands left my neck and unbuttoned my shirt, since I actually had the good sense to wear a button down.

We fell backwards onto his bed since it was closest.

"I'm sorry about your nose," I said against his lips while my hands occupied themselves with touching as much of his chest as they could.

"I don't care," he said, his own hands undoing my jeans.

I need to make a mental note to thank Frank for whatever the hell it was he put in my drink.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I woke up the first time when a flash went off in my face. I fell back asleep almost instantly.

I woke up again to muttering.

"More concerned about Dylan's nose or Al's eye?"

"Neither injury is particularly worrying, but I'm quite curious how they acquired them."

"Are you really sure you want to know?"

"Ooh, good point."

"You ever broken somebody's nose during sex?"

"No…I can imagine where he'd get the black eye though."

I blinked and stifled a yawn before I finally was able to focus on the three people talking about us. Scorpius, Will, and Sam were standing in the centre of the dormitory with their arms crossed, looking amused.

"What do you lot want?" I asked, realising I could only hear out of my left ear, since the right was stuck to Dylan's chest, as was the entire right side of my face.

"We've got a bet placed on how you two came by those injuries," Scorpius said, looking highly amused by our situation.

"You'll never guess," Dylan mumbled, alerting me to the fact he was awake.

"Oh, we've got several ideas," Will said, looking as amused as Scorpius.

"Yeah, but you'll never guess because they weren't acquired in this bed," I said, closing my eyes again.

I could practically hear the confusion on their faces.

"We got in a fist fight if you really want to know," Dylan said.

"Oh," the three of them said in unison.

"We also thought we should probably remind both of you that by your sheer nakedness while in the same bed you're cheating on people," Scorpius said.

"Really," Dylan asked, sounding entirely disinterested. "I'd completely forgot."

I laughed. I probably shouldn't.

"And we also thought we should tell you the entire school knows you've slept together," Will said.

"What?" I asked, opening my eyes and sitting up.

"That's nice," Dylan said, rolling onto his side. "I'm going back to sleep."

"Easy for you to say," I said. "You're already out."

He sighed in mild irritation and sat up as well. "Why does the entire school know?"

"Because your boyfriend came looking for you this morning," Scorpius said, looking slightly vindictive.

"Hugo's not my boyfriend," Dylan said tiredly.

"Be that as it may, he acquired some photographic evidence," Will said, looking apologetic and hitting Scorpius in the shoulder. Scor looked away grumpily. "That he shared with…Amanda…"

My eyes widened.

"Photographic evidence?" I asked nervously.

"Photo-_very_-graphic," Sam supplied unhelpfully. Will and Scor hit him upside the head together.

"Oh Merlin's balls," I said.

"Yours, actually," Scor replied.

"Go away," I said. "Before I hex you."

"Yeah, sure," Scor said, ducking out the dormitory door.

"It's just the walk of shame," Dylan said comfortingly.

"Yeah, congratulations. You not only cheated on your girlfriend, you cheated on her with your male best friend," I said. I threw off the blankets and started looking for my clothes.

Will and Sam had their eyes covered the moment I stood up.

"Al," Dylan said, sounding confused as I pulled on my pants. I ignored him and put on my jeans and found a clean shirt from my trunk. I started for the door. "Al."

I slammed the door shut behind me.

**Review!**

**Chapter title - "A Party Song (The Walk of Shame)" by All Time Low: Let's drink to feelings of temptation, you and I were an overnight sensation.**


	30. 30: Love Like Winter

**A/N: Okay. Four chapters. One day. I could use some reviews for my effort now that I've sufficiently apologised. Please? (Thank you Bill the Door for actually reviewing). Even if it's hate mail.**

**Chapter 30 - Love Like Winter (Dylan)**

I stormed down to breakfast with a very bad attitude towards the world.

The minute I walked into the Great Hall, I could hear most of the muttering stop. As I've spent most of my life wishing to be a photojournalist, I know that a picture's worth a thousand words, but all I was getting was silence.

However, being part of the most talked about group of people in all of Hogwarts tends to leave one immune to things like accusing stares and dropped jaws.

I sat down at the former Gryffindor table across from Ly, James, Fred, and Frank. A group of first year Ravenclaws were sitting slightly down the table staring at me.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" I asked them.

They tittered to themselves and scampered away.

I seethed.

After Al ran out of the dorms, I couldn't find him anywhere.

He's probably hiding from Amanda.

Ly, James, Frank, and Fred were all staring at me with identically raised eyebrows.

"Don't even start with me," I said, pointing at them.

"Okay," James and Frank said, staring at their breakfasts instead.

"Anyone seen Hugo?" I asked grouchily.

Ly nodded down the table. Hugo was sitting with a group of his friends. I sighed and stood up, walking down the table until I reached him. I sat down.

"Sorry," I said.

He shrugged. "Let's be honest," he said. "It was just sex between us. Amanda might kill you though."

"Yeah, about that," I said. "Can I have my camera back?"

"Yeah," he said, handing it over.

"Thanks," I said, standing back up and walking back over to Ly. I sat back down.

"So…" Ly said. "Erm…what happened exactly?"

"I think we were both very drunk," I said. "And then we got in a fight. And then we shagged, and now I have no idea where he's gone."

"That sucks," Ly said.

"This may be partially my fault," Fred said.

The four of us turned and stared at him in utter confusion.

"How do you figure?" I asked.

"Because yesterday I told him he should either get over his jealousy or do something about it," Fred said.

"What jealousy?" I asked.

"He's been fuming about you sleeping with Hugo for…for as long as you've been sleeping with Hugo," Ly explained.

My eyebrows hit my hairline.

"And now he's gone and evaporated," I said.

"Well, on the bright side, you know for a fact he's going to be on the train," Ly said.

"Yeah," I said bitterly. "Along with every other person in the school who knows we shagged. Thank you, Amanda."

"Do your parents know their children are all fucked?" Frank asked James curiously.

"Define 'fucked,'" James replied.

"Both metaphorically and literally," Frank said.

"How are we metaphorically fucked?" James asked. "And I'm pretty sure they know Al and I have got laid. Not sure they know about Lily."

Ly stared down at her breakfast at the mention of James shagging someone. I raised my eyebrow at her.

She pretended not to see me.

"Because, I mean, you're you," Frank said. "And then Al's sexuality is questionable-"

"There's nothing questionable about being gay," I interjected.

"Not what I meant," Frank replied. "And the way Al does it, yeah, there is."

I glared at the table darkly.

"You know we should probably head to the train," James said, standing up.

"Yeah," Ly agreed, standing as well.

The five of us grabbed our holiday bags and headed down to the carriages.

I grumbled at the universe as we sat down.

When we got on the train, Ly and I found Scor, Em and Lizzie and shared a compartment with them. Em wasn't talking to Lizzie, since Lizzie is still dating Will.

We were halfway to London when I happened to glance outside the compartment. A gaggle of giggling Hufflepuff girls were staring at me.

I groaned impatiently and stood up, slamming open the door to the compartment. They recoiled. I'm not particularly tall, or particularly imposing as far as I can tell, so I don't know why they were freaking out.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

"Did you really shag Al Potter?" one of the girls asked.

"Yeah, I did," I said crossly. "Any other questions?"

They looked mildly ashamed of themselves and started lurking off to somewhere else. A few of them didn't bugger off though, and kept staring at me.

"What?" I asked.

One of them bit her lip and batted her eyelashes at me. "Would you maybe…shag me?" she asked.

I stared at her incredulously.

"I'm gay," I said. "Why would I – no. Just…no."

She looked disappointed and she and her friends walked off down the corridor.

I sat back down in the compartment and closed the door.

The four people I was sharing the compartment with were staring at me.

"I just got propositioned by a fourth year," I said. "A fourth year girl. Anyone care to explain?"

"You haven't seen the picture Hugo took, have you?" Em asked, looking mildly pained.

"No I haven't," I said. "Although, I appear to be the only one."

"Yeah…" Lizzie said.

"Remember when Sam said it was 'photo-_very_-graphic' evidence?" Scor asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Since it's my line."

He nodded. "He wasn't kidding," Scor said.

I regarded him suspiciously. "And you said Al's nuts were visible," I reminded him. "You said nothing about me."

"You didn't ask," Scor said, holding out his hand in Lizzie's direction.

She raised her eyebrow at him. He just stared. Finally, she rolled her eyes and turned mildly pink before pulling out a photograph. Ly, Em, and I gave her disapproving stares.

Scor took the picture and handed it to me.

My eyes went wide and my jaw dropped.

"Fuck," I said after a pause.

"Yeah," Ly agreed.

I calmly folded the picture in half and shredded it.

"No one was going to bother to tell me that the entire school, in addition to knowing I fucked Al, also has seen me completely naked?" I demanded.

"At least you've got nothing to be ashamed of," Ly said, looking apologetic.

"Hooray, the entire school has seen my junk. Good thing I've hit puberty," I growled.

"It could've been worse," Scor said.

"How?" I asked, staring at him.

He thought about it for a second. "You could've had a hard on."

"You are not helpful," I replied.

"Generally no," he said.

"Go away," I said.

"Right," he said, standing up and walking out of the compartment.

I hate my fucking life.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"So, how was term?" Amy asked when we walked into the flat.

"No," I said, storming into the kitchen and grabbing a cookie.

"Erm…" she said, starting to follow me.

"I wouldn't," Ly recommended.

"Why not?" Amy asked.

"He's had a bad day or two," Em explained.

Yeah, you could say that. First the bastard breaks my nose, then he kisses me, then we shag, then he abandons ship. What even is that?

OOooOOooOOooOO

I was still seething two weeks later when we got on the train to go back to school. I'd managed to build up my feelings towards Al and distil them into pure anger.

That anger was not dispelled when I was dragged into a compartment and snogged. The mysterious snogger either didn't know me that well, or failed to remember my left handedness, because he was holding my right shoulder. As such, I was more than able to haul off and deck him.

The person who recoiled holding his right eye glared at me reproachfully with the green left one.

"That just healed," Al said, sounding bitter.

"Fuck you," I replied. I turned around and was going to walk out of the compartment but the same fourth year Hufflepuff girl who'd propositioned me before the holidays was standing there staring at us. I rolled my eyes and opened the compartment door.

"Whatever it is, no," I said. I slammed the door and drew the blinds before I fell into one of the compartment seats with my head between my knees. I heard Al sit down across from me.

"Who was that?" he asked cautiously, probably wondering if I was going to hit him again.

"The fucking fourth year who asked me to sleep with her," I replied.

"Oh," Al said. "Remember when we were best friends?"

"Remember when I wasn't out, you didn't have a girlfriend, we hadn't slept together, and a picture of us naked hadn't gone around the entire school?" I retorted, still not pulling my head out from between my knees.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"For which part?" I asked, finally looking up at him.

"Everything," he said, looking guilty.

I sneered at him and put my head back down. I've been spending too much time with Scorpius.

"Well," he said. "Almost everything."

"Oh yeah?" I asked. "Which part aren't you sorry for? Breaking my face?"

"Would you look at me?" he demanded, sounding slightly pissed.

"No," I replied.

"Well, that's not the part I'm not sorry for," he said grumpily.

"And which part is?" I asked.

He didn't answer.

I rolled my eyes and looked up at him. "Which part aren't you sorry for?"

"I'm not sorry that we slept together," he said.

"Really," I said disbelievingly. "Then why did you disappear?"

"Because I was breaking it off with Amanda," he said, glancing at me reproachfully. "What crawled up your ass and died?"

There was an awkward pause while we regarded each other and considered his words.

"I could've picked a better cliché," he said finally.

I snorted a laugh and put my head back between my knees.

"Are – are you okay?" he asked.

I looked up again. "No," I said. "No, I'm not."

"Mostly my fault?" he asked, looking sheepish.

"Yeah," I said. "Yeah, not mostly. _Entirely _your fault."

He nodded. "I'm sorry," he said again.

"Yeah," I replied. "You should be. You fuck with my head."

"I do?" he asked. I rolled my eyes.

"And clearly I mess you up," I said.

"What makes you say that?" he asked, looking anywhere but me.

"Let's examine the facts, shall we?" I replied. "I come out of the closet, the very next morning, you won't talk to me and you've got a girlfriend. If that doesn't scream 'scared to be gay' I don't know what does."

He sheepishly chewed on his nails.

"Then, you accuse me of fucking everything up," I continued. "By coming out and not staying 'unavailable.'"

He cringed.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Are you sorry we shagged?"

I rolled my eyes and held the bridge of my nose to dispel the migraine he was giving me.

"Al," I said tiredly. "I've wanted to crawl into bed with you since fourth year. I'm just regretting the aftermath."

I stood up and stormed out of the compartment, making sure to slam the door.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Happy birthday, Rose," I said two weeks later. I hadn't spoken to Al since the train.

"Thanks, Dylan," she said.

"Good luck with your night club," I added, melting into the crowd. Even though I hadn't been present during the Tower bust before the holidays, Will and Sam had filled me in on how Rose had got the rest of us out of detention.

I'd like her more if she hadn't turned into such a whore.

"Hey, Dylan," said a high pitched and irritating voice from behind me.

I groaned in irritation and turned to face Amanda. She slapped me.

"Thanks," I said, turning back around and heading for the alcohol.

"I'm not done with you," she said, grabbing my arm.

I stared her down with a pained expression.

"Haven't you got your revenge already?" I asked. "You gave the entire school a picture of me naked. Doesn't that fulfil your need for retribution?"

She looked grumpily at me and stuck her bottom lip out in a pout.

"Al said you were better in bed than me," she said, crossing her arms at me. "And it's not true."

I almost laughed. "To him, it probably is," I said.

"Why?" she asked.

"Because I'm better hung than you," I replied, smiling sinisterly at her.

Holy shit, I really have to stop talking to Scorpius.

"I'm a girl," she said indignantly.

"Thus my point," I replied. I turned and started heading back for the Firewhiskey.

"He's not gay!" she called after me.

I stopped walking and turned around to say something back to her, but microphone feedback filled the room.

Amanda and I both turned to face the source of the disturbance that happened to be Al, standing on one of the balconies, with a microphone.

Oh for the love of Merlin.

"Hi, everyone," he said, waving jovially at the room. I haven't seen him look jovial since before he started dating Amanda. "Hello. Happy evening. Happy birthday, Rosie."

Titters were starting up in the crowd while people tried to speculate exactly what he was doing.

"What, for fuck's sake, is he doing?" Will asked, appearing next to me in the crowd, his arm around Lizzie.

"Erm…" I said, not really sure I believe my own instincts on this.

"So, some rumours got started before we all left for Christmas, and I just wanted to dispel them," Al continued. "See, people started saying I was a horrible boyfriend because I cheated on my girlfriend Amanda, Amanda Jenkins." He pointed at her from the balcony. A spotlight appeared out of nowhere and lit Amanda up. "Say 'hi,' Mandy."

"H-hello," Amanda said, looking bewildered by what was going on.

I was now completely convinced by what he was doing and was trying not to laugh.

"What in the name of Merlin's hairy blue balls…" Dom asked from next to Will.

I pressed my hand over my mouth and bit my knuckle.

"But you see," Al continued. "Okay, wait no. First, I was actually a horrible boyfriend. Because I did cheat on her."

He had the undivided attention of every single person in the Tower at this point.

"And I know you've all seen the pictures of that, thank you Hugo," Al added. "But, really, the cheating wasn't the reason I was a bad boyfriend. 'Cause I did that once and ditched her the next day. No, you see, the reason I was a bad boyfriend is because I'm gay."

Amanda's jaw dropped towards the floor.

"And I don't actually like girls," he said. "But you see, my best friend Dylan, Dylan Abernathy." He gestured at me.

The spotlight turned to me. I lifted my hand in acknowledgement.

"Yeah, I know you all remember him from the pictures too," Al continued.

A few people wolf whistled.

Al cleared his throat. "Anyways, in addition to being gay, and cheating, as far as being a bad boyfriend goes, the problem that trumped it all was that I was in love with someone else the entire time I was going out with Amanda. For about two and a half years now. But, I wasn't comfortable admitting to myself that I was gay, so I did something stupid, like ask out Amanda. All because I couldn't admit to myself that I was in love with my best friend." He laughed like he might have a nervous breakdown at any second. "So, erm, yeah. Everything you've added to your impressions of Dylan that make him seem like a philandering boyfriend stealer, if you could just, stop. That would be great, since it was really entirely my fault. Thank you for your time."

He stepped back from the edge of the balcony and disappeared.

The only sound in the entire room was Amanda seething, and me trying to keep myself from bursting out laughing.

Everyone was staring at us in utter shock. I could practically see the rumour mill headlines circulating in their minds.

Then the door that led to the stairs to the balconies opened and Al stepped out.

Every single eye in the room was glued to him as he edged his way through the crowd until he was standing in front of me.

"Technically, I think this is the part where I grovel," he said. "And apologise to you for being an ass."

I pulled my knuckles out of my mouth since I was relatively sure I could keep myself from bursting into hysterical laughter.

"That depends," I said coolly. "How drunk are you?"

"Stone cold sober," he said.

"Then you can skip the grovelling," I said.

He nodded slowly. "So then what do I do?"

"Shut up," I recommended, before I grabbed the lapel of his jacket and kissed him.

**Review! I beg of you...**

**Chapter title - "Love Like Winter" by A.F.I.**


	31. 31: In Your Eyes

**A/N: Okay folks. I just wrote five chapters in one day. Five. For a grand total of forty five pages and 11,897 words. However, since my wrist will actually cease to function and my fingers will fall off if I keep typing, you will all have to wait until tomorrow for another chapter. Also, there are only twelve left. ****And special thanks to Nibizzy for reviewing. **

**Disclaimer: All of the things Lucy and Lysander say later (you'll understand) are directly from A Midsummer Night's Dream, Twelfth Night or What You Will, Much Ado About Nothing, and Romeo and Juliet.**

**Chapter 31 - In Your Eyes (Lucy)**

It was almost the end of sixth year before I realised why everything felt different.

Things are starting to be…fixed.

They're starting to go right. Everything was going along fine until Ly and Scor's mum died, and then it all went to shit for a while and everything was out of whack, and now it's starting to work itself out for real.

At least in some places.

"At least you're not taking NEWTs!" James exclaimed, looking like he wanted to slap Al.

"No, because they're just normal finals I don't have to worry, right?" Al asked, looking harried.

"Mate, chill out," Dylan said, putting his hand on Al's shoulder comfortingly. "It'll be okay."

He nodded sincerely and Al nodded with him before he put his head on the table in defeat.

James still looked like he wanted to pull his hair out.

Ly rolled her eyes and grabbed James's shoulders and shook him. "You must chill," she commanded. "You must chill."

"I have hidden your keys," Dylan muttered.

Everyone exchanged confused looks, except for Ly and Dylan who apparently thought they were hilarious.

"Care to explain?" I asked.

"Muggle movie," Ly and Dylan said in unison.

"Which one?" Frank asked, pulling his head out of his porridge.

"_Say Anything…_," Ly and Dylan replied.

All they got was blank stares.

"John Cusack?" Dylan asked. "Boom box? Outside her window all night playing 'In Your Eyes'?"

"Three questions," Will said. "Who is John Cusack, what is a boom box and what is 'In Your Eyes'?"

Ly and Dylan looked horribly scandalised.

"Anyone?" Ly asked, looking around at us all.

"I've heard of John Cusack," Sam said. "And I know what a boom box is."

"Why?" Roxie asked incredulously.

"Because I'm Muggleborn," Sam said.

"Oh yeah," Roxie replied. "I know 'In Your Eyes'."

"Thank you!" Ly said.

"What is it?" Frank asked her.

"It's a song, Frank," Roxie replied.

"How does it go?" I asked.

"All my instincts, they return," Roxie started singing. "And the grand façade, so soon will burn. Without a noise, without my pride. I reach out from the inside. In your eyes, the light the heat. Your eyes, I am complete. Your eyes, I see the doorway to a thousand churches, in your eyes."

Everyone from the neighbouring seats was staring at her. I couldn't tell if it was because she was singing at lunch or if it was because Roxie can sing really well.

Frank's jaw was near his midriff and his eyes were hazy.

"You okay Frank?" James asked, looking amused.

I glanced between Frank and Roxie.

Frank nodded mutely.

Weird thought.

I stood up.

"Lucy, where are you going?" Dom asked.

"Library," I replied. We had our Charms final after lunch and as such, Sam was holding a mini study session at the table for all of us. I probably shouldn't have been abandoning ship, but I had other things to do.

"Alright," Ly said.

I waved once and headed up the stairs for the library. Madam Pince glared at me. I smiled sweetly and made my way to the table in the very back.

"So, I think we have to specialise in something in particular so that Honeydukes doesn't kill us," Lysander said the minute I sat down.

"Okay, like what?" I asked, pulling out my notebook and a box of chewable Butterbeer. They look like normal candies but when you bite into them they turn into real liquid Butterbeer.

Lysander grabbed one and smiled. "That's brilliant," he said. "However you did that."

"Thanks," I said, adding a bag of self-popping caramel corn to the table. "But Honeydukes specialises in chocolate. All the other things they've got there are other brands. Like Droobles or Chocolate Frogs."

"Yeah, but I think we need something specific," Lysander replied. "Like…Ice cream or something."

"Ice cream?" I asked sceptically. "Won't Florean Fortescue have problems with that one?"

"Come on," Lysander said. "The man's been dead for…"

We both struggled to do the math successfully.

"A long time," Lysander eventually settled on. "The Alley's been hurting for an ice cream shop."

I thought about it.

"And of course we'd sell your chewable Butterbeer and caramel corn and stuff," Lysander said. "But we'd focus on the ice cream."

"Okay," I said, considering.

After last summer, I had actually kept my promise to talk to him. And then, inexplicably, he'd ended up involved in my plans to open a sweets shop in Diagon Alley after Hogwarts.

"So, we need to start talking about where we're going to get the start-up money," he said.

"Right," I said. "I've been thinking about that."

"What's your idea?" he asked.

"My Uncle George," I said. "He'd do it, especially if we promised to pay him back."

"Okay," Lysander said. "But what's our back up plan?"

"Uncle Harry," I said.

Lysander blinked slowly. "Harry Potter?" he asked, looking twitchy.

"Yeah," I said. "He gave Uncle George the start-up capital he needed to open the WWW."

Lysander nodded slowly, still looking twitchy.

I rolled my eyes.

"So how's things in the popular circle?" he asked.

"I think Frank just fell in love with Roxie," I said. "So that's fun. Rose is still a whore, as is Scorpius. Will is still dating Lizzie. Em and Fred aren't speaking to them. Sam and Dom are hopelessly in love but won't do anything about it. Ly and James seem to be back to where they were before the Great Schism. Al and Dylan are still happy together. Not that that's ever going to change really."

"What about you?" Lysander asked.

"What about me?" I asked.

"Since you watch the patterns of everyone, where are you going to be in three years?" he asked.

"The owner of an ice cream shop in Diagon Alley," I said.

"That's not what I meant," he said, looking down at the papers we've been keeping track of everything on.

"I know," I replied. I just can't see anything where I'm concerned. Other people's love lives are obvious to me more than anything else, but I can't see my own.

"So where are we going to get the flavours for the ice cream do you suppose?" he asked.

"We could strike a deal with Frank," I suggested. "As long as he promises not to drug our ice cream."

"He'd do that?" Lysander asked.

"Have you ever been to the Tower?" I asked in confusion.

"Yeah, but…" he said.

"You've never been down on the dance floor have you?" I asked.

"No," he said. I nodded.

"Okay, well, that's not acceptable," I said cheerfully. "To celebrate the end of finals, there's a party tonight. You're going to go, you're going to drink, and you're probably going to end up SBF, but it happens to the best of us and it's definitely an experience."

"SBF?" Lysander asked, looking worried.

"Spiked by Frank," I explained.

"Drugs?" Lysander asked, looking even more concerned.

"You'll be fine," I said, patting him on the shoulder.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Ooh, Lucy, who's that?" Dom asked when Lysander and I walked in the door. I figured she'd already been drinking, thus her lack of discretion.

"Lysander Scamander," I said.

Lysander looked entirely lost and like he wanted to run up the stairs to the balconies and disappear.

I grabbed him by the elbow before he could run.

"He's never been on the dance floor before," I said by way of explanation. "Could you make sure he doesn't run off?"

"Yeah," Dom said, taking his arm from me.

"You're Dominique Weasley," Lysander said, looking slightly awestruck. "You're touching me."

I laughed and made my way through the crowd. Frank was standing at the self-serve bar looking suspicious with his back turned.

"Frank," I said by way of announcing my arrival.

He jumped wildly and turned around looking incredibly guilty.

I raised my eyebrow.

"What's new, Frank?" I asked.

"Erm…what?" he asked. "In what respect?"

I looked at him pointedly.

"Frank, you're a small time drug dealer," I said. "What do you think I mean?"

"I just wasn't sure," he said. "Erm…why?"

"Besides the fact that I'm the only person in our group who willingly tries the crazy shit you grow?" I asked.

"Oh," he said. "Yeah." He thought about it for a second. Then he grinned. "I've got this great new – but maybe I shouldn't tell you…Trust me?"

"Never," I said. "But hand it over."

"Here you go," he said, handing me a glass.

"I need two," I said. He raised his eyebrow.

"Who are you spiking?" he asked.

"Who says I'm spiking anyone?" I asked, pretending to be offended.

"Lucy, you're the one who, at her first party in second year or something, spent the entire night slipping Al Firewhiskey to see what would happen," Frank reminded me.

"Oh yeah," I said, smiling at the memory. "Hand it over."

"Here you go," he said, giving me suspicious looks. I smiled sweetly at him and made my way back to Dom and Lysander.

"What's that?" Lysander asked, looking at the drinks I had suspiciously.

"I have no idea," I said enthusiastically, handing him one of them. He sniffed it experimentally.

"You didn't get me anything?" Dom asked, sounding hurt.

"I got these directly from Frank," I said.

"Oh," Dom replied. "Well, here's your boy toy." She passed Lysander off to me and disappeared.

"I'm not sure I want to drink this," he said.

I nodded. "Business partners?"

"Business partners," he replied. He glanced back at the drink. "I'm going to regret this, aren't I?"

"Not necessarily," I said, linking elbows with him.

He gave me a look that said, "Are you fucking kidding me?"

I grinned impishly at him. "Bottoms up."

We downed our drinks in one go.

"Oh my god," someone said from nearby. "What is Lucy Weasley doing with _him_?"

"I see their knavery," Lysander said vehemently. "This is to make an ass of me!"

I laughed. Why is he talking like that?

"Lysander, whereto tends all this?" I asked.

Oh Merlin. Why am I talking like this?

"I understand not what you mean by this," Lysander replied, looking as confused as I was.

"You speak not as you think, it cannot be," I said.

My brain. My brain feels fine. I can think normally. So why can't I talk?

"Oh," Lysander replied, looking like he knew the answer. "Then I see Queen Mab hath been with you."

We paused and stared at each other in confusion. Apparently this was not what he had intended to say.

"She is the fairies' midwife; and she comes in shape no bigger than an agate-stone on the forefinger of an alderman, drawn with a team of little atomies athwart men's noses as they lie asleep," he continued, apparently unable to help himself. "Her wagon-spokes made of long spinners' legs; the cover, of the wings of grasshoppers; the traces, of the smallest spider's web; the collars, of the moonshine's watery beams; her whip, of cricket's bone; the lash, of film; her wagoner, a small grey-coated gnat, not half so big as a round little worm prickt from the lazy finger of a maid."

"Lysander riddles very prettily," I heard myself say. "And much beshrew my manners or my pride if Hermia meant to say Lysander lied…"

Hermia? Who the hell is Hermia?

We blinked at each other in utter astonishment.

"What's wrong with you two?" Em asked from next to us.

"By my troth, I speak my thought," Lysander said, looking like he really didn't mean it.

"No; I pray thee speak in sober judgement," I replied.

Em raised her eyebrow at us.

"Frank," she called, rounding on the room in general and dragging Frank away from the bar. "What did you do to them?"

"Do to who?" Frank asked, looking at Em in bewilderment.

"Will you help? An ass head and a coxcomb and a knave, a thin faced knave, a gull!" Lysander exclaimed when Frank arrived.

"If this were played upon a stage now, I could condemn it as improbable fiction," I said.

Frank looked between us and a highly amused smile lit up his face.

"Frank," Em said in a warning tone.

"My most recent herb makes the consumer speak only in Shakespearean quotes," Frank said.

"Who's Shakespeare?" Em asked.

"He wrote a bunch of plays in the late fifteen hundreds and early sixteen hundreds," Frank explained. "He didn't tend to speak in normal words."

"Is't so saucy?" Lysander enquired, looking pissed off.

"What's wrong with him?" Em asked, sounding worried.

"What, with Lysander?" I asked.

"See, she seems completely fine," Em said.

"Fine, i' faith," I said. "Ay that way goes the game…"

"Will it wear off?" Em asked Frank.

"Probably before they get home tomorrow," Frank said. "We should probably send them back to their dorms though."

I rolled my eyes.

"Follow me, then, to plainer ground," I said, leading the way to the stairs to the balconies.

Lysander and I sat on the edge of one, with our legs dangling off.

We sat in silence for about a minute before we burst out laughing.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Apparently everyone forgot we were up in the balconies because we woke up at dawn to a completely abandoned tower.

"Soft, what light through yonder window breaks?" Lysander asked, sitting up groggily.

"It is the east," I said.

I cleared my throat and tried to shake off the headache I had. Miraculously I felt like I might be able to talk normally again.

"So…I say we don't ask Frank to supply the flavourings for our ice cream," I said.

"I agree," Lysander replied.

We glanced at each other.

"Oh thank Merlin," we said.

"Shakespeare…" I said slowly.

"Shakespeare," Lysander agreed. "So, why did my name keep turning up in it?"

I shrugged. "Maybe there was a character called Lysander?"

He nodded. Then he glanced at the window again. "Oh, shit."

"Right, the train!" I exclaimed. We both jumped to our feet and ran for the stairs. We parted ways at the doors to the Tower.

"See you in September," he said.

"Yeah," I agreed. "See you then."

He waved once and ran off towards the Ravenclaw common room. I laughed and made my way to the Gryffindor commons.

Frank was leaning against his trunk, looking asleep.

"Shakespeare?" I asked, kicking him in the foot.

He grinned. "Shakespeare."

**Review!  
><strong>**Chapter title is from the song mentioned earlier, which is by Peter Gabriel. **


	32. 32: White Wedding

**A/N: So, I can't tell if Fanfiction has just stopped sending alerts to the authors or if it's just me, because I haven't been on in four months, and I haven't got any emails telling me that someone reviewed my stories, even though people have (Alyss-gw thanks for reviewing) and I don't know what's going on. **

**Anyways, here's chapter thirty two. **

**Chapter 32 - White Wedding (Roxie)**

"Roxie," Dom said, throwing a shoe at my head.

I jumped and looked up from my pillow.

"What?" I asked, trying not to drool accidentally. I wiped off the corner of my mouth and sat up.

"We're going to Diagon Alley today, remember?" Ly asked, digging through the wardrobe.

"No," I said. "I don't remember."

"And then tomorrow we're going to a wedding," Dom added.

"Who's?" I asked.

"My dad's," Ly reminded me while throwing me a shirt and a pair of shorts.

"Oh right," I said, climbing out of bed and putting my clothes on.

"Can you two believe we're going to be seventh years in a month?" Dom asked.

"No," Ly and I said in perfect unison.

"Yeah, me neither," Dom replied.

"Can you believe that Fred, and James, and Frank are all done with school?" I asked.

"No," Dom and Ly replied in perfect unison.

I smiled at our joint speaking.

"What are we going to do after Hogwarts?" I asked.

"In what respect?" Ly asked, pulling on her Converse to go with the skirt she was wearing.

"Respect of that," I said, nodding at the wardrobe and closet.

"You mean the fact we've forgot which clothes belong to who?" Dom asked.

"Yeah," I replied.

"I suppose we'll probably just have to share a flat," Ly said.

"We all know who you're going to be sharing a flat with," Dom teased, throwing a balled up Quidditch shirt at her.

Ever the Keeper, Ly caught it and glared darkly at Dom.

It was really terrible when Dom was mad at me for dating Sam. That wasn't okay with me. I'm so glad the three of us are back.

"Who are you talking about?" Ly asked, apparently deciding to play dumb.

"Sweetie," I said, patting her knee. "You know he's forgiven you by now, right?"

Ly stared at her feet, at which point she seemed to realise her shoes didn't match.

"Fuck," she said. I couldn't tell if she was talking about the shoes or James.

OOooOOooOOooOO

We arrived in Diagon Alley via Floo. Floo is not my preferred method of travel, and as such, I fell out of the fireplace in the Leaky Cauldron into rather strong arms that belonged to someone who smelled strongly of plants and sunlight.

"Up you go," Frank said, setting me on my feet.

"Hey, Frank," I said.

"Everyone else coming in behind you?" he asked.

"They always send me on first as a warning," I replied.

"You know, it always surprises me that you lot don't just Floo to your parents' house," he said.

I blinked. It's never even occurred to me as a possible course of action. Probably since Fred and I have a baby sister who's just about six. No one's offered an explanation for the eleven year age gap, except for empty nest syndrome.

"My parents' house is dangerous," I replied, realising I was still in Frank's arms. He seemed to realise it at the same time because he let go of me and stepped back awkwardly. "So is it weird thinking you're not going back to Hogwarts?"

"Yeah," he said. "Really weird."

"So what are you going to do?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I know James is talking about getting a job at the Hog's Head, and I was thinking I might do something like that as well."

"Yeah, Dad's talking about making Fred work at the Hogsmeade branch of the WWW for a while," I said. Frank and I had grown up down the street from each other. As kids, he and Fred'd been good mates and never really let me get in a word edgewise. That's probably why I'm so loud.

"So what are you guys doing here?" he asked. "Assuming the rest of them show up…"

"They were having a tiff over the travelling order," I said. "And we got Hogwarts letters yesterday."

"Oh," he said. "Anyone in our group Head of anything?"

"Besides a few very disturbingly crude jokes from Dylan and Al? No," I said.

"So they're still together?" Frank asked.

"Yeah," I said. "One of two couples."

He looked confused for a moment. "Oh, right. Will and Lizzie."

I grimaced at him. The Will and Lizzie thing is just not right.

To my delight, Will was the next person out of the fireplace. He dusted the soot off himself and then his eyes widened in confusion when I grabbed him by the shirt and dragged him off.

"Where are we going?" he asked, waving over his shoulder at Frank.

I dropped him in a dark corner of the Leaky Cauldron and crossed my arms at him. Of the guys in our group, he's certainly one of the best looking. Unfortunately, due to his aptitude in Transfiguration, he's also one of the most conceited.

Actually, I take it back. He's definitely the best looking. If I liked blonds, I'd probably fall for the Scorpius charm, but I don't generally, and as such, Will wins my vote.

I narrowed my eyes at him, and drummed my fingers on my arms.

"Am I in trouble?" he asked.

"Yes," I said. "Very much."

He cringed and scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. "What've I done now?"

"Lizzie," I said crossly.

"I haven't actually done – I would never actually sleep with Em's sister," he said.

I raised my eyebrow at him sceptically.

"Then why are you dating her?" I asked.

"Why do you care?" he asked. "We broke up years ago."

I tapped my foot. "We broke up because you have a tendency to be a conceited asshole," I reminded him. "Which you're demonstrating again. What makes you think that I'm mad for something having to do with me?"

He blinked, trying to follow what I'd said. "Girls are confusing," he said. "So why am I in trouble for dating Lizzie?"

"Depends on why you're dating her," I said. "And tell me the truth, because otherwise, I'll go ask Sam."

He looked away and then at the floor and then at the far wall and then at the ceiling. Anywhere but my eyes.

"To make Em jealous, alright?" he said finally, looking flustered.

"That's why you're in trouble," I said, smiling darkly at him.

"Great," he said.

I considered him for a moment. "You actually love her don't you?"

"Who?" he asked.

"Em," I said.

"Yeah," he mumbled. "Alright?"

"Does Lizzie know you're using her?" I asked. I don't particularly like Lizzie all that much. She obviously has horrible taste in men if she'd date my brother. But I like Em well enough, even though combined Em, Lizzie, Will, and Fred are more drama than pretty much everyone besides Rose and Scorpius.

"It was her idea," Will said. "Since she wants Fred to rethink his propensity to try and kill me."

"Because dating you is definitely going to help," I said drily.

"Yeah, well," Will said. I shook my head at him and let him go back to the fireplace to join the rest of our group.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The wedding was a hit with everyone who attended as far as I could tell. A large group of adults from both Draco and Amy's jobs appeared and swarmed the reception hall. None of our various parents were in attendance, but they all sent wedding presents. Probably as a belated thank you for storing their children for almost seven years.

It seems like a logical way to raise children. Give birth to them, instil them with proper values and notions, then send them off while they go through puberty and become insane, and only take them back once they've grown.

For the first time in a very long time, I avoided the dance floor. Lacking a balcony like we have at the Tower, I lurked near the back of the dance floor at one of the tables.

"I don't know where she gets the nerve," Dom said, dropping into a seat next to me. She didn't sound angry like most people do when they say "don't know where they get the nerve." She sounded confused.

"Who, what, and what did she do?" I asked.

"Rose," Dom said incredulously, shaking her head at the dance floor. I followed her gaze and saw Rose making out with some random Ministry intern.

It's nice being of age.

"What nerve are you talking about? She's got a practiced slut's nerves," I said. I don't actually mind Rose. I think I'm one of the few.

"I know, but she can just go up to a guy and say, 'hey, by the way, you should kiss me' and he'll do it," Dom said.

"Dom," I said, taking a drink of my finally legal alcoholic beverage. "You could wink at a guy if you wanted to, he'd turn into a blathering fool, and would do anything you asked him to. You just try to deny that particular part of your genetic makeup."

"I know, but," Dom said. "I mean, where do you find the courage to just walk up to a guy and say, 'hey, kiss me.'"

I looked around the room for easy victims. Preferably one I wasn't related to.

Scorpius was sitting alone a few tables over, looking dark over the rim of a beer bottle.

Dom looked where I was looking.

"Yeah, but he's a whore," she said. "Of course he'd say yes."

"You said 'find the nerve,' not 'find the nerve with someone socially acceptable,'" I reminded her. She watched me with disapproval and some amusement in her eyes while I stood up and walked over to Scorpius's table.

He looked up curiously when I sat down.

"Hi," I said.

"Hello," he said, looking suspicious.

"Kiss me," I said, smiling at him.

He raised his eyebrow like he wasn't sure I was serious and then kissed me.

"Thanks," I said, turning around in my chair and waving at Dom, who had her jaw near the table. "Your turn," I called.

She turned pink and stood up, disappearing into the dance floor. She had better go find Sam and snog him.

"Okay…" Scorpius said slowly. "Now explain."

"We were talking about where people could find the nerve to go up to someone and say 'kiss me,'" I explained.

"Aha," he replied.

"So, this is not your usual MO at parties," I said casually.

"No, it's not, is it?" he asked. He looked over the dance floor, shuddered slightly, and took another drink of his beer.

"This was your MO at our first party in the Tower in second year," I said. "Back before you got…like this."

"Before I became an asshole?" he suggested. "Or before I became a manwhore?"

"I thought those coincided," I replied.

He shrugged. "Yeah, probably." He glanced over the floor again. "I never meant to stop being friends with all of you."

Am I actually hearing Scorpius Malfoy's side of the Whore War?

"You didn't really, did you?" I asked. "You're still friends with Dylan, and Al, and Will, and Sam, and well, everyone except Rose, aren't you?"

"I suppose," he said. "I've just been a really shit friend."

I had to laugh. "Okay, you really are out of the loop aren't you?"

"How do you mean?" he asked.

"We're all shit friends," I said. "I mean, look at us. Almost none of us get along, a lot of us make each other miserable, most of us have 90% blood alcohol content, a few of us do drugs. We're the most fucked up group of people to go through Hogwarts. Pretty much ever."

Scorpius nodded and took another drink. "Death Eaters," he replied.

"Okay, we're not that fucked up," I admitted. "But seriously? You don't win the shit friend award."

"Who does?" he asked.

I thought about it. "Right now, probably me."

"Why?" he asked, looking confused.

"Because, I mean, really? Dom's been in love with Sam for Merlin knows how long, and then I went and dated him. Dom's my best friend and I did that," I said. "You're no more screwed up than the rest of us."

"I'm not?" he asked, sounding like he didn't believe me.

"No," I said. "You're not."

We sat in silence for a minute or two. I looked across the dance floor again. Dom and Sam were dancing together at least, even if they weren't snogging. Ly and James were dancing as well. Al and Dylan were being unbelievably cute. Lucy and Em were dancing together along with Fred. Rose still had her Ministry intern. Will and Lizzie were dancing together in full view of Em and Fred. I shook my head at them.

"I've had this theory," Scorpius said quietly. "These past three years or so."

"What theory?" I asked curiously.

"I've had this theory that once your heart's broken, you're fucked," he said. "And it never gets better. But…"

He nodded at Ly and James and then at his dad and Amy.

"But now everyone seems to be getting better, even though they shouldn't," he said. "If you've only got one shot at love and then you cock it up…"

I raised my eyebrow at him and took his beer away.

"You don't usually drink do you?" I asked. "At parties."

"Thanks for the clarification," he said. "I usually just drink in the attic with the guys."

"Yeah, I can tell," I said.

We sat in silence for a minute again.

"But do you know what I'm saying?" he asked. "About the brokenness?"

"No," I said. "Because you're wrong."

He nodded slowly. "But then what do I do?"

**Review! (even though I don't get to know about them unless I look at the story...)**

**Chapter title from the Billy Idol song, even though it's not technically relevant. **

**Oh, and the whole, "Hey, kiss me" pick up line does actually kind of work, at least if it's someone you know. Just saying...**


	33. 33: How You Love Me Now

**A/N: Yeah, yeah, it's been a while. I apologise. Sincerely. I was having major stress issues about "what college are you going to go to, and what are you going to major in, and what do you even want out of college." It made writing hard. Anywhoodles, I have now updated. Late. I know. I'm sorry. And I don't think it fully does anything good either. But it progresses time. Which is important in this particular story. **

**In the story, it's the very beginning of seventh year. Fred, James and Frank have finished school. Everyone else is a seventh year. **

**Chapter 33 - How You Love Me Now (Em)**

I walked into the Slytherin common room, looked around for about thirty seconds, and then walked back out.

I am not spending my seventh year here.

But that leads to the question of where I am going to sleep. I don't think I could get a petition going that would let us abolish house based dormitories. At that point, I think I'd probably end up with a petition trying to abolish houses and that wouldn't work.

I wandered aimlessly through the halls for a few minutes until I decided upon the Tower as the probable best course of action. Either that or the Quidditch locker rooms. That might actually be more comfortable. And less noisy.

I turned around and headed down towards the front doors, walking briskly across the lawn until I got to the Quidditch pitch. I ducked into the Slytherin changing room and set up camp in the corner. Then I started hearing voices.

I stepped out of the changing room onto the pitch and saw Will and Sam sitting in the stands deep in conversation about something.

Breaking up with Will did seem like the best idea at the time. If he couldn't be bothered to be mature enough to not try and kill Fred, then why would I continue to date him?

At least it seemed like the right choice. But he really is quite cute.

I just wish he wasn't dating my sister.

I made my way up the stairs to where they were sitting.

"But, no," Will was saying. "Because, I mean, the scouts are coming this year for me and Dom and Ly. Hugo and Kelly and whoever else ends up playing Chaser are just auxiliary."

I sat down and Sam and Will looked up.

"Quidditch?" I asked.

"Usually," Will replied, smiling at me.

"Oh, that's right," I said. "Because two of your Chasers just finished school."

"Yeah," Will agreed. "I never thought I'd say this, but I miss Fred."

I laughed. "So, you guys know it's sort of late, right?"

"Yeah, so?" Will asked.

Sam was staring off, looking confused by something.

"Because you're out in the Quidditch pitch late at night and we do sort of have class tomorrow," I said.

"But…" Sam said slowly, apparently not part of the conversation Will and I were having. "How did they figure out you'd be good at it?"

Will suddenly looked panicked.

"Good at Quidditch?" I asked. "Well, you were there that summer, Sammy. We made him play Quidditch with us and then he ended up doing really well…You're not talking about Quidditch are you?"

"Just because you're good at Transfiguration?" Sam asked Will. "They just thought, 'oh, hey, we'll make you an Animagus just because we can'?"

Will closed his eyes in apparent duress.

"Did you just say Animagus?" I asked.

"Will's an Animagus," Sam supplied helpfully.

"Sam, that was supposed to be a secret," Will said, sounding stressed.

"Yeah but it's Em," Sam said, gesturing at me. "And you-"

Will reached over and slapped his hand over Sam's mouth.

"I'm better," Sam said through Will's fingers.

"Thank you," Will said.

I kept staring at him.

"You're an Animagus?" I asked.

"Yeah," he admitted.

I stared at him imploringly. "Come on then. Show us."

"Do I have to?" he asked.

"Yes," Sam and I said in unison.

Will groaned and turned on the spot. In his place was a tall, dark brown dog with floppy ears and a white blaze up his nose. His paws were white as well as his chest. He sat down on the bench and stuck his back paw in his ear.

Why does he get to be cute, even when he's a dog?

He turned back into himself and lounged backwards on the benches.

"That's amazing," Sam said enthusiastically. "I wish there was a charm that let you…"

He trailed off and pulled a notebook out of the inside of his coat before he scribbled something in it.

"Should I worry?" I asked. I've been friends with these people for almost six years and I still don't know if I should worry about Sam.

"Nah," Will said. "He's just…that way. Your perfume smells nice, by the way."

I raised my eyebrow at him. "Really. How's Lizzie?"

He had the sense to look ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry," he said finally.

"For what?" I asked. "Dating my sister, trying to kill Fred on multiple occasions, not telling anyone you're an Animagus, being a conceited asshole…"

"Yeah," he said. "All of that."

I nodded and stood up, heading back for the stairs so I could go to sleep in the changing rooms.

"Wait, Em!" Will called after me.

"Sorry's a nice start," I replied, ducking into the stairs and ignoring him.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Class," Lucy complained, grimacing at me and eating a sugar mouse.

"Seventh Year Syndrome?" I asked.

Lucy nodded.

"And your drug dealer finished school," I added.

Lucy nodded again.

"We are so dysfunctional," Ly said, sitting down across from me at the table.

"No you think," Dom said, sitting down next to Ly.

"Obviously," Roxie agreed, sitting on the other side of Ly.

"Hugo!" Dom yelled down the table. "Coffee and toast!"

Hugo, in addition to being Dom's bitch as he's the youngest Weasley on the Quidditch team, is still supposedly paying penance for leaking the infamous naked pictures of Dylan and Al last year. In his defence, he and Dylan were sort of together at the time, which had to suck, but still. He ran down the length of the table and gave Dom the food she'd requested before buggering off somewhere else.

"I hate Quidditch try outs," Dom said. Ly patted her on the shoulder.

"We're down to…what?" Ly asked. "You, me, Hugo, Will, and Kelly Wood, yeah?"

"Yeah, five people. Great," Dom said. "I have to find two chasers to replace Fred and James. Do you know how fucking impossible that's going to be?"

"Dad said he always felt bad for Uncle Harry having to replace him and Uncle Fred as Beaters," Roxie said.

"Yeah, we've got Beaters thanks," Dom said.

"So, you mean that Slytherin might actually have a chance against you this year?" I asked, raising my eyebrow suspiciously. My Quidditch captain was a sixth year with a serious attitude problem. He was confident we could beat Gryffindor this year. I told him he was full of complete and utter shit. He didn't take it kindly.

"No," Dom and Ly said in perfect unison.

"Kelly's good as a Seeker, and we've still got Will and Ly," Dom said.

"So, Ly, are you going to go pro?" Lucy asked. "I know Dom is, but…"

"No, I meant it last year when I told Professor Longbottom I intend to be one third of the takeover crew for the WWW," Ly said.

"I'm so glad Fred and James are talking again," Roxie said, shaking her head at her wayward brother.

Ly stared at her breakfast, ashamed.

"If my mum had died I would've done something worse than what you did," I said kindly. I really liked my aunt Astoria. I completely understand Ly's actions. My idiot cousin, however, I understand a bit less.

I glanced a few tables over at Scor, who had his arm around a bimbo of some Ravenclaw persuasion.

"If your mum had been the one to die, you would've celebrated, be honest," Ly said, raising her eyebrow at me. I winced.

"Okay, yeah, maybe, but that's still worse than sleeping with someone," I pointed out. "I don't forgive Fred, mind, but I forgive you."

"Have you heard from her at all?" Dom asked.

Let's see. Since my mum and dad got divorced, I have not heard from my mother. She didn't actually say goodbye.

Good fucking riddance.

"Nope," I said cheerfully.

"That's not healthy," Roxie said. "Talked to Will lately?"

I raised my eyebrow at her overly casual tone. "Yeah, why?"

Together we glanced at the next table where Will was sitting with Dylan, Al, and Sam with his arm around Lizzie.

"No reason," Roxie said.

"Sure…" I said slowly. However, before I could grill her about it, a random boy dropped into the seat next to Lucy. Dom seemed to know who he was, at least there was a spark of recognition in her eyes.

"Hey, Lucy," he said, smiling shyly at her.

He had sandy blonde hair that kept falling in his eyes in corkscrews and huge grey eyes that seemed somewhat intelligent. He looked like he was a seventh year like us.

I had absolutely no idea who he was.

"Hello," Lucy said casually.

"Did you talk to your uncle George over the summer?" the guy asked.

"I did," Lucy said. "He's in."

"What's my dad doing?" Roxie asked curiously.

"Backing us financially for our ice cream shop," Lucy explained.

"Great," the guy said. "Well, I'll see you in class then."

"See you," Lucy said. He smiled awkwardly at all of us and walked away, straightening his Ravenclaw tie.

"Who the fuck was that?" Ly asked, staring after him.

"He was cute at least," Roxie said. Ly nodded in agreement.

"Lucy…" I said imploringly. "Who was that?"

Lucy turned mildly pink and pushed her glasses farther up her nose. "His name's Lysander," she said.

"Wait…" I said slowly. "He's the one who you got SBF with last year at the Tower."

"With the Shakespeare juice, yeah," Lucy agreed.

"Lucy," Ly admonished. "Drugging innocent Ravenclaws for your own devious purposes."

"There was nothing devious about it," Lucy insisted.

"Sure there wasn't," Dom said. "Are you sure you didn't do it to have your way with him?"

"Please," Lucy said. "I'm a Weasley. We don't need to resort to drugs to ensnare boys."

"True," Dom and Roxie agreed.

"Did you all know we're the popular people at the school?" Lucy asked.

"Yeah," Dom and Ly said.

"It's a Quidditch thing," Ly added.

It makes sense that we'd be the popular people. That's why so many people signed my petition. Useful to know.

OOooOOooOOooOO

A few weeks later, I was wandering the halls late at night. Up ahead I could hear whispered voices.

"We just have to…it's just not working," Will was saying.

"Yeah, I know," Lizzie said.

I kept to the shadows, but tried to edge closer.

"So, I guess this is it then?" Will asked.

"I suppose," Lizzie said. "I'll just tell him he has to stop being a prick."

"And I'll grovel and we'll see where that gets me," Will replied.

Who would Will be grovelling to?

"Best of luck," Lizzie said.

"Thanks," Will said. "You too."

I heard Will's footsteps going off in the other direction, so I snuck up on Lizzie.

"What just happened?" I asked. She jumped and whirled around.

"Em!" she exclaimed in surprise.

"Yeah," I said. "What happened?"

"I know you don't think it's good, but I really like Fred," she said. I raised my eyebrow.

"Then why, for fuck's sake, were you dating Will?" I asked.

"Mutual agreement," she said.

"Mutual agreement for what?" I demanded. Why on earth would he mutually agree to date my little sister?

Lizzie smiled at me for real, instead of looking guilty. "Mutual agreement to get the people we love back."

**Review! (Please?)**

**Title from the Hey Monday song, "How You Love Me Now." Tell me how can you sleep? How can you breathe? Baby tell me how, how you love me now. Tell me how can you sleep? How can you breathe? I hate when you say how you love me now. **


	34. 34: Where Is My Head?

**A/N: Two chapters in one day! Not quite penance yet, I know. But well on my way, right? And hey, there's only nine chapters left after this... Whether or not that's a good thing, I don't know. Anyways, here's my spiel about drugs! Don't do them. Ever. Just...don't. **

**Also, to all of my reviewers, I love you guys and I'm sorry it's taken me so long to reply to your reviews. And to those of you who review anonymously, I'd love to reply to your reviews, but you don't sign them so I can't. **

**Disclaimer: I don't approve of any of the behaviour of any of my characters. Just saying. **

**Chapter 34 - Where Is My Head? (Dom)**

"What really amazes me is that they even though they stood a chance," Hugo slurred, draping his arm around me. I leaned away from his booze breath.

I glanced through the crowds in the Tower, looking desperately for anyone to take Hugo off my hands. Time was, I could just give him to Dylan and have it done with. However, Dylan is now the sole property of Al (definitely a good thing) so I don't get to do that.

Suddenly, I alit upon a very drunk and almost certainly gay boy from Hufflepuff.

"Hey, you," I called at him. He jumped and looked worried. "What's your name?"

"Gary…" he said slowly, looking concerned.

"Gary," I repeated. "This is Hugo."

"I know," Gary said, giving Hugo a once over like he could be interested under the right circumstances.

"Why don't you two talk?" I suggested, ducking out from under Hugo's arm and making a break for it.

"Do you bloody lot have any idea how fuckingly difficult it is to break into this school?" Fred asked from a now open painting. Roxie, who was nearby, Lucy, who was lurking in a corner with a bottle of Firewhiskey and Lysander, and I all turned and stared at the portrait. Fred dropped to the floor cheerfully and caught Frank as he fell out of the hole behind him. James was the last through.

"You three finished school, why the fuck would you come back?" Lucy enquired.

"Never one to pass up a good party," James said, smiling at her.

"Lucy!" Frank exclaimed.

I saw a dark look cross Lysander's face.

"Frank!" Lucy replied, hugging him. To my complete and utter shock, a dark look crossed Roxie's face as well.

"Free of charge," Frank said, offering Lucy a bag of something. Lucy raised her eyebrow at him.

"What does it do?" Lucy asked.

"No one knows," Frank said. "I found it in my garden this morning."

"Great thanks," Lucy said, grabbing Lysander by the hand and disappearing. Lysander looked mildly disturbed, but quite thrilled that Lucy was touching him.

"How long do you think it'll take before she gets him drugged enough that he jumps her?" Will asked, appearing next to me out of the crowd.

I shrugged.

"Have you seen Sam?" I asked.

He raised his eyebrow at me in a condescendingly knowing way. "Speaking of jumping people, Miss Weasley…"

"Fuck off," I replied. He grinned at me.

"Last I saw him he was drunkenly conversing with the hat rack," Will said, gesturing through the throng of people. "Why do you want to know, oh captain my captain?"

"Because I need someone to dance with, you fuck ball," I replied. "Stop implying things."

"I'm implying nothing," Will said, grinning at me. "I was merely asking questions."

"Well, stop," I recommended.

I beat my way through the crowd and found my path impeded by Al and Dylan, who were occupied with snogging each other.

"Excuse me," I said, trying to break through them. They ignored me. "Oh for the love of Merlin, would you two just get a room?"

This got their attention. "That is a fabulous idea, Dom," Dylan said, grinning roguishly at me. Al nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

"Well, you're in my way," I said.

"What's got your panties in a twist?" Al asked.

I raised my eyebrow at him and said in the most deadpan voice I could muster, "Who says I'm wearing any?"

"Damn, Weasley," said a somewhat skeezy voice from behind me. "I don't believe you. I think you should show me."

I turned around and glared at Ioan. "You're a fuck head," I informed him. "I'm sure you've heard that before."

Ioan smirked at me and started to put his hands on my waist. I tried not to be sick.

"Well, you're a Veela," he said. "Shouldn't you be fucking people all the time?"

Before I could beat the shit out of him, someone else came out of nowhere and tackled him, dragging him to the ground and breaking his nose in a thirty second succession.

"You take that back," the attacker said, holding Ioan by the shirt collar with one hand and holding his fist coiled back, ready to strike.

"Whoa there, mate," Dylan said, grabbing Sam's wrist. Al grabbed Sam's other elbow and they pulled him off Ioan.

"You don't get to call her that," Sam growled, looking like he wanted to kill Ioan.

"What'd he do?" Scorpius asked, appearing out of nowhere with a bottle of Firewhiskey and a very dishevelled look to him.

"Called Dom the V word," Sam growled, struggling against Dylan and Al's restraints.

Scorpius smiled bitterly. "Please, allow me," he said cheerfully, before he turned and kicked Ioan in the nuts. Sam, Al, and Dylan all recoiled in horror and held their own junk with their knees pressed together as if it was an automatic reaction.

Ioan's face turned bright purple and then transitioned to green and he looked like he might be sick.

"We're not even yet Malfoy," he croaked in Scorpius's direction. "Just remember that."

Scorpius looked like he was about to do more damage to Ioan, but James showed up at that moment thankfully. He wrapped his arm around Scorpius's neck in a choke hold.

"Come on, mate," he said, dragging him backwards through the crowd. "Let's you and I go get piss drunk."

"Thank Merlin for James, right?" Al said, pulling Sam away from Ioan and retreating further into the crowd. I followed them.

"Why?" Dylan asked. "If Scor and Ioan were talking about what I think they were, then I'm kind of glad Scor kicked him."

"Why?" I asked. I would've kicked him given the opportunity, but Sam beat me to it.

"Because Ioan intends to do dishonourable things to my stepsister," Dylan explained, glancing through the crowd like he was looking for Ly. Last I'd seen her, she was drinking by herself in a corner. Someone should probably tell her James is here.

"Well, it's a good thing James was here, since he's the only person in our group of mad people who's taller than Scor," Al continued. "Well, we're going to go follow your advice, Dom."

"Really?" I asked. "That whole exchange didn't kill the mood?"

Dylan and Al thought about it for a second. "No," they concluded finally, smiling deviously at me and Sam and handing me their bottle before running out of the room.

"I mean, I'm glad Al's out now and they're together, but they're like rabbits," I muttered.

"I'm sorry Ioan called you a Veela," Sam said, more to himself than me it seemed. "He doesn't get to call you that."

"No one gets to call me that," I pointed out.

Without warning at all, Sam grabbed my hand and spun me around to the beat of the music. He's sort of funny when he's drunk.

"So when you go pro and are the head Beater for the Hollyhead Harpies, what are you going to do when people say you only win because you're a Veela and you blind the other team?" he asked, leading me in something that resembled at tango through the dance floor.

"Well, I'll dye my hair red before I go pro so people can say we win because I'm a Weasley instead," I said, smiling brightly at him as he dipped me. When I was back at eye level, I noticed for the first time just how very drunk he really was.

"Are you really not wearing underwear?" he asked. Before I could answer, he passed out. I caught him as he started to fall onto me.

"SBF?" Will asked cheerfully.

"No, I think he's just really, really piss drunk," I said. "Help?"

"Yeah," Will said, ducking under one of Sam's arms. I put the other around my shoulder and we steered him out of the dance floor. "We should probably put him to bed."

"I wouldn't go back to your room just yet," I recommended.

"Why not?" Will asked.

"Al and Dylan," I explained. Will nodded.

"Balconies then?" he suggested.

"Yeah," I agreed. We dragged Sam into the stairwell and pulled him up them. "This would be so much easier if Rose didn't make everyone turn in their wands at the door."

"She does have a point though," Will said.

As a group, we'd at least partially forgiven Rose after she took the fall when Professor Longbottom found out about the Tower. However, it meant she was also now responsible for running the Tower, and providing the booze and the music and everything. For safety reasons (friends don't let friends cast spells while sozzled) she makes everyone turn in their wands at the door and only gives them back if she deems the person sober enough to handle magic. If they're not, they have to come talk to her the next morning.

Will and I dropped Sam in a corner in one of the balconies and tossed a blanket over him.

"Right," Will said. "I'm going to go dance now. Congratulations on winning the game, captain."

I rolled my eyes at him as he bounded back down the stairs. I glanced around the balconies. Ly was sitting in her own balcony with a cup. I sat down next to her.

"Hey, captain," she said, grinning at me. I raised my eyebrow at her.

"James is here," I said. "He and Fred and Frank broke in for the party."

Her eyes lit up. "James is here?" she asked. "That's great!"

She stood up and ran down across the balconies to the stairs. A little taken aback by her enthusiasm, I followed her.

She found James and Scorpius without any trouble and threw her arms around James. He looked confused but happy to see her.

"How much has she been dri-" he started to ask me. Before he could finish his sentence however, Ly stood on her toes and kissed him.

When she finally stepped back to let him breathe, James looked happier than I'd seen him in years.

Then to the combined horror of James, Scorpius, and me, Ly giggled.

Ly only ever giggles when she's having an episode.

James's face fell. Scorpius grabbed Ly by the shoulders and turned her to face him. Simple questions. That's what she always told us to ask. If she got them wrong, then it means she's having an episode.

"Lyra," Scorpius said, shaking her a bit to keep her from looking at James. She glanced at him anyways and bit her lip coyly in his direction, winking. Scorpius shook her again. She turned and focused on him instead. "Who'd you lose your virginity to?"

That's his simple question? What the fuck is wrong with him?

Ly rolled her eyes at her twin. "James, silly," she said.

James closed his eyes in pain. Scorpius and I exchanged panicked looks.

He raised his eyebrow at me and glanced at Ly. I nodded and grabbed her by the shoulders.

"Come on, sweetie," I said, dragging her forcefully out of the Tower. Rose glanced at us.

"What happened?" Rose asked, looking like she was evaluating our sobriety.

"Ly. Episode. James," I summarised. To her credit, even though she's become a bitch, Rose looked genuinely concerned.

"Do we know anyone still sober?" Rose asked.

"Try Em," I suggested. Rose glanced around and then darted into the crowd.

"But James…" Ly said, looking confused that I was dragging her away. "I was snogging James."

"Yes, you were," I agreed. "That's bad."

"Why is it bad?" she asked. "We've been married for three years."

"Yeah…" I muttered. "How old are you?"

She rolled her eyes, much the same way she had when Scorpius asked her who she'd slept with.

"Twenty two," she answered promptly. "No…twenty three. I think. Why don't I know how old I am?"

I didn't answer. Rose melted out of the crowd at that moment with Em in tow.

"Just make sure they're sober before you give them their wands back," Rose explained hurriedly.

"Okay," Em said, looking worried in Ly's direction.

"And if you get the opportunity, check on James," I added as Rose and I dragged Ly out of the Tower and back towards the Gryffindor common room.

We got her all the way into the dormitory before she fell asleep.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"This isn't going to go well, is it?" Roxie asked, glancing at Ly's sleeping form.

"No," I agreed.

"Did anything good happen this evening?" Rose asked.

"Since when do you care?" Roxie asked.

Rose rolled her eyes and looked away.

"Sam beat up Ioan on my behalf," I offered.

"That's good," Roxie said. "Rose, who'd you get dragged away from in order to be here?"

"No one," Rose said.

"Sure," Roxie said. "Definitely believe you."

Rose looked away again, back at Ly. She mumbled something incoherent.

"Sorry, what was that?" I asked.

Lucy hadn't come back from the party yet, even though it was the next morning, so I wasn't particularly worried about waking anyone up if this was about to turn into a terrible fight.

"I've slept with four guys," Rose said in perfectly enunciated English.

"Isn't there supposed to be a two in front of that?" Roxie asked coldly.

"No," Rose said. "There isn't. I just tell Scorpius that so that he'll actually fuck up his life."

Roxie and I exchanged confused looks.

"I'm sorry, are you serious?" I asked.

"Yes," Rose said. "Completely serious. I use my reputation to get out of sleeping with them, by letting them tell their friends they had sex with me."

Roxie and I were silent for a minute in shocked contemplation.

"Does anyone else know?" I asked finally.

"Ly," Rose said. "I told her last year."

"Holy shit," Roxie said.

"That's what Ly said," Rose muttered.

"Was it really that bad that Scor slept with Fiona Finnegan?" Roxie asked.

Rose stared at her fingernails like she was regretting the past three years. "He broke my heart," she said. "So I got back at him."

To my utter shock, she sounded like she was trying not to cry. I stood up off my bed and sat down next to her, putting my arm around her shoulder. Roxie did the same. Rose sniffed.

"What made you tell us?" Roxie asked.

"I miss having friends," Rose said, sniffing again.

Roxie and I glanced at each other over her head.

"Well, you've got the three of us," I said.

"Three?" Rose asked.

"I figure we can answer for Ly for most things these days," Roxie explained. I nodded in agreement.

"Thanks," Rose said. We sat in silence for a minute. "The worst part is, even though it really is only four, not twenty four like Scorpius thinks, I'm still the sluttiest person in the entire dormitory."

"Well…" Roxie said, trying to think of a way out of it. "So…I slept with Will and Sam…"

I cringed and tried not to look sour.

"Sorry, Dom," Roxie added. "Ly's slept with my brother and…and Sam…Sorry, Dom."

I nodded in mild irritation. At least in Ly's case, they were both very, very, very drunk.

"Lucy's slept with Scor," Roxie continued. "Dom, you've just slept with Liam, right?"

I nodded. That's something I generally try to forget actually.

"And if Dom, and Ly, and I get to be sort of one person, then really we're the sluttiest," Roxie said.

"That is such flawed logic," Ly grumbled, sitting up and yawning. "Who put me to bed?"

"We did," Rose and I said in unison.

"You three are talking?" she asked in confusion, blinking blearily at us.

"I told them," Rose said sheepishly. Ly grinned.

"Good," she said. "How much did I drink last night?"

"No idea," I said.

"Unfortunately, that may not be the biggest problem," Roxie said gently.

Ly paled. "What happened?"

"You…you had an episode," Rose said.

Ly looked downright terrified now. "What did I do?"

"You kissed James," I said slowly.

Ly relaxed a bit. "I suppose it could've been worse," she said. "I probably would've done that sober and awake."

"Besides the 'about damn time' aspect of that, it was worse," Roxie said through her teeth, looking apologetic. I'd filled her and Rose in on the conversation that followed.

"I don't know if you have some sort of fantasy land where you live when you're having an episode but…" I started.

"But your brother's a fuck head," Rose interjected.

I waved her down. "His question for testing you was who you lost your virginity to…"

Ly's whole face went slack. "What did I say?"

I bit my lip. "You said James."

"Oh, Merlin," she said, covering her eyes.

"In your fantasy world you'd been married for three years," I added.

Ly nodded. "Fuck," she said finally.

"Yeah," the three of us agreed.

"Has anyone seen my shoes?" Ly asked, getting out of bed and digging around for them.

"Why?" the three of us asked in perfect unison. It's nice to have Rose back. Especially since she's not actually a soulless whore like we all thought.

Ly smiled brightly at us. "Because I'm going to go kill my brother."

**Review! **

**Also, the song title has nothing to do with the narrator, more with Ly. "Don't know who this girl is, but she wants to make a mess." (Again, by Hey Monday, because I've been listening to them a lot lately.)**


	35. 35: Smile Like You Mean It

**A/N: Three totally new chapters in one day. Right? Three? God, who knows. I may have entirely lost the ability to count at this point. My math placement test should be fun...**

**Chapter 35 - Smile Like You Mean It (Ly)**

"You absolute fuck head why on earth would you possibly think that was a good question to ask?" I demanded, beating Scorpius with the sole of my Converse. "I can't believe you have the nerve to call yourself my twin brother!"

"Whoa, babe, chill out," Dylan said, grabbing me by the elbows while Scorpius cowered. I struggled against him unsuccessfully.

We were standing in the attic of our flat for the Christmas holidays. Well, Scor was lying on the floor. Dylan and I were standing.

"Shouldn't you be fucking your boyfriend?" I demanded of him.

"Well, I would, see, but he's in Ottery St Catchpole," Dylan reminded me. "Makes it rather challenging. And having sex in a Floo is just – yeah, just don't try it. Trust me."

I seethed at Scor, who dragged himself into a sitting position and poked his swelling eye in minor confusion.

"Simple questions the doctors told us," Scor said. "I figured there was no simpler question. How the fuck was I supposed to know you'd say you'd fucked James instead of Fred?"

"I hate being sick," I said grumpily, crossing my arms and sitting down on one of the couches.

"I'm sure holding your breath until you get your way will work quite well in this instance," Scor said, sliding across the floor away from me.

"You've got diamond prints on your face," Dylan informed him cheerfully.

"Do I?" Scor asked. "You don't say?"

I ran my hands through my hair in irritation. "I'm going out."

"At this hour?" Dylan asked. "How?"

"Mate, we're eighteen," Scor reminded him. "Since we really only barely missed being the year ahead of you motely lot by two days…"

"So?" Dylan asked.

"Apparation," I explained, before I turned on the spot and disappeared.

The minute my feet hit ground I regretted instantly not wearing a coat. Shuddering from the cold and the snow, I ducked into the Hog's Head.

It was entirely deserted except for the lone barman who was wiping down the counter.

"We're closed," he said without looking up.

"Mate, it's Christmas," I said. "Shouldn't you be at the Burrow?"

James dropped the rag he was holding in shock and stared at me. He regained his composure quickly and brushed his hair back out of his eyes agitatedly.

"Too many children," he said dismissively. "Avoiding it as long as I can."

I nodded and sat down at one of the barstools.

"Are you even legally allowed to be at the bar?" he asked me.

"James, you're four days older than me," I reminded him. "And it's not like we haven't been drinking together for…four years? Longer?"

"Five. Approximately," he said. "The first party you went to in the Tower was in October of your second year." He looked down at the bar awkwardly. "Can I get you anything to drink?"

"Just pumpkin juice," I said.

He raised his eyebrow at me in utter shock.

"I have to apparate home," I explained. "It's most of the way across the country."

"Right," he said, reaching under the bar and handing me a glass.

We stood there in silence for fifteen minutes while I drank my pumpkin juice.

"Why are you here?" James asked, sounding like it hurt him to ask.

"Dom and Roxie and Rose told me what happened," I said. "I wanted to apologise."

"For which part?" James asked. "For being sick? For sleeping with Fred? For kissing me? For kissing me before the Christmas holidays four years ago? What do you want to apologise for?"

The bitterness in his voice hurt more than I expected it to.

"Thanks for the drink," I said quietly, dropping a galleon on the table and apparating away.

I landed back in the attic. Scor now had a raw steak pressed to his eye and was lying on one of the couches. Em had joined the party.

"Where were you?" Em asked me.

I said nothing and sat down in one of the chairs. Scor, Dylan and Em exchanged worried looks and then Dylan sat on the arm of my chair.

"I went to apologise to James," I said. "And I think he's still mad at me."

"For being sick?" Scor asked. "Dick…"

Em and Dylan gave him a dirty look.

"Sort of for everything," I said, leaning against Dylan's chest. He stroked my hair comfortingly.

"Those damned Potter men, right?" he asked. I slapped him in the leg. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I can't help it that we have the same taste in men."

"Or at least the same branch of a family tree," Em said.

I almost laughed.

"I'm just so sick of everything being so fucked up," I mumbled.

"I know, honey, I know," Dylan said, continuing to stroke my hair. I sniffled.

The four of us sat in silence for a bit.

"It's all my fault," Scor said quietly.

"No, I fucked up my own life without your help," I said.

"Yeah, maybe, but I fucked everything else up," he continued. "I fucked up Rose, and then she fucked up Lucy, and then the rest of you girls stopped talking to her, and then…"

"And then I slept with Fred, so he and James didn't talk to each other for a year, and then because of that Fred hated himself and slept with Em," I said, nodding in her direction. "Which made Will hate him, which led to a war between them for years that's now culminated in their both being single and miserable, and James hates me."

Scor shrugged like he was still guilty of worse.

"Oh, and then I slept with Sam, which is what made Roxie notice him, and then she and Dom didn't talk to each other for a few months because Dom was jealous," I added. "So you get Rose and Lucy, I get everyone else."

"Actually, Al and I were just fucked up on our own," Dylan said, smiling brightly at me and Scor. "That's the problem with being in the closet and being in love with your best friend. It's just not a good situation. It's much better this way."

"There weren't even closets involved with me and James," I pointed out. "And we still fucked it up."

"At least you do actually still talk to each other," Scor muttered.

Dylan, Em and I exchanged bewildered looks and slowly approached Scor's couch.

"Erm…mate?" Dylan asked cautiously.

Scor dropped the steak off his eye. I'd given him a fabulously purple black eye.

He ran his hands through his hair and looked like he was staring to go crazy. "I – I – I _can't_ get her out of my head," he groaned, sitting up with his elbows on his knees while he pulled his hair out and stared wildly at the floor. "For years."

Dylan, Em and I glanced at each other. I tentatively put my hand on his shoulder. This is the first time in four years that he's actually sounded like my brother.

"I just – I keep seeing her face when she walked into the Great Hall and saw me snogging Fiona Finnegan," Scor said. "I can't make it go away."

There was an edge of desperation in his voice now.

"I've had this theory that there's one person for everyone and once you've fucked that up, you're just fucked," he said. "And I figured I'd already fucked it up, so I was going for anything else since I'd…"

Dylan raised his eyebrow incredulously. "Since you'd already lost the girl you…love?" he asked tentatively.

Scor stared at him with desperate eyes.

"It's never too late to maybe, I dunno, fix it," Dylan said softly. He was talking to Scor, but at the same time, he glanced significantly at me and Em. "Because if you can keep your friends through all the shit you've done…"

"If she's still mad, it means she's not over you," supplied a very odd voice from the attic doorway.

Dad strolled in and looked around curiously. "So this is what you lot have done with the attic. I know we gave you free reign here when you were just kids, but…" He paused and sniffed deeply. "Who brought the alcohol?"

The four of us took a deep whiff. The attic didn't smell like anything to me, so I assume none of the others smelled anything either.

"What alcohol?" Dylan asked.

Dad sniffed again and followed his nose to the hatch where we've been stashing liquor for the past four to five years. He turned around and raised his eyebrow at the four of us while holding several empty bottles.

"We're all of age," Scor pointed out.

"You are now," Dad replied. "And unless you lot have taken to drinking three year old gin, I'm going to say you weren't when you drank this."

"We should really invest in recycling this stuff," Scor muttered.

"Yeah," Dad agreed. "At least before Amy finds it." He smiled like a little boy at the mention of her name. Despite the day I was having, I had to smile at him.

He took another deep breath and then looked mildly repulsed. "Who was having sex up here?" he demanded, pointing his finger at each of us in turn repeatedly.

Very slowly and uncomfortably, Dylan raised his hand and then scratched the back of his head.

Dad narrowed his eyes at Dylan and kept pointing at him. "I'm watching you," he said in a half-heartedly menacing tone. He paused at the door. "It's dinner, in case any of you were wondering."

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Alright. So we've got three months left of Hogwarts. Ever," Roxie said. Dom and I nodded solemnly. "You two do realise what this means, right?"

We nodded again and Roxie dropped a stack of magazines on the floor between us.

Dom grinned first. "Flat shopping!"

We each grabbed a magazine and started flipping through it.

"Ooh, what are you guys doing?" Lucy asked, flopping onto her bed.

"Looking for flats," I replied. "What about this one?"

Dom and Roxie looked at it over my shoulder.

"It's in Muggle London," Roxie said distastefully.

"But it's in a magical neighbourhood," Dom reasoned.

"Yeah but…" Roxie said.

"Yeah," I agreed. "We should look for one in Diagon Alley."

"My mum agreed to it," Rose said, bounding into the dorm and looking surprisingly excited. I really wish she'd tell Lucy she's not a whore. However, considering the reason Lucy's still mad at her is because of one of the guys Rose actually did sleep with, it might not help.

"To what?" Dom asked.

"She's going to help me with the rent for the club," Rose said enthusiastically. "I mean, right now it's just a basement in the Alley, but still. It will be a club. I promise."

"You know what would really help the club's reputation at the beginning?" Roxie asked.

"What?" Rose replied, so happy she was actually bouncing on her bed a little. Dom and I glanced at each other and backed away inconspicuously.

"Live music," Roxie said. "Just for some songs. But if you were to look for a singer…"

"Yes," Rose said. "Definitely. I won't be able to pay you right away, but definitely."

Roxie grinned.

"Who are you going to have bartend?" Dom asked while we continued to slide across the floor back towards my bed.

"I was going to try and get Frank to do it," Rose said. "I figured that drug dealers would probably try to set up territory in my club since it'll be so new, but if I have an established drug dealer already working there, they might back off."

"Are you going to let him sell in your club?" Lucy asked incredulously.

"No," Rose said, staring at Lucy like she was mad. "If you want to get your drugs from Frank, you'll have to buy them from him on his own time."

Lucy narrowed her eyes at Rose, then went back to scribbling in her notebook.

"How's the ice cream shop going?" Dom asked her.

"Fantastic," Lucy said.

"And how's Lysander?" I asked.

Lucy turned pink. "Fantastic," she said in the same uninflected tone of voice.

"How's he compare to Ly's brother?" Roxie asked.

"Lysander and I are not sleeping together," Lucy said drily, continuing to stare at her notebook like she was going to burn a hole through it. The minute she got too close, however, it snapped shut on her nose. She recoiled with a jump. "Fuck him!"

"Fuck who?" Rose asked. "Lysander?"

"James," Lucy complained, holding her nose and shoving her glasses up her face.

"Why?" I asked slowly.

"He charmed all my books to bite me in the nose if I got too close," she said, glaring at her notebook like it was at fault.

"Well…" Dom said. "That does sound like James."

It doesn't just sound like James. It sounds like the James who I made Everlast Colour Change Ink with in second year. And the James who I met in a loo on the train in first year running from Roxie. It sounds like my James.

"Oh my Merlin's balls, I found it," Roxie said, staring wide eyed at her magazine. "Three bedrooms, two bathrooms, just above Madam Malkins."

"But can we afford it?" Dom asked.

"My dad'll pay for it," I said. "Probably without asking questions."

"Well…" Roxie said.

"At least until we all have paying jobs and can afford it ourselves," I added.

"Okay," Roxie said. "But…"

"But?" Dom and I asked.

"But we've got a plan now," Roxie said, grinning at both of us. I couldn't help but smile.

**Review! (Uber special thanks to darkhk, kaitie, and talyag who did)**

**Title from the Killers song, because of the title more than anything else what with Ly not being able to help herself with the smiling...**


	36. 36: The Cave

**A/N: Alright. So, I'm just going to pretend that I actually had this whole thing planned out when I started writing it, and that this chapter was always intended to explain the title. Yeah. I'm just going to go with it. Thanks a million to all my reviewers! I love you guys. **

**Chapter 36 - The Cave (Sam)**

I cheered along with everyone else while the Gryffindor and Slytherin teams took to the pitch. Most of us were in Gryffindor spirit all the way. My face was painted half red half gold, courtesy of Roxie.

I glanced down the line of my friends. Roxie and Rose were at the very end with Rose's hair dyed even more scarlet than it normally is and Roxie's brown hair dyed gold. Lucy was next to them, along with Lysander Scamander.

I wish there was a spell I could make that would show the way people feel about each other…

Scor was next to Lysander, and after him were Dylan and Al. I was on the very end, cheering for Dom as loud as I possibly could.

"Excuse me, young man," said a very adult voice from next to me. "What's your name?"

"Sam Baker," I said, looking at the man next to me. He was holding a clipboard. "What's yours?"

"Thomas Fletcher," he said. "I'm a Quidditch scout."

I nodded. Quidditch scouts tend to lurk at the Hogwarts Quidditch games.

"You seem to know the Gryffindor team pretty well," he said. "Who's playing?"

"Well, the Keeper is Lyra Malfoy. She's a seventh year," I said, pointing at her as she caught the Quaffle that Em had just thrown at her. It's so weird when Gryffindor and Slytherin play each other, since Will's kind of in love with Em and then he has to play against her. "The Seeker is Kelly Wood, she's a fourth year."

The scout nodded. "What about the Chasers?"

"Well, Will Corner's the really good one. He's a seventh year," I said, pointing at him as he flew by with the Quaffle and scored what looked like a nearly impossible goal past the Slytherin Keeper. "Then Christina Webber's a fifth year, this is her first year on the team. And Jacob Lloyd's a third year."

The scout nodded. "And the Beaters?"

"Hugo Weasley," I said. "He's only a fifth year as well. But Dominique Weasley's the captain, and she's a seventh year and she wants to go pro."

The scout smiled at me. "We've had our eye on Dominique Weasley for a while, don't worry."

I nodded at him and turned back to the game in time to see Dom save Will's life from a passing Bludger. I really hope she makes the team.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"I don't want to do NEWTs," Roxie said, looking absolutely terrified. "At all. For any reason. Do we have to? Can we just…not?"

"No," Will, Rose, Ly, and Em said in unison.

"You'll be fine, Roxie," Dom said. "I'm going to fail all of them and then not get a spot on the team because no one will have an idiot on their team."

"You're not an idiot," I said.

"Thanks, Sam," she said, smiling at me. I love it when she smiles.

"I totally understand why James was freaking the fuck out last year," Al groaned, staring at his books. "Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck-"

"Steady on, mate," Dylan said, looking slightly worried.

"Fuck," Al replied.

"Well, it's not like any of us really need our NEWTs to do what we want to do," Lucy said comfortingly.

"No?" Al demanded. "Because they let just every Tom, Dick, and Harry be a Healer these days do they?"

"Okay, well, Al may be fucked, but the rest of us should be fine regardless," Lucy said.

"Maybe I can write my medical thesis on the effects of drugs and alcohol on NEWT performance," Al mumbled, hitting his head on the table.

"Well, that's not going to help," Rose said. "Hitting your head on the table."

"Easy for you to say," Will said. "You're the best in the year."

"Not at Transfiguration, or Charms, or Potions," Rose said. "Since I've got to compete with you lot."

Ly, Will and I stared at the table, slightly chagrined.

"I do sort of need my NEWTs for my career," Ly said.

"Please," Roxie snapped. "Fred and James got eight NEWTs at an acceptable level between them and Dad's still going to give the business to them. And you."

"The best part in all of that is that I'm pretty sure James was the one who got all eight," Dom added.

"Yeah," Roxie agreed. "My brother's a fucking idiot."

"Everyone's brother is a fucking idiot," Dom replied. "Like mine."

"Mine's not," Al said. "Thus my problem."

"Mine is," Ly said. "Obviously."

"Mine too," Rose agreed.

"I don't have a brother," Lucy said.

"Me neither," I said. "Oh god, I don't want to do NEWTs."

"Don't panic, Sam," Dom recommended. I nodded and tried not to hyperventilate.

"All seventh years," Professor MacMillan said from the front of the Great Hall. "Please stay here. Everyone else, please proceed to your classes."

Most of the hall stood up and walked off, chatting happily, blissful in the fact they didn't have to take the stupid test. OWLs were bad enough. I don't want to take NEWTs too.

"Alright," Professor MacMillan said. I like Professor MacMillan. He let me take advanced Charms for years. If I had any wherewithal, I'd want to be a Charms teacher like him, but I don't. I have no ambition. I have no purpose. I just…

"Oh, Merlin, I don't want to do this," Dom whispered next to me.

Without thinking about it, I put my arm around her.

I just want Dom. Is that too much to ask?

"Please take a desk," Professor MacMillan said. "And once the tests are distributed, you will have three hours, no talking. Use only blue or black ink. If I see a single jar of Everlast Colour Change Ink, I will personally charm your quill so you end up writing on yourself instead. As the name is honest, don't expect it to ever come off."

As he spoke, the tests were magically distributing themselves. Mine landed on my desk with a thud. I swallowed nervously. Don't panic, don't panic, don't panic.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I stared at the empty desk in front of me.

I wonder if I could make a charm that would let me see exactly what I got wrong on my test…

That's probably how they grade them.

I hate NEWTs. It's not like I'm even going to have a job when I get out of Hogwarts in anything useful. All I can do is invent charms. That's not exactly employable. I have no prospects.

Fuck.

The future is fucking scary.

"Mate, breathe," Will recommended, handing me a glass of water. "And calm the fuck down."

"Can't," I said. "I've failed all my NEWTs. Every single one. Without question."

"Sam, you couldn't fail a charms test if you tried, had both eyes closed and your wand arm behind your back," Lucy said.

"Remember when the three of us were best friends?" I asked.

"You mean before we started shagging girls instead of being friends with them?" Will asked.

"Yeah," Lucy replied pensively.

I started to hyperventilate.

"Sam, there's nothing you can do about it now," Will said. "Why don't you go take a walk?"

I nodded and walked out the door of the Great Hall towards the Black Lake. I'd barely gone ten feet from the door when someone threw their arms around my neck.

"They offered me a spot on the team!" the girl screamed. "I'm actually going to be a Holyhead Harpy!"

She let go of me at that point and I was able to see it was Dom. Her hair was glowing in the sunlight.

She linked her elbow through mine and dragged me down the slope towards the lakeshore.

"Of course, I don't necessarily get time on the pitch in my first season, but I'm actually on the team," she said. "And training starts in July, so I'll be spending half my time in the flat that Ly and Roxie and I are sharing in Diagon Alley and the other half of it on the pitch training. But the team's strength was never in the Beaters before, so maybe it'll have to be up to me now."

I nodded like I knew what she was talking about.

I wish there was a charm that would let me see what the hell my friends mean when they talk about Quidditch…

"And I need to find out if their current Beater refers more to _The Beaters' Bible_ by Brutus Scrimgeour, or _Quidditch Through the Ages_ or _Beating the Bludgers – a Study of Defensive Strategies in Quidditch_, because I used all three here when I was captain and they work really well together, even though Kennilworthy Whisp wrote two of them and Scrimgeour wrote the other."

I kept smiling and nodding like I had some ability to understand the words coming out of her mouth. She was talking so fast that I really didn't.

I wish there was a charm that let you slow down a person's rate of speech so you could actually understand them…

Especially Dom. I want to hear every word she says.

"And it's not that I'm exactly the _first _player not to have her name start with a G, but I'm pretty close I think," Dom continued. "I dunno. Aunt Ginny said there was someone back in the 1300s who's name didn't start with a G but no one's ever heard of her. Maybe I should change my name."

"Don't forget dying your hair Weasley red," I mumbled.

She beamed at me. "And that too," she said.

She kept talking as we sat down next to the lake.

I don't want Dom to spend half her time in training and the other half in her flat with Ly and Roxie. I mean, I want her to be in training, and I want her to be happy, but I want her to spend some of her time with me. Just a little. Not too much. Just enough. Maybe just a kiss good morning and breakfast occasionally.

I came up with a new theory when I invented a charm that lets you remember what you did while you're drunk. I think that the reason I ended up sleeping with Ly at all (however drunk I was) is because she's got blonde hair and blue eyes and when you're drunk, she looks sort of like Dom.

"When did you find out?" I asked.

"I got out of the NEWTs and my owl was waiting for me with the letter," Dom said before launching off into more Quidditch babble.

The only reason I dated Roxie was because she seemed interested. Dom never really did. She was sort of my best friend, besides Will and Lucy. And she was always nice to me, she just never seemed particularly interested in me as anything more than a friend. And despite all that…

"I've been in love with you for seven years," I said suddenly before I realised I was speaking aloud and slapped my hand over my mouth.

Dom's rapid fire speech slowed down until she'd stopped talking in the middle of a sentence.

"What?" she asked quietly.

I cringed, but since I can't avoid answering a direct question, I repeated, "I've been in love with you since I first saw you in first year."

Her bright blue eyes were wide and her mouth was slightly open in shock.

I figured my foot was far enough in my mouth now that I may as well have it done with.

"You were so excited to be sorted into Gryffindor," I said. "And then you smiled at me. And I think I've been in love with you ever since. Sorry. I'm glad you made the team."

I stood up and started walking back to the castle.

Well, that's that then. She's probably never going to talk to me again. I wouldn't talk to me again.

I wonder if you could make a charm that would let you talk to yourself in actual conversation…

Oh, wait. That's a disease, isn't it?

I was about twenty feet from the castle door when someone tackled me. I made a somewhat manly noise of shock when I hit the grass.

From the bright blonde hair and the sparkling blue eyes, I realised it was Dom.

"Why did you walk away?" she demanded.

I took a moment to assess our situation. I was lying on the grass, Dom was lying on top of me mostly, except she was holding herself up by pinning me down.

"Erm…because I figured you'd never want to talk to me again?" I offered.

She stared at me like I was mental. "Why wouldn't I want to – never mind. You're mad."

She took her hands off my shoulders, grabbed my face, and kissed me. Without me telling them to, one of my arms wrapped itself around her waist and held her closer while my other hand buried itself in her hair. She ran her tongue over my lip, and I opened my mouth obligingly.

"Weasley! Baker!"

Dom sat up quickly and rolled off of me. I sat up ashamedly and stared at my toes while Professor MacMillan crossed his arms and glared at us. I was unsuccessfully hiding a smile.

"I appreciate that you're done with your NEWTs, but this is not the place for PDA," he said. "You two are scaring the piss out of the first years."

"Yes, sir," Dom and I said demurely, standing up and straightening our clothes. We started walking back towards the castle, but Professor MacMillan grabbed my shoulder. He raised his eyebrow at me like he was trying to scrutinise my soul.

"That the girl you were always mooning over?" he asked.

"Yes, sir," I replied awkwardly.

He clapped me on the shoulder. "Good job," he said. He glanced around surreptitiously. "I didn't say anything."

"Yes, sir," I agreed, grinning cheesily at him and running to catch up with Dom. She laced her fingers through mine.

"I didn't realise it at the time, but I think it was probably first year for me too," she said softly, staring at our interlocked fingers.

I grinned stupidly. Then I stopped in the middle of the Entrance Hall and kissed her again.

I really like kissing Dom.

Then someone wolf whistled. We broke apart and found ourselves faced by Will, Lucy, Dylan, Al, Em, Roxie, Ly, Rose, and Scor.

"About fucking time," Roxie said, shaking her head at us.

"So how'd this finally come about?" Will asked.

"Sam said he loved me," Dom explained, smiling bashfully.

"How'd that happen?" Lucy asked curiously.

I shrugged. "I dunno," I said. "I guess I just…didn't panic."

**Review! (And, no, this is not the end of the story. Obviously. I sort of feel like the beginning author's note kind of makes it seem like I'm ending it. But I'm not)**

**Title - "I will hold on hope, and I won't let you choke on the noose around your neck. And I'll find strength in pain, and I will change my ways." - Mumford and Sons**


	37. 37: Guts

**A/N: Alright. I think there's only seven chapters left after this one. Maybe less. I don't have the count with me anymore. Oh well. Anyways, yet another storyline is concluded in this chapter, so enjoy. **

**On a completely unrelated note, I now feel justified for putting all my characters except Em in Gryffindor since I am now an official member of the Gryffindor House on Pottermore. (no, I don't have a life these days, why?)**

**Chapter 37 - Guts (James)**

I was officially moping. I also sort of officially hate myself. Of course, that may be completely logical considering I've been avoiding my family, my friends, and when the girl I'm in love with came to apologise to me, I had a bout of man-ms and bitched her out. And haven't spoken to her since Christmas.

Since I finished Hogwarts a year ago this, well, I guess it's a year ago today, I've spent my time in the Hog's Head, working, while Abe gives me questionable looks. It's mostly because I keep thinking about Lyra, and then actively berate myself for thinking about Lyra. It's not healthy.

"Mate, it's not healthy," Frank said. Since he bartends at the Leaky Cauldron for his mum, and I bartend at the Hog's Head, he, Fred, and I have taken to meeting at the Three Broomsticks for drinks. It's really nice to be eighteen and not have to illegally procure the alcohol.

"What isn't?" I grumbled.

"That," Fred said.

I took another drink. "The grumbling or the alcohol?"

"Yes," Fred and Frank said in unison. I stuck my tongue out at them both and kept drinking.

"Want to talk about it?" Frank asked.

I was silent.

"Well, either you start talking, or we'll make you talk," Fred said, rolling his wand over in his fingers so that it shot off light blue sparks, which skittered across the table before disappearing.

I glared at him reproachfully.

"At the Quidditch party last fall, she kissed me because she was having an episode," I mumbled. "And then she came to apologise over Christmas and I was very rude to her and we haven't spoken since."

Fred nodded slowly like this was what he was expecting.

"Well, there's an end of year party in the Tower tonight," he said. "Rose is throwing it, since it's her last opportunity to have a party there before she goes professional with it."

"Great," I grumbled.

"You're going to go," Frank instructed. "And you're going to apologise for being an ass, and then you're going to snog her."

"Am I?" I asked sceptically.

"You are," Fred agreed. "And if you try to argue with us, I swear to Merlin, I will put a full-body bind on you and drag you."

"Great, thanks, mate," I muttered, finishing off my drink. Fred clapped me on the shoulder.

This is so not going to end well.

OOooOOooOOooOO

It was a brief crawl down the portrait hole in the Hog's Head to the Tower.

"Don't you hate it when you show up for a party covered in slime?" Frank asked cheerfully.

"Frank, you're usually covered in slime," Fred replied.

"Don't you hate it when you're dragged to a party you don't want to go to?" I grumbled.

"James, shut the fuck up," Fred said.

"No one cares what you want to do right now," Frank added.

"I don't like either of you," I replied.

"You are moping, sir, and it must end here and now," Frank said. "All three of us are looking forward to seeing a certain girl there, and it will not do to have you mope."

"You'd better not mean my sister," Fred growled at the back of Frank's head.

"Erm…" Frank said. "Right. Of course not."

Fred kept glaring at the back of his head the rest of the way to Hogwarts.

We dropped out of the portrait hole mostly unnoticed, except by Lucy and Rose.

"Wands," Rose said, holding out her hand. Frank, Fred, and I handed them over without question. "Welcome to the party," she added, smiling at us and disappearing into the crowd.

"Hey!" Lucy exclaimed, hugging me and Fred and holding out her hand in Frank's direction. Frank grinned and handed her an envelope.

"What's that one do?" I asked warily.

Frank waggled his eyebrows suggestively as Lucy walked away. "Let's just say our little Lucy probably won't be a virgin in the morning."

"Frank, mate, she went out with _me_," Scorpius said from behind me. "She's not a virgin."

Frank looked genuinely surprised by this information, which made Fred and I stare at him like he was stupid.

"Well, then, she'll have a very good night," Frank amended.

"Better," Fred said. "Touch my sister I'll kill you."

He disappeared into the crowd with a pointed look at me.

Frank waited for a minute and a half, trying to see if he could spot Fred. Once he decided Fred was entirely misplaced, he grinned lopsidedly at me and Scorpius. "Well, I'm going to go try and touch his sister now, if you'll both excuse me."

He, too, vanished into the crowd.

Scorpius said nothing and offered me a bottle of Firewhiskey. I took a drink and handed it back.

"Rose throws a good party, doesn't she?" I said darkly.

"Yeah, she does," Scor agreed.

I raised my eyebrow at him. "You don't sound bitter?"

He shrugged. "I fucking forfeit."

"Forfeit what?" I asked.

"The Whore War," he replied.

I nodded slowly. "Does Rose know?"

He rolled his eyes. "No," he said. "She won anyways. I don't know how she did it."

"I'm…sorry…?" I offered. I don't understand Rose and Scorpius and their Whore War. I don't see the point.

We stood by the wall and drank together for about half an hour.

"Did you ever do anything with my sister?" he asked suddenly.

"I kissed her once," I said. "And then we got back from the Christmas hols and she shagged Fred."

"Speaking of that particular time," Scor said, staring at something across the dance floor. "Remember how I told you that Ioan Finnegan wanted to get even with me for fucking Fiona?"

"Yeah…" I said slowly, trying to see what he was looking at.

"Remember how he said he wasn't going to count it even until it'd been a twin for a twin?" Scor continued, looking concerned.

I finally saw what he was staring at. Ioan had Ly pinned up against a wall across the room. He had one hand next to her head, the other next to her waist. A pit of acidic jealousy bubbled up in my stomach. It wasn't helped by the trapped look on Ly's face.

I handed Scor the bottle of Firewhiskey and fought my way across the dance floor. I was momentarily waylaid by my little brother.

"Mate," Al said, grabbing my shoulder unsteadily. "Sam got laid."

Dylan raised his eyebrows at Al in concern. I glanced at him for explanation. He shrugged.

"Sam tends to do that," I said, trying to break out of his grasp.

"But it was with Dom," Al continued, looking slightly manic.

I nodded slowly. "Is he SBF or just drunk?" I asked Dylan.

"I have no idea," Dylan said. "I'm going to try and get him to pass out somewhere."

I nodded and pried Al's fingers off my shoulder.

I returned to my quest to beat my way through the crowd. I could just see the top of Ioan's head, completely blocking Ly from view. I made it to them in time to see Ioan kiss Ly.

"Oi, fuck head!" I heard myself exclaim. Ioan took a surprised step back. Ly looked immensely relieved that he was no longer kissing her.

"This doesn't concern you," Ioan said dismissively, turning back to Ly.

I grabbed his shoulder and wrenched him away from her. "Actually, yeah, it does."

Ioan raised his eyebrows at me. "Really? Why's that? What are you to her, Potter? You're not her brother, and you're certainly not her boyfriend, so-"

"No," I agreed. "I'm her _best _friend. And friends don't let friends fuck Finnegans."

Ioan looked as though I'd hexed him. I glanced over his shoulder and saw Ly smile gratefully at me.

"Excuse me?" Ioan asked. "What did you say?"

"Which part?" I asked calmly, clenching my fist.

"What's wrong with us Finnegans?" Ioan asked.

"Besides the fact that you were just trying to coerce Ly into having sex with you when she clearly doesn't want to?" I asked. "Hmm…let me think about that while I go ask Rose for my wand back. I'm sure she'll give it over when I tell her it's to jinx the shit out of you."

Ioan looked like he wanted to hit me, but seemed to decide Rose probably would give me my wand back for that purpose. He turned to storm off and was met by Scorpius.

"What do you say we settle this like men?" Scorpius asked cheerfully.

Ioan looked him over suspiciously while Ly ducked around them and threw her arms around my middle.

"Thank you," she whispered. I wrapped my arms around her as well and caught a whiff of her hair. She smelled like lavender. I love lavender.

"What's your definition of 'like men'?" Ioan asked.

"Sword fight on the parapets of the North Tower," Scor said with a manic gleam in his eye. "Whoever doesn't fall off wins."

"That's suicidal," Ioan informed him.

"Oh, that's right. I forgot you were in Ravenclaw, not Gryffindor. No balls there, are there?" Scor taunted, clearly enjoying himself.

"Fuck you, Malfoy," Ioan said.

Scorpius gave him a once over then shrugged. "Nah, you're not my type. Maybe if you had your sister's tits…"

There was a momentary pause before Ioan lunged after him and Scor turned and ran through the crowd, laughing his ass off. Ioan sprinted after him and eventually they disappeared.

"I worry about my brother," Ly mumbled into my chest.

"I think everyone does," I replied, trying to keep myself from burying my face in her hair and breathing.

We stood there in silence for a minute, swaying to the music.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, holding onto me harder, like she was afraid I was going to let go.

"Me too," I said quietly. "We were doing so well at being friends again, and then-"

"And then I was sick and fucked it up again," she said. I realised that I had one hand entangled in her long, blonde hair and my chin resting on top of her head.

"That was not your fault," I said. "The reason we haven't talked since Christmas is because I have this propensity for being an asshole."

"No you don't," she replied, her lips brushing against my chest as she spoke. She sounded like she was about to cry.

"How about I walk you back to the dorms," I suggested. She nodded.

I let go of her but kept my arm around her shoulders. She leaned against me. We passed Rose on the way out. She raised her eyebrow at us curiously and then handed over our wands after deeming us sober enough.

We walked the entire way to Gryffindor Tower in silence, thankful we ran into no teachers, as I technically was not supposed to be here.

Ly gave the Fat Lady the password and I followed her into the common room. No one was around. I stopped at the bottom of the stairs to the girls' rooms.

"You're not going to come up?" Ly asked, sounding vulnerable.

"I can't," I said. "The stairs will scream."

"You did that once," she reminded me.

I grinned at the memory. "Yeah, but I don't have my shoes that walk on the ceiling handy."

She smiled back at me, then bit her lip like she was thinking about something.

She pointed her wand up the stairs. "_Accio_ broom," she commanded. There was a brief thud, and then her broom came whistling down the stairs.

"Race you," I said, taking the broom. She grinned and sprinted up the stairs. I flew past her easily. She's got a very nice broom.

I landed just inside the door to her dormitory and had already set her broom down by the time she ran into the room, slightly out of breath. Without thinking about it, I ran my hand through her hair again and kissed her. Her eyes fluttered shut and she linked her arms around my neck.

After a few seconds, we broke apart. I wasn't quite sure about her, but my heart was racing.

"Sober?" she asked, barely above a whisper.

"Sane?" I replied.

She nodded slowly, and I nodded as well, before I wrapped my other arm around her waist and kissed her again.

She kissed me back passionately, her hands leaving my neck and trailing down my back as we stumbled backwards. She ran her tongue over my lip as she quickly undid the buttons on my shirt. It fell to the floor in a pile, and her hands roamed all over my chest while she continued to push me backwards. I fell with a thud onto a bed, pulling her down with me.

Throwing all caution to the wind, I let my hand trail from her back down her leg to the hem of her dress.

"It zips," she mumbled, kissing my jaw feverishly. I nodded and found the zipper. She kissed me again, running one hand through my hair and pulling off my glasses with the other. Of all the days to not wear contacts…

I unzipped her dress and it practically fell off into a pile. I slid my hand up her back to try and undo her bra, only to discover she wasn't wearing one. She trailed her hands down my chest without breaking our kiss and undid my belt and then my jeans. She flipped us over so I was on top and pulled my jeans all the way off.

I kissed down her throat and she gasped slightly.

"Ly?" I whispered between kisses.

"Yeah?" she whispered back.

"I – I love you."

She grabbed me by the hair and kissed me again. "I love you too."

OOooOOooOOooOO

I woke up to the smell of lavender.

Instinctively, my arm tightened around Ly's waist. She nestled back against me in her sleep. I kissed the side of her neck and she smiled in her sleep.

I felt the stares before I actually noticed them.

"My only question is how the fuck you got in here," Roxie said cheerfully.

I blinked and squinted in her direction. "Go away. I'm sleeping."

"You call _that_ sleeping?" Roxie asked, crossing her arms. "Then why were _these_ on my bed?"

She held up my boxer shorts like they were something disgusting.

I tried not to laugh. "Ask Ly," I said. "She's the one who threw them."

"Well, I'll have to, since we're about to miss the train back to London. And Fred owled. Apparently, Abe's pissed because you're late for work," Roxie said.

"I really don't care about my job," I said.

"Well, if you plan on sneaking onto the train with us, you should probably get up," Roxie said. "And, Ly, I know you're faking it."

"Faking what?" Ly mumbled, lacing her fingers through mine.

"Being asleep," Roxie said. "I would never dare insinuate anything else."

"Yes you would," Ly and I said in unison.

"Yeah, I would," Roxie agreed. "Anyways, you've got forty minutes until the train leaves, and that has to include getting to Hogsmead, so I'd get dressed if I were you two."

She ducked out of the room and I heard the door close. The minute she was gone, Ly rolled over to face me. I found myself lightly stroking the side of her face.

"So…" Ly said, brushing my hair off my face.

"So," I echoed. "We've got about four years' worth of last nights to make up for."

She nodded solemnly. "And we've got forty minutes."

"And we can both apparate," I added.

"So we should definitely get started now," she said.

"My sentiments exactly," I replied, grinning and kissing her.

"I love you," she said.

"I love you too," I replied, kissing her again.

I'm never going to get tired of saying that.

**Review!**

**Title - Guts, All Time Low: It feels like finding out I've got the guts to say anything. **

**Another side note, I have been waiting to use the line "Friends don't let friends fuck Finnegans" since I started writing this story. And now it's in pseudo-print. Muahahahaha**


	38. 38: You Could Be Happy

**A/N: Okay. Shorter chapter. Smaller pairing, but relatively important character. There are only five chapters left after this one, then this story will finally be over and stop sucking away at my life. Not that I really have a life these days, but...whatever. Anyways, yes. Five left. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Chapter 38 - You Could Be Happy (Fred)**

"I am so not supposed to be here," I muttered to myself as I snuck onto the Hogwarts Express. Of course, that's never exactly stopped me before, but still.

I passed the compartments of people who were actually supposed to be on the train and made my way to the very last car on the train. If I'd been smart and not running, I would've been able to just get onto that car to begin with, but it was a last minute decision, crashing the party on the Hogwarts Express.

I stopped at the sliding door that would lead me to the car. Somewhere in the last year, it'd been renovated from one of the compartment cars to one that just had a bunch of benches and tables between them. Much more convenient.

Lucy and Lysander were closest to the door, plotting something on a piece of paper. I wonder who she jumped last night on the drugs from Frank. I'll have to get her to tell me sometime. Judging from the fact neither of them were blushing, I was willing to bet it wasn't Lysander.

At the table set behind them, Dom, Sam, and Roxie were sitting by themselves, looking around like they were confused. Well, my sister looked less confused than Dom or Sam, but it took me a minute to realise they were missing Ly out of their trio. I wonder if James actually found the guts to do it.

Behind them, at the last table on the left, were Dylan, Al, and Scor. Scor was sporting a spectacular black eye and still bloodied knuckles. Al looked incredibly hung over and was using Dylan's shoulder as a pillow.

Rose was at the last table on the right, pouring over several books at once and taking notes with a Muggle pen on a piece of parchment. I think she's turned her club idea into a logic problem and is having a go at solving it.

Will was in the middle table on the right, his head down on the table, looking mostly dead. The final table was empty.

I had just slid open the door, when someone cleared her throat behind me. I turned around to discover Ly and James. James had his arm around her shoulders and casually, albeit pointedly, kissed the side of her head while I stared at them.

The three of us regarded each other for a moment.

"Are we back to normal?" I asked finally.

"Define normal," James suggested, playing with Ly's hair absentmindedly. I raised my eyebrow at him in amusement. He realised what he was doing and slowly retracted his hand, slightly ashamed of himself.

"Remember when we met?" I asked. "The three of us?"

"Mate, we were born two months apart and grew up practically in the same house," James pointed out.

"I mean when the three of us first became friends," I elaborated.

"On the train in my first year?" Ly asked. "When I was in the loo and the two of you were hiding from Roxie?"

"Yeah," I said. "And we were friends immediately?"

"Yeah," James and Ly said in unison.

"That type of normal," I said.

"We'd better be, because I think your dad wants us to start our actual internship in two weeks," James said.

"Learning to run a joke empire 101?" I suggested.

"Pretty much," Ly said. She and James glanced at each other out of the corner of their eyes and smiled at each other.

"If you'll just excuse me, I have to go be sick from the cuteness," I said, gesturing at them and ducking into the car.

Everyone looked up (except Al, who was genuinely asleep, and Will, who doesn't like me very much) and waved. James and Ly followed me in and sat down with Dom and Roxie and Sam. To the confusion of everyone, I sat down across from Will.

He looked up blearily and then stared at me in confusion.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I had this foolish idea I might try and talk to Lizzie," I said. "Seen her around?"

He raised his hands helplessly. "She and Em just sort of disappeared into the distance and I haven't seen them since."

"Literally or figuratively?" I asked.

"Little bit of both?" he suggested. "I think I'm not quite hung over, I think I might still be a little bit drunk from last night."

I nodded while Scor and Dylan started up a game of Exploding Snap.

"How is it we always got along when we were actually playing Quidditch, but the minute we were off the pitch we hated each other?" I asked.

"I dunno," he said. "But I wanted to kill you more times than any other person in the whole history of Hogwarts put together."

I nodded. "Yeah, that was sort of mutual."

"It's girls, mate," Will said, dragging his hands over his face like he might gouge his eyes out. "First it was because I was dating your sister."

"Yeah, that wasn't good," I agreed. I should probably kill Frank for his current intentions regarding Roxie.

No. I'm going to turn over a new leaf. That's what lost me Lizzie to begin with.

"Then you dated Em," Will said. "And I really liked Em. Really, really liked her."

"Yeah, you're still drunk," I agreed.

"I know," he said. "But I'm still telling the truth."

I nodded. "Fair enough."

"And I really, really liked Em, but you asked her out," he said. "And then Roxie and I broke up, and I wanted to go out with Em, but you were already dating her."

"Then Em and I broke up, and you did go out with her which made me hate you more," I added. "But then I got Lizzie."

It was the strangest thing that ever happened to me.

I was just sitting there in the kitchen at Malfoy Flat during the summer before sixth year. I was having ice cream. Then Lizzie came in and sat down next to me with her own ice cream.

"Fred, are you okay?" she asked.

I raised my eyebrow and glanced at her. She had the same hair as her sister, but she had chocolate brown eyes instead of green, and a sort of sad look generally, unlike Em, who just looked defiant.

"I'm fine, Lizzie," I lied.

She put her hand on my arm. It was still cold from holding the ice cream. Very slowly, as in I definitely had time to react if I wanted it, she leaned towards me and very softly kissed me. I let myself kiss her back for about twenty seconds before I put my hands on her shoulders and pushed her away. I couldn't quite bring myself to let go of her though.

"What are you doing?" I asked, shaking my head at her. "You're fourteen."

"So?" she asked defiantly, quirking her eyebrow at me.

"So I'm sixteen," I said.

She nodded. "Which means we're both under age, and two years really isn't that much of a difference."

I stared at her in confusion. "Do you like me or something?"

She gave me a look that plainly stated I was an idiot. "No, Fred, I kissed you because I think you're essentially my brother."

I realised my hands were still on her shoulders. I tried to make myself let go, but couldn't.

I nodded at her and leaned forward hesitantly, really quite unsure what the fuck I was doing. Trying not to overanalyse it, I kissed her again.

It lasted for almost a full year. I only say it's strange, me and Lizzie, because she's so…good. In ways you wouldn't expect from a Slytherin. But, she's a genuinely good person, with just a tiny edge of bitterness thrown in for good measure. Fortunately, I have my fair share of that. Then Will and I tried to kill each other and she dumped me.

"Yeah, the best part of the past few years was when I had Em," Will said, staring out the window.

"And I had Lizzie," I added. "And then they dumped us, and then you and Lizzie just _had_ to go out."

Will nodded slowly. "Yeah, want to know why?"

"Why what?" I asked.

"Why Lizzie and I dated," Will said.

"Sure," I replied. "Why not?"

"We decided that Em would probably never take me back unless she had good reason, and that you would respect Lizzie's decision not to be involved with you unless you were provoked," he said. "We figured the only people who could make the two of you jealous enough to do something about it would be me in your case, and Lizzie in Em's case."

I let this sink in for a second.

"You two were trying to make us want you again?" I asked quietly.

"Well, Lizzie and I figured you probably never stopped wanting her, but in my case, yes," he said.

I nodded slowly. "Did you sleep with her?"

"Em or Lizzie?" Will asked, clearly confused.

"Sure," I said.

"Em, yes, Lizzie, no," he said. I nodded again and stood up.

"I'm going to go talk to her," I said.

"You should," he replied. "I'm going to go to sleep."

"You do that," I said, heading out of the car. I'd made it halfway down the next car when Em burst out of a compartment and ran into me. I set her back on her feet and she dusted herself off.

"Fred," she said, sounding displeased to see me.

"What?" I asked. "You don't love me anymore?"

She fixed me with a withering glare. Then her face softened. "Did we ever say…"

"No, I don't think so," I said. "Anyways, I was looking for Lizzie."

Em pointed at the compartment she'd just exited.

"Talked to Will, lately?" I asked, edging around her towards the compartment.

"Not too recently," she replied. "Why?"

"You might want to," I suggested.

She looked somewhat chagrined. "Yeah, I know," she said. She started to walk towards the last car, then stopped. "Fred?"

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Just…don't hurt her," she said. "Because I will kill you."

I smiled at her. "Yeah, I know."

I opened the compartment door and stepped inside. Lizzie was sitting next to the window with one foot tucked under her, reading a book on Transfiguration.

"Transfiguration?" I asked, sitting down across from her.

"Will got me into it," she said without looking up. "It's going to be so strange next year, going to school without any of you lot around. I mean, who's going to throw parties in the Tower?"

"I think the torch was officially handed to Lily," I said.

She nodded, but still didn't look up. "You let me mention Will without twitching like you were going to murder him," she commented after a moment.

"Yeah, I did," I agreed. "I just talked to him."

She finally looked up from her book with a raised eyebrow. "Did you."

"Yes, I did," I said. "We had a nice heart to heart about why we hate each other, and then he filled me in on why the two of you dated."

A faint pink flush brushed across her chocolate milk coloured skin.

"Yeah, well, it was a silly plan," she said quietly.

"No worse than any other convoluted schemes any of us have come up with," I said. "I mean, fuck, look at the Whore War."

Lizzie nodded.

"I thought when you broke up with me that it was sort of final," I said quietly.

"With the exception of my mother, family is forever," she replied. "I was either going to lose Em or lose you, so I chose to break up with you instead of have a massive falling out with my sister."

I nodded. I could understand that.

"I saw what it did to your family when you and James weren't talking to each other, and the two of you aren't even brothers," she continued. "You're just cousins. I couldn't risk doing that to my family, given the fact that at the time, Uncle Draco was still all fucked up from Aunt Astoria dying, and my dad was still all bizarre over my mum, and then Scorpius is just generally fucked up, and Ly wasn't doing so well either. Em and I were pretty much the only two functional people in our entire family, and so we couldn't not talk to each other over something as stupid as our stupid boyfriends."

I nodded again. I did understand that. If I were them, I probably wouldn't have put up with me or Will for as long as they both did.

"That being said," Lizzie continued, dog earing the page in her book and setting it on the bench next to her. She stood up and sat down next to me. "I never really meant for it to be permanent."

I smiled hopefully at her. She smiled back and very softly kissed me.

She rested her head on my shoulder, and I wrapped my arm around her waist.

"You know this means you and Will have to stop trying to kill each other," she said.

"I know," I agreed.

"Good," she said. "I know you don't agree with me, but you deserve to be happy, too, Fred."

I stared out the window of the train. Lizzie nestled against me. I've done a lot of bad things. I really have. Never intentionally, though.

I glanced down at the top of Lizzie's head and figured that maybe, just this once, I could listen to someone else's opinions on the matter.

**Review!**

**Title from the Snow Patrol song "You Could Be Happy." I'm too lazy and tired right now to post the lyrics, but essentially the entire song. Something about, "You could be happy, and I won't know, but you weren't happy the day I watched you go. And all the things that I wish I had not said are played in loops 'til it's madness in my head." Those are probably horribly out of order. Anyways. Review!**


	39. 39: Where I Want to Be

**A/N: Alright! I've only got four more chapters to write and then I'm done! I'm so excited. Anyways, I hope you all like this chapter. It made me smile. And, I'd just like to say, they are one of two pairings in this ENTIRE story that have canon characters. The other is Rose and Scor. Everyone else is either my own OC or paired with an OC. But right now I'm late for work, so you won't get the next chapter for a while.**

**Chapter 39 - Where I Want to Be (Lucy)**

"Thank you, please come again," I said, putting the woman's galleons in the till.

"How's it going?" Lysander asked, wandering over from the ice cream serving station. It's really handy that the building we bought out with Uncle George's money happened to have a two bedroom flat over the shop. Of course, Ly, Roxie, and Dom got the best flat in all of Diagon Alley, but that's because they're them, and they're incredibly lucky at all times.

"We're doing excellent business," I said, glancing at the numbers on the register. "If we keep this up, we'll probably be able to pay Uncle George back in a year."

"That's pretty good, right?" Lysander asked.

I nodded. He grinned at me and went back to serving.

The bell over the door rang and Fred walked in, looking haggard.

He ordered from Lysander and made his way across the shop to me.

"How're you?" he asked me, sounding as tired as he looked.

"Better than you, apparently," I replied smoothly.

"I don't know how my dad did it alone for so many years," he said incredulously. "How the hell he managed to do research and development and marketing and sales and management all at the same time by himself…"

"He wasn't by himself," I reminded him. "He had Uncle Ron and your mum."

Fred shrugged and paid for his ice cream.

He started to make his way to the door then stopped. "Oh, Luce," he said, turning around and coming back towards me. "I kept meaning to ask you. The last day of school, last party in the Tower and everything, when you got SBF and he said it was going to make you sleep with someone, who did you end up sleeping with?"

I turned bright red and scratched the back of my head uncomfortably. "Yeah, I've sworn off drugs for a while," I said slowly.

"Who was he?" Fred asked, looking worried.

"It was Frank himself, if you must know," I said quietly, avoiding looking at Lysander, who was definitely eavesdropping.

"Damn," Fred said. "It should've been your business partner…"

We both glanced at Lysander, who turned quickly to look at something else.

"Fuck off," I said cheerfully. "Or go fuck Lizzie or something."

He grinned boyishly at me and headed for the door.

"That one's a given," he said, winking at Lysander and falling out the door.

I shook my head at him and turned back to the inventory I was working on.

Frank and I have had a few very awkward exchanges since that night, two months ago. I generally don't recommend sleeping with your friends. It really doesn't matter how good the sex is, or how drunk or drugged you were, it's just not…it's not a good situation.

As such, I have sworn off drugs for the foreseeable future.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"So…" Lysander said two nights later as we sat in our shared living room. A very large dog was passed out in the middle of the floor. He was supposed to be a prank gift from Fred, Ly, and James, since the dog can talk. They didn't tell us that when they handed him over as a happy shop opening/housewarming present. We named him Scoop, in honour of our ice cream shop.

"What?" I asked, taking a bite of the spaghetti I was eating.

We own an ice cream and sweets shop where we make all of the ice cream and sweets ourselves, and yet neither of us can really cook worth shit. At family dinners, I'm usually required to bring dessert and nothing else. The spaghetti we were having for dinner had been artfully prepared by heating up a tin of tomato sauce with a wand, and boiling a box of noodles with a wary eye cast on it the entire time. My friends think this is the funniest quirk any of us has ever shown.

"You and Frank?" he asked, raising his eyebrow and trying to look uninterested.

We made eye contact until he turned faintly pink and returned his huge grey eyes to his food. His eyes are disproportionately large, and yet somehow, on him it works. He is actually quite cute.

"No," I said slowly. "What gave you that impression?"

Scoop huffed and stood up, raising his fuzzy St Bernard eyebrows at us each in turn, before he stalked off to my room. I heard him jump up onto my bed, thanks to the characteristic squeak of the bedsprings.

"Well, you slept with him," Lysander pointed out.

"Under the influence of drugs," I added.

"Right," he said uncomfortably.

"Oh come on," I said. "I'm sure the last person you shagged was no worse than Frank."

He mumbled something and kept staring at his food.

Due to utter lack of silverware that doesn't belong to the shop, we tend to only eat food that can be consumed with chopsticks.

He dropped his at that moment and cursed under his breath as he picked them up.

"Was she really that bad?" I asked curiously, slurping up a noddle.

He cleared his throat. "I haven't slept with anyone," he said finally. "Ever. I've never had a girlfriend, I've never kissed someone, I've never done anything at all."

I blinked in shock. It hadn't even occurred to me that that was a possibility. I didn't actually think it was possible to get out of Hogwarts without snogging someone in a broom cupboard at least once.

"You've never even kissed someone?" I repeated, having issues coming to terms with that particular fact.

He shook his head.

I sighed as though I was irritated with the universe and set my bowl down on the floor next to my arm chair. He watched me in utter confusion as I took the two steps across the living room to him.

With him sitting on the sofa and me standing, I'm only two inches taller than him. I'm not particularly short, either. Well, compared to Ly, and Dom, and Roxie, who are all just shy of 5'10", I am short, but compared to normal people I'm not.

I leaned in and kissed him briefly, then turned and sat back down in my chair.

I tried to ignore the fluttering in my stomach and picked up my spaghetti again. Lysander was still staring straight ahead at the wall slightly bug-eyed.

"What was that?" he asked.

"A kiss…" I said slowly. "Because it's ridiculous that you made it out of Hogwarts and never snogged someone in a broom cupboard, so I was trying to help you out."

"Thanks?" he said, looking puzzled still.

I nodded at him.

"You're welcome," I replied. The rest of dinner passed in silence.

What did I just do?

OOooOOooOOooOO

We'd been open for almost a month, so halfway through August, when I got the strangest phone call I've ever received. I got Granddad Weasley to install a real Muggle telephone booth in the corner of our shop. One of the red ones. It actually works and everything. It's mostly there just for fun, but then it started ringing halfway through business hours.

Everyone in the shop turned and stared in confusion. I ducked out from behind the counter and slid open the door.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Excuse me, is your name Lucy Weasley?" the man on the other end asked.

"Yes…" I said slowly, wondering why on earth there was a Muggle with this phone number.

"Right, good," he said. "Well, I'm Officer Jenkins down at the Yard, and I have three people in custody who gave your phone number as their one phone call. I believe they'd like you to come and pay their bail."

"Sorry, where?" I asked in utter confusion.

"The Scotland Yard?" Officer Jenkins said. "The police station?"

I blinked in shock. "Who do you have in custody?"

"They said their names were James Potter, Fred Weasley and Lyra Malfoy," Officer Jenkins replied.

"Right," I said. "Erm…I'll be down as soon as possible."

I hung up the phone, and closed the phone booth, trying very, very hard not to laugh.

"What's up?" Lysander asked.

"Ly, James, and Fred have got themselves arrested by the Muggle police," I said, finally bursting out laughing. He didn't think it was as funny as I did. "I'll be back."

I stepped out into the Alley and apparated away.

Moments later, I was walking into the Scotland Yard.

Ly, James, and Fred smiled guiltily at me from the drunk tank.

I raised my eyebrows at them disapprovingly and paid their bail.

"Thank you," all three of them said, encapsulating me in a gigantic bear hug as we stepped out onto the street.

"You're welcome," I said. "So…explanations?"

"In a minute," James said, grabbing Ly's hand and Fred's arm. Fred grabbed my shoulder and we disapparated.

We landed in the back room of my ice cream parlour.

They followed me into the front room and ordered ice cream from Lysander, who looked hopelessly confused.

The four of us sat down at a table while they ate their ice cream. Six o'clock at night isn't our busiest time, so I figured I could get away with not standing behind the counter.

"They left us in there over night," Fred said, shuddering.

"At least they didn't put you with the hookers," Ly said, hitting him in the arm.

"No, we got the small time crack dealers," James replied. "And drunks."

"Drunk hookers," Ly countered.

"Anyways," I said. "Why were you arrested in the first place?"

"Erm…what did the officer say? Disturbing the peace?" Fred asked.

"I think he threw in drunk and disorderly," Ly added. "Even though we all passed the stupid Muggle sobriety test."

"What exactly did you do?" Lysander asked, flipping the sign on the door to closed and pulling up a chair.

"Erm…there was a goat," James said sheepishly. "And a sheep."

"There may have been a clown costume," Ly added. "On the sheep."

"The goat might have been doing the ballet with a handful of chicken," Fred mumbled.

"In the middle of a portable swamp…" Ly finished.

"In the centre of the road," James reminded them.

"Did you lot violate the International Statute of Secrecy?" Lysander demanded.

"No!" Ly said.

"We performed no magic in front of Muggles, and therefore we were fully legal," James said.

"Just not to the Muggles," Fred added.

"Are you sure you weren't drunk and disorderly?" I asked, frowning at them.

They glanced at each other.

"It sort of turns out that Firewhiskey doesn't exactly show up on Muggle breathalyzer tests," Ly said sheepishly.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," I said. "I'm sure your roommates are worried sick, Ly."

"Yeah, I know," she said. She stood up. "James, are you coming over tonight?"

James started to answer but Fred cut him off.

"We're having Man Night," Fred said, smiling evilly.

James smiled guiltily. "It's not as bad as it sounds," he said.

"I'm not bailing you two out again," I said quietly.

Fred kept smiling evilly.

"Right then," Ly said. "I suppose I'll see you at work tomorrow."

She kissed James and then headed for the door. She waved once at all of us and left.

"Man Night?" Fred prompted, holding up his hand for a high five.

"Man Night," James agreed, high fiving him. They jumped out of their chairs and ran for the door. "Thanks, Lucy!"

"I was serious about not doing it again!" I called after them as they ran down the Alley towards the WWW. "Oh, I worry."

"Your family's a little strange," Lysander said after a pause.

"I know," I agreed.

We stood up at the same time to start cleaning up the shop. We went to stack the same chair and our hands brushed against each other. We both turned faintly pink and quickly pretended it hadn't happened. We haven't had physical contact with each other since I kissed him. Nor have we mentioned the kiss.

We stepped away from each other and kept cleaning.

I think I accidentally opened a can of worms.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Alright," Lysander said. "So if we set aside a bit every month after expenses and living money, we'll be able to save up and pay back your Uncle George in no time, right?"

"Right," I said.

I lifted the box we kept our money in onto our kitchen table and emptied it with my wand.

The huge pile of gold in the middle of the table made us both stop and stare for a minute.

"Do you remember making that much?" Lysander asked quietly.

"No," I said. I recovered more quickly than he did. "Okay. So, expenses."

He read off the number, and I pulled it from the pile. It barely diminished.

I swallowed. "Living expenses?"

He read the number again and I extracted it.

The pile stayed practically the same size.

"How much do we owe your Uncle George?" Lysander asked quietly.

"986 galleons, 13 sickles, and 15 knuts," I replied in the same quiet tone.

Lysander waved his wand and the money left on the table sorted itself into nice, proper piles of ten.

The two of us stared at the table for a second.

"After expenses this month, the first month we've been open, mind, we made…" Lysander said slowly.

"1,236 galleons," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

We stared at the money for a second, then glanced at each other, then jumped out of our chairs cheering.

"We did it!" I exclaimed, hugging him.

"I know!" he exclaimed right back, bouncing on the spot.

The dog even jumped up from where he was sleeping and howled along with us, wagging his tail.

Completely ignoring the butterflies in my stomach, I let go of him, stood on my toes and kissed him.

He went stock still with the same bug-eyed expression he'd had the last time I'd kissed him.

"What was that?" he asked slowly.

"A kiss," I said.

His eyes flicked between my eyes and my lips, and then very slowly and hesitantly, he leaned down and kissed me.

So as not to spook him, I very slowly opened my mouth. He followed my lead, and lightly brushed his tongue against mine. I had to resist the urge to wrap my legs around his waist and shag him in the middle of the kitchen.

Instead I stepped back and broke the kiss.

He looked somewhat confused and vulnerable and his lips were slightly abused looking.

I managed to keep myself from grabbing him by the trousers. Instead, I let my hand slide down from his shoulder to grab his hand.

"You know, for never having done anything, you're certainly not a bad kisser," I said, trying to control my breathing. It wasn't particularly easy.

He shrugged noncommittally. "Ravenclaw," he said dismissively. "Fast learner…"

I nodded and pulled him out of the kitchen and down the hall. He pushed the door shut behind us.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"How in the name of Merlin did I manage to get out of Hogwarts without ever doing that?" he asked, his breathing slowly returning to normal.

I laughed breathlessly and placed a kiss on his chest.

"That was my initial reaction," I said, snuggling closer to him.

We lay there for a minute in silence with our legs tangled together.

"So," he started, sounding slightly nervous. "Is – is this going to be a – a thing? Or is this just because we get to pay off all our debts after only one month?"

"All our debts and then some," I reminded him.

"Right," he said, quietly. "So, it's that one then?"

I frowned at him. "No," I said. "No it's not that one."

"Really?" he asked, looking hopeful. I smiled at him and kissed him again.

"Really," I said, playing with his hair.

He grinned and kissed me enthusiastically.

"But, we do have to get up at six in the morning to open our store again, so I'm going to sleep," I said, using him as a pillow.

"Right," he said.

"Good night," I said, kissing his chest again.

I felt him smile. "Night."

**Review!**

**Title, "Where I Want to Be" by the Dangerous Summer. "And there is something in your face that pulls me far enough away. I guess I always knew that I'd find you." **


	40. 40: 7 Minutes in Heaven

**A/N: So this is the longest chapter I've written in a while. Anyways, there's one more chapter and then it's the conclusion of the Whore War. I promise. Anyways, I hope you all like this chapter. I like this chapter. Of course, I sort of like this story a lot, which sounds conceited, but it's really fun to fuck with people's lives. Anywhoodles, please review. I like those too.**

**Chapter 40 - 7 Minutes in Heaven (Will)**

I don't want to go to work. I don't like having a job even though I've been out of school for two months. I don't know how Lucy and Lysander do it, having a full time job already. Well, it probably helps that when they close shop for the day, they just get to shag and don't have to do anything else.

And then Fred, and Ly, and James all have jobs too, full time. In training for a career. Like, an actual career. What is that?

Dom's got her Quidditch training and apparates to Wales every other day. Frank and Roxie have become Rose's minions and are helping her get the club ready to open at the end of the month. Dylan and Scor have jobs at the Prophet already and are happy as fuck about it. Al's started his apprenticeship at Mungo's to learn to be a Healer. Em's got a job in the Ministry as someone's assistant in the human rights sector or something.

Sam and I are the only two who don't have jobs that are related to our eventual plans. It doesn't really help that neither of us have eventual plans, but still.

"Well, why don't you just…I dunno, go pro in Quidditch or something?" Sam suggested, charming our teapot to automatically pour the water when it was boiled.

"I think I'd get sick of it eventually," I said. "I suppose I could try. What about you? Why don't you just go put Professor MacMillan out of a job?"

"Because that would be mean," he replied. "And because I turned eighteen in May. I am nowhere near old enough to teach."

"We're just sort of fucked generally, aren't we?" I asked.

"And literally," Sam added, grinning cheerily.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, shut up," I grumbled.

"You could just tell Em that you love her," he suggested.

"Yes, but that would necessitate sucking up my pride," I said. "Since she dumped me, and therein I would technically be grovelling and begging."

"I'm just saying that honesty works wonders in these situations," Sam said.

"Yeah, for you, maybe," I said. "She hasn't spoken to me since July, and according to both Lizzie and Fred, she knows anyways."

Sam shrugged apologetically. "Maybe she's just mad at you?"

"For what?" I demanded, pulling myself off the floor and glaring at him.

"Dating her sister? Being conceited? Spending all your time shelving books at Flourish and Blotts?" Sam offered.

"It's probably the sister thing," I said. "But since she's talked to both Fred and Lizzie, she knows it was just to get her back."

"It's probably the conceited thing," Sam replied. Some best friend he is.

"What would you do if Dom asked you if a dress made her look fat?" I asked incredulously.

"Tell her," Sam said slowly, apparently unsure what I was asking. "Not that any particular garment of anything could actually make her look fat…"

"Yeah, there is that," I conceded.

"We're going to be late for work," Sam added.

"I know," I said, standing up and pulling him off the floor. Our flat is very small, in Muggle London, and both of us are broke, so we sort of have two pieces of furniture. His bed, and mine. My parents believe that one must pull oneself up by ones bootstraps, even if just to hang oneself with them, and Sam's are Muggles and apparently don't understand that wizards still need to pay rent.

We apparated into Diagon Alley and walked into Flourish and Blotts. The most interesting thing that's happened to either of us since we got out of Hogwarts was the fact I was published in _Transfiguration Today_ (again) and Sam was published in _Challenges in Charming._ However, that just contributes to our accrued nerdiness. Neither of us are particularly good catches. Of course, the last time I said that, Dom slapped me and then dragged Sam off into her bedroom.

"Corner, Baker!" our boss exclaimed, bustling over to us. He's a short, sort of dumpy man, with a shiny bald spot on his head the size of a galleon.

"Yes, sir?" I asked.

"They sent mail here," he grumbled, handing us two letters. Sam and I exchanged looks of utter confusion. "Something about sending owl post to Muggle London. Why do you two live in Muggle London?"

"Because we don't make living wages?" Sam suggested.

I covered my eyes in despair while our boss turned slowly red.

"He has a problem with honesty, sir," I said, trying to save Sam's ass. "Just ignore him. He doesn't have a filter."

"Maybe you could transfigure him one," the boss said, before he bustled away.

I waited until he was out of earshot and turned to face Sam. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Well, we don't," Sam said dismissively, opening his letter. He stared at it in confusion.

"What?" I asked.

He didn't say anything, so I opened mine.

_Dear Mr Corner,_

_Having read the most recent issue of _Transfiguration Today_, I was delighted by your article on Animagi and their potential in security settings. As the current director of magical security for both the Ministry of Magic (which is where both your parents work, unless I am very much mistaken) and Azkaban Prison, I feel somewhat remiss about informing you that we have a security problem. The problem lies with the Animagi you seem to know so much about. I do know that you yourself are one, and due to your aptitude in transfiguration, I thought that perhaps you would be able to come up with a solution to my problem. You would, of course, be handsomely rewarded for your efforts. _

_It has come to my attention that you and Samuel Baker keep correspondence, and after reading his article in _Challenges in Charming_, I contacted Professor Ernie MacMillan at Hogwarts School to learn more about Mr Baker's charming skills. I had hoped that perhaps the two of you together might be able to come up with a feasible solution to preventing Animagi from entering to either the Ministry or Azkaban undetected. _

_Thank you for your time,_

_Chauncey Dupres. _

I looked up from the letter at Sam. He met my eye with the same confused expression.

"Really?" he asked finally.

I shrugged. "It'd be a fun challenge."

"Yeah, I suppose," Sam said. "Well, it'd be a variation on an apparation ward almost…"

"But you'd have to have the specifics about Animagi in order to prevent against that," I added.

"Boys, the new inventory isn't going to sort itself!" our boss called from the back of the store. Sam and I pocketed our letters and headed into the back room.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Two days later found us in the middle of our living room (it's a wooden floor with a fireplace in the corner for Floo purposes) with stacks of Transfiguration and Charms books, in addition to our own notebooks.

"So, he's going to pay us," I said. "And then if we throw in a patent?"

"Depends on how successful it is," Sam said, staring at his charms notebook.

I told Dom what we were doing, and she seemed to understand that that was why Sam had stopped talking to anyone for the foreseeable future. It was a little disconcerting that he was talking to me, even, while working on a Charms problem, but I figured it was because he needed my Transfiguration skills to do it.

"It's going to be bloody complicated," Sam muttered.

"Sam, you figured out how to do a Summoning Charm in third year without studying it," I pointed out. "I became an Animagus fully after less than a year of practise, which is very unheard of. I think we can do it."

"I mean actually performing the ward," Sam said. "You'd need five people at least to pull it off."

"Or two very powerful and skilled people," I countered, pulling out my wand.

Sam looked at me for a second, then pulled out his own wand.

We pointed our wands jointly at the kitchen and chanted the incantation we'd come up with. A soft, fuzzy yellow ward spread over the kitchen door.

"Alright," Sam said. He stood up. "Test number one?"

"Go ahead," I said. He nodded shakily and walked through the kitchen door. He was silent. "Sam?"

"I'm fine," he said. "Nothing happened to me."

"Good," I said. I stood up and faced the door. I took a deep breath and walked through the door.

"Fuck," Sam said when I arrived in the kitchen unscathed.

"Yeah," I agreed. "But, in the charm's defence, I am in human form. So that's probably a good thing."

"Right," Sam said.

I walked back out of the kitchen and turned into a dog. I walked to the door again, my claws tick-tacking on the wooden floors. I sniffed the ward. It smelled like lemon and vanilla. What the fuck?

I leaned too close and my nose touched the ward. It blasted me halfway across the room, turning me human in the process.

"Well, that worked," I said, blinking in shock as I rubbed the back of my head where I'd hit it on the wall.

"Fuck, mate, are you okay?" Sam asked, running out of the kitchen.

"Yeah," I said, rubbing my head again. "Why does the ward smell like lemon and vanilla?"

"I dunno," Sam said. He thought about it for a second. "That's what Dom's shampoo smells like."

I gave him a mildly disgusted look. "That's sad."

"I didn't do it on purpose!" he insisted.

I rolled my eyes and approached the ward with caution. It wasn't exactly a pleasant sensation to be forced back into my human body with no warning.

In human form, I walked into the kitchen. "Okay, so both those things are good," I said. Sam joined me in the kitchen. "I wonder if I can transform in here."

Sam shrugged.

I transformed. We stared at each other, man to dog.

"We should probably fix that," Sam said. I barked in confirmation and turned back into myself.

OOooOOooOOooOO

It took us another two days to figure out how to theoretically prevent me from changing inside the ward. We cast the spell again and tested it. We could both walk into the kitchen as humans.

I tried to transform, and succeeded, but when I opened my eyes, I was back in the living room.

"So it just throws you out right now, instead of just not letting you transform," Sam said, noting it down.

"Which is definitely good enough for security purposes at the Ministry, except it would be a cheap way out for criminals in Azkaban," I said. "So if we tweak it…"

I scribbled something in Sam's notebook. At first he looked indignant that I'd dared touch his precious notebook, then he looked at what I'd written.

"That would do it," he said. "It'd prevent you from changing. But…"

"But even the slightest fuck up in casting the ward and any Animagus would probably explode if they tried to change," I finished.

"Well, not explode, per se, just sort of…"

"Be fucked," I said.

"Yeah," he agreed. "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah," I said. "We could use that money."

"True," he said. "Alright."

We pointed our wands at the kitchen and cast the modifications.

We walked in together, proving that it wouldn't keep an un-transformed Animagus out.

"Ready?" Sam asked.

"Did you cast your part right?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered honestly. As always. "Did you?"

"I think so," I said. "Which should be comforting, because if this kills me, at least we know it's my own damn fault, right?"

"Uh huh," Sam said, looking nervous.

I took a breath. "Hey, Sam, if I die," I said. I wouldn't be saying anything, except it's actually a very real possibility. Fucking around with untested magic is never really a good idea, but unfortunately, we have to test it somehow.

"What?" he asked.

"If I die…"

Tell Em I'm sorry. Tell her I love her.

I glanced around the hideous kitchen.

"If I die, find a better fucking apartment," I said, tapping into the source of my magic that would let me turn into a dog.

I was paralysed almost instantly.

"Hey, it stopped you!" Sam exclaimed excitedly. "We did it!"

I felt, more than heard the disturbing crunching noise at the base of my skull. And saw the black spots start to form in front of my eyes because I couldn't breathe.

"Will?" Sam asked.

The last thing I heard before I blacked out was him cursing loudly.

OOooOOooOOooOO

Wherever I was happened to be white and sterile looking.

Fuck.

I'm dead, aren't I?

And the only thing I told Sam was to get a better apartment. I didn't tell him to tell Em I love her. Fuck.

To my utter surprise, my chest was rising and falling like I was breathing. I didn't expect to still breathe once I was dead. I wiggled the fingers of my right hand. They felt completely fine. I went to move the ones on my left hand, but couldn't. That sucks. I wonder why that is.

I managed to lift my head enough to see my left hand. It took almost all of my strength to do just that.

To my utter shock, the reason I couldn't move my left fingers was because they were interlaced with someone else's. And pinned under that person's head. I blinked in confusion.

"Em?" I asked slowly. My voice sounded hoarse and unused.

She jumped awake and lifted her head off our intertwined hands.

"You're awake!" she gasped, letting go of my hand and wrapping her arms around me. Uncertainly, I put my arms around her as well.

"Really?" I asked. "I sort of thought I was dead."

She laughed a little, but sounded like she was crying as well. I stroked her hair, barely noticing how much energy it took.

She broke out of my grasp and kissed me. I realised as she did that she actually was crying.

"I'm fine," I said, brushing her hair behind her ear. It occurred to me that I actually wasn't the moment I said it, but I was at the very least still alive.

"But what if you had died and then I wouldn't have got to tell you-" She stopped talking long enough to kiss me again.

"You don't have to sit in that chair, you know," I said softly, running my hand along her back to try and calm her down. She was slightly hysterical.

She nodded and sniffed before she climbed all the way onto the bed I was lying in. I really wonder where I am. Probably Mungo's.

She lay across my chest and kissed me again.

"I was just so scared you were going to die and I wasn't going to get to tell you I love you," she mumbled.

"Well, I'm not dead," I said. "And I'm all ears."

She hit me lightly in the chest and I laughed. She laughed too, although she sounded like she might cry again.

"I love you," I said as earnestly as I could. "I never stopped."

"I know," she said.

"What? That's all I get?" I asked indignantly. "Just an 'I know'?"

She smiled and kissed me again.

"I love you too," she said, kissing me and slipping her tongue into my mouth. Without my telling them to, my hands slid down her back towards her arse.

Of course, that would be the moment when someone walked in the room.

"Oi!" said a clearly shocked voice from the doorway. "The fuck do you two think you're doing?"

Em stopped kissing me and we both turned slowly to look at the door. Al was standing there with a clipboard looking scandalised.

"Sup," I said awkwardly.

"Look, I'm glad he's awake and everything, but for the love of Merlin's nutsack, the boy's barely got enough strength to lift his own damned head, and let's not even talk about his blood flow," Al ranted. "You are not helping."

"I beg to differ," I said. "It's helping quite a lot."

"You would think that," Al grumbled. "Em, get the fuck off the bed."

"Yeah, I'd really rather she didn't," I said tersely. "That could be very awkward for all three of us."

Em looked somewhat amused. Al looked slightly disgusted.

"Apparently your blood flow is better than I gave you credit for," he said. "You're well on your way to full health. However, we did share a dorm room at Hogwarts for seven years and, as much as it pains me to say it, it's nothing I haven't seen before. So, Em, kindly get the fuck off the bed."

"Sure, Healer Potter," Em said flippantly, climbing off me and back into the chair. I was instantly much colder and much more exposed.

"Healer Potter? How long have I been asleep?" I asked. "And would one of you hand me a spare pillow? I really would not want my mother to walk in and see me right now."

"Yeah," Em agreed, handing me a spare pillow. I placed it over my lap as discretely as possible.

"I'm not actually a Healer yet," Al said. "You've only been asleep for a week."

I blinked in shock. "A week?"

"They weren't sure you were going to make it," Em said, returning to her somewhat weepy state.

"Well, I did," I said. "Am I allowed to sit up?"

Al consulted his clipboard. "Yeah, I suppose."

I pushed myself into a sitting position and readjusted my pillow.

"Ah, Mr Corner," said a completely unfamiliar voice from the door. I looked up to see yet another Healer with light blue robes and another clipboard. "Feeling alive, are we?"

"Yeah," I said uncertainly. "Sort of."

"Right," the Healer said. "And would you mind explaining to me what exactly you did to yourself?"

"Do you have a high understanding of complex antipersonnel wards, Transfiguration, Charms, and also the magic used to become and Animagus?" I asked.

"No," the Healer said slowly.

"Then I can't explain exactly what I did to myself," I said cheerfully. "I could give you the cliff notes version."

"Please do," the Healer said. "The chap who brought you in asked me the same question about advanced magic and then…"

"Used advanced explanations?" I guessed.

"Yeah," the Healer said.

"Right," I said. "Well, we were working on a ward that would prevent an Animagus from transforming inside it and also keep a transformed Animagus out. Anyways, it was supposed to be performed by at minimum five wizards for safety's sake, but we, well I, decided we could probably pull it off just the two of us. And it was all fine until the very last bit, the transforming inside the wards bit, and I might have accidentally not quite done my part right, and then I tried to transform and…and now I'm here and it's a week later."

The Healer nodded slowly. "See, I would be giving you a lecture about experimental magic, except I've already been talked to by Chauncey Dupres, the director of security for both the Ministry and Azkaban, who informed me you were working on a project for him."

I smiled sheepishly.

The Healer gave us a look that said something like, "Oh, you kids."

"This young lady has been refusing point blank to leave your bedside," he added. He looked slightly amused. "May I ask when the ceremony is?"

I managed to keep a poker face on while Em turned bright red.

"We, erm, we haven't picked a date," Em said.

"Mm," the Healer said, like this was normal and like I had some idea what the fuck was going on. "Well, Mr Corner, if you're sure you're all right, I'll leave my apprentice to do some tests and then let you and your fiancé go home."

"Thanks," I said, trying to keep the half amused, half desperately confused look off my face.

"Oh to be young," the Healer said whimsically, heading for the door.

"Erm, excuse me, Healer-"

Healer whatever-the-fuck-your-name-is.

"O'Connell," Em whispered.

"Excuse me Healer O'Connell," I called after him. He paused in the doorway and looked back. "I think the next thing you and your apprentice should work on is bedside manner."

Healer O'Connell laughed good naturedly and clapped Al on the shoulder before he walked out of the room and closed the door.

There was a moment of silence while Em looked embarrassed and Al stared at his feet.

"Fiancé?" I asked finally. "I was asleep a lot longer than a week."

"No you weren't," Al said.

"Well, I like to think I'd actually remember proposing," I said.

Al scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.

"It was Al's idea," Em said somewhat abashedly. "They weren't going to let me stay unless I was family, so he told them we were engaged."

"Sorry," Al said.

"No, no it's fine," I said. "But you get to pay for the wedding."

Em laughed.

"I can live with that," Al said. He waved his wand at me. I shuddered involuntarily. "Well, you're healthy enough to go home."

"If he goes back to his flat he might die," Em said.

"Why?" Al asked. I nodded in agreement with him.

"Because all you've got for furniture is your bed, and you literally cannot go into your kitchen," Em said.

"Why not?" I asked. "The ward won't keep me out if I'm not transformed."

"Sam had to tamper with it to get you out of the kitchen," Em said. "And then one of the Ministry people who came to inspect it happened to be an Animagus and tried to go in, only to have it blast him through the wall."

I winced. "Did he get it to work in entirety?" I asked.

"Yeah," Em said. "He had the Ministry wizards cast it as a test."

"And?" I prompted.

"Dupres liked it," she said slowly.

"And?" I insisted.

She smiled at me. "Sam, the last time he was here, said something excitable about never having to work again?"

"As in I could be a Transfiguration nerd for the rest of my life and never actually have to earn money off it?" I asked.

"I believe so," Em agreed. I smiled.

"Well, that's all very nice, but if he can't go back to his flat, where do you propose you put him for his two weeks of bed rest?" Al asked from the corner.

"Two weeks?" I asked in horror.

"Be thankful it isn't longer," Al said.

"I'll take him," Em said, smiling at me. "If that's okay with you."

"Fine by me," I said.

"Well, fine, but bed _rest_," Al said while Em helped me stagger out of the hospital bed and put on clothes. "This is not a prescription for two weeks of sex."

"No," I agreed. "That's what the honeymoon you're paying for is."

Em laughed and helped me limp to the door. I definitely understand why I'm supposed to spend two weeks in bed not moving. Whatever I did to myself certainly made me weak.

"I – I can't tell if you're serious or not," Al said finally.

I waggled my eyebrows at him and let Em apparate me back to her flat. We landed in her room. As gently as possible, she helped me lie down on her bed.

"Are you comfortable?" she asked, sitting on the bed next to me and fluffing the pillows under my head.

I shrugged. "As good as it's going to get, I think."

She kissed me softly. "Do you know what would be funny?" she asked, resting her head on my chest. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders.

"What?" I asked.

"To make Al actually pay for our wedding if we got married," she said, her eyes fluttering shut.

I smiled and let my eyes close. "When we do, I'll be sure to tell him that," I said, starting to drift off. Amazing I can still be tired after sleeping for a week. Although, technically, that was a coma.

"When?" Em asked, sounding as half-asleep as I was. "You sound awfully sure of yourself."

"Let's not kid ourselves," I mumbled. "I'm horribly conceited."

"At least you have reason to be," she replied, yawning.

I smiled once and fell asleep.

**Review!**

**Title from the Fall Out Boy song, 7 Minutes in Heaven - "I keep telling myself, I keep telling myself I'm not the desperate type. Sitting out dances on the wall, trying to forget everything that isn't you. I'm not going home alone, because I don't do too well on my own." **


	41. 41: 4ever

**A/N: Alright. Two more chapters left, and yes, both of them are involved in the Whore War. Don't worry. **

**WARNING - Sex! I know I've said that before and not actually meant it, but I really actually mean it this time. Not just implied either. However, bear with me, this is the first time I've tried to actually write the sex part of a sex scene, and it could very possibly be crap. However, I tried to make it not be porn. You'll all have to tell me how I did. **

**Chapter 41 - 4ever (Roxie)**

"So, we're officially open tomorrow," Rose said, pacing the middle of the dance floor in her stilettos and pencil skirt. She kept tapping a pencil on her clipboard as she paced. "Alright. So we've got…" She got quieter until I could only catch the occasional word. I caught the words, "alcohol," "food," "entertainment," "lighting." Then she actually trailed off and I couldn't hear her anymore.

"She normally like this?" Frank asked, leaning on the bar and spinning in one of the bar stools.

I shrugged noncommittally.

"She hasn't been for a while," Molly said, leaning on the other side of the bar. "She was like this when we were all kids for a bit. Wasn't she, Rox?"

"Yeah, I suppose," I said. "Frank, you sure you're going to be able to keep tabs on all of the different people ordering drinks?"

Frank gave me a pointedly irritated look.

"Babe," he said. "I learned how to bartend at the Leaky Cauldron and learned how to keep tabs selling drugs. A night club is nothing."

Molly and I laughed.

"And parties at the Tower would've been so much better if we'd just had food," Rose said, her volume picking back up. "Thanks, Molly."

Molly nodded, her curly red hair flying everywhere.

"It's a regular family affair," I said.

"And then me," Frank pointed out.

"You're family," Molly reprimanded. She takes after Grandma Weasley so extremely. Uncle Percy did a proper job naming her after Grandma.

Frank thought about it for a minute then shuddered. "I'd rather not be."

"Why not?" Molly asked.

"At least not by general induction," Frank amended, drinking some of his Butterbeer.

"Molly, how's the kitchen look?" Rose asked, ducking around behind the bar nervously.

We've checked everything at least thirty times over the past three days, and yet, Rose is insisting we check again.

"Fully stocked and ready to go," Molly said.

"Thanks for agreeing to work here," Rose said.

"Well, after you got rid of that tosspot for me, it was the least I could do," Molly said drily. Rose looked slightly guilty. "No, I'm serious. Thank you. Maybe not the best method, but still."

Apparently, when Rose slept with Molly's boyfriend in fifth year, it was because he'd already hit on Lily and Victoire and then Rose. Rose actually slept with him so that the family would throw him out. Pretty decent strategy in my opinion.

"Any chance you want to tell your sister that?" Rose asked quietly, looking slightly dejected.

"Why? What's she done now?" Molly asked.

"Lucy still won't talk to you, huh?" I asked.

Frank looked hopelessly uncomfortable at the mention of Lucy. I raised my eyebrow at him. He shook his head at me and then grabbed Rose by the arm.

"You need to chill," he said, pulling her onto the dance floor. Rose laughed. "Roxie, can we get some music?"

"Yes, you can," I said, making my way to the stage we had set up for live entertainment. In addition to me, Rose (and Frank, and Molly, and I) had decided it would be great to invite established musicians to play here as well.

For now, the only thing we had up was a grand piano. I reacquainted my fingers with the keys for a second. I started in on a song and watched Frank spin Rose around the room. Rose was finally relaxing, which was definitely for the best. I watched Frank as he danced with Rose. His bright blue eyes (courtesy of his mother) lit up, and his dark brown hair (from his dad) kept falling in his eyes. He glanced over at me and saw me watching him. He smiled at me. I smiled back and kept singing.

"I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited, but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it. I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded that for me it isn't over. Never mind I'll find someone like you," I sang. "I wish nothing but the best for you too. Don't forget me, I beg. I remember you said, 'sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.'"

Frank glanced at me again and spun Rose around. Rose glanced between us and smiled a knowing smile. I'm not sure I like that look.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I finally got home at eight o'clock. I know that every night once the club's open, I'll get home at two in the morning, if not later, but still. For setting up, eight is late. And then tomorrow, I have to start as the hostess, since we're not going to do live music yet. Just a wireless. But I don't particularly mind. I think it'll be sort of fun to be the hostess.

As I walked in, pulled my shoes off, and collapsed on the sofa, Dom and Ly appeared out of the back of the flat.

"You're home late," Ly commented.

"Get used to it," I said, closing my eyes. Then I thought about what I'd just seen and opened my eyes again. They were both dressed up and looked scarily similar. Of course, Dom's just dyed her hair, so they looked less identical than normal, but still. She tried to dye it Weasley red, but the Veela silver didn't exactly take that lying down, and now it's sort of an awesome molten cherry colour. Sam got all giddy when he saw it and started mumbling about charming things different colours permanently and pulled out his notebook. He kept playing with her hair with his left hand while he scribbled with his right. He somehow managed to charm his notebook so it holds itself steady at whatever height he needs it to be. It was a very funny night.

"Where on earth are you two going?" I asked curiously.

"Muggle restaurant," Ly said.

"Remember the last time you went into Muggle London?" I asked. "Remember how Lucy had to come bail you three out of jail?"

"We're going to a restaurant," Dom said. "And Sam and I will be there, and Fred won't, so they can't get up to anything."

"You guys are going on a double date?" I asked amusedly.

They nodded. "If you had a boyfriend, it could be a triple date," Ly said.

"Mm," I agreed. "Yeah. I'll just stay here with the cats."

Ly's cat, Blair, chose that moment to jump onto the sofa and curl up on my stomach. He kneeded at my stomach and then stared at me judgementally.

"Don't look at me like that," I said.

"I'm sure you'll have fun with the cats," Dom said like she was trying not to laugh.

"Thanks," I said. They waved at me and walked out of the flat.

I closed my eyes and fell asleep almost instantly.

OOooOOooOOooOO

The club was a smashing success. To say the least. It was only ten and we were packed almost to capacity. From my spot at the door, I could see Rose on the dance floor mingling with people, making sure everything was going smoothly. I could see Frank behind the bar, mixing drinks as fast as he could. I couldn't see Molly, since she was in the kitchen, but I saw the food come out of it.

Everyone had put in an appearance too. Ly and James were on the dance floor being adorable. Sam and Dom were at a table, since Dom was tired from Quidditch practice. They were sharing the table with Will and Em, who I was actively shocked to see. Will had even managed a weak smile when they walked in. According to Al, (who was currently having his way with Dylan in a broom cupboard while very, very drunk) Will is still supposed to be on bed rest, but according to Em and Will, he's well enough to sit at a table in a club for a few hours.

Scor was around somewhere, probably drinking. Lucy and Lysander were dancing together near Ly and James, which I was glad to see. Lucy has had enough experience with dishonourable things (alcohol, drugs, Scorpius…) that she could use someone firmly attached to this reality. Lysander, on the other hand, is a bit too firmly attached to this reality, so it was probably good for him to have someone as crazy as Lucy.

My brother was lurking at the bar unhappily, since Lizzie had to go back to Hogwarts today.

By the time it rolled around to one thirty, which is when we close the doors to newcomers and I get to officially be done for the night, Will, Em, Sam and Dom had all gone home. Fred was still sitting at the bar drinking though. I frowned at him and made my way over in time to hear Frank arguing with some bloke.

"No, you can't actually send a drink to the hostess," Frank said.

"Why not?" the guy asked indignantly.

"Because she's working," Frank said.

"So?" the guy asked. He wasn't particularly cute, so I didn't really mind that Frank was preventing him from hitting on me.

"And because she's got a big, jealous boyfriend who'll kick the shit out of you if he finds out," Frank added.

The guy seemed to consider this a fair reason, because he buggered off. I raised my eyebrow at Frank and sat down next to Fred.

"Heya sis," Fred slurred, draping his arm around my shoulder.

"You know that now the guy over there is going to think you're my big, jealous boyfriend, right?" I asked calmly.

Fred's face contorted in disgust and he looked like he was collapsing inwards on himself while his brown skin turned faintly green.

"Ima be sick," he decided, dashing for the bathroom.

I laughed.

"So, can I get you a drink?" Frank asked, leaning against the bar in the classic bartender's pose. His hands were flat against the bar, spread far apart, one shoulder shrugged into his ear, the other draped with a bar towel.

"Rose really made you clean up, didn't she?" I asked, giving him a pointed once over. He was wearing black slacks which were more formal than anything I'd ever seen him wear, and a black button down shirt that was actually tucked in. The only thing that wasn't black was his silver tie.

"She forbade me from wearing anything that promoted horticulture," he said. "I tried to reason with her that my dad's the Herbology professor, but she was having none of it."

"What? You wanted to wear the magical mushrooms shirt?" I asked. He has a shirt that says something like, "Herbology: Bringing you magical mushrooms since 3500 BC."

"Maybe," he admitted. "But about that drink?"

"I dunno," I said. "I think my big jealous boyfriend might have an issue with that."

"Don't you need a big jealous boyfriend for that first?" he asked, leaning slightly further across the counter.

"Probably," I admitted. "Any chance you've got a drink that'd make a big talking bartender live up to his words?"

"Depends on the words," he said, raising his eyebrow at me suggestively.

"Better come up with some good ones then," I suggested, leaning towards him. "Since sleeping with your co-workers is wrong." I flicked my eyes down at his lips and back a few times. His lips were slightly parted and looked quite inviting. We were almost touching when I pulled back sharply. He caught himself before he fell forward.

"I'm going to go dance," I said. "See you around, Frank."

I stood up and danced away.

"That was cold," he called after me. I winked at him and disappeared into the crowd.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Besides. Sleeping with your co-workers is just wrong."

"I agree entirely."

"Not to mention your brother's flatmate."

"Just horrible."

"Or someone you've known your whole life."

"You talk too much."

"I know," I said, dragging his bottom lip between my teeth. "Habit of being raised around two older boys who never shut up."

"I'm so sorry," he said, unbuttoning my dress.

I undid his tie and then used it to pull him down to my height and kiss him. He stopped unbuttoning my dress long enough to pass his hands under it and momentarily fondle my breasts. My breath hitched in my throat.

Without warning, he let go of me entirely and stepped back.

"You know, you're right," he said. "It's just wrong to sleep with your co-workers."

He actually started to walk towards his own bedroom door.

"Excuse me?" I asked in the deadliest voice I could muster. He stopped. "Frank, get your ass back over here now."

When he turned around, he was smirking to himself. It took him two steps to get back to me.

"Why should I?" he asked, smirking petulantly at me.

"So we can truly experience just how wrong it is," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck and standing on my toes to kiss him, having already removed my high heels.

"Flirt," he accused, kissing down the side of my neck.

"Tease," I retorted, shivering slightly in the cold air that was now touching my entire body except for the interesting bits. My dress lay on the floor at my feet.

"Cold, or happy to see me?" he asked, pressing his lips to my skin just above the lace of my bra.

"Both, actually," I said, running my fingers through his hair and forcing him to straighten back up so I could kiss him again. "Of course, you wouldn't know how cold it is, since you're still wearing clothes."

"How silly of me," he replied, running his tongue along my bottom lip. I met it with my own and held onto his shoulders to pull him closer. He unbuttoned his own shirt deftly and I pushed it to the floor. I kissed his jaw and then the hollow of his throat and left a hickey where his neck met his shoulder.

"Hey, I have to go to work tomorrow and explain that," he said somewhat indignantly.

"Co-workers," I said dismissively, unbuckling his belt and undoing his trousers.

"Just wrong," he agreed, sliding his hands under the elastic at my hips. Refusing to let myself be naked before him, I pulled his trousers and boxers down at the same time. He groaned when I kissed his thigh on the way back up.

"You're right," he said hoarsely. "It is cold."

"I know, right?" I replied, putting my hands on his waist and kissing him again. He slid his hands down to my hips again, this time succeeding in pulling off my underwear. I pushed him back onto the bed and knelt over him on my hands and knees. He reached up and buried one hand in my hair so he could kiss me, and used the other to unclasp my bra. I flung it away.

He kissed down my throat again and gently bit a patch of my newly exposed skin, almost certainly leaving a hickey.

"Hey," I said, attempting indignation. "I have to go to work tomorrow and explain that."

"Babe, if our co-workers can see that particular spot, you'll have more to explain than just the hickey," he replied, his voice slightly deeper than normal.

I laughed breathlessly as he pressed his fingers against the back of my knee and flipped us over. Almost automatically, the leg he wasn't holding wrapped around his waist. I moaned as he pressed into me.

"Frank," I heard myself say.

"Yes, Roxie?" he replied, continuing to brush his lips against my chest. He hiked my leg higher.

"Don't stop," I gasped. He smiled against my breast.

"Wouldn't dream of it," he groaned back, picking up his pace.

Moments later, my toes curled and a guttural noise of pleasure tore out of my throat as all the muscles in my body relaxed at precisely the same moment.

Frank followed seconds after me, collapsing on top of me with his face pressed between my breasts.

"Sleeping with co-workers," I managed to say after a moment.

"Just…wrong…" he panted, his fingers gently tracing the curve of my waist.

I nodded, running my hands through his hair.

"So wrong," I agreed.

He smiled and he closed his eyes. "Maybe just so wrong it's right…"

**Review!  
><strong>**Just saying, but this was so not where I thought this chapter was going to go when I started writing it...**

**Title: 4ever by the Veronicas. "Come on baby we ain't gonna live forever, let me show you all the things that we could do. You know you want to be together, and I want to spend the night with you." **


	42. 42: All the Best Cowboys

**A/N: So, yeah. There's one more chapter after this. And I think I'm going to do an epilogue, but I have no idea who should narrate it. I'm accepting opinions. **

**Chapter 42 - All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues**

"What the fuck, mate?" James asked, staring at me in utter confusion.

He looked supremely uncomfortable. Probably had something to do with the fact he was only wearing my sister's dressing gown.

The moment was made all the more awkward by Roxie walking through the door on her tiptoes with her shoes in her hand and spectacular sex hair.

"It's six in the morning," James said slowly, glancing at me and then Roxie.

As if to confirm this fact, Sam wandered out of a back room into the kitchen and flipped on the coffee machine. He scratched the back of his head and stretched, turning on the spot to see the three of us looking at him.

"Every single person who lives in this flat got laid last night?" I speculated, fighting the amused look on my face.

"You don't live here," Sam said, staring at me.

"Neither do you, mate," I reminded him.

He opened his mouth to argue for a second, then nodded in agreement. "The Ministry repossessed my flat."

"We know," James said, holding Ly's robe more closed and looking awkward.

"Why are you here?" Roxie asked me, edging around me and into the flat, presumably so she could pretend she had actually slept here.

"I was actually hoping to talk to my sister," I said calmly, revelling slightly in the discomfort I was causing. I figured Roxie would probably have been uncomfortable no matter who she ran into while doing her walk of shame. James just looked awkward since he was wearing my sister's clothes, and, well, actually, Sam wasn't awkward. He was just confused.

"She's asleep," James said. "Do you lot feel the draft?"

"No, because the rest of us actually have trousers on," I said cheerfully. James gave me a sour look and shuffled off down the hall. "So, Roxie, where did you just slink in from?"

She mumbled something and scratched the back of her head uncomfortably. In doing so, she seemed to realise her hair was less than artfully dishevelled.

"Sorry, didn't catch that," I said.

"I just slunk in from Frank's, if you must know," Roxie said, holding her chin high and displaying Gryffindor courage.

"See? Was that so hard?" I asked, slightly amused by the fact she was sleeping with Frank.

"Some things were," she said, raising her eyebrow at me.

"Insinuation is a dirty thing, Roxie," I said.

"Says the whore," she retorted.

"Whores get paid," I replied. "I suppose if I am a whore, then I am at the very least a charitable one, donating my services for free."

"And there's the reporter part of you," Ly said from the hall, having reclaimed her dressing gown from James. James followed, looking sulky and wearing jeans.

"Happy birthday, sis," I said.

James, Roxie, and Sam looked trapped, as though they'd forgotten it happened to be our birthday.

"Thanks, you too," she replied. "You wanted to talk to me?"

"You see, Dad rang, and we're supposed to come round for breakfast," I explained.

"At six in the morning?" she clarified.

"Well, I don't really sleep these days," I added. "And he said something about 'at our earliest convenience' so I thought I'd wait until a civilised hour."

"Six in the morning is not a civilised hour," James said.

"Hush, you," I said, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Let me just get dressed," Ly said, walking back to her room. Roxie tiptoed back to her own room looking awkward. Sam poured himself a cup of coffee.

James crossed his arms protectively across his still bare chest and seemed to be wondering if I was going to hit him.

"How's things?" I asked conversationally.

"Fine," Sam said, sitting down on the sofa and petting Ly's cat. I nodded at him.

"Why don't you just get your own apartment?" I asked.

"How do you know I have money?" he asked.

"Sam, I was assigned to write the article about you and Will and your Anti-magus ward," I said.

"They're actually letting you write articles?" James asked curiously.

I nodded enthusiastically.

"What'd you do? Shag your boss?" Ly asked.

"Not my type," I said.

"You have a type?" James asked incredulously.

"Well, not exactly, but pudgy, middle aged men don't fit into what little type I do have," I said.

"That's fair," Ly said, linking her elbow with mine. "Shall we?"

"Yes," I said, turning on the spot and landing in the attic of our dad's flat.

"Shouldn't we be downstairs?" Ly asked curiously.

"Probably," I agreed. "But I need to talk to you."

She raised her eyebrow at me, looking slightly worried.

"Who'd you knock up?" she asked.

I recoiled. "Do I really sound that bad? No, I didn't knock anyone up," I said. "At least, not that I know of."

"That's not worrying at all," she replied.

"I'm kidding," I said. "I hope. Anyways, I need to talk to you about…"

I still have trouble saying it. I really wish I didn't. It would be easier if I wasn't going to have to suck up my pride and grovel.

And…apologise.

"Rose," I finally managed to say.

"You couldn't have thought to have this conversation before you slept with Fiona Finnegan?" she asked with an accusatory tone.

"I would've tried, but you were too busy fucking Fred," I retorted instantly, wishing I could take the words back the minute they were out.

She slapped me. Not very hard, but it made a nice sound.

I probably shouldn't have, but I replied in kind.

We regarded each other suspiciously.

"May we go back to a reasonable conversation now?" I asked.

"Yeah," she agreed.

"Thank you," I said. "What do I do?"

"About?" she prompted, sitting down on one of the lounge chairs. I sat down as well.

"The fact she hates me," I said.

"Apologising would be a good start," Ly suggested. I nodded. I was afraid of that. "But just…don't try anything. Just talk."

"Who says I would try anything?" I asked slightly indignantly.

She raised her eyebrow pointedly.

"Fine," I said.

"No chance you're not actually a whore and you just told Rose that to destroy her life, is there?" Ly asked, making her way to the door. I followed her and then stopped as I tried to process what she'd just asked.

"No…" I said slowly. "What kind of bullshit would that be?"

Ly nodded slowly. "Yeah, you two are going to have a great conversation."

OOooOOooOOooOO

I looked around the club and tried to find Rose. She was mysteriously absent.

Then I finally saw her in the middle of the dance floor. Staring disgustedly at the bloke trying to dance with her. Her scarlet curls were glittering in the lights from the ceiling.

I glanced over at Frank, who was watching Rose and her dance partner with a look of concern in his eyes.

He filled my glass distractedly and kept staring at them. "Isn't that Mark's brother?"

"Who the fuck is Mark?" I asked, drinking.

"You know, Mark Finnegan," Frank said. "He was dorm mates with me and James and Fred…"

I didn't hear what he said after that however, since I was too busy beating my way across the dance floor towards Rose and Ioan. I stumbled past a snogging couple and collided with Rose.

The three of us stared at each other, then said in perfectly unified disgust, "You…"

"What the fuck do you want, Malfoy?" Ioan asked. "Trying to reclaim your girl?"

"Piss off," Rose said, looking like she might slap Ioan.

"Well, yes, but that's not the point," I said.

"Since when am I 'your girl'?" Rose demanded.

"Then what is the point, Malfoy?" Ioan asked.

"You shouldn't be here," I said in the most menacing voice I could manage.

Given the slight look of fear that flashed across his face, it was apparently well done.

"It's not like everyone hasn't slept with her already," Ioan said dismissively.

Rose huffed indignantly.

"Funny, sounds like your sister," I said, letting a cruel smile linger.

I didn't even bother to duck when he hit me. I staggered backwards a bit, holding my eye.

Ioan was tensed for a fight. I let him sit there for a minute and stretched my fingers, cracking all the knuckles. He looked slightly concerned again, and failed to duck in time when I broke his nose. He did try, which I give him some credit for. But considering I've wanted to break his face since third year, he was really no match.

He fell backwards into a huge guy wearing all leather and a spiked dog collar. The guy had time to growl at Ioan before he lunged at me. He knocked me to the floor, but before he could actually hit me, the huge guy grabbed him in a headlock and dragged him out of the club. I jumped up to try and follow them and hopefully get in a few punches myself, but I found my arms bound by someone taller than me. Considering I know all of one guy who's taller than me who would prevent me from joining a fight, I stopped struggling. Mostly because my sister would kill me if I damaged her boyfriend.

"You should probably put something on your eye," James suggested, dragging me backwards towards the kitchen.

"No, James, don't put him in there, he'll give all the food diseases!" Rose called, running after us in her heels. James ignored her and deposited me on a slew of milk cartons. I lay there, unwilling to move.

James clapped Rose on the shoulder on his way out and winked at me, which probably meant Ly had told him of our conversation this morning.

Rose crossed her arms and glared down at me. When I didn't say or do anything, she rolled her shoulders in irritation like she was about to force herself to do something unpleasant.

"By all means, keep readjusting your arms," I said. "It does marvellous things to your tits."

She uncrossed her arms and set her jaw instead, giving me a death glare. "Do you want something?" she asked through gritted teeth.

"A kiss'd be nice," I said, using my winning smile. Usually, it makes girls melt at the knees and beg me to take them.

Rose, contrarily, rolled her eyes and huffed, starting to walk away. I sat up and grabbed her wrist.

"To talk," I said. "I just want to talk."

She resisted for a moment then slowly took another step back towards me so her arm wasn't half out of its socket.

"Well, to talk to you, I'm going to need a very strong drink," she said. I whistled sharply.

Frank stuck his head into the kitchen in confusion.

"Who whistled?" he asked.

"Rose needs a drink," I said. Rose looked like she very certainly did not want to be where she was, but nevertheless, she sat down on one of the milk crates next to me. Granted, she was about as far away as she could get, but she was still there.

Frank nodded, and in doing so, I saw the edge of a hickey on his neck.

He disappeared for a moment and came back with a drink.

"Thanks," I said. "And, Frank, nice hickey."

Frank slapped his hand over his neck and gave me a weak smile before disappearing back into the club.

"Why does Frank have a hickey on his neck?" Rose asked curiously, forgetting for a moment that she hates me.

"Because Roxie put it there," I said calmly, handing her the drink. "Where's Molly?"

"Kitchen closes at one. Doors close at one thirty. Bar closes at two. Everyone gets kicked out by two ten," she summarised.

I nodded.

We sat in silence for a minute.

"I'm sorry," I said finally, the words sounding wrong and foreign, albeit true, in my mouth.

Rose choked on her drink.

"What?" she demanded.

"Even though I didn't actually do anything to you personally, I'm sorry," I said.

"No, nothing to me," she said bitterly. "Because being a royal dick to your best friend is nothing."

"That's what I'm sorry for," I said, wishing I had a drink as well. "And I have a confession to make."

"Oh this should be good," she muttered.

"Over the past four years, I guess it's almost five now, I have never wanted anyone as badly as I want you," I said.

"You call that a confession?" she asked, taking another drink and staring straight ahead. "That was a well-known fact. This is how a proper confession goes."

She took another drink.

"I've only ever shagged four guys," she said in a completely dry voice. "I built myself a reputation as a whore to try and incite you into doing something stupid like getting a disease or getting some tramp pregnant. I lied to try and ruin your life."

I stared at her with my jaw in my navel.

"What?" I asked incredulously. "What about the…twenty four guys who'll swear on their dicks they shagged you?"

"They'll all swear because I told them they could," she said. "Only four of them are telling the truth."

I knew it was a stupid thing to say, but I heard it fall out of my mouth anyways. "So, technically, I did win the Whore War."

Rose rolled her eyes. "And are fucking lucky you didn't completely fuck up your life," she pointed out.

We sat in silence for another minute.

"I just want to know why," she said finally. "What in the name of Merlin possessed you to fuck Fiona Finnegan instead of doing something normal like talking to me?"

I nodded. This is definitely a conversation we should've had five years ago. Instead of now, when we're bitter.

"I had this theory that you only fall in love once and if that's gone or you fucked it up, then that's it," I said. "Then you're just fucked and there's nothing you can do about it, so you may as well do something stupid like become a manwhore. But then I saw my dad fall in love again even though my mum was dead, and I saw Ly and James be happy again, and I started to realise that you can fix things."

Rose nodded.

Then unlike every single other person I've talked to about this, she noticed the flaw in my explanation. "So that explains the Whore War part, and probably why we're having this conversation, but why'd you start it?" she asked.

Fuck.

"I was hoping you weren't going to notice that," I mumbled. "Since no one else has."

"Yeah, well, tough shit," she replied.

I nodded and took her drink, finishing it off.

"You know that feeling you get in your fingers when you're mad?" I asked. "When you just want to break something, and hell, maybe it'd be enough to break your own damn fingers?"

"Sure," she said.

"The itch to destroy something," I continued, wondering if she was actually going to understand what I was saying.

"Yeah," she said. "So what?"

"I dunno," I said slowly. "But when my mum died, it felt sort of like that, except everywhere."

She raised her eyebrow at me like I'd gone mad.

"It was like I was abandoned," I said. "Like she'd just ditched me and it just…it felt like I had to abandon someone. I had to destroy something and leave someone the way she'd left me. It was sort of like I had to make someone hurt as much as I did. You were just the easiest target, since it would hurt you the most."

She nodded bitterly.

"You think I'm full of shit don't you," I said. It probably should've been a question, but I was pretty convinced I was right.

She shook her head.

"No," she said. "I know that feeling. It's what I was trying to do to Ioan."

My brow furrowed in confusion.

"Who gave you abandonment issues?" I asked curiously.

She stared at me like I couldn't possibly be serious, which was nice since it meant she was looking at me.

"You did," she said.

"Oh," I replied sheepishly. "I'm sorry."

"I was in love with you," she said. Her past tense definitely registered. "Or as in love as you can be when you're fourteen, and then you just…"

"I turned into an arse," I supplied.

"You broke my heart," she said. She sniffed and I noticed with a horrible pang of guilt that there was a tear in the corner of her eye. She brushed it away impatiently. "I've been so mad at you for five years and this is the first time I've cried about that."

I very cautiously moved a milk carton closer.

"I've been living with the philosophy that when someone hurts you, you don't get mad, or sad you just-" she started.

"Get even," we said in unison.

"How's that been working for you?" I asked.

"It was fine until you had to go and turn human again," she replied.

I nodded.

"Since I'm human again," I started. She raised her eyebrow over her chocolate eye. "Can we do something normal?"

"Like what?" she asked.

"I dunno," I said. "Dinner?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Are you asking me on a date?"

"That is the socially acceptable term for it, yes," I said.

She shook her head at me incredulously.

"You've apologised," she said. "Fine for a start."

She stood up and headed for the door to the kitchen.

"Wait. Rose," I started, standing up and starting to follow her.

She glanced back over her shoulder and smiled disarmingly at me. I was familiar with that particular expression, since I've used it to my advantage many a time.

"Now you get to grovel," she said, walking out the door.

I stayed where I was for a moment and tried to process the evening's events. Slowly, I let a genuine smile creep across my face.

I ran out the door and saw her on the edge of the dance floor. I made my way over to her and followed Ly's advice about not trying anything.

"So, you're saying there's a chance?" I asked, not even touching her. I can do this. I can win a girl over without touching her first. There has to have been one…and if there wasn't, then Rose can be that one.

Her eyes were cold when she turned to look at me again. "A very small chance. It depends on how well you beg."

She walked away again, and I smiled to myself. A challenge then. I can deal with that.

After all, who am I to back down from a challenge?

**Review!  
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**So, the title is completely unrelated, I was just flipping through my iPod and found it and the title of that song always makes me laugh (it's by Senses Fail if anyone's curious) and I looked it up and apparently it's the name of an episode of LOST as well... I have yet to figure out where the phrase comes from, but it seemed to fit Scor's life (except with mommy issues instead). **

**On another totally unrelated not, I actually kind of hate Rose. You're probably all giving me sketchy looks, but I don't hate her in this particular story. I just generally dislike the character these days, and it's entirely my own damn fault. I wrote a different story called I Am Not My Father, about Rose and Scor and Rose is a total bitch to him through the whole thing, and I managed to poison myself against her so it's been really weird writing this and having Scor be the emotional bad guy. Sorry. None of you probably care. I'm just very sleep deprived and as such, I'm rambling. It's a bad habit. I'm going to try and stop now.**

**Thanks for reading! (And yes, there is one more chapter.)**


	43. 43: Finally

**A/N: Here we go. Last official chapter. To follow will be an epilogue. However, that will be later tonight. For now, you'll just have to do with this.**

**Chapter 43 - Finally (Rose)**

I opened my eyes and looked around my room suspiciously.

I live alone. I'm the only one of my friends who does. Ly, Dom, and Roxie share a flat above Madam Malkin's. Em and Will have taken to living together these days. Sam sort of lives with Ly, Dom, and Roxie. James, Fred, and Frank share a flat. Dylan and Al share a flat with Scorpius. Lucy and Lysander live above their ice cream shop.

The reason it was even relevant was because my room happened to be full of flowers.

I sat up and stared at them all.

There were roses in every single colour, tulips, gardenias, marigolds, lilies, daffodils, crocuses, irises, and in the corner, I think there was a bird of paradise.

On the pillow next to mine, there was a folded note.

I picked it up warily, slightly disturbed that whoever it was (it was probably Scorpius) had left a note in my bedroom. With flowers. Which meant he was in here while I slept. Which is sort of creepy.

_Rose –_

_So, the lady in the shop kept giving me looks like I was completely mad. She seemed to think this was overkill. It took me about half an hour to explain to her that there probably is no such thing where my grovelling is concerned. I think she took this to mean that I'd slept with my girlfriend's sister, which was the flower shop lady's capital offense. But you don't have a sister, and now I'm rambling about things that really don't matter._

_Anyways, I'll be at your club tonight, if maybe we could grab a drink together? Or maybe you could save me a dance. Or, just, something._

_Scor_

_Oh, and I didn't actually break into your flat. I had Will transfigure the flowers into mice and then had Sam charm them so they'd break in and set themselves up before they returned to their normal state. On that note, you might have a vermin problem._

I stared at the note in confusion.

I really wish I could still hate him. I successfully hated him for almost five years. All because he gave me abandonment problems. Unfortunately, I do know exactly what he was talking about when he brought up his mum. It makes it that much harder to stay mad at him.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Flowers?" Ly asked curiously. "Everywhere?"

"Yeah," I said. "A whole fuck ton of them."

"Is that more or less than a shit load?" James asked. "I mean, if you've got your shit loads, and your fuck tons…"

Ly and I stared at him for a moment and he clammed up, staring at the cobbled stone street.

"Well, that's something right?" Ly asked, opening the door to Lucy and Lysander's ice cream shop.

"Yeah, I suppose," I said grudgingly.

The minute we walked in, Lucy ducked out from behind the counter and walked over to us. She looked sort of sheepish.

"Erm…we'll go order," James said, grabbing Ly by the arm. "Rose, what do you want?"

"Chocolate," I said. James nodded and pulled Ly away.

"I, erm, I talked to Molly," Lucy said slowly.

"What about?" I asked, deciding to play dumb.

"She told me what happened with her old boyfriend and you, and the fact he was a dick," Lucy said. I nodded. "And I talked to Dom and Roxie."

I raised my eyebrow suspiciously. "What did you talk to them about?"

"The fact you aren't actually a slut," Lucy replied.

I nodded and we stood there in awkward silence for a moment.

"I guess I'm just sorry for being a bitch," she said.

"It's okay," I replied. "I would've been a bitch to me too."

She laughed. "Good to know."

"Here's your ice cream," Ly said, handing me a cone. "Lucy, how's business?"

"It's great," Lucy said earnestly. "We've already managed to pay back Uncle George."

I have yet to pay off my mother, but I'm close. I would be closer if I wasn't paying Frank, Roxie, and Molly, but I insisted. They said they'd work for free for a while, but I wouldn't let them.

"That's awesome," Ly said.

"Yeah, I know," Lucy said.

"Right, well, we've got to go back to work," James said, putting his arm around Ly.

"And I should probably go make sure my club isn't falling apart," I said.

"Does it do that?" Ly asked as we walked out of the shop.

I shrugged. "No, but the noise buffering spells tend to wear out quickly."

"Makes sense," James said. "You should get Sam and Will to look at them."

"Yeah, probably," I agreed. "I'll see you two later."

"Bye," Ly said, waving at me. I continued down the Alley to the club. To my surprise, Molly, Frank, and Roxie were already there.

Roxie was fiddling with the sound equipment, Frank was washing glasses, and Molly seemed to be getting a head start on food.

"Do you think I should hire a bouncer?" I asked, putting my jacket in my office. I like having an office. It's a nice feeling.

"Depends on how good the review in the Prophet is," Frank replied, stacking shot glasses.

"What review in the Prophet?" I asked.

"Certain reporters/photographers from the Prophet are writing a review," Roxie said.

"Wouldn't happen to be named Dylan Abernathy and Scorpius Malfoy, would they?" I asked.

"They would, in fact," Frank said.

Of course. The Prophet would sick the two youngest members of their staff on a club review.

"Because nineteen year olds are suddenly reliable when it comes to clubs," I grumbled.

"Dylan's technically still eighteen," Roxie piped up.

"Great," I muttered. "Just…great."

OOooOOooOOooOO

"You're writing a review of my club?" I demanded, crossing my arms and tapping my foot.

"Unfriendly management," Scorpius muttered, scribbling something down on a note pad.

"Don't write that," I said. "I'm only unfriendly to you."

He smiled at me. I hate it when he does that.

Besides the whole part about pretending to be a whore, I think the biggest lie I've ever told was when I said he didn't affect me.

"See, if you changed that attitude, you'd get a better review," he said cheerfully, taking a drink. "The live entertainment is wonderful, however."

I glanced at the platform in the corner where Roxie was singing.

"Yeah, I know," I said.

"Conceited management," he muttered, scribbling that down as well.

"Fuck you," I replied.

"Verbally abusive," he added, scribbling it on his notepad. "And yes please."

I glared at him.

"I am not under review," I said acidly. "My club is. Just because I'm a bitch to you doesn't mean my club is terrible."

"No, that's true," he agreed. "And your bar service is wonderful."

Frank grinned down at the end of the bar and slid Scorpius a drink.

"Have a seat," he commanded. "I'd like to ask you a few questions."

I debated my options, then sat. A flash went off. Scorpius and I turned and gave Dylan an accusing look.

"Make sure you mention the highly convenient broom cupboard," Dylan said, smiling roguishly.

"No," Scorpius said. "I'm not advertising sex."

Dylan, Frank, and I stared at him.

"Anymore," he added.

"Good clarification, mate," Dylan said, clapping him on the shoulder and disappearing into the crowd.

"So, Rose, when did you know you wanted to open a nightclub?" Scorpius asked.

"Well, that would've been in sixth year, when Professor Longbottom discovered the secret spot in Hogwarts where we all threw illicit parties that contained excess amounts of drugs and alcohol and I took the blame to keep my friends out of trouble," I said.

Scorpius nodded. "Okay, but what do you want me to write?"

"I dunno," I said. Frank gave me a curious look and handed me a drink. "Thanks."

"You didn't order anything," Scorpius said curiously.

"Only fools request certain drinks," Frank said. "I'm the son of a barmaid. I know what people need to drink."

Scorpius laughed and wrote it down. "How about, 'you always loved throwing parties and figured this was the best way to make that a career.'"

"Fine," I said. "What was with the flowers?"

He smiled to himself. "They were pretty," he said. "And that made me think of you."

He can't possibly be serious. Can he?

"Except you had to break into my flat to put them there," I accused.

He rolled his eyes. "I was serious in my note when I said I had Will transfigure them and Sam charm them. I didn't break into your flat."

I glared at him for a minute.

"Fine," I said. "You know what?"

"What?" he asked, looking up. His blond hair was falling in his eyes and I had to resist the urge to brush it off his face.

I steeled my nerves. "Write me a good review and I'll dance with you."

"Done," he said. "But the dance is now, even though the review won't be out until tomorrow."

I narrowed my eyes. "Fine."

He smiled, finished his drink, grabbed my wrist, and pulled me onto the dance floor. He spun me in a circle and caught me around the waist.

"See, this is nice," he said. I was grudging to admit it, but it was actually sort of nice.

"So?" I asked grumpily. I kind of just want to stay mad at him.

"The only reason you'd still be mad is because you're not over me," he whispered, his cheek brushing against mine, his lips just barely touching my ear. A shudder went down my spine. I pulled as far away as I could.

"Funny, considering we were never together, and we never did anything, and we never will," I said, succeeding in pulling out of his grasp. I didn't get very far, because he grabbed my waist again and pulled me back. He held the back of my head with the other hand and leaned down to kiss me.

It took me about a minute to regain enough feeling in my knees to step away from him. Whatever the other consequences were, he certainly learned a few things in his stint as the Casanova of Hogwarts.

We stared at each other for a moment, both of us breathing harder than normal.

He leaned forward like he was going to kiss me again, so I slapped him.

Then I did the only sensible thing I could think of. I ran.

OOooOOooOOooOO

It was about three in the morning when the door to my flat burst open. I grabbed my wand and pointed it at the door of my room.

"See, now I'm breaking into your flat," Scorpius said from the doorway.

"Go away," I said.

"Don't point your wand at me, Rosie," he replied, crossing the room and grabbing my wand arm.

"Why not?" I asked. "You just broke into my flat."

"You ran away," he accused.

"You kissed me," I reminded him.

"Which I should have done a very, very long time ago," he added. I glared at him. "Yeah, I fucked up. Quite a lot. But despite my very best efforts, and believe me I tried, I could never make myself stop caring about you."

"Yeah, well, that sucks, because I'm never going to stop hating you," I replied.

"Yes you are," he said confidently.

"What makes you so sure?" I demanded.

He grinned at me. "You dropped your wand."

I glanced at my now empty wand hand and back at him. "Fuck," I muttered.

He smiled softly at me and kissed me again.

Completely unbidden, my hands grabbed him and pulled him closer, pressing him entirely against me. He smiled against my lips and wrapped his arms around me.

"Do you remember when this all started?" I mumbled as he kissed my neck. It was growing increasingly hard to concentrate.

"Erm…sure," he said, sliding the strap of my nightgown off my shoulder and kissing it.

"I said I was going to win because you didn't affect me," I said. He smiled against my shoulder and trailed his fingers up my leg to the hem of my nightdress.

"I'm beginning to think that may have been a lie," he said smugly, sliding my dress up over my hips.

"Yeah," I agreed.

"Merlin, Rose, did you lie about _everything_?" he asked, sounding somewhat amused.

"Just about," I said.

He shook his head at me in mock disapproval. "See, at least I was honest about being a bad person."

"Yeah, yeah," I said dismissively. "Why do you and Ioan hate each other so much?"

He winced and pulled his hands off me. That was an unexpected consequence.

"He likes to rub it in my face that he had you before me," Scorpius said. "And that bothers me."

"That bothers you?" I asked.

"More than you can possibly imagine," he replied.

I smiled evilly. "Actually, no. I've got a pretty good idea," I said. "It'd be about equivalent to coming back to school after Christmas to find your best friend was sleeping with someone else."

"Fair enough," he said. He stood up and straightened his jeans. "I suppose I'll just be going then."

I stared at him in confusion. "Why?" I asked finally.

"Because you're still mad at me," he said. "But be forewarned, I'm not going to give up."

He was about halfway to the door when I finally stood up and grabbed his wrist. He looked down at my hand and then at me with his eyebrow raised.

"You don't have to go," I said.

He smiled and put his hand on my face, tucking my hair behind my ear. He kissed me softly.

"Yes I do," he said after a moment, resting his forehead against mine.

"Why?" I asked. "Because I'm still mad at you?"

"No," he said. "Because if I stay, we'll end up having sex. Considering that sex is the reason we haven't really talked in four and a half years, it would be better if we started an actual relationship. With dinner. Tomorrow. Eight o'clock. I'll pick you up at the club."

He kissed me again before I could argue with him and then disapparated.

I fell backwards on my bed with a thump.

Dinner. What a disturbingly normal concept. I guess that's sort of his point though. We've had enough problems being abnormal.

**Review!**

**The title is after the Frames song, Finally. "When you want something so much it's drawing trouble on your life. When you found something so good it's hard to focus on what's right."**

**Just because I looked over the chapter list for this story, I realise I have bizarre taste in music. One of the chapters is named after a song from The Nightmare Before Christmas, AFI, Queen, The Script, Snow Patrol, three Mumford and Sons, Breaking Benjamin, Don Henley, Alanis Morrisett, My Chemical Romance, She Wants Revenge, Nirvana, All American Rejects, All Time Low, Peter Gabriel, Billy Idol, Hey Monday, The Killers, The Dangerous Summer, Fall Out Boy, The Veronicas, Senses Fail, and now the Frames. This wouldn't be particularly weird, except I found all the chapter titles while scrolling through my iPod... Sorry for ranting at you all.**

**Thanks for reading!**


	44. Epilogue: Don't Panic

**A/N: Alright. I'm done. I know I said this would be up yesterday, but I apparently didn't mean it. I can hear again, which is a definite improvement over Friday. But yes. I took your suggestions into account for the epilogue, and someone said something about having Lucy narrate, and someone else (I'm too lazy to figure out who right now. Sorry.) suggested having it be five years later. I liked those two ideas, and even though I liked the others as well, those two stuck. So, this takes place five years after the end of the last chapter. And it is the end. Done. No more. Finally. It's only taken me a year or so to write this story...**

**Epilogue - Don't Panic (Lucy)**

"Other box!"

"Sorry!"

"No, don't put that there, it'll-" CRASH "…break."

Chaos. That was the only word to describe it.

"What about this one? Do you like this sweater?" Roxie asked, holding it up.

"Yes," Ly replied.

"But it's…scandalous," Dom said.

"I'm getting married, I'm not dead," Ly insisted, grabbing the sweater.

"Good, because that would be creepy on my part," James said.

I rolled my eyes at the four of them and kept stacking Dom's Quidditch books in a box.

"I still think you two should've just moved into the flat above the WWW," Roxie said, folding her own clothes into an ancient Hogwarts trunk.

"No, we'd have had to live with Fred if that were the case," Ly said.

"Yes, let's just get married and throw our bridesmaids out on their arses," Dom grumbled, hauling a crate of Bludgers out of her room.

"At least you've both got somewhere to go," I pointed out.

"I really do have a nice flat, don't I?" Sam asked, carrying one of Dom's boxes for her.

"Yes, you do," she agreed, kissing him.

"Ugh, sap fest," Roxie said, staring at them with minor disgust. I raised my eyebrow at her.

"So, flowers were a bad idea?" Frank asked from the doorway, holding a bouquet.

"No!" Roxie exclaimed, trying to backpedal. He laughed.

"Right," I said, standing up and dusting the knees of my jeans off. "I've left Lysander in charge of the shop, and that doesn't always end well, so I'll see you lot later."

"Bye, Lucy," they chorused.

"Thanks," Dom added, handing the box of books to Sam.

"Sure," I said. "Bye."

I ducked out of their flat and made my way to the shop. We'd only been open for about an hour, so hopefully, he hadn't managed to run us into the ground yet. I walked in to discover Al and Dylan sitting at one of the tables, drinking coffee.

"Hey, Luce," Al said. "Serving coffee was the best decision you ever made. Ever."

I raised my eyebrow at Dylan for explanation.

"We had a late night," Dylan said. I nodded slowly.

"Should I expect your business partner to show up in the next few minutes demanding explanation for last night?" I asked.

"If by business partner you mean my stepbrother, then probably," Dylan said.

"What'd you do to him?" I asked, sitting down at their table. Lysander handed me a mug of coffee and a kiss on the cheek before returning behind the counter.

"We may have moved all of his stuff into Rose's flat without his knowledge," Dylan said.

"And drunk all his alcohol," Al added.

"That was entirely you," Dylan said.

Dylan and I stared disapprovingly at Al for a moment. "You let him do that?" I asked finally.

Dylan shrugged. "He's funny when he's drunk."

"Aren't you both supposed to be at work?" I asked.

"Me? The drunken doctor?" Al asked. "Why on earth would I actually go to work on a Tuesday morning?"

"He just worked for two days, almost straight," Dylan supplied.

"Why?" I asked.

"Shift trades," Al mumbled, putting his head back down on the table. "Because no one else wanted to deal with the irate Tornadoes and Arrows fans who were busy having a countrywide brawl. Which doesn't even matter, since whoever wins the next game is going to lose to the Harpies anyways."

"What's your excuse, Dylan?" I asked.

"Well, see, my business partner and I are currently employed to write articles for the economics section, the lifestyle section, and the business section for four different papers," Dylan said. "All of which are about the WWW management transfer, Ly and James getting married, and what exactly the management shift is going to mean for the economy."

"Aha," I said. Ever since Dylan and Scor became freelance and then syndicated they've been somewhat hard to follow. No one can hire Dylan as a photographer without hiring Scor as the journalist and vice versa. "So, why were you moving Scor's stuff into Rose's flat?"

"Because I want my own damn place," Al grumbled. "They've been together for five fucking years, they can suck it up and live together."

"Mate, besides you and me, Lucy and Lysander, and Will and Em, everyone's been keeping their own place," Dylan pointed out.

"No, we don't have our own place," Al said. "Because of fucking Scor."

"That's not entirely true," I said. "James has essentially been living at Ly's place for three years."

"Right," Dylan said. "They're just making it official since he kept leaving his toothbrush there. And they're getting married in two months."

"Dylan, we are the only married couple in the entire universe who have a flatmate," Al said, sounding slightly unhinged and desperate.

"At least you don't have a talking dog," I said.

"Flatmate," Al repeated. "Worse than talking dogs any day."

"That can't possibly be true," Scor said from the doorway, pulling up a fourth chair to the table.

Al looked murderous. "Want to bet?" he asked with a demonic gleam in his normally peaceful green eyes.

"Did you drink all my alcohol?" Scor asked.

"Yes," Al said, staring into the depths of his coffee.

"You're a healer," Scor admonished. "Shouldn't you know how bad that is for your liver?"

"I'm a healer," Al replied. "I know how to fix it."

Scor nodded slowly. "Any chance you want to tell me where all of my things are?"

"Rose's flat," I said cheerfully.

Scor looked confused. "Why?"

"Because we took the liberty of moving you in," Dylan said.

"Does Rose know about that?" Scor asked.

"She does by now," Al said.

Scor looked mildly amused. "Right. Well, I'm going to go apologise to my girlfriend and then tell her you absolutely refused point blank to let me move back in."

"Sneaky," Dylan said.

"Shut up, you," Scor replied, apparating away.

"You're not supposed to apparate in the shop," I said, my eye twitching.

"You're just bitter because you're not allowed to apparate," Al said.

I gave him a death glare. "Remember why I'm not allowed?" I asked in a deadly whisper.

Al leaned back away from me a bit and looked nervous. "Lysander," he called across the shop. "Your wife's trying to kill me."

"Not yet I'm not," I replied.

"Hey, Luce," someone said, grabbing me by the shoulders and keeping me from trying to strangle Al.

"Joys of pregnancy already?" Em asked, raising her eyebrow at me.

"Al called me bitter," I said by way of explanation.

"The not apparating thing?" Em asked. I nodded. She smiled apologetically. "Unfortunately, it's not over yet, since you're not allowed to take them by side-along until they're seven and have shown magical ability."

"Three years down, four to go, right?" Will said, letting go of my shoulders.

"Mummy, mummy can I get ice cream?" their very small daughter asked, pulling on Em's hand.

"Only if you ask Uncle Lysander very nicely," Will said. The little girl's eyes lit up and she toddled across the shop to Lysander.

Al, Dylan, and I watched her.

"Is being a parent as bad as it looks?" I asked finally.

"No," Em said.

"It's worse!" Will supplied cheerfully. Em hit him in the arm. "I'm kidding."

"Best accident we've ever had," Em said, glancing across the shop. "Oh, Merlin."

She dashed across the room to the counter where Lysander was giving their three year old a giant cone dipped in chocolate with sprinkles and a huge scoop of ice cream.

"Oh, yeah, he's going to be a great father," Al muttered. I hit him in the back of the head. He laughed.

OOooOOooOOooOO

I put my head on Lysander's shoulder and stared at the framed pictures on the opposite wall.

"You're the prettiest," he said, kissing the top of my head. I raised my eyebrow skeptically and looked at the picture on the far left side of the wall. Our official wedding photographer had been too preoccupied taking a picture of my bridesmaids that he missed taking a picture of the kiss. Fortunately, Dylan always had a camera handy and snapped a picture for us.

"You're full of shit," I said, nodding significantly at the other pictures on the wall. In addition to our wedding pictures, there were also pictures of Em, and Lizzie, at their respective weddings. However, the next one was of Al and Dylan's wedding. Mr Malfoy had ended up paying for it, since Will somehow managed to convince Al he had to pay for his wedding. When I asked Will why Al was paying, he smiled mysteriously and then ran away. Al likes to grumble about it to this day. However, I know for a fact that Will made a donation to St Mungo's equal to the cost of his wedding. I'm not sure Al knows about that.

The next picture was of Em and Will's wedding party. Sam, Lizzie, Fred, and I all stood dutifully on either side of the bride and groom. It was just possible to see Mr Zabini in the background holding their then six month old daughter. Apparently, once Em told her dad she was pregnant, he grabbed Will by the collar and told him that if he didn't make an honest woman out of his daughter right that instant he'd have him killed. Em intervened and told him that she was not getting married until after she'd lost the weight from the baby.

For about a year, Fred was too scared of Mr Zabini to ask Lizzie to marry him. He finally grew a pair about a year ago. Their picture was next to Em and Will's. They haven't come back from their honeymoon yet.

"How long do you think it'll be before Sam and Dom get married?" I asked.

"I bet he does something stereotypically Sam-like and proposes accidentally in the middle of Ly and James's reception," Lysander said.

I laughed. "So true," I agreed. "What about Frank and Roxie?"

"Give them a few more years," Lysander said.

"You mean when they finally get over themselves and admit they've been in love with each other for years and it isn't just sex?" I asked.

"You'd think that after five years they'd have got to that point," Lysander said pensively.

"I know Frank is, but Roxie's stubborn," I said. "Although, now that she's probably moving into his flat, maybe they'll get over whatever their inhibitions are."

"I hope so," Lysander said. He laughed. "Do you remember the looks she gave us when we said we were getting married?"

"How she looked like I'd suddenly agreed to sell my soul to the devil?" I asked.

"Yeah, that look," he agreed.

"Frank looked kind of hurt about that," I said. "I dunno. I think it was just because we were the first ones to take the plunge."

"You make it sound like you sold your soul to the devil," he commented, lacing his fingers through mine.

"I dunno about that," I said. "But if this kid kicks me in the liver one more time, I'm going to be quite irked."

Lysander winced appreciatively.

"I'm sorry, and I love you?" he said, flinching like he sort of expected me to hit him.

"It's not entirely your fault," I said. "I was there too."

"What about Rose and Scorpius?" he asked, relaxing a bit.

"And getting married?" I asked. "I don't know."

"They will someday," he said confidently.

"I don't know," I said. "Could ruin his career. He still manages to pass himself off as single to get information out of people."

"Out of women," Lysander corrected.

"Not always," I said. Lysander blinked in confusion. "And it's just harder to do with a wedding ring on."

"He could always take it off," Lysander said.

"Not if he does something silly, like buy his rings from Sam," I said, glaring accusingly at him and pulling on my permanently stuck wedding ring.

Lysander shrugged apologetically. I shook my head at him. "I didn't know he'd charmed them," he said.

"Honey, it's Sam," I said. "He charms everything."

"I know that now," he said.

"Four and a half years too late," I added. He smiled guiltily. I shook my head at him.

OOooOOooOOooOO

"Just stop freaking out," Roxie commanded, grabbing Ly's shoulders to stop her from pacing.

"And stop walking around in your underwear," Dom added, holding up the dress.

"Cold feet?" Rose asked curiously.

"No," Ly said. "They're actually kind of swollen."

"She meant the emotional condition, not the physical condition," I said.

"I think I'm going to be sick," Ly said, dashing into the loo.

The four of us exchanged looks.

"What have I missed?" Em asked, walking into the bridal suite.

"Ly's feet are swollen and she feels sick," I summarised.

Em and I exchanged knowing looks while Rose, Roxie, and Dom looked confused.

"Lyra," Em said, knocking on the bathroom door. "How long have you been throwing up in the mornings?"

"Go away," Ly replied. Em waited. "A week."

Em and I exchanged looks again.

"And how long have you been waiting to tell James this?" I asked.

Roxie, Dom, and Rose understood at that moment and started squealing excitedly.

Ly opened the bathroom door and looked shameful.

"I was going to tell him on the honeymoon," she said sheepishly.

"Best of luck," I said, glancing at my own oversized belly.

"You'll do fine," Em said comfortingly.

"At which part?" Ly asked. "Being married or being pregnant or being a mother?"

"Yes," Em said. Roxie and Dom hugged her.

"But my mum and I never got along," Ly said, sounding like she was starting to panic. "Ever. And then she died. And now I'm pregnant."

"Well, there has been an almost ten year gap between the two events," Rose pointed out.

Ly just stared at her.

"You'll be fine, Ly," I said. "Just…don't panic."

**Review! (Since it's your last chance)**

**Title from the Coldplay song, and in fact the inspiration for this entire story, even though the song actually has nothing to do with it. **


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